GalaxyDancer's "Crush"

Chapter 08: Secrets

Author's Comments:

Wheee! You know, I think THIS chapter is really my favorite. This is even funnier than that OTHER funny chapter. After letting Lin into his base (and what a mistake THAT was), she just can't seem to stay out of his way. In fact, she goes snooping around his base, interfearing with his work and looking through his private things. And, of course, she uncovers a few embarrassing little secrets about the Irken's past.

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It was a little later in the day. Zim was still down in his lab working on a new microchip experiment. He pushed a few buttons on his computer console, then picked up some strange electricity tool thing and shocked the little microchip. He sat it back down. He typed some more at his computer, then was ready to reach for the electricity tool thing again, but instead found Lin in it's place, staring at him with her hands behind her back.

Zim looked confused. Lin only smiled and handed him the electricity tool thing. He scowled at her, and she giggled and ran off somewhere.

A little later, Zim was taking a break and sitting at the kitchen table looking over some other papers, these about his experiment. He was concentrating on them very hard trying to figure out something. Just as he thought he had the solution, Lin snatched the papers out of his hands and folded them into a giant heart. She smiled and gave them back to him. Then she giggled and ran off somewhere.

Zim growled. He unfolded the papers and continued studying them, trying to remember the answer he had come up with.

Even later still, close to when school was about to let out, Zim was in his lab again testing his new microchips out on a chicken, when Lin came up to him and tugged at his shirt.

Zim turned around, curious.

Lin pointed to the far side of the lab, and Zim gasped. Half of this lab room was wrecked! Test tubes, wires, computer screens . . . all jumbled together in a crazy way that made a picture of a heart with an arrow going through it. Gir was on top of it laughing insanely.

Zim growled even louder. He reached for a weapon to fire at the pest, but she jumped to a computer console and typed a few codes she stole from him, then on screen appeared all of Zim's history. Pictures, documents, genetic codes, all displayed for her to see. She pushed the arrow onscreen and scrolled down, revealing an embarrassing picture of Zim as a smeet, sitting on the floor of an alien place, naked, playing with the circuitry of a little robot bee.

Gir screamed excitingly at the top of his lungs at the sight! "Baby Zim! Lookit' how cute you were!"

Zim's mouth dropped open. The weapon he had grabbed fell from his hand. Beads of sweat formed on his forehead and he looked almost frightened. He suddenly screamed in terror.

Things were quiet for a while, about until nighttime. Zim was sitting on the sofa watching television with Gir, trying to cool off some of his anger towards the Lin girl. He knew not what she was up to now, but she was leaving him alone for the moment, and that was what mattered.

Gir was sucking on a Suck Monkey while watching TV with his master. It was normal, boring. But at least there was no Lin to spoil Zim's slowly returning happy mood, which he was always in when he was planning on how to destroy Mankind. Yes, perhaps she had learned to leave him alone and stay away from his things.

Suddenly there was a snicker from the kitchen. Zim heard it, but ignored it, figuring Lin was only daydreaming about him again. She giggled when she dreamed about him, so he had learned from his experiences today.

Another giggle, this one louder, shattered Zim's thoughts. He clenched his left fist around the arm of the couch. His right, he grabbed the cushion with. He gritted his teeth. Then he paused everything and took a deep breath, telling himself to let it go. It was no big deal, whatever it was.

Lin giggled louder still, more of a laugh now. Zim growled and got up, ready to find out what was so funny. He walked into the kitchen, spied Lin, and almost fell over backwards at the sight of what she had in her hands. It was a certain familiar spiral notebook with a black cover that had the Irken watermark on the front, and right underneath that in blue letters read "Zim".

Another laugh escaped Lin's voice as she turned a page. She looked up, feeling Zim's presence, and smiled. She looked like she had a dirty secret.

"MY LOG BOOK!" screamed Zim. He ran over to Lin and grabbed it right out of her hands. He was even more panicked now than ever before. "How could you? This is my personal property!" He looked at what page she was on. Page thirty-seven. The sight of the page number struck fear into him. "No . . . NO! NOOOOOO!"

Lin giggled.

Zim was hyperventilating. "All of my thoughts, my secrets, my life . . . EXPOSED! The mission, my plans . . . my habits, my weaknesses . . . all read by a disgusting female Earthenoid smeet!" He suddenly turned on Lin. "You! You horrible, sick creature! GET OUT OF MY BASE THIS INSTANT!"

Lin's smile faded. "But-"

"GET OUT! NOW!"

"But-"

"NOW!"

Lin smiled again and giggled. She got up from the chair and skipped over to the door. "Okay, see ya tomorrow, Zimmy!" She blew him a kiss, and left. Zim looked out the window and could see her singing all the way down the street until she was out of sight.

"GIR!" he cried. Gir hopped in front of him, saluting, his head covered in chocolate bubblegum. "Yes, sir!"

Zim gulped. "Gir, we have to leave for a few minutes. Now. The Dib should know what to do."