I don't own Ed, Edd n Eddy or Final Fantasy. Curse ye, damned fates!

Chapter 1: It begins...God help us all...

"C'mon, ya stupid clock...hurry up and say its three!" Eddy muttered loudly under his breath, staring at the old clock on the English classroom wall, chewing his pencil. Summer break was just a few minutes away, and everybody was on the edge of their seats, waiting for the bell that would set them free until September. In fact, Ed was so anxious that he wasn't just chewing on his pencil, he was eating the darned thing!

The only person who wasn't excited was Edd, because he knew he would miss the teachers, the old classrooms(excluding the gymnasium), the smell of chemicals in the science lab, etc.. And yet, he knew he couldn't help but be excited at the prospect of a new step up in the academic medium, and being one step closer to graduation, college, and all steps beyond!

BRRRIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNG!

"FREEEEEEEEDOOOOMMM!" Eddy yelled, jumping on top of his desk, throwing his school papers into the air.

"Now class, have a good summer, and don't forget to--YAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Mr. Fogarty, the English teacher yelled as the students trampled him on their mad stampede out of the classroom.

"Mr. Fogarty! Are you alright?" Edd said, rushing over to the semi-flattened old man splayed out upon the floor.

"Eddward, I think I need a doctor...will you please call 911?" Mr. Fogarty whispered weakly.

"Of course Mr. Fogarty. Just give me a mo--"

"C'mon sockhead!" Eddy said, coming back into the room, grabbing Edd by the shirt collar, and dragging him away.

"B-but Eddy! What about Mr. Fogarty?" Edd cried out.

"Eh, he'll be alright," Eddy said dismissively. As Mr. Fogarty lay there, with 2 broken ribs, a broken nose, and a dislocated shoulder, he began to cry out weakly to his fellow staff members. Unfortunately for him, most of them had already left with the students, uproariously joyful at school year's end. In the meantime, Ed was waiting for his chums outside, happily reading The Reptile People of Sersous 8--his most recently bought comic book-- whilst picking lice out of his newly grown out yet still short red hair.

"Eddy! Double D!" Ed exclaimed as he saw his friends emerge from the school.

"Hey monobrow," Eddy said, still dragging Edd by his shirt.

"Eddy, Will you please let me go?!" Edd said, deeply annoyed at being drug across the filthy school floor.

"Fine," Eddy said, letting go of Edd's collar. "And just forget about that geezer!"

"But Eddy, he could be seriously injured!" Edd said, looking back concernedly.

"Eh, the janitor'll help him. Now c'mon!" Eddy said, starting to walk back to the cul de sac with Ed tailing behind him eagerly.

I I I I I I I I

Just at that moment, the janitor, Horace, did so happen to walk by Mr. Fogarty's classroom, where he still lay.

"Horace! Hey, Horace!" Mr. Fogarty exclaimed as the janitor walked by. Horace stopped, and slowly turned around to look down at Fogarty. "Well? Don't just stand there! Do something!" Mr. Fogarty said angrily, glaring back at Horace's wooden expression of disconcerted apathy.

"Say," said Horace in a dull monotone. "Ain't you the teacher that's always saying that janitorial services are overrated?"

"Er…..well….that is to say, I…..," Mr. Fogarty muttered sheepishly, looking rather embarrassed.

"Thought so," said the old custodian as he slammed the door shut. As he locked the door, and as the muffled screams of Mr. Fogarty could be heard on the other side, Horace grinned darkly. "Have a good summer, Fogey-boy. Heh, heh, heh," he muttered as he walked off, pealing into evil chuckles.

I I I I I I I I

"So, do you guys wanna come over to my place and play Omega Grand Prix on the Game Station my folks got me for my birthday a few months ago?" Eddy said as they entered cul de sac.

"Ooh! I do! I do!" Ed shouted, jumping up and down.

"Actually, I was going to go to the old mansion, and explore that cornucopia of literature in its library," Edd said in a faraway voice, recalling the memory of seeing all of those wondrous tomes; so neatly organized, and all his for the taking.

Eddy stopped dead in his tracks, spun around, and came face to face with Edd, his face full of anger and shock. "Are you nuts?!" Eddy bellowed, spraying Edd with spit. "Don't you remember what happened the last time we went there? The Kankers stripped us nude and forced us into marriage! Do you wanna go through that again?"

"But Eddy, do you seriously think that they would use that same ploy again?" Edd said, wiping the spit from his face. "And after all, it's been so long since then! But you two can come if you want."

"Oh no, no way! Forget it! I'm not going through that ceremony of horrors again!" Eddy said, backing up. "Eddy don't take no chances!"

Ed suddenly came up from behind Eddy, grabbed him by his three long hairs, and lifted him into the air. "Eddy, we can't leave Double D defenseless," Ed said angrily, holding Eddy up high so he could talk to him face-to-face. "Do not worry Double D, for I shall ward off any Kankers that might show up with my Mighty Toe of Justice!" Ed then kicked his shoe off and held up his Mighty Toe of Justice, and as you might have guessed: Edd fainted from the fumes, Eddy gagged, and a few birds fell from the sky.

Later, after Edd was doused with some cold water and Eddy forced Ed to put his shoe back on, the Eds walked through the dandelion-strewn front yard of the creepy old house. The moment they opened the creaking front door, a powerful odor of dust and wood rot hit them, but after the Mighty Toe of Justice, that was nothing. After a bit of searching, they finally managed to find the old library that Edd was so anxious to revisit, and he immediately proceeded to go dashing about it gleefully.

"Seriously, I don't know what you see in libraries," Eddy said after a few minutes, a bite of impatience in his voice. "They're so frickin' boring!"

"Just hold on, Eddy! I'm almost done picking out the books I want," Edd said, holding a stack of about seven books in his arms.

Eddy walked over to Edd and cocked his head to the side, examining the spines of the books. "Gilgamesh...The Odyssey...Journey to the West, volumes 1-4...Ramayana...what the heck are these books about?"

"They're epics, Eddy!" Edd said, enthusiastically. "Epics are long tales or poems, usually telling of how a hero goes out to find something, get to a certain place, reach a certain goal, etc., and throughout almost every epic, they usually make good friends, dangerous enemies, and so on. Like in Journey to the West, when Sun Wukong makes many allies out of people he has duels with, or--"

"Or like when Captain Jetstar refused to pay the outrageously high toll fee that the Black Hole Bandits set out on his way to find the Ultima Crystal, and ended up making mortal enemies with them?" Ed spouted out, unexpectedly.

Edd and Eddy stared at Ed for a moment before Edd said, "Well, I suppose that is something that would happen in an epic. That's very observant of you Ed."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Now c'mon! My video games await!" Eddy said, paying little attention to Edd.

"Video games!" Ed shouted, beginning to jump up and down continually. "Video games! Video games! Video ga-" Before Ed could finish shouting, the old floorboards gave way to his jumping, and he fell through, landing on the bottom floor with a loud crash.

"My goodness!" Edd cried out, rushing over to the hole in the floor. "Ed! Are you alright?!"

"Do it again!" Ed replied happily from below.

"Yep, he's fine. C'mon, let's go get him before he gets into any more trouble," Eddy said, walking over to the old twisting staircase that lead to the basement.

"Right behind you Eddy," Edd said, setting the large stack of books aside for the moment. When they reached the basement, Ed was running joyfully in circles.

"Guys! I found the coolest thing under this weird elevator thingy!" Ed said, pointing to the nearby dumbwaiter.

"That's a dumbwaiter Ed, primarily used to--"

"Can it Gabby!" Eddy said, cutting Edd off and pushing him aside. "Now then, what did ya find lumpy?" Ed ran over to the dumbwaiter and lifted it up to reveal not a solid concrete base, but an old trapdoor with rusty hinges!

"My word! It's looks like there is more to this house than we first thought!" Edd exclaimed, running over to examine the old trapdoor.

"Hey! I just had a thought!" Eddy said, running over to the trapdoor and pushing Edd out of his way again.

"Really? Well, you had better alert the media," Edd said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"What if there's secret pirate treasure hidden underneath the house, and this trapdoor is the only way to get to it?" Eddy exclaimed happily, after giving Edd a death glare.

"Eddy, what possible brand of logic would suit the idea of pirates burying a treasure here, when we're a considerable ways away from any coastal area?" Edd said in an exasperated tone.

"Hey, it's possible. Now c'mon! The treasure awaits!" Eddy said, throwing the door open and jumping straight down.

Edd sighed. "Well, I had better follow him, in case he injures himself. Coming Ed?"

"Right behind you, Double D!" Ed said joyfully, tailing behind Edd. Unlike Eddy, Edd actually checked to see if there was another way to go down, and luckily, he found a rope ladder. When they finally got to the bottom of the passage, they found Eddy standing nearby, tapping his foot impatiently.

"What took ya?" he said, rounding on his two friends.

"Eddy, that was a straight 35 foot drop! How can you even stand up?" Edd said, staring at Eddy in amazement.

"Eh, it wasn't so bad. Let's go!" Eddy said, yet he collapsed after about three steps. "Uh, could one of you carry me until I get the feeling back in my legs?" Eddy said embarrassedly.

"Up you go, little man," Ed said, hoisting Eddy up on his shoulders. Edd, on the other hand, was busy examining their surroundings. It appeared to be an old stone tunnel, dimly lit by an covering of unusual bioluminescent fungus on the ceiling, and with its walls engraved with a strange series of cryptic runes.

"How extraordinary! I had no idea such a place existed underneath our humble cul de sac!" Edd exclaimed.

"Believe it! Onwards, Ed!" Eddy said excitedly. The Eds walked for what seemed like hours, and as they traversed further down the old tunnel, the glowing light of the ceiling-fungi seemed to lessen more and more, until Edd had to pull out an emergency flashlight, used mainly for power surges.

"Uh, Double D?" Eddy said nervously, stopping suddenly (a while back he got off Ed's shoulders and started walking on his own). "Did you happen to notice that the old writing on the wall in starting to glow?"

"Eddy, that's ridicu--" Edd paused, for he began to notice it as well. The seemingly ancient runes began to give off a strange blue glow, lighting the pathway enough for Edd's flashlight to be unnecessary.

"Coooooool," Ed said, staring at the old writing.

"Eddy, something tells me we should leave," Edd said fearfully, begin to back up.

Eddy immediately shook off his willies and said angrily, "No way. We came here to find treasure, and we're not gonna stop, whether you like it or not!"

"But Eddy," Edd said pleadingly.

"No buts! Now let's go!" Eddy said, trudging on. After another ten minutes of walking, they came to a dead end: another wall, circular and smaller, but still covered with those glowing runes. "Aw, man!" Eddy said furiously, grinding his teeth. "We came all this way for nothin'!"

Edd, however, was examining the ancient writing intently. "Eddy! Eddy! Come here! You're not gonna believe this!" Edd exclaimed excitedly. "I can actually understand the writing on this part of the wall! It's in actual English!"

"Really? Lemme see!" Eddy said, running over to get a better look. His face fell. "Looks like a bunch of riddles. What kind of schmuck writes a bunch of stupid riddles on a wall?" Eddy asked skeptically.

"It means that to pass through, we must answer the riddles. Just like in the movies!" Ed spouted out.

"Ed, a seriously doubt that, but with what's been going on lately, we might as well try," Edd said, sounding tired. Edd walked over to the wall and began to read aloud. "Man goes over, man goes under, and during war it burns asunder. Well, that's easy. A bridge." Edd said. Instantly, the first riddle faded into nothing. "Well I'll be! Perhaps Ed was right! Alright, one down, five to go," Edd muttered to himself. "Now let's see here. No sooner spoken than broken. Hm, another easy one. Silence." Once again, the answered riddle disappeared from the wall.

Edd continued to do so, with each riddle tougher than the last. Finally, he came to the last riddle on the wall. "Finally! Now let's see, Out of the eater came forth meat, and out of the strong came forth sweetness." Edd had to think for a bit before stating, "It was made by Samson the Strong. The eater is a lion; the sweetness is honey, made by bees which hived in the lion's skull." At that, the last of the runes on the wall disappeared. Then, without warning, the wall crumbled to dust before their very eyes revealing a very dark room. "Good lord!" Edd said.

"Well c'mon! Let's go!" Eddy said in ecstasy, running into the room.

"Tally-ho!" Ed cried, following Eddy into the mysterious chamber.

"Uh, right behind you," Edd said, also going into the room.

"Hey Double D, turn on your flashlight, I can't see a thing," Eddy said, trying to find his way around in the darkness. Edd then turned on the flashlight, and immediately they saw what the wall had been hiding. It looked like a doorframe of about 10 feet by 5 feet, made of solid stone. The outer edges of the strange doorway were traced with the same runic writing that had lined the walls outside, albeit without the odd glowing.

"What in heaven's name...?" Edd said bemusedly, walking over to the strange spectacle.

"The heck? We came all this way to find some stinkin' piece of junk!" Edd yelled, beside himself with fury.

"Eddy, please calm yourself!" Edd said, frustrated. "There must be some reason this was placed here. But the question is, what exactly is it, and why was it put here?"

"Wow, Double-D, I thought you were smarter than that!" Eddy stated smugly, walking over with crossed arms. "It's pretty darn obvious what it is and why it's here!"

"Oh really?" Edd stated irritably. "Then, by all means, do tell me of the wonders of said object!"

"Well, first off, it's obviously a door! Duh!" Eddy sneered condescendingly. "And why it's here...Well, uh..." He began to falter, scratching his head.

"Yeeessss?" Edd chirped, grinning slyly.

"Er...It, uh...obviously...erm...Leads somewhere! Yeah, that's it!" Eddy cried, trying to regain his composure.

"Oh please, Eddy," Edd said, rolling his eyes. "In case you haven't noticed, it'd be like walking through a regular doorfr--ED! WHAT'RE YOU DOING?!"

"Awesooooome!" Ed gurgled mindlessly, running his hands over the doorframe's runes, which began to glow an ominous violet. "It's shiny! Like my dad's calves!"

"Good lord Ed! Stop! You don't know what consequences may be yielded by such irrational actions!" Edd cried sternly.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Didn't understand a word ya said, Double-D!" Ed said happily, still rubbing the runes.

"Ugh," Eddy groaned, smacking his forehead in exasperation.

Suddenly, the empty air within the stone frame began to shimmer and glow the same shade of purple as the runes. Soon, it looked like there was a strange lopsided pool of violet liquid within the frame.

"Whoa," Eddy croaked, staring at the shimmering sight.

"My goodness," Edd breathed, walking over to the spectacle tentatively. "This is incredible! It almost seems like an optical illusion, like Aurora Borealis, but there's no light down here that could cause it, and no machinery nearby that could project it! Somehow, contact from Ed seems to be the only reasonable cause, but...why?"

"I got the magic fingers, Double-D!" Ed stated proudly, flexing his digits. "These little guys have touched nether regions far beyond the scope of--"

"Ah-ah-ah! Stop! Shaddup!" Eddy cried, stuffing his fingers in his ears. "I don't wanna hear the details!"

"I concur," Edd said, looking pale.

"Aw..." Ed said sadly, his fingers now drooping pathetically. Suddenly, he perked up again, and turned to face the doorway. "I know what'll cheer you up, little friends!" Slowly, he began to reach towards the purple, shimmering center. "Let us touch yet another strange spectacle!"

"Ed, what are you doing?! Don't!" Edd burst, leaping to stop him.

"Hold the phone, Lumpy!" Eddy said, following suit.

However, just as the both of them had reached their brain-dead friend, he had touched the strange illusionary sight, and, with a bright purple flash, the three of them were gone.

They felt like they were falling, but strangely enough, they seemed to be falling...sideways. Where they were falling was even stranger. They could breath, and, for that matter, scream just fine. Yet, they seemed to be toppling through space at a blistering speed, going past various planets, stars, and other intergalactic things. Finally, they felt like they were finally beginning to slow down, and soon, they stopped. They had stopped above what appeared to be a blue, lush-looking garden planet, highly similar to Earth. Unlike Earth, however, this planet was orbited by two moons. One light red, the other light blue. After a moment of shocked silence, they soon felt like they were falling again, this time plummeting downwards towards the planet. After a few seconds, there was another blinding flash of light, and they fell out of a doorway identical to the one in the underground cave.

After they gathered their bearings, they examined their current surroundings. Well, Edd did, Eddy was too busy hurting Ed in any way possible for getting them where they were, with little to no visible results. They were surrounded by dense forestry, somewhat similar to that back home. In the distance, numerous chirping, grunting, howling, and croaking noises could be heard. It seemed to be nighttime, wherever they were, giving the place an even more ominous feel.

Wherever they were, Edd definitely didn't like it.

To be continued...