The Hands of God-

Because some things get broken and only certain people can fix them.

And I'd give everything
Just to be touched once more
By the Hands of God/

Chapter the First- Grounded

Another day, another fight. Another stunning victory of six verses hundreds. And who could blame them? It wasn't as though they had instigated it; rather it was the hordes of men and women who lay bleeding and mutilated at his feet that had caused the whole problem in the first place.

Swords that had the gall to think they could have sliced him. Clubs that dared to bring their weight down on him. All useless, for the weapons may have landed hits but never injurious (the doctor seemed to disagree with the latter part of the statement; yet the reindeer could not understand that sleeping is a better method of regaining lost blood than covering the wounds and dressing them).

"Oi! Zoro!" His captain approached behind him, unscathed as well. Exhaustion began to demand control over his body. He stood in silence without an answer for his captain. Impervious to the silence, the boy hopped and skipped and jumped over to his first mate. "Zo-ro! You sure kicked a lot of ass!" A slap on the back that was slightly stronger than a normal captain would administer. "Awesome, Zo-"
Pain.
His legs fell to pieces as though their bones had been removed. He fell painfully to his knees, his hands flailing foreword to support him as his stomach retched and violently offered a rush of blood and acid for the awaiting earth. And it was like this, bowing to the setting sun, that his eyes closed and the pain let itself go.

Pain was the first thing his conscious mind was aware of. After that came the slower but equally powerful force of hunger and thirst.

How much time had passed since he had fallen?

Instead of trying to answer impossible questions, he considered figuring out his surroundings. He was almost certainly aboard the Going Merry; lying facedown (and shirtless) in some sort of a bed. He inhaled and confirmed he was in fact in Nami's bed. Wouldn't she be pissed off? As if it wasn't bad enough that he was nearly immobile from the pain in his back, her perfume had bled into the sheets of her bed and was currently in the process of suffocating him.
Voices.
"…And then Luffy whacked him on the back. He had already taken more hits than a normal person could stand." The reindeer hopped onto the bed and began to poke his naked back with an extended hoof, sending waves of pain rocketing up and down his body. He bit his lip to keep from screaming and coincidentally looking like an idiot in front of whatever audience Chopper was speaking to.
"So, is he gonna be okay?"
" 'Course he's gonna be okay, Usopp! I would know if he wasn't, 'cause I'm the captain."
"…That's a new power."
The doctor began wrapping what seemed to be very thick toilet paper around his back. "Nee. Anyways, I'll bind his spine so that the bone heals straight. But we might have to seek a specialist on the mainland if the pain gets worse."

My spine? Specialist on the mainland?

"Oi, Chopper." The navigator was probably already angry for losing her bed. "Don't you think that's a little overboard? No doctor would take a pirate, 'specially one with a bounty on his head like Zoro."
"Ah, Nami-san is so wise to think ahead!"
What he had thought to be toilet paper was in fact a bandage. Chopper tied it off, albeit clumsily considering his hooves. "Zoro's more important. Besides, even if we do get caught it's not like it'd be the first time, nai?"
There was a group concurrence. Even Zoro had to agree that it would take more than a fractured spine to stop him from escaping a Marine base.

"Um." Chopper had run out of things to say. "That's about it."A finger attached to a rubber arm started poking him exactly where it hurt most. "Hey. Zoro. Zoro. Zo-ro. Ni-gu. Ni-gu. MEAT! I'm hun-gry!"
"OI! STOP THAT!" Chopper had the tendency to be neurotic about keeping the captain near his patients after hearing what he did to Nami before they had come to Drum. Nami and Usopp apologetically dragged their hungry captain up to the deck in an attempt to keep him away from his injured nakama.

That left the doctor, the cook and himself.

He was faintly aware of whispering for more than just a couple of seconds. This was followed by the cook's incomparable tenor: "You want me to WHAT?"
The doctor sighed. "But, Nami-san will have to sleep in his hammock. The hammock besides yours, for the whole time."
"I won't."
"Please, Sanji-kun."
"No freakin' way."
"I'll show Nami the pictures you take of her at night."
"I said, no f…WHAT THE HELL?"
"I will."
A groan. "Man, but after doing it for every sick bastard on the Baratie you'd know what you have to put up with." The cook rarely brought up his old life, which meant what they were talking about must be of some importance to him to not do.
"I'll give you the pictures I took of Vivi-chan changing…"
A long pause.
"…And how did you get those?"
"Stole them from Luffy, nee."
"Fine. But how long do I have to do it for?"
"Until he's better, I guess. Maybe twice a day for two weeks. But knowing him, he'll be out training in less than half that time so you might have to do it three times a day in the second week. Just don't hurt him more, ne?"

A clop-clop-clop and a slam guaranteed that he was indeed alone with the bastard cook. He was beginning to become more and more worried about what the hell the doctor and cook had been planning, but only time would tell.

…The doctor was right about one thing. He planned to be outside the next day, injury or not. Until then, he tried to figure out how much training he was missing with each passing moment. Not like he had ever been good at math or anything.

"Oi. You sleeping?"
He considered for a while whether or not to respond. The cook seemingly took this as a yes and ground his cigarette into the corner of the night table right beside his head, filling his nose with the perfume of noxious gas and lethal chemicals.

A moment hanging in time and space, and quite suddenly the smell of vanilla permuted the hazy afternoon air.

/kanthia notes-
warai...
I'm still working on Rafteru but needed to take a break. This fic is actually kinda old but I lost it (notes: like everything else ;;e-e) when my computer exploded/virused. Now that I look back, I think the old version kinda sucked 'cause I included Sanji-kun's point of view.

...Just what does Sanji have lined up for our unfortunate injured Zoro that involves vanilla?
...You can bet it'll be kinky.

Poor Zoro.