Author's Ramblings: Hey guys. If you've read my other stories, you'll probably notice none of them are exactly finished yet … well … sorry. But, I had an extremely head-banging-on-the-desk moment this afternoon which I'd rather not revisit, so I decided to write out a pondering suspicion of my own to get my mind of that bloody test. –Glares at test- Oh … er … back to what I was saying. Yeah … so this is a one-shot, in case you haven't noticed, but if I like it enough I'll make it a story. Please read and review!
One thing about this one-shot: Okay, so this is kind of important, so listen closely. JK Rowling commented a while back in some interview (I've read so many I forgot the "name' of it) that "Remus was rather fond of Lily but he never competed with James, no." So … this one-shot starts off as Remus's POV… but then it starts to move around more. Hope you like it.
One beg and one beg only: Please, please, please, read and review! I will love you forever if you read and review!
P.S.: Sorry for any typos. I went through the first couple pages, but then I really didn't want to have to re-read my work. Again. So sorry if typos annoy the hell out of you. But I really don't think there'll be too many of them.
--ONE MOMENT--
A quiet bookworm was what he was. Sure, he hung around two of the most mischievous boys in the school, but the only reason he was their friend was to keep them under control. Well, er, so he said when he saw them plotting another prank.
So being the quiet bookworm that he was he had to admit that James was just running after something way out of his league every time he decided to court Lily Evans. You, humble reader, would probably ask why Remus's being a quiet bookworm mattered to this. Ah, here is the fact: Remus wanted Lily.
Remus was a great, excellent, perfect match for Evans. James was, well … James was James and he really had a track record that resembled two-hundred-something thousand feet of parchment – and that was just at Hogwarts. Merlin knew what he got up to over the summer. Remus knew his friend was deeply in love with Evans for unknown reasons (to the Marauders at least), but James was a prankster player. He was a P.P. He was a big P.P. Head.
Remus smiled at his new nickname for his friend.
James probably only wanted Lily because he couldn't have her.
With a sigh Remus took back the thought. No, James wasn't like that. He may be insanely stupid, a big P.P. Head and Merlin else, but he wouldn't do that to anyone – Evans in particular. Remus was just a bit desperate for a reason to snatch Evans up out of James's sight and claim her as his own. Mark her as his territory, like the werewolf in him urged – no, begged – him to do.
"So I'm not so sure if you're supposed to tap it twice and then mutter the incantation, or if you're supposed to mutter the incantation and then tap it twice."
Remus gave a start at the voice. He had obviously been daydreaming.
"Pardon?" he asked as kindly as possible – very kindly, it came out.
"Have you been listening to me, Remus?"
"Yes, I have, Lily, but not the last part. Sorry my mind was elsewhere," Remus said, loosening his tie uncomfortably.
"Are you quite sure you're all right?" Lily asked, inspecting Remus for signs of insanity or boyish thoughts.
"I'm fine."
"Mmm … I'm not so sure," she mumbled.
"So … you were saying?" he prompted her, not wanting to get on the topic of what he was thinking about.
The pair was doing their Prefect duties, the typical rounds for the sixth years, wandering up, down and around the Transfiguration hall.
"Oh, I was just rambling about the Charms homework, that's all. No need to backtrack," Lily said with a wave of her hand, dismissing the subject.
Remus watched her as she looked around the hallway with interest. She had shocking green eyes that just mesmerized him.
"Every time I walk down this hall I see something different," she commented softly.
"Oh," Remus said with a grin, "there's always something unseen in each corridor. You just have to know where to look," he added sneakily.
This was very much unlike Remus, and he knew that, but James wasn't around and why not flirt "shamelessly" for a bit? Maybe she had an interest in him.
"What do you mean by that, Rems?" she asked, studying him as if he was replaced by some new, cloned, Remus.
(Author's Note: Uh, yeah, 'Rems' is pronounced "Ree-m-s" as weird as that looks. Kind of like "reams" as in "reams of paper." Got it? Okay, moving on, sorry to interrupt.
"You know, I probably shouldn't have said that," he said hastily, not wanting to get caught sharing the Marauder's Map with Evans. Merlin knew James had had his fantasies on that one.
Oh yes, James had his fantasies. Many of them were, how you say, graphic – ones you really shouldn't share with your dorm mates. But, at the insistence of Perverted Pinhead (another P.P., Remus thought sourly, I shall call him P.P. v. 2.0) – Sirius - he told the very colorful fantasies to the marauders. Peter, being the weird creepy one always wanted to hear about the fantasies – graphic ones, particularly – because he didn't have a sex life ("although if he did I'm sure he's taking notes," Sirius commented last week). Remus was forced into listening to the torturous fantasies because he was a) a "great pal" that is always there; b) he had been locked in the dormitory by Sirius and c) he had no escape. Sirius, well … Sirius was dirty and gross like that ("probably takes notes to use with his next fling," Peter said with much enthusiasm last week).
So what was James's fantasy involving the Marauder's Map? No, not Peter's idea (he squealed and scrambled towards the pillow on his bed, asking if James was dreaming about shagging their map – or had he done it all ready). It had been a rather interesting fantasy, in Remus's opinion.
"So," James had said rather dramatically as he sat on his knees, on the edge of his bed, telling the story to his suspenseful (and weird, perverted, and forced) audience, "we're walking down the hall and she presses me up against the wall, telling me to snog her then and there." James smiled at the memory.
"Then I get this marvelous idea," he continued, "and decide to show her that secret room off the fourth floor – where we were. You know, the one that's all bright but kind of small? The room behind the tapestry? Yeah … so anyway … I huskily tell her I know where we can be alone and she smiles all bad-girl-Evans at me and I pull back the tapestry. So she looks at me and asks, 'Are you trying to snog me behind a tapestry?' So, naturally, I laughed and told her to go in and then … well … you know what happens next," James finished with a sly grin.
"What happened next?" Peter asked eagerly.
The marauders turned to give Peter a blank look that said "YOU ARE SO STUPID," all gaping at his stupidity.
"To say the least," James had said with a bad-boy grin, "she couldn't keep her hands off of me."
Yes, Remus had felt that gut-wrenching feeling and wanted to smack James repeatedly across the head for being such an arrogant prat (as Lily had so kindly pointed out last year). But, no, he did not tell James about his feelings for Lily.
Had it been any other girl James would have stepped aside with a bow and allowed Remus to have her. But Remus just had a feeling that James wouldn't do that if he knew that he fancied Evans. If anything James would probably glare at him and turn away, declaring to never be his friend again and spread his Big Secret all over school.
But Remus had to realize that James wasn't like that.
James would probably feel a big pang of … well … pain at the idea of fancying the same girl as his friend, and then he'd probably stop courting Evans so often, not wanting to seem as if he was proving something to his pal. But, then again, when you thought about it, he'd probably try to get closer to Evans to prove that he was worth it – that she should choose him and not Remus – and also declare to Remus (with his actions) that Lily was his and only his – hands off, Remus, was the message.
"Tell me, Lupin," Lily declared icily, jerking him from his mental flashback.
"Pardon?"
"Don't use that one on me, Lupin," Lily said, a bit playfully (if he was hopeful enough o guess).
"No, I'm sorry, I really didn't hear you," he said apologetically.
Lily studied him in silence for a moment.
With a slow step towards him, she asked, "Are you sure you're feeling all right, Remus?" for the sixteenth time that night.
"I – uh – I'm fine," he stammered in response. He was very much aware of her being a foot away from him.
"You seem very distracted lately," she said softly, stepping forward another inch.
"I – I – uh," Remus said, now really aware of her close proximity.
"Is it me, Remus?" she asked, her eyes asking the question endlessly as they looked deep into his own.
"Its – its – uh – its," he stammered.
"Remus," Lily encouraged, daring to take another step forward.
"L-Lily," he stumbled, unsure of what was going to happen (although his radar was telling him something … interesting).
"Remus, are you sure you're okay?" she asked. He could feel her breath on his lips, she was so close. If he stepped forward another two inches he'd touch noses with her.
"I'm – I'm – er – that is to say, I – uh."
"Shh," Lily mumbled as her nose was just a centimeter from his.
Oh, Merlin, thought moment. THOUGHT MOMENT! MAJOR THOUGHT MOMENT!
So Evans did like him. So she really did fancy him. So she wanted him.
Remus's lips curled up into a smile at the idea, then, with a jolt, jabbed them back down to "normal" – James would die if Remus went out with Lily.
Remus could see her bright green eyes staring into his and he felt himself drift off into a happy senseless world. Lily Evans was going to kiss him.
As she tilted her head, her lips an inch from his, the Marauder's pact flitted through his head.
We declare dibs over girls. If we declare dibs then the one declaring dibs gets the dibs on that dibs-worthy girl. Dibs are dibs and if a Marauder fails to acknowledge the dibs, he will be severely punished for breaking the dibs rule by walking past the fellow Marauder's dibs.
As stupid as the pact had been, James's voice jumped into his head.
"I have dibs on Evans! She's mine! All – all – all – mine."
With a jump Remus put his hand over Lily's mouth, just a second before she kissed him. Her eyes widened in surprise and embarrassment. As he pulled his hand away from her mouth, she opened and closed her mouth, attempting to speak. But, before she said anything, he had to justify himself.
"I'm sorry, Lily," he whispered. "I like you a lot, and all, but James is one of my best mates and he really likes you. I couldn't hurt him like that, I'm sorry."
"I – I – uh." It was Lily's turn to stammer. "I'm sorry," she said finally.
"Please don't be sorry," Remus mumbled, not meeting her gaze. "I really don't want you to be sorry about that."
"Okay," Lily said with a small smile.
Remus cleared his throat, jerking his mind back to the pressing matter at hands. Or, well, the one that had just passed.
"I guess we should head back up to the tower," he said, playing with his tie anxiously.
Lily studied him for another second.
"Yeah, sure," she said, following him as he walked up the steps towards Gryffindor Tower.
"G'night, Remus," she said quietly when they reached the common room and departed for their own dormitories.
"'Night," he said, still lost in thought.
James would so kill him if he found out about that. Remus only prayed that he didn't have any Veritaserum on him.
XxXxXxX
"I think Moony's been snogging," Sirius declared in a high-pitched girly voice.
"Really mate?" James asked eagerly, jumping up in bed to look at his friend.
"Well," said Peter, striding over to where Remus stood. "I don't see any lipstick marks -"
That's cause Evans doesn't wear lipstick, Remus thought.
"- I don't see any ruffled hair -"
She hates that kind of thing.
"– I don't see anything that shows evidence of him snogging," Peter finished, dragging his plump white finger across Remus's cheekbone, as if checking for dust.
"That's cause I didn't kiss Evans," Remus grumbled.
His eyes widened in horror as he slapped his hand over his mouth, unable to believe that he'd actually said what he had been thinking.
James blinked.
"Pardon?" he asked.
"Nothing," Remus said … a bit too quickly.
"You didn't," James gulped, "kiss Evans?"
"N-no, mate, I didn't. I mean, she – she wanted to, but -"
"Evans wanted to kiss you?" James asked, his face blank, but obviously hurt.
"Look, Prongs, it didn't happen, so – so can we – can we forget it? Please?" Remus added lamely, trying his best to get off the topic.
"Yeah," James said quietly. "Yeah we can forget about it. I'm out of here," he said, ripping his Invisibility Cloak from his trunk and stormed out of the dormitory, throwing it over his shoulders, tucking the Marauders Map under his arm as he went.
XxXxXxX
"Lily calls me an arrogant toerag! Jinxing people left right and center! A popular big-headed Quidditch star too caught up in himself! A stupid Marauder always playing pranks! A stupid – little – toerag!"
James was furious. He was more than furious, actually. He was livid.
"Always saying that we Marauders were too arrogant to notice the rest of the world. She won't go out with me, no, when I ask her repeatedly and beg for her attention and do everything I do for her, but she'll go ahead and like Remus!"
Some would say he was a bit upset.
"I can't believe Moony would do this to me! His own friend and fellow Marauder! Peter, sure, he could do it to him; but me? Why me? Why did he have to be so bloody perfect and become a sodding Prefect? Why does Evans like him and not me? I can't believe he did that!"
Others would say he was confused.
"What's Moony got that I haven't? I've got a better body – more muscles – I'm taller, I've got handsomer-ly hair, I've got talent on the Quidditch pitch! I may not be as smart but I studied to become an Animagi! I've got skill!"
Then again, the twittering girls would call him jealous.
"Why does he get to kiss Evans? He hasn't been in love with her since first year. Hell, he doesn't even like my one-true-love. Why did Evans choose to kiss him? Why not me? Why waste a luxurious kiss on someone who doesn't even want it? She should have kissed me instead!"
Or … some could call him stupid.
"How did this happen? How was I stupid enough to not see it?"
FLASHBACK
"Hey – hey, guys," James whispered, giving Peter a sharp poke in the side, resulting in him dropping his ladle into the potion he was stirring.
"What's up Prongs?" Sirius asked, glad to have a reason to turn away from the potion.
"Look at Evans."
The four Marauders turned their heads to look at Lily Evans who was staring at them, her eyes round and interested, watching them with a small smile. Remus and James smiled at her, resulting in her blushing, turning back to her cauldron, feeling caught.
"She's staring at you mate," Peter squealed, jumping up and down like a retarded cheerleader, knocking his cauldron over in the process, yellow liquid pouring out over the desk with a splooooooosh.
"She was staring at me!" James exclaimed excitedly.
"Your luck just might be changing, Prongs," Sirius said with a pat to James's back before glancing in his mirror to check that his hair was in order.
"She was so totally checking me out."
END OF FLASHBACK
"I mean," James continued. "There were no signs. Like none at all. Not a single sign that she liked Remus."
FLASHBACK
"Could you please pass the marmalade, Remus?" Lily asked, glancing down the table to where the Marauders were sitting, all eating their food like pigs.
"Sure -" Remus began.
"Here you go, Evans, just like you asked for," James said, handing her the marmalade dish with a wink.
"Er – thanks, Potter," Lily said uneasily, glancing over at Remus. "How were classes today, Rems?" she asked.
"Fi -"
"They were absolutely perfect, Lily darling, especially with you as my subject," James said huskily.
"Oh – er – okay," Lily said, now a bit weirded-out. "Remus, do you think you could be a doll and hand me -"
"James Potter?" James asked, sliding down the bench to be right in front of her. "I'm the special today," he said seductively, posing himself like a ham on a platter.
"Er – no," she said, glancing back at Remus. "Could you hand me the carrots, please?"
"You mean this one?" James asked, before Remus could answer.
He had a carrot between his teeth.
"No, Potter," Lily growled. "The one up your arse."
END OF FLASHBACK
"It's just not possible. It's like she just totally decided to crush on Remus out of the blue. She has no reason to like him – she's shown no interest in him – none at all."
FLASHBACK
"Remus," Lily asked softly, leaning down on the desk in front of him on her elbows, "I was wondering if you could help me with my Defense Against the Dark Arts class work." She smiled playfully at him, resting her head in her hands. "It's awfully hard and I was hoping you'd be able to help me with it."
She was at such a pose that Remus, having looked forward at the sound of his name, was face-to-face with her boobs.
"I'd be glad to help you Evans," James said to her boobs.
"Thank you, Potter," Lily said icily, glaring at him. "But I'm not asking you for help, am I? I'm asking Remus … who's obviously a great deal smarter than you could ever hope to be."
"Sure, Lily, what would you like help -" Remus began, but obviously didn't get to finish.
"What's that supposed to mean?" James asked, hurt.
"It means I do not like you, Potter," she said, casting him one last evil glare. "Thank you, Remus," she said sweetly with a happy smile. "Could you help me on page 367? I'm not sure what they want you to write the essay about."
"Well, its simple, really … all you have to do is this," Remus said, telling her about the essay.
"Thanks a lot Remus," Lily purred as she picked up her book, ready to leave. "I don't think I'd've been able to do it without you."
END OF FLASHBACK
"How could Lily just spring this on me like this – so suddenly? It's not like she showed interest in him. She didn't even ask him out!"
FLASHBACK
"Hey, Remus?"
"Yes, Lily?"
"I was wondering if you wanted to go into Hogsmeade with me, like – you know – a date – or something," she said, blushing.
"I'd love to go, but I've got to stick with these blokes to make sure they don't blow up the alleyway. Again."
"Hey!" Sirius protested. "That was one time!"
"It was because you were stupid enough to ask what would happen if you set off an explosive in a flammable box in a small, cramped alley. And you decided to experiment and find out," Remus said with a snarl of unpleasant memories.
"Oh, alright," Lily said softly. "Maybe some other time."
END OF FLASHBACK
But James was very much in denial. Very, very, very much in denial. He was, actually, so much in denial that he hadn't really been watching where his feet were going. He was so wrapped up in denial, as if a denial-pastry-puff had eaten him alive, that he had walked straight into the library. Wow, denial was really going to ruin his rep.
Grumbling, he wound himself around the aisles and found comfort in the back corner of the Charms section.
"Remus … Evans … my fellow Marauder … the love of my life … betrayal … can't believe … him over me … disgusted … psh," James muttered evilly, unable to get the words out in proper sentences.
James glanced up with a sigh, tears threatening to drip out his eyes like an over-active runny-nose. He reached up towards the bookshelf and grabbed a sheet of parchment, a quill and some ink. When in pain, turn to writing.
A love so powerful
One so true
A heart so large
To care just for you
A passion that never dies
A rose that never wilts
I swear I'll never lie
You aren't mine
Not near my grasp
All I have is a simple rhyme
I dream of your kiss
When the moon comes up
I will always miss
You when you're gone
If I could I'd hold you
I would
Like I cradle my coffee cup
But the pain that stings my soul
Is to know you love another
I cannot play the role
The one as your lover
I will care for you
Even if fate takes you from me
I guarantee, although
That over your loss
I will fill with rue
One love
One passion
The wave that never stops
Even when it pounds
Against the rocks
When your eyes fill with tears
I will always be there
To wipe them away
With a tissue thin as sheer
My heart will throb with every kiss you give
I will feel the tears
When I see your happiness
As you walk through life
As you live
Without me
So go ahead and love another
But please always know
I will always love you
No matter what fate becomes
How low
My life seems to be
My tears will keep me company
The moon will shine bright
As I dream of you kissing me
The only dream I have to hold
As you walk off on your own
I will always love you
Please never forget
I will never let
My love for you
Ever die
XxXxXxX
James sighed as he looked down at his poem. The words were so true they really did sting his soul. He didn't want to think of Remus wandering off and snogging Lily in the broom closet. He didn't want to think of them holding hands as they walked down the halls together. He didn't want to imagine what life would hold over summer, going over to his house to see her and Remus together on the couch. He didn't want to think of anything that involved Lily and Remus because it really did make his eyes fill with tears. Thinking of Remus with Lily would probably bring the end of James's fate in death. He didn't really think he'd be able to live, if Remus and Lily went out.
He bit his lips to hold back tears and crumpled the paper up, tossing it on the cold stone floor. He sighed again and looked up at the ceiling, begging for some miracle.
What he really needed was a walk. He really, really, really needed to take a walk. Some fresh air to cool down his emotions and dry up his tears. He just had to get his mind off Lily.
He stood up and wrapped his cloak snug around his neck, glancing at the Marauder's Map, to make sure the coast was clear. He walked slowly out of the library, down the hall towards the Entrance Hall, out the doors and onto the grounds.
Wandering the grounds seemed like the best thing James could do. Breathing deeply, he took in the cool night's air. He sighed as he exhaled, trying his best to calm his emotions and convince himself that he still had a chance with Lily.
XxXxXxX
"Charms, Charms, Charms…. Ah! Charms!"
Lily was once again doing her Charms homework and, once again, she was in desperate need of a book to help her.
She ran her finger along the spines of the books, muttering the titles under her breath, looking for something that caught her eye. It wasn't the book that caught her eye – actually, nothing caught her eye; it caught her foot.
"Ahhh!" she squealed as she tripped over some spare bit of parchment, resulting in flying limbs and a very unhappy Lily Evans laying sprawled on the floor, aching with pain.
"Sodding parchment," she grumbled, sitting up and rubbing her back.
It wasn't that she was nosey. She just had to see what the bloody hell was up with the damn parchment that tripped her.
She picked up the crumpled piece of parchment and smoothed it out. She whispered the poem to herself.
After finishing the poem Lily positively wanted to cry. Who could be so cruel as to love another when their was someone who loved them with all their heart waiting for them? She looked down at the poem, shaking her head. This person was obviously blind. No one would be that cruel. The person who wrote the poem was in love … and the person loving another probably didn't know it.
She sighed and looked at the poem again. It was such a beautiful poem; it'd be a shame to throw it away.
She stuffed the poem in the pocket of her robes, grabbed the book she had been about to reach for before tripping and walked purposefully out of the library, towards her next class: Transfiguration.
XxXxXxX
James hadn't come back to the dorm until 4am that morning, and, judging by his silence, Remus was sure he was thoroughly pissed.
Remus chanced a glance down at his friend, who was determinedly taking notes, staring straight ahead at McGonagall as she talked about the lesson. Then, wondering where the problem was, glanced over to his right and saw Lily, hunched over a piece of parchment (not her notes), reading it with her group of giggling Gryffindor girls.
Remus furrowed his brow in curiosity, wondering what they were reading that could leave their eyes brimming with tears.
When McGonagall dismissed them at the end of the lesson, Remus wandered over to the group (who was still reading the parchment), with the Marauders behind him (he noticed James kept his distance).
"What've you got there, Evans?" Remus asked as he approached the group.
Lily glanced up and blushed at the sight of Remus.
"It's just this poem someone wrote that I found in the library … it's rather sweet."
If anyone had been smart enough to notice, they would have all seem James's ears perk at her words. He crept forward till he was right beside Remus and took a daring look at the parchment Lily was holding. His stomach turned over. It was his poem.
His head rung with her words.
"It's just this poem someone wrote that I found in the library … it's rather sweet."
He smiled to himself. She liked his poem.
"Really?" Remus asked.
"Yeah … makes you think a bit more about things," Lily said softly, glancing back at the poem.
James cleared his throat loudly, resulting in every head swiveling to look at him.
"Can I see that, please?" he asked Lily, looking at the parchment.
"Oh, sure," she replied, handing over the poem.
"Thank you," he said, pocketing it.
"Hey! That wasn't yours!" Lily protested.
"Actually," James said, his hazel eyes meeting her green ones, "this is mine, thank you very much."
He turned on his heel and walked quickly and purposefully towards his last class of the day. He had to get the point across to Lily that the poem was written about her, especially when she found it and he'd abandoned it.
XxXxXxX
Lily sat in the shadows of the large beech tree, her eyes closed, back up against the trunk, pondering every pondering-worthy detail she could ponder.
It wasn't possible that she was that cruel person who loved another and so blindly avoided the one who actually loved her. She couldn't be that person.
Every day that James Potter went after her, she was always sure that he just wanted her because he couldn't have her. It had to be that. It just had to be.
But reading his poem was some sort of 2-by-4 that really smacked her hard in the heart.
James Potter really was in love with her.
Being the smart little witch she was, she had copied the poem onto another piece of parchment, just in case some teacher saw it and confiscated it. Taking it out of her robes, she read the poem again.
A love so powerful
One so true
A heart so large
To care just for you
A passion that never dies
A rose that never wilts
I swear I'll never lie
You aren't mine
Not near my grasp
All I have is a simple rhyme
I dream of your kiss
When the moon comes up
I will always miss
You when you're gone
If I could I'd hold you
I would
Like I cradle my coffee cup
But the pain that stings my soul
Is to know you love another
I cannot play the role
The one as your lover
I will care for you
Even if fate takes you from me
I guarantee, although
That over your loss
I will fill with rue
One love
One passion
The wave that never stops
Even when it pounds
Against the rocks
When your eyes fill with tears
I will always be there
To wipe them away
With a tissue thin as sheer
My heart will throb with every kiss you give
I will feel the tears
When I see your happiness
As you walk through life
As you live
Without me
So go ahead and love another
But please always know
I will always love you
No matter what fate becomes
How low
My life seems to be
My tears will keep me company
The moon will shine bright
As I dream of you kissing me
The only dream I have to hold
As you walk off on your own
I will always love you
Please never forget
I will never let
My love for you
Ever die
She read the poem over and over again until her own piece of parchment was as wrinkled as a two-hundred-year-old man's face.
She sighed. It wasn't possible.
But, when she read the poem for the one-hundred-and-sixty-seventh time, she was absolutely sure it was possible.
Maybe she had been missing the signs, telling herself that she really didn't like Potter … but when she got down to details, she realized she really did love him. He was her one-true-love, and, like he'd said before, they were meant for each other.
If only she could find him and tell him … then it'd all be better … hopefully.
XxXxXxX
The one place that was just James's Place was a place that only James could find.
Or so he thought.
James was down on the fourth floor in a hidden room off by the statue of Erwin the Elf. The hidden room, was, indeed, the one that was hidden behind the tapestry, the very one he'd had dreams of snogging Lily – and doing much more – in.
It was a cozy room, in James's opinion. The room was about ten feet by ten feet, with a wooden door and brass knocker behind the tapestry as an entrance. The walls were wallpapered with Gryffindor colors (courtesy of James) and had plush chairs around in a circle, with a window – and window seat – that overlooked the Quidditch pitch. It was his heaven, and he really didn't know how it was no longer his own little secret.
"James?" a voice called from the other side of the room.
James gave a start. Lily.
He really didn't know how she'd found out about his room … but obviously she had. Maybe one of the Marauders squealed on him. Probably Remus, James thought savagely.
"Yeah?" he asked, pulling open the door to see Lily standing there, the tapestry touching her back.
"Can I come in?" she asked, looking around the room that was behind him.
"Uh … sure," James said, stepping back to let her pass.
She glanced around the room and settled down in one of the little maroon chairs, looking rather nervous.
"I'm sorry, James," Lily said quietly after a couple minutes of silence.
"What?" he asked, bewildered.
"I'm really sorry. I guess I just didn't know that you really – really liked me, is all."
James stared at her, slack-jawed, in shock.
"I think – I think I really do like you … I just didn't really realize it until – until I read that poem of yours…. I don't know if – if you still like me or not but – but I do – do sorta like you… and I'd like to have a – have a chance with – with you… if I could," she said to the silence.
"Lily," James said, and before she knew it he was crouched on the ground before her, holding her hands. "I have always loved you and I don't know the deal between you and Remus – but – but it kills me, thinking about it."
Lily gave a small smile, biting her lip, not wanting the tears that were threatening to erupt to come spilling down her cheek.
"That poem was really sweet you know," Lily murmured, looking down at her knees.
"I was just really upset, is all," James said, but couldn't help from grinning. "But thank you."
She smiled shyly back at him.
"Lily – I do like you – I like you a lot," he said, squeezing her hands to prove his point.
"I like you too, James," Lily said, still looking down at her knees.
The pair sat in silence for a minute or two, both lost in thought.
"Can I kiss you?"
"What?" Lily asked, glancing up to look James in the eye, her own eyes round like saucers.
"Can I kiss you?" James repeated, moving closer to her with every word.
"Why would you want to kiss me?" Lily asked, blushing.
"Because I've dreamt of it in my dreams … and right now … it's the best moment ever," James whispered, just inches from her face.
Lily gulped, but smiled all the same.
"So can I kiss you?" James asked, now growing a bit restless.
"Sure," Lily whispered, turning her head up to meet his.
They kissed.
They kissed long and passionately.
James felt the world slip out of view from him as he closed his eyes and crawled up on the chair with Lily to kiss her. Lily felt absolutely deaf to all other people in the world and was only aware of James's lips on hers … it was so romantic … and she couldn't believe she'd waited this long to kiss James … this long to love him.
When the pair finally needed room to breathe, they pulled apart and looked at each other, Lily blushing like a red tomato, turning the very color of her hair.
"Wow," James said softly, wiping Lily's lip gloss off his lips.
Lily gulped.
"Wow," she mimicked.
James grinned at her, still wondering when he was going to wake up from this marvelous dream.
"Hey – Lils?" James asked after a moment.
"Yeah?" she asked, still working through the question 'how' in her head.
"Go to Hogsmeade with me next weekend?"
She grinned at his question. Once again he was asking her out.
"I'd love to," she said, still smiling.
The two stared at each other, grinning like idiots until one o'clock in the morning when they both noticed that they should REALLY get going and head to their dorms.
"G'night, James," Lily said, tucking a lock of red hair behind her ear as she walked up the dormitory steps.
"G'night, Lils," James said as he made his own way up the boys' dormitory steps.
He was almost positive that this was just about the best night ever. One moment that he'd remember forever when he was old and married – to Lily, of course. One moment that would keep him company until the day he died.
THE END
Author's Ramblings: Sniff, sniff, blow nose, blow nose, sniff, sniff, tear, tear. Hahahaha … yeah … in my opinion the ending was lame. I wanted to end it on Remus's POV … but then I was like "that'll totally ruin the sodding moment." And THEN it would have to bounce back to Lily and James cause I'm weird like that … so that would have been VERY confusing. –Shakes head- But whatever.
I hope you all liked the story. I know it was, like, uber long. Sorry about that! Hey, technically this is only one chapter, so suck it up. I'm a writer and I actually liked this one-shot so I kept going. Actually, I was about six pages into it and I couldn't decide if I wanted it to end L/J or L/R. LOL. But, you see, I'm a dedicated L/J shipper and I just can't see Remus getting to keep Lily as his own. Besides, that'd cause too much conflict. I mean, conflict is fun to write … but a real bore.
Anyway … I tend to do this a lot. Where I have to talk and talk and talk and talk about my story … but I'll save you the details. Well … most of them anyway.
I spent about 20 hours total on this story … over the period of 3 days. I had writer's block for about 2 hours while writing this, and I was repeatedly banging my head against the table as I talked to my friends on AIM. LOL. I wrote just a bit over 6,000 words – so be proud of me, please. I spent the majority of the time writing this, actually, staring at the screen, practically drooling, my eyes glazing over, bored with it already.
The poem I wrote in here was a stupid throw-together one that I wrote quickly specifically for this Fan-Fic, but when I went back to re-read it, I realized it's very much close to the heart in many ways. If anyone liked the poem, PLEASE let me know. Oh, and the spaces got all messed up on it, so please dont think I can't edit my own work. obviously hates me. Damn them and their stupid editing. Gosh, they dont even allow asterisks.
Ninety percent of this story was brought to you by complete and utter boredom at eleven o'clock at night … I'm a nice little night owl and I had nothing better to do. I am also a fully dedicated Harry Potter person, so if you want a news update, JKR has commented that she plans on having HP7 finished by December of this year (2006) – YAY!
Oh, and the P.P. Head thing didn't really get a chance to shine in the limelight, much to my disgust. I couldn't find a place to put it, but if you read my future works, keep an eye out cause I'm SO TOTALLY putting it in there! LOL. I don't know … I found it funny.
And I do believe I've rambled enough. But it shows that you are either a) very, very bored and you just keep reading cause you have nothing better to do – or – b) a very loyal and dedicated reader. If you are a, b, c or any other letter in the alphabet, PLEASE … do the following.
Please … review!
I would (will) love you dearly if you did. Please and thank you. Oh, and please don't hit me for talking so damn much. LOL.