Title: I don't even want to know...

Summary: Jack walks in on someone in the shower and realizes that for once, having to push a button every 108 minutes isn't the oddest thing on the island.

Spoilers: 210 - "23rd Psalm", aka post-"the haircut"

Rating: R for gratuitous Sawyer nakedness

Legal Stuff: I don't own Lost or any of the characters herein, but oh the things I would do to some of them if I did...

Author's Note: I got the idea for this story when I read the scene in the fic Manhunt by Sawyer (a must-read for any SKaters) where Sawyer suddenly gets modest in front of Kate. This story is totally different, but I feel the need to acknowledge the writer that inspired me. Also, while this story does have a SKate slantif you aren't a huge fan of SKate don't let the first few paragraphs deter you. Anyone that knows me knows how I like to end my stories... evil laughter...

Jack entered the hatch and instinctively glanced to the countdown clock of doom. It flipped from 58 minutes to 57 and he just shook his head. He knew that, logically, the whole thing was a load of crap. Was he the only one with enough science classes in his education to realize that even if the entire island was made of C4 it wouldn't be enough to "destroy the world", as Locke so liked to put it? However, he did realize that the repetitive button pushing provided the island survivors with a task, routine, and the chance to feel like they were actually serving some purpose here. It was a kind of normalcy that the group sorely needed.

Jack paused his musings to look around the hatch, and found it unoccupied. He had expected to find Kate and Sawyer down there, but was more than a little relieved that he didn't. Why she was suddenly so fawning and attentive to the former village ass was beyond him. He had spent a fair amount of time trying to figure out where it had gone wrong between Kate and himself, after that kiss in the jungle had led to awkwardness and avoidance for a couple days. None of his rationalizations seemed wholly adequate, and so he simply gave up on trying to figure it out. As long as the now seemingly inseparable pair wasn't rubbing it in his face (because Sawyer would never do that…), he was well on his way to being ok with it.

At that last thought, Jack heard the sound of the shower turn on. It wasn't odd for someone to come down and use the shower, but it was odd for them to be quietly sneaking around before doing so. He walked towards the door to the showers, hoping to find some obvious sign of who the occupant was without having to stick his head in and ask. No such luck. As the sound of the water ceased he reached for the door handle, but before his hand made contact it was yanked back out of his reach. He almost ran smack into Sawyer, who was notably damp and wearing nothing but a towel loosely draped around his waist and held up with one hand. The satisfied smile that had been on the southerner's face became an even bigger smirk on recognition of the man he almost collided with.

"Doc." Sawyer greeted as he sauntered out the door and over to where his things had been placed next to his bed.

The confusion on Jack's face became even more profound as his eyes registered another figure at the far end of the showers. "Kate?"

"Jack."

He gaped at her in consternation.

"Would you please get me a towel." She muttered at him.

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A short while earlier…

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"Stop scratching." Kate commanded Sawyer.

"But it itches." He angrily replied. "I can feel all those little hair bits on my shoulder and the back of my neck. It's irritatin' as hell."

She rolled her eyes at him. During his haircut she had taken every precaution to keep the cut hair off his skin, especially around his wounded shoulder, and she'd done a good job of it. There was no hair there, but he had whined about it like a small child ever since they had returned to the hatch. "Then why don't you go take a shower. Jack'll be down here soon and he'll do your bandage after."

"Only if you promise not to use the words 'Jack', 'shower', and 'do' in the same sentence again." He smirked

Kate smiled and shoved him towards the shower door.

He stopped in the door frame and turned to her, "Freckles, you are smellin' a bit gamey. Sure you don't want to join me. Purely for hygiene sake."

"You sure do know how to flatter a girl." She quipped before giving him a shove and closing the door. He made some kind of reply, but it was muffled by the door. She went over and plopped unceremoniously on the couch. Dealing with Sawyer all day was proving to be draining.

As she had just started to drift off to sleep she was jarred awake be a familiar southern accent bellowing her name. She walked over to the showers where Sawyer stood behind the partially opened door. Without thinking she barged in and questioned, "What?"

He quickly jumped back from the door. He was still naked and found he had nothing to cover himself with, but his hands. "Son of a bitch!" he spat out as he started to blush.

Kate quickly took in the scene, and just as she was about to blush and embarrassedly turn away, she remembered who she was dealing with. "What, you've suddenly become modest? It's not like I haven't seen it before." She smirked.

"Yeah, well…" he muttered and found himself unable to finish the thought. Instead he just snapped, "Would ya get me a damned towel, woman."

"Excuse me?" she feigned being offended. He looked into her eyes and gave her a pleading look that, had it come from anyone else, would have been almost pitiable. She gave in and went to retrieve a towel. When she returned with it she had a huge grin on her face that almost frightened Sawyer. She stopped at the doorway, a couple paces from where Sawyer was standing still covering himself, and held up the towel as if to ask "Is this what you wanted?"

He shot her an impatient look. She tossed the towel at him. He reached up and caught it as it almost went sailing over his head. At that moment he froze, realizing that she had tricked him. He stood there with his arms still up over his head, now completely exposed, and locked eyes with her. She broke eye contact to do an exaggerated up and down scan of his body. When her eyes met his again she raised an eyebrow playfully and then turned to walk out the door.

She hadn't made it past the door frame before she felt his hand grasp her right wrist and pull her back into the shower. He spun her around to face him. He had draped the towel around his waist and was holding it up with the hand that wasn't latched onto her. When she looked at him, his eyes were a mix of emotions that she couldn't (or didn't want to) read, and that scared her a bit. Determined not to let him win this little game, she attempted to jerk her wrist out of his grasp. She didn't succeed in freeing herself, but the sharp movement did elicit a gasp of pain from Sawyer.

Kate suddenly realized that he was holding onto her with the hand attached to his injured shoulder. Worried that the jarring movement may have opened the wound, she quickly focused her attention on it. She braced his shoulder with her right hand (with his still attached to it) and began to gently probe the injury with her left. It didn't seem to be bleeding, but as her fingers grazed over a bruised area Sawyer let out a painful hiss. She immediately paused, and as she focused her attention there he put a hand on top of hers. The intimate contact made her shift her attention from the wound to his face. There was that look again. Was it coming from anyone else, it could have easily been a mix of vulnerability, hope, and fear. However, the foreignness of those sentiments to this visage made it difficult for Kate to read. She then felt a twinge of panic, wondering what emotions her eyes were betraying.

At that point Sawyer shifted his hand on her left one, such that he was now grasping both her wrists. The movement made her perceptive of their proximity. They still hadn't broken eye contact, but something about the previous thought made her feel like she was forgetting something. Then it came to her, both her wrists. Her eyes glanced down the miniscule gap between their bodies and instantly shot back up as she noted that the hand grasping her left wrist had indeed been the only thing holding his towel up, as it was now on the floor. A brief flash of fear shot through Kate and her muscles instinctively tensed to run.

This instant of recognition was not missed by Sawyer. He responded by letting the faintest traces of a smile pull at one corner of his mouth. It was just enough for Kate to relax ever so slightly. He took that as his opportunity to close the space between them. He slowly guided her backwards against the wall, never breaking eye contact.

Kate's heart was racing and she felt like she was gasping for air as her back hit the wall. She noted the stark contrast between the cold concrete on her back and the warm body pressed against her front side. He had her wrists pinned against the wall at about shoulder height and they just stayed that way for what seemed like the longest moment of Kate's life. He then lowered his head to where her neck met her shoulder. His hand released the wrist on that side and it began to snake its way down her arm as his lips barely brushed against the skin of her neck. She couldn't suppress the shiver that it caused, and that brought a smile to Sawyer's lips. His hand caressed its way down her side and paused momentarily at her hip before he removed it.

Sawyer suddenly moved his head to look her in the eyes. The smirk planted squarely on his face terrified Kate. In that instant her eyes widened and she realized what his free hand was doing. He bounded backwards, and before she could follow she was hit by a blast of cold water from the shower. All she could do was stand there and angrily gape at him as the shower drenched her and her clothes. She realized that he had probably planned this all along, from the moment he started whining about itching from the haircut. She fumed as he picked up the earlier discarded towel and ran it over his hair, no longer having any qualms about standing in front of her completely naked. He had played her. Bad. He was going to pay for this. She turned off the water as he wrapped the towel around his waist, shot her a smirk, and opened the door. It seemed to startle her more than him when, upon opening the door, he almost ran smack into Jack.

"Doc." Sawyer greeted as he sauntered out the door and over to where his things had been placed next to his bed.

Kate noticed the confusion on Jack's face became even more profound as he looked past where Sawyer had been standing and noticed her, "Kate?"

"Jack." She retorted. If there was one person on the island that she didn't want to have been behind that door it was certainly him.

He gaped at her in consternation.

"Would you please get me a towel." She muttered at him. She couldn't help but wonder what he was assuming had just happened in that shower.

Jack had obediently gotten her the towel she requested. As he walked over and handed it to her she opened her mouth to try to explain and he cut her off by raising a hand and shaking his head. As he shifted his gaze towards the floor she feared she was in for a lecture. When he looked up at her again she was shocked to see that he was laughing. "I don't even want to know." He chuckled and walked back out to the computer. For once, having to push a button every 108 minutes wasn't the oddest thing on the island.