I do not own the Batman Universe
"Puddin', do ya think I'm pretty?"
She always had a hard time asking him that, just incase he said no, that she was a hag. Not that her Mr.J would really mean it, he was probably just taking out his bad day out on her. After all, Bats was still flying around in gray spandex, that alone was reason enough for him to hit her over the head with a glass bottle of schnapps. She couldn't make eye contact with him ask she pushed out the words, which formed, awkwardly around her black-as-a-raven lips. So she picked a spot on the dirty rug, stained with blood, her blood, for doing something not quite perfectly. To her surprise though, The Joker let out a genuine laugh.
"Dollface, I don't think I'd put up with you if you weren't as hot as you are. Don't laugh Harley, it's not a joke. You may have once been a…doctor type thing-"
"Actually Mr.J, I was a clinical physiatrist," she interrupted brightly.
"Right, but this little…thing you have for me seems to have gotten your head a little muddled."
"Whaddya mean?" She asked, cocking her head to the left, eyes wide with genuine confusion. Again, her beloved Joker laughed.
"I mean my sweet, except to coast by on your looks, and your looks alone."
That set her off in a series of high-pitched giggles, as she launched herself at him. Before he could tell what was happening, his bowtie was halfway across the tiny room, and she was sucking on his pasty white neck, licking at the beads of sweat, and nipping at the corded sinew. He sighed, and let himself succumb to her selfless pleasuring, occasionally throwing her an "Ah," or a "Yes, Daddy likes that." It was all very entertaining to him really: He had her around his lilac gloved finger. Say something nice to her (nice by her standards, not by a sane person), and he'd reap the rewards, get what he wanted, what all men, crazy Clown Princes of Crime or not, wanted. So when she asked, "Puddin', do you think I'm sexy?" All he had to say was, "My sweet, I want to eat you up," bear her dimwitted, "But Puddin', that cannibalism," and the string would wind tighter.