Epilogue: Between Love and War

The next few days, Kaoru began to feel worse and worse about herself, and she didn't know why. She confided herself to her room and ate only when she needed to. She'd put on her beautiful kimono again, but now she felt that she was not pretty enough for it. It was binding and constricting to her gain of muscle, and with her hair short, she looked like a drag queen.

She preferred her night robe.

Kenshin was incredibly concerned about her. Something was definitely wrong, and he wanted to find out what, but he did not want to pry her for the answer.

"It's not right," Yahiko told him over a breakfast that Sano had joined. "She shouldn't be in there all day. She's finally home, so she should be enjoying hanging out with us and getting life back to normal, right?"

He had apparently returned to his normal complaining self.

"How many days has it been, eh?" Sano asked. "I think what, a week and a half?"

Kenshin stared at his bowl and shoved it away. "Sessha is going to do the laundry."

He left.

Yahiko smirked. "Poor rurouni is so upset, ne Sano?"

"Lovers are always worried when their loved ones act strangely. I guess Kaoru would have a bit of trouble adjusting, but she should quit this. She's upsetting Kenshin, and he doesn't deserve that," Sano said, snatching Kenshin's bowl.

"Yeah, and you don't deserve that food either," Yahiko scolded.

"Who are you, my mom?" Sano replied. "He's not gonna eat it."

"Stupid," Yahiko mumbled.

-

Kenshin walked around the corner towards the bucket of water but froze.

Kaoru sat alone on the porch, dressed in her kimono, and staring at the cherry blossoms. She looked horribly sad and lonely and drawn into herself. The wind blew their hair and clothing , and the blossom petals fell on them like pink flakes of snow.

"Kaoru…" He said wistfully as he approached.

"What is it?" She asked, and her voice sounded as empty as she looked.

"Sessha was going to ask you that," He told her, taking her hand and pulling her to her feet.

"I'm fine…" She replied, very unconvincingly.

"You can't lie to me," Kenshin said, giving her a half smile.

"It's just… I… well…" She threw her arms in the air and screamed. "I can't take it, Kenshin!"

"Take what?" He asked innocently.

"Me! I…" She looked at him and put her hands to her chest. "I don't know who I am anymore! I can't figure it out! Everything's changed so much that I just don't know anything! I can't even begin to figure out the mess with Shoji, and then there's all the stuff that's happened, and then there's me… I'm caught somewhere between Kahei and Kaoru, and I can't figure out which side I can go back to. Can you really change back into someone you changed from?"

"Kaoru."

"Oh, there's more!" She yelled. "Listen, I have a reason why too! I can't be Kaoru anymore because she was a pretty girl who practiced Kamiya Kasshin-ryu and cooked horrible food and stayed at home to care for her family, but now I'm not pretty anymore, and I can't get up to practice or cook, and I can't take care of you guys, and it's all because Kahei didn't do any of that! And then there's you, Kenshin! My heart keeps telling me that it was real, but my mind keeps telling me that you were pretending so you would make me happy, and I know that's what I told you to do but now… I'm just… I'm not sure…"

"Kaoru," Kenshin stepped closer and held her in his arms. "Sessha can't believe what you've just said. It's nonsense."

"Wh- It's not nonsense!" She retorted, pushing him back.

Kenshin chuckled. "Yes, it is… You see… He took her hands in his and kissed the top of them. "Kaoru is Kaoru. She has always been and always will be the beautiful girl who practiced Kamiya Kasshin-ryu, cooked horrible food, and stayed at home to care for her family. You can change what happens in your life, but you can never change who you are on the inside."

"…but…" She whispered, staring deeply into his amethyst eyes.

"As for me…" He leaned close to her ear and said in a low voice. "Sessha would never pretend about such a thing, Kaoru… Sessha would never have given himself to you if he did not feel the same way about this intelligent, incredibly beautiful, wonderfully gifted, incredibly brave, amazing in every way woman that he owes everything to."

"What are you trying to say?"

"Sessha loves you, Kaoru…"

"Oh… Kenshin…" She pressed her lips against his, and he giggled slightly.

"Don't cry now, Kaoru… Everything's going to be all right…"

This was a happy moment, so she shouldn't have been crying, but she was.

Yet, it was a different cry. These would be the last tears of loneliness she would ever cry. This was the end of it forever, for she'd found someone to share life with.

She knew that one day, he would probably leave her again to protect people or help out, and he would be gone, but she knew that he would always come back. A war may arise again, and he would have to go, but the next time, she would stay and wait for him and love him. Both of them now knew that they did not have to pick one or the other. They could meet in the middle and go from there, together.

Between love and war, they would never lose faith and always love one another until the day they were parted by death.

Fin

Woo! The end! Well, it's kind of bittersweet because now it's over, and I can't write on it anymore… That's okay though, since now I can start my next group of Kenshin stories and hopefully finish "Just Your Average Teenage Samurai" too. This is one of my very favorite stories, and I really love you guys for sticking with me until the very end. Wow… 176 pages and 24 chapters, a prologue and an epilogue later, and I can't believe it's finally done… Amazing… I hope you'll enjoy my next stories too, and I'm really glad if you enjoyed this one because I certainly enjoyed writing it for you. Thanks for reading.

Yahiko-chan