Spoilers: Colonial Day

A/N: This fic came about because of a deleted scene from '33' in which Six reveals that Baltar is thinking of what it would be like to have sex with Roslin (just wanted you all to know that my brain would never have gone in this direction of its own volition – that deleted scene warped my fragile mind!).

Trials Of A Chocoholic

By Socket

Roslin stares into empty space. Since she's started taking the Khamala, she has an unbearable craving for chocolate. She finds it odd, she's never had a particularly sweet tooth – Adar used to tease her about it, said it was how she kept her trim figure and he usually said it resentfully as he tucked into a muffin or doughnut.

It's her favourite part of the day: the wind-down from the pandemonium of business hours. She has some papers to sign and then she's finished for the day, so she can spare a moment to daydream. Laura envisions a sundae with four generous scoops of chocolate ice-cream, luscious cavalcades of chocolate sauce trickling tantalisingly down its sides, sprinkles of chocolate crown the top and she imagines a large silver spoon poised in her hand.

"Ma'am?" Billy's voice interrupts her fantasy.

"Yes?" she asks, putting her glasses back on and gazing over at her aide.

"You were thinking about chocolate again, weren't you?" he accuses.

Roslin grins. "As a matter of fact, I was!"

Billy nods. "You know, it's probably just as well there's a shortage… it's not good for you."

Baltar steps into the President's office, having just caught the end of their exchange. "Actually – it could be argued that chocolate is a vegetable," the scientist intercepts.

Roslin and Billy look at him. Laura was about to say something about him knocking before letting himself in, but finds herself intrigued instead. "A vegetable?" she says, her eyebrows rise questioningly.

He moves towards her desk. "Chocolate is derived from coco beans and beans are a vegetable. Sugar is derived from either sugar cane or sugar beets. Both of them are plants, which come under the vegetable category. Thus, chocolate is a vegetable."

Laura smirks and glances over at Billy. "See – I have it on good authority that my chocolate fantasies are perfectly healthy."

Baltar sits down opposite Roslin, he grins. "Fantasies?" He knows it's pubescent, but the idea of Laura Roslin having fantasies about chocolate makes him think about her covered in chocolate… which he can slowly lick off, inch by delicious inch of her body until…

"Dr. Baltar?" Roslin's husky voice cuts through his wandering mind.

He looks startled. "Yes?"

She's wearing that expression that he's getting accustomed to whenever she looks at him; quiet distaste.

"Nothing, you were just… drooling."

Baltar smiles zealously. "To go a step further, chocolate candy bars also contain milk which is dairy. So it can be argued that candy bars are a health food, thus chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit - so eat as many as you want."

"You're advocating junk food as a health option? Remind me not to put you in charge of the fleet's nutrition!" Laura teases.

Billy smirks, then gathers up some papers and stands. "I have to make some calls, please excuse me."

Billy leaves and Baltar gaze's steadily at Roslin, who looks expectantly, if not cautiously back at him.

After a long silence, Laura breaks it with. "Did you want something, Dr Baltar?"

"Yes, very much so," he replies, thinking of her long legs under the desk, that short skirt, tight, taut across her sinuous thighs…

There's another pause, in which he seems distracted. "Well?" Roslin prompts.

"Yes – I wanted to, uh… the thing is, Madame President – Laura."

Roslin musters all of her self-control not to cringe at his use of her first name. She hates that Baltar can call her by it and those who have truly earned the right to, like Captain Apollo and Adama, can't.

"I just stopped by to tell you, to let you know how much I appreciate this opportunity to work closely with your office and to give you every assurance of my loyalty."

"Thank you," Laura smiles politely, hoping this conversation will soon be over and he will leave. He might be a genius, but something about him disturbs her.

The blonde appears next to him. "She's not wearing anything under that skirt," Six assures him.

"Really?" Baltar exclaims.

"Yes, I really do appreciate your support," Roslin assures him.

Gaius nods at the President. "Good," he replies.

Six sits on his lap and drapes her arms about his neck. "Tell her about your chocolate supply, that might soften her up," the blonde runs her hands across his chest and down to the waistband of his trousers.

"Uh… ah…" Gaius whimpers.

Laura stares at him. "Doctor?"

"I'd just like to add, ah… Laura, that I have a supply of chocolate that I would be most… um, willing to share with you."

"Really? You have chocolate?" Laura exclaims, her interest in this conversation suddenly piqued. "What kind?"

Six kisses his neck, then bites at his flesh as an image of him moving between Roslin's thighs in a state of sexual ecstasy enters his head.

"Ow…" Baltar reacts, then smiles nervously at Roslin, he gently taps his neck. "A bite, must be a bug in here or something. Um, plain milk chocolate. And, as I said, happy to share. Meeting your needs is my top priority, as your vice-president. So, in the future – any urges or cravings that need to be met, don't hesitate to ask. I'm at your disposal."

Laura stares at Baltar and gives a hesitant nod of her head, saying. "I'll bear that in mind, Doctor."

Gaius nods, then stands-up quickly. "Thank you, Ma'am," he says gingerly, then turns and exits her office.

Roslin feels a warning shiver run down her spine. She doesn't trust him one inch but she needs his popularity on her team. She sighs as she remembers one of Adar's pearls of wisdom; "The world is full of crooks – just make sure the smart ones are on your side!"

Roslin enters Baltar's lab reluctantly. She can't believe its come to this; but sheer desperation has driven her to it. She's tried to hold-off the cravings but last night in her dream she'd had giant chocolate éclairs all with Baltar's face chasing her, calling out, "Laura! You know you want us. Give in, Laura!"

Baltar looks up from his desk and grins when he sees her. He jumps nervously to his feet. "Madame President? What a pleasant surprise!"

Laura smiles civilly, she turns to one of the guards on her protection detail. "We're not to be disturbed," she instructs him, then closes the hatch.

Baltar's mind races to all the wrong conclusions and he smiles… maybe, just maybe…

"Don't get any ideas, Gaius," the blonde whispers into his ear. "She only wants you for your chocolate."

Laura faces Baltar. "I was wondering if the chocolate offer was still open," she says bashfully.

"I'm happy to oblige," he answers them both and crosses the room, opening a drawer.

Six snakes her arms around his chest, her lips tease his earlobe as she says. "She doesn't want you Gaius… she doesn't even like you."

Laura watches him carefully. "I'm sorry to just drop in on you like this," she apologises.

"That doesn't matter," he says to Six, then looks at Roslin. "It's always a delight to see you, Madame President."

Gaius holds out three bars of chocolate to Laura and smiles, waiting for her to step forward and take them.

Roslin hesitates. She feels that, by the simple gesture of moving forward and taking the offered chocolate, she's committing herself to something more… it makes her uneasy. But then, she reminds herself that there are armed guards outside the room. All she has to do is shout and they'll burst through the hatch and annihilate the genius.

Baltar's arm remains extended and his eyes meet hers. "You can have all of it, if you like. It's top quality, made from rare coco beans, very rich and creamy, melts on the tongue."

Six traces his ear with her index finger. "She doesn't trust you, she knows what you're thinking… she knows what you want from her."

Laura steps closer. "When you put it that way, how can I resist?"

Baltar's smile widens as Roslin takes the chocolate, she sees a flicker in his eyes, she knows that look and with a firm grip on the silver-wrapped chocolate bars, Laura quickly draws back from him.

"I told you!" Six taunts, laughing at Roslin's reaction.

"No need to rub it in!" he yells irritably at the blonde.

Laura looks startled at this. "Rub what in?"

"Rush in - no need to rush in – we have all the time in the world!" he says lightly, then waves an arm in the air as if to illustrate his point.

"Are you alright?" Roslin asks, confused. Sometimes she feels like he's not talking to her at all, but some invisible force in the room.

"Oh, isn't that sweet! She's worried about you!" the Cylon teases. "She wouldn't be if she knew the things that went through your head when you looked at her legs!"

"Yes, just a little overtired, that's all," Gaius responds to Roslin.

Laura nods, eager to get out of the lab and away from her VP. "Thank you for the chocolate," she says and walks towards the exit.

"You're welcome," Baltar replies cheerfully and gives a little wave of his hand. "Bye-bye."

Laura exits the lab and shuts the hatch securely after her. She looks down at the chocolate bars in her hand - some things were worth suffering for.

The End