There were some gates that had a sign on them. The sign said, "New Lucky Smells Lumbermill," and it was made of chrome with gold letters. The gates were made of iron and looked Victorian. Inside was a large lumbermill facility. There was a sleeping quarters, lumbermill and offices. All looked like a modern complex. Compared to the old Lucky Smells Lumbermill, or even by normal standards, this place was magnificent. But, it was not the facility that got everyone's eye, it was who was waiting at the door.
The two people there had a definite aura of menace-that everyone could feel. As these two people were terrifying, I will refer to them as everyone else does, only as the women with hair but no beard, and the even more terrifying man with a beard but no hair.
"Olaf," the main with a beard but no hair said. Olaf said, "Hello, I have arrived, with all these wretched volunteers. Haha" "Good," they said, "Now we can destroy the Megatower and then steal every fortune in the world!" "This is absolutely vile," said Hector, "And as an adult volunteer, I will stand in your way." "Then this harpoon will pierce your heart! Haha!" said Count Olaf. "So be it," declared Hector. "I will give you ten seconds to change your wind," said Olaf. "Ten. Nine. Eight. Seven." "No," said Sunny. "Six," said Olaf. "Please do not kill this innocent," said Klaus. "Five," said Olaf. "Hector, consider how much you can do if you do not sacrifice yourself," said Duncan. "Four," said Olaf. "Please do not let Olaf slay, You Hector, not today," is the couplet Isadora then constructed in order to convince Hector not to die. "Three," said Olaf. "If you die nobly, nothing noble more will come of you," pointed out Violet. "Two," said Olaf. "Think about this," begged Quigley. "One," said Olaf. "Goodbye, children, I will miss you very much, but I can not not try to stop this evil man," said Hector. "Zero," said Olaf, "Boom." At the moment he pulled the trigger, the light flashed red and one harpoon came out of it, leaving three more.
It seemed everything was in slow motion. It seemed the next few seconds took a few hours apiece. The harpoon punctured Hector's chest. He coiled back in pain. The harpoon passed through and soon the end of it came out his back. Hector gasped, then staggered to the ground like a sack of potatoes-the expression, "sack of potatoes" here means he simply fell quickly, having nothing to do with a vegetable of any sort, nor a bag of any sort. His crumpled body hit the ground. However, the now bloodied harpoon kept sailing. Everyone looked at it and noticed that it was aiming straight at the woman with hair but no beard and the man with a beard but no hair. They looked shocked. Olaf looked surprised. The orphans looked flabbergasted-the word "flabbergasted" hear means "surprised and shocked"-. The harpoon then punctured them too. The harpoon continued to sail through the gate to the lumbermill. However, the two extremely villainous people could not fit through bars, so they slammed against it with such force that it stopped the harpoon and rattled the gate. The hung there, dead, on the wall.
"Haha! My plan worked! Haha!" "What plan, you sickening animal?" inquired Klaus. "To kill three people I hated at once! Haha!" was the reply. "But why do you hate those accomplishes of yours?" asked Violet. "Haha! They thought they were better than me, trying to scare me with that aura of menace! Haha! I am the greatest villain, arsonist and murderer in the world! Haha!" "Shouldn't be proud," commented Sunny. "Haha! A stupid baby trying to correct me! Haha! What funniness! Haha! Go back to the zoo where all babies come from! Haha! The only one greater than me is The Godfather." "The Godfather?" wondered Duncan. "Haha! Too stupid to know about the Godfather! Haha! He is not a mafia Godfather, but the leader of every villain in the world! Haha! Except everyone else has betrayed me, including those freaks over there! Haha!" Olaf pointed to the two corpses on the gate. "Haha! Now we will go visit Mr. Ixi- Sir. Haha! Disagree and did! Haha!" He then ripped the harpoon out of the gate and threw it away, making the two corpses fall. He then opened the gate.
Everyone headed to the offices. Olaf banged on the door and then the door opened. A man with a cloud of smoke covering his head due to the cigar he was smoking opened the door. "I'm not an idiot!" he said. This is far from a normal greeting, but seeing how this man was not other than Sir, it didn't make anyone surprised. "So, you survived the fire," said Olaf. "I'm not an idiot," roared Sir, "Of course I did, or else I would be dead! I was one of the few." "What happened, exactly?" asked Count Olaf. "Well, we all rushed around, but I smelled smoke-I love that smell of burning wood. But I wasn't in the sauna, so I knew the hotel was burning. I ripped of my blindfold and told Charles to too. He didn't and started rambling on about it's not right. I told him the hotel was burning, but the idiot didn't do anything. So I ran out. However, once outside I saw those two folks with the aura of menace closing the doors. Only me, them, one of the Denouements and that Vice Principal with the awful music-playing skills, and that banana-eating freak and story-telling geek escaped. Fortunately, he kept playing, so the man with a beard but no hair drowned him in the bond. Then the one who ate bananas complained and was drowned. Then that other one said, 'One day I went to a hotel. It burned down. My friends were drowned. The end.' He was drowned for being annoying too. Then a taxi came around and said, 'Where's my vice and my teachers.' The man with a beard but no hair said, 'We drowned them because they are so annoying.' The Principal seemed modestly surprised, then nodded. Then he left and said, 'I am going to my submarine.' After that I went to the city's Lumber Convention that was on that week. Lucky Smells made no less than fifty million dollars, so now I moved out of dilapidated Paltryville and into beautiful Paltrydale. Now I'm rich and still not an idiot and I have a huge forest to harvest and I can give my staff wages instead of coupons. The only disadvantage is I have no Charles or assistant to boss around, and I have to make my own milkshakes. And that's my story which is true and I would know because I was there and I'm not an idiot." "Ah," said Olaf.
Bewildered at this story, the orphans wondered why Olaf was here. "Give me your boat," said Olaf. "No," said Sir. "I will harpoon you," said Olaf. "Okay, fine, there it is." He pointed to a huge boat made of wood with the words "Lucky Smells Lumbermill" written on it. It was on a small stream. Olaf said, "Okay, everyone on it-if you're an orphan! Haha!" Everyone climbed aboard, fearing death. They went down the stream. "Haha! In an hour we will be back at the Sky Olaf, where we will go to the ocean from, carrying the Surface Olaf, this boat. Then we will find Kit Snicket and the Widdershins and then destroy them and then go to the Megatower. Haha! I shall rule the world! Haha!" "Actually," Quigley the cartographer said, "It will take two hours to reach the Sky Olaf, due to me knowing my research." An spasm of anger crossed Count Olaf's face. Then his eyes grew very, very shiny. "Is that so? Haha! No one makes a fool of me and lives to tell the tale! Haha!" Then he did an extremely ruthless thing and pulled out his knife. He plunged it into Quigley and then threw him over the side of the boat into the creek. Everyone gasped. Then Violet shed a tear and everyone followed suit-if you recall from The Austere Academy, which I sincerely hope you have not read, the phrase "followed suit" has nothing to do with walking behind a matching set of clothing, instead meaning just doing something someone else does-and cried as well.
The whole journey they cried and cried and cried until they finally reached the Sky Olaf two hours later, and still they cried.