Bloodstained Eyes
Prelude V
It wasn't because she didn't feel like going. It was just that she didn't want to go. She didn't blame herself or anyone else because of her newly lack of attendance. She didn't blame herself or anyone else that she acted this way, her fresh discovery of careless acts…
Well… on second thought, she did.
School had started weeks ago and they had arrived in this new home at least last week and she was to attend to her new school the second day they had moved in this place. But she didn't give a shit at all.
Another morning came, ready to spark a new life down the soiled grassy earth. It's not that she was also lazy, it's the fact that she didn't want to admit that she had became one. Her white window curtain clung untouched on the carpet floor beside her bed, and she wasn't able to put it up around her window yet.
And she should've. The blinding morning light shot through her closed eye like lasers, making her cringe and turn over to her stomach, stuffing her pale face unto her massive feather pillow. She moved her left arms around behind her in search for a cover and realized she had kicked her thick feather blanket off the bed.
Groaning angrily, she turned over to her back and risked her morning facing her ceiling with an arm draped over her forehead, shielding her view from the daybreak light. She blinked a couple of times, trying to reduce her chance of falling back to sleep. A little thought crept up inside her, making her wonder to decide;
Maybe I should go to school…
The strange terrified feeling that clung to her chest last week had nearly disappeared and the times her heart beat unexpectedly throbbed rapidly were lessening. Furthermore, the feeling of calmness and tranquility seemed to coat over the odd feeling of peril and danger she had always felt after her occurrences.
Without much decisions, and wanting to finally avoid to boredom of doing nothing but wander around this new city she had moved in, Hiromi gradually sat up at the foot of her bed and kicked the soft blanket off her feet's way and kicked them under her bed.
She headed straight to the bathroom, with a towel and her under garments, and lazily remained in the bathroom for at least an hour, disregarded the fact that she was at least two hours late for school.
At least I'll be going to school; she scolded herself, and added with a frown as she let the warm shower water drenched her soapy unclothed pale skin, and make sure Maachinai won't get too upset. Just because I was a smart-ass before doesn't mean I can be one forever.
Snorting angrily and turning off the shower, Hiromi stepped off the shower area and grabbed her towel, drying her chocolate hair tediously. She was pleased to have moved into a pretty big three-floored house. Maachinai was not rich, although not yet, but they could easily afford as many things they wanted if needed or wanted greatly.
Sluggishly, she headed straight towards the medicine cabinet and stared at herself in the large mirror. There was a strange stab in her bosom, a stab she often felt every time she was alone or somewhere quiet and isolated. It was a feeling she had first felt after her accident, a feeling she hated so dearly.
Staring at the disheveled form of a pale skinned girl with rumpled moist chestnut locks, strands hugging tightly on her cheeks and shoulders, Hiromi glared at herself, refusing to stare at the pair of things she used for sight.
What I want…
She moved a hand up and brushed the strands of wet hair that clung over her right eyes with frail fingers and glared at her self. She stared at her curves and glared once more.
Maachinai and I can get what we want. She can buy what she needs, I can get what I need from her…
The towel she had placed over her head loosely slid off from her back and unto the floor. More strands invaded her sights, but she did nothing about it.
But…
She raised her hands up in the air and—
CRACK
No one… no one!
She pulled her arms back once more and swung them hard towards the looking glass, creating large cracks from that spot her curled hands had blew. Right where her face, mostly of where her eyes, were reflected.
She didn't cry, only screamed. Maachinai wasn't home, she knew that. The woman must've probably been looking for another job again. Hiromi narrowed her eyes and stared at the reflections of her eyes, which were merely two large cracks shattered like a spider's web, halting at the edges of the frame. She couldn't see her face, and she liked that. She preferred that, much, much better.
No one…
Gathering back to her consciousness, Hiromi picked up her towel and wrapped it tightly around her torso. She slowly picked her feet up and headed out the bathroom door, ignoring the act of her careless deed at the mirror, hoping that Maachinai can replaced that large broken mirror… again.
Sighing, she entered her bedroom and headed straight towards her closet, snatching whatever her hands grabbed; a pair of short bleached blue jeans skirt and a pair of long white stockings. She settled for a large white sweater that nearly reached the hems of her skirts, the massive sleeves that were enough to act as her scarf around her neck.
She didn't bother looking at herself in her looking mirror, except for the piece where she needed to put on her black contacts and her bracelets and watch. When she checked the time, she had only fifty minutes left before the school lunch would start. She marched downstairs, and went to the phone counter and called in a cab.
Walking and dressed this fancy for at least half an hour was going to wear out her below-knee white boots. Remembering her white shoulder bag, she marched back upstairs, patient to snatch it, along with her needed books Maachinai had bought her.
Everyone's got a wish they want…Everyone's got a desire they desperately need.
She quietly waited outside the front porch, sitting on a stool Maachinai had placed outside near the front door, with her pale hands in between her legs. She moved her lowly bowed head to gaze at the sight before her.
Despite that they now lived in Tokyo, their home was built at the grassland side of the city, moreover at the edge where they were near empty grass prairies and areas of woods. She had to admit she was slowly admiring the place they had moved in.
Sometimes, a desire can come true… and you call that fortune or a chance of good life. But… sometimes it takes a while to have a wish fulfilled. And I guess patience is one thing it needs to accomplish.
The cab arrived soon afterwards. She lazily got up and designated towards the vehicle and told the driver where to go.
"Daikaru?" the driver questioned. "Aren't you a bit late, miss?"
She gave him a glare and gradually turned her head to stare out the window.
"Just drive," she stated.
The driver scowled at her impolite tone and started the vehicle.
I think to myself… 'why do people make things so hard on simple little things?'… I answer to myself… 'because.' That's it.
I don't really know how to answer that. It's difficult to put it in words. Nor with actions.
No one… no one…
Hiromi clenched her fists on her lap and softly place the side of her forehead against the car window, gazing at the city's view with half-lidded eyes. The drive through school was extremely quiet; that she could only hear her heart beat as it blended in with the frantic noises outside the cab vehicle.
Maachinai and I can get what we want if it needed really bad. She can get what she wants… of course she can.
Maachinai wants to own a bakery shop. I wanted her to own one…
We both did.
But… what I want… what I really wish… what I really desire the most other than those greedy things other people needed… it's different.
She closed her eyes, getting adapted to her contacts for today, and pursed her lips.
What I want… no one…no one…
What I want… no one can ever make, give, do, or accomplish to or for me. What I want… even I can't get.
The drive through her school was, indeed, silent and uncomfortable.