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Chapter 5

Susan was giving instructions to Chuny for one of her patients. Once Chuny left Luka spotted his chance to talk to her. She was starting to walk away when he called her name.

"What?" she said turning around, not too pleased to find that it was Luka who was calling her.

"I was wondering how Sam is," he said walking over to her.

"You were wondering how Sam was and decided to ask me? Why should I know?"

"You were there last night, I figured you'd know" he answered.

"I was there last night, I was there with Sam this morning and I was the one who held her hand when she had the ultrasound. The question that needs to be asked is where were you?" Susan said happily venting her anger at Luka for leaving Sam like that.

"We had a bad argument, I didn't think she'd want to see me."

"Bull shit Luka, you should have been there and you know it."

"There were two people in that argument, Sam was the one who wanted to leave. I just did the leaving for her." Luka said through gritted teeth. The last thing he wanted was for all of the ER to hear their discussion.

"Maybe she did want to leave but you didn't have to leave her alone in a hospital bed! There's a time and a place for leaving someone." Susan half yelled, she didn't care who heard but for Sam's sake she didn't want to make too big a scene.

"Don't you think I was hurting too?"
"You could of at least had the courtesy to go and see her this morning if that was the case."

"I had to work." Luka said knowing how pathetic he sounded.

"I'm your boss, I would have understood." Susan answered.

"Can't you just tell me how she is?" he pleaded.

"It's not me you should be asking."

Luka decided to give up then, he knew that Susan wasn't going to cave. Ever since he saw her leave the hospital six hours ago he hadn't been able to get her out of his mind. He was worried about her, was she ok? He just couldn't bring himself to call Sam, he was afraid of the reception he would get. Although, more than that he just wasn't ready to hear that she had had a miscarriage, not yet anyway. He was sure she had lost the baby, he just had a gut feeling.

Sam was sitting on the couch in Carter's living room, there were boxes everywhere. Her and Alex had managed to pack all of their belongings in record time, although given the amount of times they had moved it wasn't too surprising. Alex was outside with Carter showing off his soccer skills or something, she knew that she should go and rescue Carter but she just didn't have the energy. She just hoped he was able to cope, Alex could be a bit overwhelming at times, especially if you didn't really know him.

She stared at her cell phone which was on the coffee table in front of her. Luka still hadn't called, it was so unlike him. She had really blown it this time, she sighed. She could do this without him, she raised Alex, didn't she?

It hurt so much. She had never let herself love someone so completely until Luka, and losing him just hurt almost more than she could bear. Sam put her hand protectively on her stomach, from now on her children would be the most important thing and she would never again let some guy mess up her life.

As she was thinking this Carter came in and flopped down on the couch beside her. He looked exhausted.

"Are you ok?" Sam asked him.

"Where does your son get all of his energy from?" Carter asked.

"His an eleven year old boy, they're all hyper like that."

"How do you do it? Be a single mother to a hyper eleven year old boy I mean"

"It's not so bad, he's a lot calmer then when he was a toddler, believe me"

"I have a new found respect for you." Carter gushed.

"He's not that bad, you get used to him" she said feeling a little defensive of her son.

"I hope so! He makes me feel old."

Sam just laughed at him. "How do you think he makes me feel? I'm his mother! I have a son who's eleven, that makes me feel old."

"You don't look old though." Carter said. "You ok with everything?" he asked.

"I'll live."

"I'm here if you need me, don't be afraid if you need anything."
"You've already done enough in letting us stay here. Speaking of which, what do you feel like having for dinner, I'll cook. My own personal thank you."

"I'm not letting you cook me dinner, you have to rest, doctor's orders."

Sam smiled at him. "You remind me a lot of Mike, he's my older brother."

"Is that a good thing?" Carter questioned.

"Yeah, it is. He's a great guy, I miss him a lot. He always knew just how to make me feel better."

"You don't talk to him anymore?"

"No, I lost contact after I moved for the first time. He was away at the time so I never got to say goodbye. I tried writing to him but he never wrote back, my mother probably threw the letter out before he could read it. She never forgave me for getting pregnant at 15."

"That must have been tough. I lost my brother when I was younger, he died of cancer."

"I'm sorry" Sam said sympathetically.

They sat in silence and Carter put the TV on. Sam felt so comfortable with him. He was so much more open with her than Luka ever was. With Carter she knew that he would never hide from her, it was just a pity she couldn't get that from the man she loved.

Abby stormed into the doctor's lounge and slammed the door behind her. Susan jumped at the noise.

"What's with the door slamming?" she asked hesitatingly. She was having her first break after working five hours straight, she really didn't need another problem to solve. She had been going around fixing up Morris' mess all day.

"It's Luka, he's being a right bastard today" Abby said.

"I'm going to kill him, I really am." Susan fumed. "I've been receiving complaints all day, he almost got as much complaints as Morris."

"What's up with him? Did he have a fight with Sam?"

"Yeah, he stayed in a hotel last night. Of course, you heard none of this from me and you're not to go gossiping."

"I won't," Abby promised. "What are you going to do about him?"

Susan didn't get the chance to answer her, Luka was the next person into the lounge. And he also took his anger out on the door. He took one look at the two women before making his way to the coffee machine. Abby raised her eyebrows at Susan, which was her way of silently saying, 'well, do something'.

Susan shook her head, it looked like she was going to get her break after all. She went over to Luka, and Abby fled the room before the fireworks went off.

"Luka, I think you should go home and take the rest of the day off" Susan said.

"I'm fine, you don't have to do that." He answered.

"Yeah, I do. I'm having way too many complaints against you today, go home. And that's an order."

Luka didn't say anything, he just went to his locker and grabbed his things and went out the door.

Susan breathed a sigh of relief. She hoped he was in a better mood tomorrow. She could hear Morris arguing with someone outside and really wished she could just hide in her locker. She was seriously considering it, but she realised that it would never work. There was no way in hell she'd fit!

Alex walked into the living room looking for his mother.

"Mom?" he cried.

"Shh!" Carter whispered and pointed to the figure beside him.

Alex walked over and saw that his mother was asleep on the couch, Carter had covered her with a blanker.

"What did you want?" Carter asked Alex.

"I was just wondering about dinner."

"I could order pizza" Carter offered.

"Sounds good. Could I ask you for a favour?" Alex asked.

"That depends, what do you want me to do?"

"It's my mom's birthday the day after tomorrow. Luka was supposed to bring me out so I could get her a present, but I don't think he'll be doing that."

"And you were wondering if I would take you?"

"Well I can't ask my mom to! Will you?" Alex asked, a pleading tone in his voice.

"Yeah, that should be ok. I'll just have to check with your mother first, I'll tell her we're going to the park or something."

"Cool. Are you going to order the pizza soon?"

"I'll go do it now," Carter said getting up from the couch. "Just don't wake Sam, she needs her rest."

"OK, I won't" Alex said while settling himself down where Carter had been sitting.

When Carter was gone Alex fixed the blanket on his mother so that she was nice and warm. Then he turned his attention to the TV, he found ESPN and watched skateboarding. He kept the volume on low though, looking at his mom briefly to make sure he hadn't woken her.

Luka made it to the apartment and opened the door. He could tell right away that Sam had been and had taken all of her stuff. The place seemed so empty now, he already missed having her around. He even missed Alex's mess.

He went into the kitchen and found a note from Sam saying that she had left and was staying at Carter's until she found her own place.

He had been hungry, but now his appetite was gone. He noticed that the note was tear stained. He left it on the table, the last thing of hers in the apartment, he didn't want to part with it.

He made his way to the bedroom. He was so tired, once in the room he lay down on the bed. He knew he wouldn't be able to get much sleep. Not without her beside him where he knew she should have been. He turned his head to look at her side of the bed and that's when he noticed the envelope on the pillow. He picked it up and looked at it. When he saw what it was he couldn't stop himself from crying.

It was a picture of his baby, the one he thought was dead. It was from the scan Sam had had that morning. Underneath the picture Sam had written, 'Baby girl Taggart-Kovac"

This time the tears were tears of joy as he realised that his baby wasn't dead after all.