A/N: Well, this is my update. Hey, I finally have nothing to say.

Ruthy, VenusAdonis, charmedchick4eva, shanfan and Dark Halliwell.. you guys are awesome! thank you sooo much for reviewing.

Chapter Eight: Top of the World

•••••

Prue walked in the kitchen after she got home from work that evening to find Piper chopping up vegetables, her back to Prue. She turned around and picked up a tomato sitting by the stove. She looked up and caught sight of Prue, standing in the doorway. Anger flashed in her eyes and the smile quickly fell from Prue's face.

"What's going on?" Prue asked.

"How could you?" Her voice was cold, and her eyes threatening.

"Could I what?"

"Sleep with Phoebe's boyfriend?"

Prue's eyes widened in horror. Oh no. Oh no. She knows. How does she know? She can't know. This is just a bad dream. Everything's going to be fine when you wake up.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Piper said when she received no response. Prue stared blankly at her sister for a few moments. "Well" Piper added, obviously annoyed with her sister.

"I wasn't."

"Phoebe's upstairs crying her eyes out right now because of what you did."

"I-"

"You bitch. How could you do this to her?" She immediately regretted her choice of words, but didn't bother to correct herself.

"I don't know." Prue said and quickly walked out of the kitchen, in an attempt to run away from the pain she had caused both of her sisters. She ran to the front door and grabbed her purse and car keys. She heard footsteps run up behind her as she opened the front door.

"Prue, wait." She turned around and saw Piper standing in the foyer, just a few feet away from her. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it."

"Yeah you did. And you were right." She said and turned away from Piper and walked out the door. Piper ran out the doorway and followed after her sister.

"Prue, please. Don't leave."

Phoebe watched from a window in the attic as Prue walked out and got into her car, ignoring her sisters pleas. The engine to the BMW roared up and Prue backed out of the driveway and sped down the street. Piper watched Prue go as a few tears slid down her cheeks.

Phoebe backed away from the window and walked out of the attic and back into her bedroom. She had gone up to the attic earlier in an attempt to stop thinking about Prue and her boyfriend sleeping together. Being her bedroom reminded her of the nights he had spent there. She had hoped that since he hadn't ever been in the attic, she wouldn't think about him. But instead she thought about Prue betraying her.

She got to her bedroom and stood in the doorframe. She looked around and sighed. After crying for hours on end, she was drained. Emotionally and physically. She turned around and went downstairs and into the kitchen. She plopped down into one of the kitchen chairs and folded her arms on the table. She rested her forehead on them and Piper walked into the room.

"Hey, sweetie." Piper said as she walked over to Phoebe. Phoebe sat up to look at Piper. "Do you want me to fix you anything to eat"

Phoebe shook her head. "I'm not really hungry. Actually, thinking about food is making me a little nauseous."

"Ok. But if you want anything later, just let me know and I'll be happy to make it for you." She added with a smile.

"Thanks, Piper." Phoebe said and attempted a half-smile.

"Do you want anything else? Something to drink?" Piper asked as she put her hand on Phoebe's arm.

"No thanks."

"Okay." Piper watched as Phoebe's eyes wandered aimlessly around the room, eventually settling on the top of the table. "Do you want to do anything? Get out of the house, go see a movie?"

"Tempting, but I'm not really up for it." Phoebe said, her gaze never leaving the table.

"Of course you're not. I don't know what I was thinking." Piper said, inwardly cursing her stupidity.

Phoebe looked up at her sister. She could tell Piper was upset with herself. "Piper, it's okay. I know you just want to help. And that means a lot to me." She again gave a smile, hoping it would help Piper to relax.

"Well, I'm going to cook something anyways. I don't really have anything else to do. How about chocolate chip cookies? You love those."

"Those do kinda sound yummy." Phoebe said as she noted the growling in her stomach. "Probably should eat something."

"Chocolate chip cookies it is then." Piper said and smiled as she started getting out the ingredients. As Phoebe's attention returned to the kitchen table, Piper started humming a song. Phoebe recognized it instantly. It was one she'd heard just a few days ago in Prue's car.

•••••

Prue opened the door of her hotel room to be hit with the strong stench of cigarettes. She closed the door behind her and quickly locked it. She dropped her keys and purse on the lone table and then walked over to an armchair and sat down.

I wished I was smarter, I wished I was stronger
I wished I loved Jesus the way my wife does

She gripped the bottle tightly as she twisted off the lid. She threw it somewhere behind her and stared at the rim of the bottle as a few tears rolled down her cheeks.

I wished it had been easier, instead of any longer
I wished I could've stood where you would've been proud
But that won't happen now, that won't happen now

She put the bottle to her lips and drank down a sip of whiskey. She pulled it away and rested it on her leg as more tears began to fall.

I don't have to answer any of these questions
Don't have no God to teach me no lessons

She sat the half-empty bottle down on the table and glanced around the room. It was dimly lit, one bed, one chair, one table. No television or radio. No decorations. Nothing. Just her. Her and her thoughts.

This is what I've sunk to. This is what I deserve. After what I put her through, I don't even deserve this much. Tears streamed down her face as she continued to inwardly berate herself. The pain became too much to bear and she felt her knees weaken and her body fall to the floor.

I wished I'd a known you, wish I'd a shown you
All of the things I was on the inside

Uncontrollable sobs shook her body as she clawed at the carpeting. Thoughts kept rushing through her head. I don't deserve this. I don't deserve to live. No one wants me. No one needs me. The only people that ever mattered hate me now. All because of what I did. I fucked everything up and there's nothing I can do to fix it.

I come home in the evening, sit in my chair
One night they called me for supper, but I never got up
I stayed right there in my chair

She pushed herself up and turned towards her purse on the table. She grabbed her wallet and pulled out her library card. On the back, she had taped the razorblade. The day before she had become increasingly worried about someone discovering the blade. She had put it in her purse knowing no one needed her library card but her.

She pulled the tape off and tore the razorblade out of its hiding place. She pushed up her sleeve and saw the day old cuts. Angry, she shoved down her sleeve and jogged into the bathroom with the razorblade in her hand. She sat down on the toilet and put both of her feet on the wall in front of her. She pulled up her pant legs and quickly began tearing at the unmarked flesh.

There's a whole lot of singing that's never gonna be heard
Disappearing every day without so much as a word somehow

After covering both of her upper thighs with cuts, she finally felt slightly better. Not great, but good enough. She stopped the bleeding and stood up. She instantly was greeted with an intense wave of dizzyness and grabbed the wall to steady herself.

Think I broke the wings off that little songbird
She's never gonna fly to the top of the world right now

She stared at the picture of her, Phoebe and Piper in her wallet. She traced Phoebe's smile as she stood smashed in between her sisters. The photo was a little more than a year old, but the memory now seemed so far away to Prue. It's never going to be the way it was. She sat down her wallet and walked over to the bed. She lied down and quickly drifted into a deep sleep.

Cause everyone's singing, we just wanna be heard
Disappearing everyday without so much as a word somehow

Wanna grab a hold of that little song bird
Take her for a ride to the top of the world right now

•••••

leetle a/n: the song is "Top of the World" by the Dixie Chicks. and it wasn't meant to be a song fic, but i liked it that way.