Chapter 2: A Decision

Harry was going to be there any minutes. She hadn't seen him in three weeks since their 'talk' on the train. She didn't know if she should be feeling elated, upset, unsure, confused, or unconcerned. She felt a little of all five. She leaned her forehead against her bedroom window and stared into the garden below. Bill was standinga little ways behindRonwho was attempting to denomethe garden in an effort to clean up for thewedding. Bill was sipping lemonade, and clearly trying to engage Ron in conversation. At one point, however,she saw Ron turn to Bill with an angry expression contorting his face. Ron gestured to the garden around him. The anger vanished when an upset gnome bit his ankle before sprinting away. Bill threw his head back and laughed.

Ginny smiled. Getting up, she made her way downstairs to see her brothers. They were the only siblings that were currently at the burrow. Fred and George were working tirelessly at the joke shop; Charlie was on his way home from Romania for the Bill's wedding; Percy hadn't been heard from in over a year, and Fleur was with her mother and Gabrielle looking at flower displays.

"Hey Gin," Bill said grinning as she stepped into the garden. "Want to help Ron denome this rampant zoo? He's been asking me, but in my weakened condition…"

"You're weakened condition, Bill?" she said smiling.

He just shrugged and sipped his lemonade. "So…Gin, I heard some stuff…" Bill said glancing at Ron then back to Ginny grinning.

Ginny sighed heavily. "What did you hear?"

"You and Harry, huh?"

"Ron, honestly, do you need to share THAT with everyone?"

She stopped andaddressed Bill. "Yes, we date for about 3 months last year. We no longer are together." She avoided looking at Bill as she took off chasing after a particularly feisty gnome.

"You almost sound as if you're still sore about him dumping you? It's been almost 3 weeks," Ron said, flinging a gnome about 20ft.

Ginny stopped in her pursuit and turned to Ron. "You're an arse, do you know that?" She abandoned her chase, and walked inside. The last think she heard was Bill calling Ron a moron before she disappeared inside.

"Ginny?" said a voice from behind her as she began to ascend the stairs.

She stopped in her tracks; she knew that voice. Turning around, she plastered a large smile on her face. "Harry." He looked to have just arrived. White soot was sprinkled in his hair and on his black shirt. His kaki pants were wrinkled, looking as if they had trampled on by a hippogriff. "How are you?" he asked.

Ginny shrugged. "Pretty good, tired."

He smiled and dropped his trunk to the floor beside the fireplace. He advanced on her, pulling her close to him, and burying his nose in her hair. "I've missed you," he said, relaxing into the embrace.

"I've missed you too." She pulled back and smiled at him. "Ron and Bill are just outside. I'm sure they would love to see you. I have to…" she pointed upstairs. She just wanted to get away. Being around Harry was intoxicating; it did things to her brain.

Harry nodded, looking into her eyes. She knew he was trying to read her. If she didn't move fast enough, she was sure he'd read exactly what she was feeling. "Alright, will I see you at dinner?"

"Oh yea, wouldn't miss it." She smiled prettily. "When Hermione gets here, can you send her up please?"

Harry's suspicion turned instantly to concern. "Is something wrong?"

"No, why would you say that? Just because I want to see Hermione doesn't mean that something's wrong!" she snapped.

Nothing changed in Harry's eyes at her outburst. "I'll send her up when she arrives."

Ginny nodded and disappeared up the stairs and into her room.

About an hour later, there was a tentative knock on the door. "Come in." Hermione entered, dragging her trunk behind her. She examined her friend, before sitting down on her already made bed.

"What's up Gin? Harry made me come up here as soon as I came."

"Well, you could have greeted everyone, I didn't need you IMMEDIATELY."

Hermione smiled and got up to situate herself on Ginny's bed. "Now tell me, what's wrong?"

"Hermione, you know that Harry and I broke up, right?" she asked, picking at a piece of thread on her bedspread.

"I do," she said, giving her red headed friend a concerned look.

"Well, on the train ride home, we had a long talk about 'us,' about how we care about each other and why he broke it off in the first place."

"And?" Hermione asked eagerly.

"And…well, I've decided…" there was a long pause while Ginny weighed her words.

"You've decided what?" Hermione asked.

Ginny shrugged, "I can't sit back and let him go on this 'death mission' without me." Ginny said quietly. "I care for him so much! And…Hermione he's planning on leaving; leaving for some great stupidly noble reason. What if he doesn't come back? What if I have to live my life always asking myself 'what if?' what would have happened between us 'if'? I can't do that. I love him; however, I can't help but think to myself that he's being stupid by throwing the first thing that has been really good for both of us, out the window because he thinks it's the noble thing to do. He thinks that he's protecting me by not being with me. Doesn't it make more sense to spend as much time with the person that you love, to make the most of it? I want to shake him sometimes for giving it all up. He might never know; I might never know what we could have had, and that scares me." She sighed, and pulled her knees up to her chest. She started slowly again, "Hermione, what scares me the most, is the thought of him not coming home at all." Ginny looked up into Hermione's eyes. "Now, I know that I'm not 'you or Ron' but I still want the right to be able to be there with him while he's away and in danger. I want to fight Voldemort with him; even for him. I want to be able to protect and care for him. I want to be the one that he goes to for comfort. And it hurts me that he won't allow me to."

Hermione scooted closer to Ginny and wrapped her arm around the younger girl.

"Listen, Ginny, everyone knows that Harry is stubborn."

Ginny snorted, "That was the biggest understatement ever."

"In his mind, everyone that he has ever loved has ended up dead. And most of the time, it tends to be true. No wonder why he fears letting you get to close."

Ginny shook her head. "I can't let him just go off without me Hermione. I can't let him do that. I love him too much to stand on the sidelines and just watch him tease death. I can't stand by and do nothing!" She sat in silence for a few minutes, holding back emotion. "I need to talk to Neville."

Hermione pulled away quickly and stared at Ginny with wide eyes. "Ginny, now is NOT the time to play dirty. I'm pretty certain by the way Harry looks at you that he still loves you! And to try to rise a reaction out of him would be cruel."

Ginny's eyes widened. "Sweet Jesus, Hermione! I don't want to date Neville! I just need to talk to him."

Hermione gave the girl a withering look. "I really think you should rethink this."

Ginny glared at Hermione. "Are you trying to tell me that I can't be friends with whomever I want?"

"Of course not! I just don't know how Harry would react."

"He knows that I don't want to date Neville! This is ridiculous! I just want to talk with him!"

"Whatever you think best…" Hermione said uncertainly.

Ginny sat in her room later that night after dinner, writing in a notebook. There was a knock at the door, successfully throwing her from her train of thoughts.

"Can I come in?" a masculine voice asked through the door.

"Who is it?" Ginny asked, getting up from the midst of her unmade bed and making her way toward the door.

"It's Harry."

Ginny's sat on the other side of the door, weighing the benefits and consequences of answering the door. Her heart pounded so loud that she thought Harry might be able to hear it through the wood of her door. Slowly, she reached for thehandle and took a deep breath. Harry stood on the other side of her door, his hands jammed nervously into his trouser pockets. His hair was in disarray on top of his head, looking as if it had been earlier attacked by the now absent hands.

"What can I do for you?" Ginny asked, leaning against her door.

"Can I…?" Harry was looking past her into her room. It dawned on her that he had never had the pleasure of seeing her room before. Glancing behind her, she did a quick assessment of the state of cleanliness the room was in. Satisfied with the results she opened the door wider.

"Don't mind the bed. I didn't think I would be entertaining men in my room tonight."

Harry chuckled and entered her room. He stood in the middle of the room, revolving on the spot in order to examine her room from all angles.

"So what'd you need, Harry?" she asked after a minute. She had sat back down on her bed and was watching him.

"I wanted to talk about the wedding."

Ginny smiled warmly. The wedding wasn't for another two weeks. What could he possibly have to say about the wedding? "What about the wedding?" she asked.

Harry turned to her and came to sit on the end of her bed. "Ginny, I want to talk like we used to while we were dating."

Ginny stared at him in silence, urging him to continue.

"I really want us to stay friends."

"Harry; did we or did we not have a conversation about this on the train back home? I'll be right here for you, no matter what."

Harry nodded, looking down at her bedspread. He began to pick at a piece of loose string before looking up. Ginny could tell by the look in his eyes how hard this conversation was on him. "Look the thought of losing you scares me. And not just losing you physically, but losing you emotionally as well." He sighed heavily. "Before you, I'd never really experienced the feelings that I got whenever I was near you. It was the first time in my life when I was unconditionally happy. God I feel like a nutter," he muttered.

Ginny smiled. "You're not a nutter.

Harry gave a small smile before continuing. "Ginny, these past couple weeks without you have been…well...unpleasant." He chuckled at his word choice; he sobered quickly. "My mind is in this enormous battle and sometimes I think it would be better if Ron, Hermione, and I just leave quickly so I'd be put out of my out of my misery, at least for a while. However, I always realize that nothing can stop me from feeling the way I do about you. I thought that breaking it off with you would protect you with no cost to mine or your feeling. I figured we'd go our separate routes, and all would be well. I underestimated how much you truly meant to me, and I'm very sorry for that. I guess what I'm try to get at here is, please, I beg of you, don't ever forget me. That is probably the most selfish thing I've ever said, but…with you…the thought of you moving on with your life and me not being apart of it, not even a thought, well, itscares the hell out of me. If something does happen to me while I'm gone. Please don't forget me."

Ginny stared at him. She knew right then what she needed to do. Sure it was dangerous; sure she might lose her life, but it was a consequence she was willing to take to protect the boy sitting next to her. She had to talk to Neville.

She placed a hand on Harry's cheek and leaned forward to leave a chaste kiss on the corner of his mouth. "I could never forget the man that I love. And I won't ever have to, because you're going to come back to me, Mr. Potter." A tear ran down her cheek, and he reached up to wipe it away with his thumb. He pulled her in against his chest, burying his hand in her long curly auburn hair. She felt him shudder and felt the moisture of his tears on her cheek, or were they hers? She couldn't tell the difference. She sat there nestled in his arms, crying for them, crying for what they had, for what they will have, for their future; she cried for what she was sure now that she had to do. This was her only chance to let the fear over take her. This was her last chance to just break down and be held by him. After this, she must be strong. Her near future was already mapped out, and it was sure to be a rough ride. There would be no room for crying. There would only be room for strong thoughts, strong beliefs, and even stronger passions.

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