Finny: A special thanks to my new beta reader, slinkster sunshine! Be sure to read her fic, "The Sun In His Pocket"!

"Well," he began, in a contemplating and eerie tone, "the first thing I really need is a big bowl of ice cream."

"Ice cream?" I repeated, raising an eyebrow slightly.

"Yes," he confirmed. "Chocolate ice cream."

"How will that help with your leg?" I inquired, slightly annoyed. "I wasn't planning on becoming your personal slave."

I remembered a time when Finny had sprained his shoulder during a basketball game. I had to carry all of his books, and write out all his assignments, for three weeks straight. He tended to take advantage of this kind of situation, and I didn't want to go through it again. If it was possible for me to make a complete fool out of myself, and keep both of us satisfied, Finny knew exactly how to do it.

"Well then," he said softly. "I guess I don't really…..need it.." He coughed dramatically, and then, after making sure I was watching, he grasped his leg in agony. "OOOOHHHH the PAIN!"

So I did the only thing I could do in my situation: I went down to the cafeteria and got him chocolate ice cream with whipped cream, chocolate syrup, and almonds sprinkled on top. I paid for it, and then proceeded to carry it all the way back up to his room. When I returned, he was laughing at something on the TV.

"What's so funny?" I wondered, handing him the ice cream.

"I'm spying on the people in the lobby," he explained, wiping a tear from his cheek.

I watched as several people walked by on the screen, much to Phineas' glee. I shook my head at him. "You're a freak, Finny."

He spooned some of the ice cream into his mouth, then nodded at me.

I sank down beside him on the bed, rather roughly, as it was hard to get up on such a high bed. He uttered something incoherent. I ignored it. Finny was always making some kind of noise.

When he began to move around and rattle the bed, I turned to look at him. His face was bright red, cheeks full of ice cream, and he was frantically waving his arms at me.

"What ARE you doing?" I asked him, fearing for his sanity.

He suddenly swallowed everything that was in his mouth and began to shout.

"OW! OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW! My leg hurts! For REAL!"

It was then that I noticed that I was sitting on his broken leg. I jumped to my feet in alarm, knocking the ice cream into Finny's lap. He looked at me in horror.

"Oh Finny, I'm so sor - "

"It's cold!" He wailed.

"I'll get something!" I reassured him. I spotted a smoking coffeepot on the nearby counter. Without thinking, I grabbed it and poured the contents onto Finny's lap.

"NOOO, you fool!" he yelled. "OWWWW!"

I whacked myself in the head. "I'm so, so sorry! Want me to call the nurse?"

"As long as she's not YOU!"

I punched the little red button embedded in the wall above his head. Moments later, an attractive young nurse rushed into the room. "What's going on?" She demanded, glancing at Finny, who was busy fanning his crotch.

"Help me!" He exclaimed.

She stared at him, bewildered, and ran off to get help from another nurse.

I watched Finny as he stopped fanning himself, and turned to glare at me. "I hate you," he said, with an indignation that told me everything he had just said was false.