Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be.

A/N: This takes place the summer after 5th book. I made up the bit about Remus calling James and Cerius his family, I needed it for the story and I don't think it's much of a stretch.

I've been working on this for longer than I care to admit, and I'm still not totally satisfied with the ending. Constructive crit would be greatly appreciated, so would praise, and I'll except flames, too. Just review, please!

Excepting Love

Harry sat on the edge of his bed on Privet Drive holding a very warn-looking scrap of parchment. His heart felt as though it was being squeezed in some type of muggle vice, his brain felt as though he had been stunned. This was not a new feeling for Harry, especially that summer, but it was certainly a new cause. Usually this feeling came over him when he thought about Serious or read an old letter from his dead godfather. But he was not holding a letter from Serious now, he was holding a letter from Remus Lupin.

For what seemed like the hundredth time since Hedwig had brought the note, for the three lines on a parchment could hardly be called a letter, Harry let his eyes travel down the parchment.

Harry,

I would appreciate it if you didn't try to contact me any more. It is for your own good.

Remus Lupin

As had happened every time Harry read the letter he felt himself growing simotaniously angry and sad. How dare Remus try to do the very thing Harry was constantly being warned against. How dare Remus try to push Harry, one of the unfortunately few people who truly cared about him, away. "For my own good, meaning that it's too hard," harry muttered bitterly. "Don't I know that loving is hard? But I'm not allowed to push my friends away."

Presently the sadness took the forefront in Harry's emotions. Remus had to be feeling as alone as Harry was, probably more. While Harry often felt that Serious was the first person to really know him and love him it wasn't completely true. The Weaslies, his teachers at Hogwarts, even Remus himself cared about Harry. The whole world cared about Harry Potter because they thought he had saved them from the clutches of evil. On the other hand, Remus was seen as evil by most wizards. He had lived in exile for most of his life, and now the three people who had ever truly excepted him were dead. 'Well,' Harry thought, 'Peter may as well be dead.'

Harry rose from his bed suddenly decisive. He pocketed the note from Remus along with his wand and brushed open his bedroom door. He hurried down the stairs before he could lose his nerve, pushed open the front door, and called over his shoulder, "I'm going out!" Not surprisingly there was no answer from his relatives.

Once outside Harry strode down the drive of Number Four, then stopped. He had not gotten very far and already his plan was showing holes. How exactly was he supposed to get wherever he was going without his guard from the Order thinking he had disappeared? For that matter, where was he going? He had assumed that Remus would be at Grimed Place, but now that Serious was gone he did not even know if people could get into the headquarters. He sighed and sank down into the perfectly manicured grass, privately enjoying the thought of Aunt Petunia's outrage if she knew he could be causing her lawn permanent damage, then bolted upright again. He thought he had heard a noise from behind the bushes. His wand in his hand Harry began to turn in a slow circle. "Who's there?"

"Relax Harry, it's just me." Nimfadora Tonks emerged from behind Harry's aunt's shrubbery pulling off a silvery cloak. Harry blanched when he saw her. Her hair, usually some shade of bright pink or purple, was a dull brown. Her clothes were also less than her usual exuberant taste. She was wearing jean shorts and a white T-shirt.

"Oh, hi Tonks," Harry said as he slumped back onto the grass.

"Who were you expecting, deatheaters?"

"No, I…" Harry let his answer fade into nothing. "Ur Tonks, not to be rude, but are you okay?" He had asked partly out of concern and partly to change the subject.

"Course Harry, why do you ask?"

"You just seem, I don't know, down or something."

"I'm fine," Tonks said, though she didn't sound particularly convincing. "Now, why are you out here?"

"Oh," Harry started. He had nearly forgotten his original purpose for leaving the relative safety of his bedroom. "I got a note from Remus and I think I need to go see him. Do you know where he's staying and how I can get there?" At the mention of Remus's name a shadow passed over Tonks' face.

"I know where he's staying, and I could probably get you there, but I don't think he'll let you in."

"How about you help me with the first two? I'll handle him not wanting to talk to anyone." Tonks hesitated then nodded.

"All right." She held out her left arm. "Hold on tight." A very uncomfortable moment later Harry found himself standing in the middle of Hogsmeed.

"Tonks, if Remus is so set on being alone why is he living in the only completely wizarding village in Britain?"

"He's not living in Hogsmeed proper, he's living in the Shrieking Shack." Harry felt his mouth drop in surprise.

"The Shrieking Shack? Why, why that house of all places to live?"

"Maybe because it's the only place that's truly his alone. Maybe because it is haunted. He doesn't look much better than a ghost these days. I don't know Harry, I can't explain why he does the things he does! Someone's coming." And without another word Tonks slipped beneath the invisibility cloak leaving Harry at a loss as to what he had said or done to upset her. He began to walk, figuring that a boy standing still in the middle of the street would draw more attention than a boy moving down the same street.

The walk was a silent one. Harry had learned from experience that people tended to get suspicious if you appeared to be talking to thin air, and he was doing his best to draw as little attention as possible. He knew that Dumbledore would not be happy that he had left his aunt and uncle's house for what would be seen as a frivolous reason, and as much as he hated to admit it they were right to be worried about his safety. Despite his recent actions Harry Potter was not a complete idiot.

At length they reached the fence surrounding the infamous Shrieking Shack and Tonks lifted the invisibility cloak enough so that her head was visible. "Here's where I leave you Harry, I've had enough of Remus's temper recently. I'll stay here and keep watch." Harry nodded briefly before climbing the fence, rather easily, and slipping almost silently through the tiny yard and up to the boarded up front door. He supposed that there must be some sort of charm in the door, Remus had to have some way of getting in and out even if it was just to get food.

Harry stood in front of the door for several minutes trying to figure out exactly what he was doing here. He was here to convince Remus not to push everyone away, but exactly what arguments did he have for his points. "Well, I'm here now, may as well give this a try," he muttered to himself. He raised his fist and knocked three times upon the wood. There was no answer so Harry repeated his actions. After another few moments of silence he called out, "Remus, I know you're in there! Open up!" Again he waited listening for any sound of life inside the house. He thought he heard someone moving around for a moment, then things went back to their previous state of silence. "Remus, I'm not leaving, open up!" Another few minutes of silence passed and Harry groaned. Remus was proving much harder to persuade than he had originally hoped, though it was not completely unexpected. "Remus Lupin, open this door or I'll blast it open. That would result in my expulsion from Hogwarts. I'm sure we don't want that, I don't in any case, but I'll do it. Come to think of it it might be fun to see how far I can push the new minister. Seems that being "The Chosen One" must have some perks. Shall we see?" After a moment there was a rattling of locks on the inner side of the door and it swung open.

"Please Harry, say what you've come to say and leave." Harry was startled by his former professor's physical state. The man's robes, usually shabby and patched, had passed beyond any hope of repair. There were several fresh scars on his prematurely lined face, and though the full moon was weeks away Remus looked exhausted.

"Remus, I…" Harry suddenly wished he had prepared a speech, or at the very least a list of important points. His head was suddenly empty, and it would have been very nice to have one of Hermione's perfectly organized lists to refresh his memory. He did not, however, have this luxury, and he didn't dare return home to make one up and come back another time. For one thing Moody was likely to be on guard next time he attempted to come. For another Remus was highly unlikely to open the door for him a second time. So Harry simply opened his mouth and said the first thing that came into his head. "I won't stop writing letters to you."

The look that passed over Remus's face was a mixture of surprise, pain, and something almost like pride. "I guess you had better come in, Harry. I don't suppose you're going to leave until I've heard you out, and at least it's slightly safer inside." He stepped back so that Harry could enter the house.

Harry's first look at the inside of Remus's living quarters made a stab of pain go through his heart; his second look almost made him cry. He had thought that, if Remus truly insisted on living here, someone would have made him clean things up a bit. He had been wrong. The chairs were still broken, the curtains were still torn, there were still smudges of old dried blood on the floor. He hadn't thought it possible for his faith in The Order to get any lower, but at that moment he wondered if any of them really cared about anyone but themselves. As if reading his thoughts Remus said gently, "Don't blame them, Harry. The whole wizzarding world knows what I am, it isn't safe for any of them to be seen helping me."

With that sentence something clicked in Harry's brain. "Says who?"

"Excuse me, I don't think I understand your question." Remus's voice was measured curiosity.

"Did they stay away on their own or did they offer to help you and you pushed them away?"

"I don't see how that has any bearing on anything current, Harry. My current concern is how to get you back home as safely as possible."

"And what about my current concern, Professor Lupin?"

"And what would that be, Harry?" Harry felt his temper rise. Remus was treating him as though he was a hysterical child!

"Bloody hell Remus, what do you think?" Harry felt heat in his palms and realized the very walls of the house were shaking. This probably wasn't any great feat, the walls probably shook when wind blew through the trees, but Harry realized it was his loss of control that was causing a mini earthquake in the shack. With a conscious effort he took a deep breath and looked at his former professor. He was surprised to see Remus looking placidly back at him.

"I honestly don't know, Harry, tell me." All traces of condescension were gone from Remus's voice. He was talking to Harry, adult to adult. Harry answered in an equally calm voice, determined to earn Remus's respect.

"My current concern is you, Professor."

"And you came here, defied Dumbledore's orders, because of this concern?" Remus sounded slightly disbelieving.

"Dumbledore never actually said…" Remus cut Harry off with a wave of his hand.

"Maybe not, but I know his wishes were clear to you. And, however angry you may be at him at the moment, I know you would not disobey Professor Dumbledore for something as trivial as my well being." At that a look of indescribable pain crossed the boy's face.

"Do you truly see it that way, Professor?"

"See what how, Harry?"

"Do you truly think we see your happiness, your well being, as a triviality?"

"I believe," Remus's words were slow and measured. "I believe that there are many more important things in this war than my state of being. I have nothing particularly special to offer anyone, no particular skills that can be used in the fight against Voldamort. I am glad to do what I can to help, but I do not believe that others should waste time, time that could be spent tracking down death eaters or gathering information, worrying about me."

"And when this is all over, when Voldamort and his followers have been defeated, then what? If we spend all of our time working toward the end what will be left when it finally comes?" Remus was silent so Harry continued. "If we start putting all our efforts into winning the war and considering the lives lost trivialities, won't we become as bad as Voldamort?"

"I never said the lives lost in this war, on either side, should be considered trivialities, Harry. Human life is not to be taken lightly." A light seemed to have come on in Harry's head, and his features fell just a little more.

"And you don't see yourself as human." It really wasn't a question, it needed no answer. Still, Remus could not help justifying himself to the boy who sat in front of him.

"Harry, even if you don't believe me I am not entirely human, and I am certainly not the personification of humanity. I have done terrible things, put more people in danger, than you can possibly imagine."

"So we're just supposed to see the bad things people have done?" Harry tried to make his voice sound innocent and calm. "In a sense I killed my parents, I let Peter escape, I let Cedric and Serious die right in front of me."

"You couldn't help any of that happening, Harry, it isn't fair to blame yourself." Remus had slipped back into teacher mode without realizing the opening he was giving Harry. "You can't help who you are, or who others made you to be."

"And you can't help the fact that, when you were 3-years-old you got bit by a werewolf. Unless," Harry said this with a small smile, "you went up to him and asked him to bite you. Seeing as I'm sure that's not how it happened you can't take the blame, it's not fair."

"You are correct, I can not take the blame for the original werewolf bite. But my decisions since have not always been in the best interests of the general public. I put my friends in danger by allowing them to become anamagi for me, I put my students in danger by teaching at Hogwarts, I put the entire Order in danger by giving the ministry more reason to look into their personal lives."

"Maybe all that's true," Harry admitted, "But you also taught your friends that they could love someone so much that they were worth a little risk. Well most of them anyway," he added thinking of Wormtale. "You were the best DADA teacher we've ever had, and if you weren't in the Order, if you hadn't come to the Ministry that night, I probably wouldn't b here. If you remember, you were the one who prevented me from running into that arch after Serious." Harry waited for an answer, and when it was clear Remus wasn't going to say anything he said softly, "I'm the only other one left."

"The only what, Harry?" Remus looked at the young man with concern.

"Once last summer you described my dad and Cerius as your brothers. Now I'm the only member of that family left. I don't think they would have let you pull away from everyone like you have, so I won't either." The end of Harry's statement reminded Remus of James' reaction to the news that one of his best friends was a werewolf. Remus vividly remembered James slapping him across the face and shouting, "So what?"

"Harry, how can I make you understand the dangers of associating with one of my kind?" Remus asked with no small amount of exasperation.

"You can't," Harry said defiantly. "Or at least you can't convince me that Voldamort is going to become more determined to kill me because I am friends with a werewolf."

At Harry's last statement something in Remus melted. He could not remember the last time someone had called him a friend, and he suddenly found himself unable to speak. Harry smiled gently, rose, and walked toward the older man. In one movement, before Remus had a chance to realize what was happening, Harry slipped his arms around him and hugged him tightly.

"You are worth caring about, professor," Harry said gently. "And I'm not the only one who thinks so."

"You are correct, Harry, you are not the only one who sees value in Remus." Both men jumped and turned in the direction of the new voice. Albus Dumbledore stood in the doorway smiling benignly.

"Professor I…" Harry fumbled for words that would explain his actions. "A note from Remus and…"

"I am not about to reprimand you my boy," Dumbledore said calmly. "Quite the opposite in fact. I would like to offer you my congratulations."

"Ur, for what sir?" the boy asked perplexed.

"For finally getting Remus Lupin to listen to reason," Dumbledore explained laughing. "We have all been trying to do that very thing for more years than you can imagine." Remus and Harry both smiled slightly. "

"However," Dumbledore continued more seriously, "I do believe it is time for you to return to your relatives' home." Harry tried to hide his disappointment as he nodded to his headmaster. The boy turned to his former teacher and said firmly, "I'll be hearing from you then."

"Yes Harry, I do suppose you will," Remus said sounding resigned but happy. The werewolf opened the door and ushered his uninvited guests out into the summer afternoon. When the two men had almost reached the fence Remus whispered, "Thank you, Harry."

The boy turned, a knowing smile playing on his lips, and called, "You're welcome."

A/N2: Love it, hate it, let me know!