A/N: Based on the 2nd Season episode, 'Over the Edge'. Dialogue lifted directly from the show.
It was easier than I thought it would be.
It was stupid to put myself in that position, I know that now. Especially with everything that had happened, with Chris's attempted suicide, and Bobby . . . There was no good reason for my actions. But it happened, regardless; and probably would have happened anyway, really. I was lucky.
I was finishing up my report for the Captain when it happened.
"Hey, Joellen." I knew the voice, but when I looked up and saw Bobby, I froze. My heart was pounding wildly, and I just wanted to get away. I kept my eyes down on my paper. "Where is everybody?"
"They're around somewhere." I tried to keep it casual, but his question scared me.He called my bluff. "That's funny, 'cause I only saw your car out there in the parking lot." I knew the tone of voice, the smug, satisfied, predatory look that would be on his face.
"Yeah." I'd come to work early, to try to get this report finished. I hadn't thought he'd be here, that he'd corner me so easily. "Please, Bobby. I have work to do." I hadn't tried pleading before, hadn't been this scared. I was alone. Why wouldn't he just stop it?
"The captain assign that to you?" He leant in over me, his body too close to mine and blocking my way to the door. Making me aware of how much bigger he was than me, how much stronger.
I tried to hide my fear, even though it was strangling my voice in my throat. "Yes. And he wants it done before he comes in." Too much to hope that I'd put him off with the threat.
"Oh. I guess that means when I make captain, you'll do exactly what I say, huh?" He lifted a finger then, reaching to trace the outline of my ear.
I shot out of my chair and away, unable to take it anymore. "Don't!"
He slammed the chair violently out of his way, stalking towards me. I jumped as the metal hit the wall, clutching my arms around myself. Fear, bright and hot, washed over me. I tensed, ready to run – but I couldn't get around him. I couldn't move. Oh, God, it was really happening.
"I don't like games," he snarled, low and ugly. One hand came up, slashing the air between us.
"You'll never guess what I just found," a cool voice interrupted him, and Bobby turned. I saw the anger slip away, saw the smile slide into its place. Quick, easy, and he was the Bobby Cain everyone else saw. That scared me almost as much as everything else.
"Hey, Jarod. I didn't, uh, I didn't see your car outside." The last of the nervousness slipped away, as Bobby looked at Jarod's face and decided he hadn't seen anything.
"I took the bus." Jarod's voice was colder than I had ever heard it. No doubt, the new guy was a little strange, but not in a bad way.
"Oh."
"A seedless watermelon." Jarod held up the fruit. The silence was rabidly uncomfortable, but I didn't care. All I could feel was relief. "Now I wonder how they get them out."
"Yeah. Listen, uh, I got some work I gotta do. I'll, uh, talk to you later." Bobby picked up the papers he had left on the desk, giving me a last look that made me shiver.
He headed for the door, and I grabbed my chair, falling into it in front of the desk. I stared at my report, picked up my pen.
In the corner of my eye, Jarod gently set the watermelon down, sitting himself. "If I'm tired, you must be exhausted."
"Why?" I was giddy with relief.
"Well, not only do you have to work and train all day like the rest of us, but you have to put up with him."
"What do you mean?" I had to look at him, but didn't want to face the understanding and the kindness from this guy who was still almost a complete stranger. Besides, what could he really –
"Him looking over your shoulder," Jarod's dark eyes were soft, kind. "Constantly wondering when he'll show up. What he'll want. The rage. The powerlessness." His voice turned rough, then, eyes deep with memory. "I know it would eat at me until I wanted to scream."
It hit something in me, smacking hard against the wall I'd built to keep Bobby – and everyone else – out.
Outside, passing the rescue trucks and headed toward the street, I found myself confessing everything. "At first it seemed like harmless flirting. I thought I could handle it. Handle Bobby, but . . . he's so aggressive! It scares me!"
We crossed the street, and Jarod looked both ways. "Being the only woman. You must have felt trapped."
"Well I know that if I complained to McMann, I would get nothing but flak. Bobby would only deny it, and I'd become the black sheep of the squad, if I wasn't fired. Believe me, it's hard enough being 'one of the boys' around here. So I just kept my mouth shut."
"And then Chris found out?" All the empathy in the world in his voice. How could he understand?
I put a hand to my hair, shoving the tears back. Crying never did anyone any good. "One night, Bobby . . . touched me. I was upset." I'd been sobbing, in the back of the rescue truck. "Chris comforted me. He's such a great guy, y'know? As if dealing with his own problems wasn't enough, he wanted to take care of me, too." I took a breath. "He was really angry with Bobby. He even wrote up a report, but . . . I couldn't sign it." I knew what would happen even if I did. Nothing.
"Well, you should have." The certainty in Jarod's voice had me swinging around to face him, confused. "You're not the first woman to feel this way."
He reached into his pocket, and I blinked, trying to figure out what he was saying. He pulled out an envelope, and a piece of paper, handing it to me. "Bobby's done this before." Disgust, resolution. "In Portland. He almost lost his job. His wife nearly left him. But he intimidated the victim until she dropped the charges."
But that still didn't mean anything. "I don't know." Despair filled me. "He's connected, Jarod. Bobby's about to become captain. Even if I take him on . . . " I shook my head. "He'll win."
"Don't be so sure." He smiled, a tight little smile.
To this day, I don't know why I reached for the help Jarod was offering. He wasn't the first. Chris had been. But Chris . . . Chris had come out of the coma, but he had a long way to go before he'd be out of the Spokane Free Clinic. So I did what I do best – my job. And I did my best to ignore Bobby, and his insinuations. It was hard, and then it was too much. Jarod knew.
So, for the first time since Chris had tried to kill himself, I reached out.
It was easier than I thought it would be.
But it gave me my freedom back.
Trust.