A/N: I do not own Teen Titans. (Though I wish I owned Raven.)
Chapter III.
Starfire floated into the observation room. She had been watching the "lessons" this new teacher of Raven's had been administering. A lot of it Raven looked bored with, having been things she'd already discovered about her powers, however today's lesson promised to be something different. Today Raven was supposed to loose control of her power. The idea frightened Starfire, but she wanted to be close by in case her friend needed help. Robin was supposed to be helping them for the first time today and Starfire was curious to see how her Robin was supposed to help Raven in her training.
Starfire settled to the ground and crept slowly to the single window that over looked the chamber that the Titans had built for Raven during the incident with her father. After Merlin had managed to stop laughing hysterically at it he had agreed it would be an ideal place to train Raven, once he had totally rewritten the symbols around the room into something a little more usable.
"Today Raven I want you to sit. No levitation, you're going to need every ounce of your power." Merlin was saying as he seated her with her back to the control room and the door leading into the room. "I want you to focus on this."
Starfire watched as Merlin placed a black rock on the floor in front of Raven. There was no sign of Robin anywhere.
"How is a piece of coal going to help in my training?" Raven was saying with an obvious strain in her voice. Merlin had forbidden her to meditate for days and the tedious nature of his lectures was starting to show.
"Focus your power on it. Direct your telekinesis inward. You need to exert pressure from all points surrounding the rock." Merlin was saying.
"I know how to exert inward pressure, I just don't see what kind of use it's going to be. It's not like I can turn it into a diamond." Raven was saying testily.
"I guess we shall see about that. As I said earlier, today is the day that you are going to loose control of your power." Merlin said patiently.
The rock turned even darker than usual as Raven's power surrounded it and lifted it into the air. "Nobody has that kind of strength, if they did there would be a lot more diamonds to be had in the world." Raven pointed out concentrating. "Besides, I'm not accustomed to just loosing control on command."
"I know, that's why I've kept you from meditating for a few days. I am going to push you over the edge. The point of this exercise is not going to be controlling your power, but instead channeling your power towards a goal and letting it work on its own." Merlin coached.
Raven continued to concentrate and Starfire was unsure, but the rock seemed slightly smaller. "This is all I have." Raven said between gritted teeth.
"Then it simply isn't good enough." Merlin said as he stepped into view. Starfire gasped as he transformed into a perfect likeness of Beast boy.
"Perhaps you need to be annoyed. Perhaps by someone that annoys you frequently. You realize it's the only way that I can express myself to you, so that you'll notice me." Merlin said in a perfect rendition of Beast boy's voice. Starfire couldn't have told the difference. Raven however had a sneer on her face.
"I already know how Beast boy feels Merlin. He may be annoying, but he's also my friend." Raven said defiantly.
"Then how about someone who's a bit closer." Cyborg said as Merlin changed into his shape stepping in front of her. "Someone who's like a brother you never had."
Starfire noticed that Raven's sneer had started to slip as the darkness deepened around the rock. Starfire was no expert, but Raven looked like she was worried. "This game is getting old Merlin."
"A game! May I play friend Raven!" Merlin said as he took Starfire's own form floating in front of Raven and then floating around behind her. "My own sister does not like me, and we never got to play such games on Tamaran, please friend Raven accept me as your friend and we can play games together!"
Starfire was not amused. She refused to believe that she sounded, well, that needy. Sure she felt alone sometimes, but it wasn't like she begged for Raven's attention.
Starfire watched as another figure stepped into the room below as Merlin regained his true form. Robin was there below, but hadn't seen her. She watched as he stepped close to Merlin.
Raven gulped. She was loosing control. It was all she could do to keep her power from ripping her to shreds. Merlin had gone through every Titan but one. Please, not him.
"You are most stubborn Raven." Merlin said with his own voice behind her. "Perhaps something more is needed to make you loose control."
"Maybe someone that you're in love with." Robin's voice came from behind her.
Raven closed her eyes and prayed to whatever god, dimensional entity, or universal power might save her. What little control she had over her powers was quickly slipping. All she could do was point it in the direction of the coal and hope she didn't blow up half of the city. It wasn't until she felt Robin's arms around her, pulling her backward into his lap that she lost all that remained of her control. Power ripped through her like a hot burning knife as uncontrollable sobs began to escape from her. Robin's arms encircled her as she cried and pulled her close to his chest.
"Please Raven, I want to hear you say it. Please tell me how you feel." Merlin said from Robin's body.
"You're not playing fair Merlin!" Raven nearly screamed between the sobs. It sounded stupid even to her ears, but she wasn't exactly in control of anything right now, least of all her emotions. She just hoped that there weren't too many fatalities. "Why are you doing this to me? Dangling what can never be mine in front of me, and for what, some stupid training?"
"I'm doing it because I need to know how you feel." Robin replied softly.
Raven finally gave up and leaned into Merlin's arms, reaching down and grasping desperately at his arms and his gloved hands that looked just like Robin's hands. She laid her head against his neck and wept bitterly. Even if it wasn't Robin at least she could pretend for a while.
"Yes Merlin, I love him. I love him more dearly than my own life. He is everything to me, and I would gladly sacrifice myself to save him. Are you happy now?" Raven sobbed curling up into Merlin's arms like a baby. "I can never have him though. He loves my best friend. They deserve to be together. He deserves to be happy with her. What can I offer him, except a woman who can never fully express how she feels, a woman he can never be with because my emotions would destroy us both."
The explosion that rocked the room would have easily destroyed her if it hadn't been for Merlin's shield. Her power finally snapped. She looked to where the coal had previously been and there wasn't anything there. The walls had remained intact, and a nimbus of power surrounded her. For the first time in her life she felt, emptied. She felt as if one of the heaviest burdens had been lifted from her chest. She couldn't have lifted a matchstick with her power right now even with her emotions in such turmoil.
"I guess we'll have to use a smaller piece of coal next time." Merlin said conversationally. The only problem was that he was using his own voice and it wasn't coming from anywhere near the body that was currently holding her protectively.
Horrified, Raven turned around to look in the direction of the voice. She had been knocked flat, despite the shield and was currently lying on top of Robin. Then she saw Merlin, the real Merlin, standing a few feet away.
Raven looked down into Robin's eyes as she lay on top of him. It would have been a dream come true if it hadn't been for what had just transpired. Raven leaped to her feet as the rage gripped her. "Robin, how could you!" She shouted as the tears came unbidden to her eyes. Fortunately, with her powers burned out there wasn't any backlash to deal with so she could let her emotions take full reign. Raven ran for the door as Robin shouted for her. All she knew was that she needed to get as far away from him as possible.
Robin got to his feet slowly. "Well, that could have gone better." He said as he looked at the carnage. The training room was going to need definite repairs.
"Are you kidding? I couldn't have asked for anything better. Raven's powers are temporarily burned out. You need to find her and get this relationship between you Starfire and Raven resolved while you have the opportunity." Merlin said looking at the door that Raven had disappeared out of.
Robin looked around the room one last time before looking up at the control room to see if the explosion had destroyed the observation window. There he saw Starfire. She was standing there with debris stuck at odd angles in her hair. It would have looked quite comical if it hadn't been for the implication that she had been there the entire time and had overheard everything.
Robin struggled to speak, to find something to say to explain what was going on. Starfire just stared at him with pain in her eyes before turning and walking away. "I guess you had better go talk to both of them." Merlin said as he followed Robin's gaze.