Chapter Eight: Repercussions and Breakdowns
Scully stood at her back door and watched Mulder walk home. Before he turned the corner down his street, Mulder turned and waved to her one last time. She returned the gesture and entered her house.
She stood in the kitchen and thanked God that everyone was in the family room watching television. She could easily sneak up the back stairwell and down the hall to her bedroom. The last thing she wanted to do was to spend time with people.
She crept down the hall into the bathroom adjoining her room to Melissa's room. She closed both doors to the bathroom and turned the shower on as hot as it would go. Slowly, she peeled off her clothes, one by one, in a strange 'calm-before-the-storm' manner. As she stepped under the pounding water, the heavens opened and her tears began to flower. Harder and harder until she could not control them anymore. She leaned against the wall of the shower, sinking to the floor of the bathtub.
There she sat, letting the shower drain out the sound of her sobs and wash away her tears. Twenty minutes she sat like that until she could no longer cry. The muscles in her stomach were sore, her fingertips wrinkly from the water. Slowly, she turned the water off and stepped out of the shower. Scully wrapped her periwinkle terrycloth robe around her, clutching it tight, before opening the door of the bathroom leading to her bedroom.
She sat down on her bed and finally laid her head down on the pillow; she pulled the quilt up to her neck. Her mind numbly raced because she knew that this problem was larger than she had ever bargained for. She had no experience in this situation, and she felt that… To be honest, she did not know what she felt.
Slowly, she drifted off into a fitful sleep, haunted by the crashing and yelling of her afternoon.
The next morning went by in a blur. Scully wandered through the halls of Fairfield High. When she ended up in her next period class, she was kind of shocked to find herself there because she did not remember entering the room. She did not hear one word any of her teachers spoke. In Pre-Calculus, as the teacher placed a test on her desk, Scully looked up quickly. Then, as if slapped across the face, she realized where she was.
She focused on her test as best as she could. She wanted to do her best because she suspected that Mulder would feel guilty if she did poorly. As if he could have prevented yesterday from happening. Methodically, step-by-step. Multiply. Add. Divide. Although she was the last one to finish her test, Scully was proud of herself. She probably did not earn an A, but it was definitely a high B.
Only two more classes until lunch. Until Mulder. In French, Scully fell asleep, only to be awoken by snickers and the loud crash of the ruler against her desk. She woke up with a loud "No!" much to the amusement of the class. Mme. DuPree, startled by Scully's outburst, looked at the girl strangely.
"Are..are you all right?" the teacher asked. Scully nodded. "Dana, would you like to go to the bathroom?" Scully nodded.
She squeezed out of her seat and walked to the bathroom, once again in a daze, though she could feel the adrenaline coursing through her body. The crash of the ruler on her desk translated to the crash of Mulder hitting the floor in her dreams. "God, help me," she whispered as she applied a cold, wet paper towel to her face. She stood in front of the mirror for a full five minutes before trudging back to class. Mme. DuPree did not disturb her the rest of class. As the bell rang and Scully filed out of class, just like everyone else, she was stopped with a hand on her shoulder. She turned around to see Mme. DuPree studying Scully's face.
"Dana, are sure you're okay?" Mme. DuPree asked.
Scully studied the teacher's face before speaking, "Yeah, I just had…" Dana made up some story about how her father almost fell off one of the Navy ships and how she has recurring nightmares about it. "It always scares me when he's at sea," she finished, hoping her story was at least minutely plausible.
The old lady smiled at her, "I understand. My mother was a flight attendant, and it always scared me when she flew, especially long flights. If you ever need to talk about it, I'm here."
Dana smiled and thanked the woman. She liked Mme. DuPree, and she kind of felt bad for making up that story.
Scully slept through the entire Public Speaking class. No one was paying attention because everyone was giving his or her persuasive speeches, and she had already done hers last week.
Finally, lunch came. Mulder met Scully by her locker, which was unusual because they usually met each other at the lunch table. Mulder was anxious; he gave her a nervous smile, testing out the waters. Scully feebly returned the smile, her focus on his face. She could not find any evidence of last nights events on his face. Mulder shifted under her gaze. "I'm okay," he whispered.
Scully frowned.
"I..uh made you lunch," he offered, presented two brown bags.
"Thanks, you didn't have to do that," she spoke for the first time.
"I'm the one that should be saying that to you. Let's go to lunch," Mulder coaxed, taking her hand in his.
Scully nodded and let him lead her to the cafeteria. They sat at their usual table with the guys from the "Monty Python" movie night, who all hollered their hellos. Mulder smiled and returned their greetings, but Scully stayed silent. The three boys shot quizzical glances towards Mulder, but Mulder just shook his head. The boys let the couple be.
Following Mulder's lead, Scully opened her paper bag, taking out a bottle of Coke, a sandwich, a bag of potato chips and an apple. Mulder sat across from her, watching the pained expression on her face. She just stared at the food, not having the will to eat. "Scully, com'on and eat. Just a little bit. Scully nodded and took a small bite out of her turkey and cheese sandwich. Mulder opened his soda bottle before doing the same to hers. Silently, Scully ate half of her lunch. Mulder shifted nervously. The three guys next to them exchanged glances.
Scully finished her Coke and dropped the bottle in the bag, but upon doing so, she noticed a folded piece of paper, now resting underneath the glass bottle. She looked up at Mulder, but he was concentrated on peeling the sticker off his apple. Then she glanced around the table before reaching into the bag and grabbing the note.
Scully opened it in her lap, underneath the table. It simply read, "I'm sorry." Scully coughed, trying to hide the tears that were ominously welling up in her eyes. Mulder, who'd glanced up as soon as she coughed, dumped the rest of his lunch in the bag and gathered his things and hers before standing up. He leaned down and whispered "Let's go somewhere else," before taking her hand in his. Instead of leading her, like he did into the cafeteria, he walked by her side, his arm around her waist.
Scully, unable to keep the tears at bay, began crying. "Shh, it's okay. Just wait a second," he soothed as he tried to find the right key to open up the old hallway. Finally, he pushed the old wooden door opened and ushered her inside. He turned around, trying to adjust his eyes to the darkness. Before he even realized that she was standing right in front of him, Scully enveloped him in a hug, burying her face in his chest. Mulder wrapped his arms around her waist.
"I should have told you before. I..just..didn't exactly know how to broach the subject. I know this is a lot to deal with. And if you don't want to deal with this, that's okay. I would completely understand if you- "
Scully interrupted him, "If I what? If I broke up with you because your father is…is…" She couldn't bring herself to say it. She waved her hand to illustrate her point. "I'd never break up with you for something that was totally out of your hands. I just don't like the fact that- " she broke into tears "- he's so horrible to you."
"No, no," Mulder soothed, rocking her from side to side, "I'm okay."
Scully pulled out of his embrace, never letting go of his hands, she pulled him further down the hallway, where light poured from the windows above the doors leading to the various classrooms. There, she dropped his hands and, with an unsteady hand, shifted his shaggy hair away from his forehead. Mulder backed away from her touch.
"Please, Mulder, I just want to see it," Scully pleaded.
"No, it's- " Mulder protested.
Scully shook her head, cutting him off. She was not going to listen to his protests. She reached for his hair again, this time with a steady hand. Scully could not help but gasp as she saw the gash across the left half of his forehead. Gently, she pulled his hair back further to see how far deep into the hairline it went back. The gash, now on top of a swollen black-and-blue goose egg on his forehead, was bloody and fiercely red around the edges.
"You need stitches."
"It looks worse than it feels," Mulder offered.
"Oh, Mulder."
Scully collapsed against the wall, sinking to the floor. She wrapped her arms around her knees, pulling them to her chest. Mulder, unsure of what to do, squatted before her, watching her face. She rested her head against her arms, on top of her bent knees. Mulder ran his fingers through her straight, auburn hair as it fanned out over both sides of her.
After a few moments, She lifted her head and wiped away her tears. "I'm sorry," she said, clearing her throat. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "You shouldn't be consoling me. I should be the one comforting you."
"Oh, Scully," he laughed as he sat next to her against the wall. "You've had to deal with all of this in a matter of minutes. I should've warned you. I've grown accustomed to this."
Scully sniffled and rested her head on Mulder's shoulder.
Mulder wrapped his arm around her, pulling her close. "And anyway," he continued, "I'm happy. It's easier to deal with my dad when I can come to you. I hope you understand how important you are to me. And how grateful I am for you." He kissed her hair.
"You're welcome, Mulder."
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Okay, guys, Mulder's last little paragraph was as close to an 'I love you' as I could put into this chapter. I wanted SO BAD for them to say that, but it would've been silly. After all, they're in high school and have been dating for, what, two weeks! But you know…
Please review, it makes me happy.
Theresa