Disclaimer: I am not making any money of this fic, nor do I own Star Trek: Voyager, Deep Space Nine, The Next Generation or the original series, or anything else I make references to. If you saw the character on any show, then it is not mine. The same goes for ships, planets, cultures, et cetera. This story will depict a loving relationship between two women and there are no apologies to be made over this. Chapter 10 title is from "Dawn" by Stabbing Westward.

Genre: Action-Adventure, Drama
Codes: K/7, T/7
Feedback: Please, reviews are the food of the muse… but flames are for candles!

Home, Chapter 10
My angel, my reluctant whore...

Past, 2373...

Captain Janeway wandered the halls of the ship, looking for Jessica. She had a few requests to make and knew that if anyone could fulfill those requests, it was the Queen. She shook her head, still surprised that that little girl was ruler of— Kathryn stopped. 'Ruler of what?' She realized that she had no idea how expansive Jessica's territory was. Was she queen of a planet, a series of planets, an entire sector? Answers having been promised, Kathryn once again stopped and asked the Dracco where Jessica was, as she found herself lost. Again.

"Dracco, location of Queen Rozhenko?"

"Deck four, section sixteen." There was a beeping noise and Janeway cocked her head to the side, wondering what it was. She didn't have long to wait. "Do you require further instruction, Captain Janeway? You have requested that information eight times now." Kathryn jumped.

"Am I speaking to a computer or a person?"

"This is the Dracco. You are speaking to a computer."

"Pretty smart for a computer," Janeway mumbled.

"Thank you. I repeat: do you require further instruction on reaching your destination?"

"If you would be so kind..." Kathryn said, smiling at the politeness of the Shashan computer.

"If you follow the corridor in the opposite direction you are currently facing, then turn left three times, followed by a right, it is the fourth door on your right."

"Thank you."

"You are welcome, Captain Janeway."

"How do you know who I am?"

"Your biosignature is monitored as a normal function of this computer."

"Oh." Kathryn said, and then followed the Dracco's directions, rather than trying to decipher the signs that she had been following previously. In what was obviously the wrong direction. She found the door that the computer had specified and tried to make out the writing on it. She recognized a couple of numbers that she had learned to identify, but nothing else made sense. There was no helpful picture to indicate what was beyond the door, unless three diagonal slashes counted. In Janeway's opinion, the sign was unhelpful.

She stepped through the door and immediately wished that the sign had been more obvious. The heat wave hit her first, followed by a cloud of steam, then she was able to make out a single, nude body in the mist. Jessica turned from her shower and Kathryn started to apologize.

"It's fine. The showers are public, Captain. I don't expect privacy. Although, this crew seems to give me it in abundance." Kathryn felt as if she were choking in the heat and suddenly remembered that Luui had said Shashans preferred colder temperatures, as Jessica walked forward, her entire body burned red.

"I thought your people didn't like the heat?" Kathryn said and Jessica's gaze became distant.

"I'm just trying to get clean." Jessica walked past Janeway, who felt a pang of worry about the girl, recalling everything that she had seen of her. The scars were patches of white against the rosy skin, drawing Kathryn's eyes, which she was trying desperately to fix on the girl's head. But her eyes noticed a scar she just couldn't ignore. It wasn't thick, or horrendous in any way beyond its location. Jessica caught Kathryn's eye and her naked belly jerked in a harsh laugh, bringing Janeway's eyes up.

"I'd say I'm sorry, but it just doesn't seem enough."

"That happened when I was eight. I was wasted in the streets of New York, cold, hungry. Trying to hide who I was, what I was. I was a girl, all alone, trying to be a boy to save my life."

"New York?"

"Maybe it was St. Louis. The alleys all looked the same and I'm not sure when or how I got from one to the other." Jessica was toweling off as she spoke, her eyes vacant.

"On Earth?"

"Not your Earth. It's a long story and I only have time right now for one. Matters of State call me away. Anyway, I think I was fucked up on heroin… it might have been crack. I was fried, either way. The gang I hung out with—I lived with—were horsing around, comparing scars and stories. It came my turn—or rather, Jesse's turn. It was close enough to my name that I answered to it.

"I didn't have any scars really. Just the chest one. That was about to change, though I didn't know it. I wasn't about to show them my chest, since I already had to wrap it up and wear loose shirts. So I showed them a few cat scratches and they got to joking around, said maybe I had one somewhere else. I got into a fight with one of them and he ripped my shirt during it, ACE bandage and all.

"Well, Jesse wasn't supposed to have a pair and there was no doubt that I wasn't Jesse at that moment. These guys were complete fuckers, but they usually didn't do rape, that's why I hung out with them. They decided that I'd be the exception. That scar was a sick fetish one of the younger ones had, courtesy of my own knife." Jessica's eyes were dark, but glassy as she finished up. They stood there for a minute, neither saying anything, Janeway completely horrified.

"But I've seen you fight..." Jessica looked at Janeway.

"Things were different back then. I was no different from a human child, just as weak. Just as helpless." Silence followed again and Jessica just clutched the towel, having forgotten about it. Finally, Janeway thought of a question.

"When did you grow up?" Janeway asked and Jessica looked at her like she'd finally said something interesting.

"Nineteen-eighty to nineteen-eighty-nine, Earth. No home, no family, no prayer—all my fault."

"Nothing like that can be anyone's fault." Kathryn said, angrily.

"If I'd stayed with my adoptive family, I would have had a mother, father, sister and little brother. But 'Daddy' remarried a bitch and I'd chosen to live with him, because of my foster sister, Janet. Janet became my zhanal, when Tasha died, to save me. I was five when the change hit me through the time difference. It took four years and I almost went insane. Janet was Patrick's daughter and so she stayed with him.

"My real sisters went with April, lived an easy life. Patrick married this bitch named Judith. She hated me, because I wasn't a dress and dolls little girl. Patrick also kept Mikey, the son he and April had together. Judith loved Janet, who was into dolls and makeup and got along great with our new big sister, Andria. I didn't. Daddy loved me, I was his princess, his son and his friend. But all that can change so easily, trust is such a fragile thing." Jessica looked away, tears rolling down her face. "I just couldn't play the game and Judith hated me for it and was jealous of the time Patrick spent with me."

Jessica pulled on her clothes, quickly. She stepped out into the hall and Kathryn followed. They walked in silence to a lift, where Jessica only spoke to give it a destination. Janeway didn't know what to say. She felt angry, concerned and sympathetic. She also understood why Jessica didn't feel clean.

"What happened?" She finally prompted.

"Hmm?" Jessica asked, her head shooting up. "Judith won." The lift came to a stop and Jessica led the way to an important looking room. The young Shashan walked to a console and picked up a data crystal. She inserted it into the console and began scanning through information. Janeway didn't want to pry any more, but her curiosity was about to burst. Forcing it down, she opened her mouth to begin her request when Jessica pulled out the data crystal and handed it to her.

"What's this?" Janeway asked, looking down.

"Shashan laws, regulations and disciplinary codes as well as governmental structure. You were going to ask for those, correct?"

"Yes, how did you—" Kathryn stopped herself, thinking, 'of course.'

"I was in Starfleet, remember? I know the procedures on visiting a foreign culture for the first time. Our cultural database is free for you to download, if you instruct whomever you like on your ship to extract the information. Belief systems, code of honor and literature, of course. Also musical history, government history, racial history, all the history any anthropologist could desire is yours to peruse."

"Is there anything I can offer you in return?" Janeway asked, ever the diplomat.

"Your friendship. Your word that you won't attempt to assassinate me or mine and your assurances that you and your people will abide by our laws and regulations, lest they be punished by our legal system." Kathryn looked dubious about the last part. "Don't worry, capital punishment is a choice only to murders and rapists. And it is the criminal's choice. Misdemeanors are punishable by fines, community services and jail. So unless one of your crewmembers kills or rapes someone, and we're telepaths, so there's almost never a mistake in the justice department, then the worst that they will be forced to do is sit in a jail cell for the time that they are on this planet. No longer."

"Well, I think that I can give you my word, then. I'll make sure that everyone is made aware of this. But you must understand that if I find that you have deceived me in any way, or your disciplinary actions aren't as you say..."

"Yeah, yeah. I've heard it all a million times before. I've been threatened with war, blight, death and most interestingly, carnivorous, tribble-like creatures." Jessica seemed to think about that last one for a moment, then she shook it of with a laugh as she walked to sit in front of a computer screen. "Anything else?"

"No, I think you covered it," Janeway said, smiling.

"Then, not to be rude, but I have about four-hundred worlds to look after."

"Four hundred?" Kathryn exclaimed. "The Federation is only comprised of one-hundred and fifty!" Jessica looked up.

"I know. Sometimes I wish I was the Federation President instead of Queen of the Shashan Empire. Doesn't 'Empire' sound like the wrong term for a government headed by a queen and her Council?" Kathryn's jaw didn't seem to want to close. Jessica grinned. "I only actually own two-hundred and thirteen of those worlds. The other..." Jessica calculated. "hundred eighty-some are actually run by their own governments, they're just a part of the Empire, for protection and trade. We're not quite as picky as the Federation, but we do demand that citizens be given certain basic inalienable rights. Any planet caught violating that agreement is cut out of the Empire and sometimes annexed to protect the people."

"Annexed?"

"Not like an Occupation, but rather in the traditional sense. We drive away the corrupt government and help the people form a working, healthy government. We're often in the role of 'Robin Hood.' If we're given a request for help, we don't ignore it just because their government says no. If a planet petitions us to join, it's my job to decide whether to say yea or nay. It doesn't happen that often, really and I use my Council to help decide such matters. Anyway, that's all in that little crystal I gave you. Please?"

"Of course. Good day... your Highness," Kathryn said as she left. She heard something hit the doors as they closed behind her and she chuckled.

Present...

Seven awoke in Ensign Kim's quarters, confused and nursing a hangover. Her head pounded and her stomach lurched in pain. She sat up and looked around.

"Harry?" She asked, loudly. Within seconds, a bleary-eyed Kim walked into the room, rubbing the sleep out of his face.

"Morning, Seven. How do you feel?"

"I feel ill. What happened last night?" Harry sat on the bed next to Seven and yawned.

"You got drunk and passed out." He answered, trying to smooth his hair as he realized that he probably looked like hell. Seven didn't look much better, her hair sticking out wildly, her eyes puffy and her lips dry. Harry didn't notice, though and only saw her as the kind of person who woke up as perfect as she spent the day.

"Did we copulate?"

"No, I wouldn't take advantage of you like that," Harry answered.

"But I recall that I asked you to do so."

"And I said no. I don't think that we're ready to have sex yet."

"But this is an experience I wish to have." Seven said, surprising Harry a little. He had thought that Seven only wanted to have sex because she was drunk. He started to get a little angry.

"I won't be used as an experiment, Seven." A look of concern passed mildly over her face as she read the hurt in his voice.

"This is not an experiment, Harry. I simply desire to release the tension that has been building within me. I was under the impression that two individuals became a couple with this purpose intended."

"It's more than that, Seven. Even sex should be more than that."

"You are referring to love?"

"Yeah. I mean, a lot of people just have sex, but that's not a real relationship. Not if there's no feeling involved. And I know that you don't love me, no matter how much I care about you."

"How can you know that I do not love you?"

"Your eyes. You once referred to love as a disease, and I don't know if you still feel that way about it—"

"I do not. I feel that it is a condition for which there is no cure."

"But still—just by saying 'cure,' you're making it into a problem, not something to cherish, which it is."

"But it can be a problem," Seven said, a little confused.

"When?"

"When it is not reciprocated. Or if two or more people love the same individual." Harry couldn't argue and he didn't know what to say. "I believe that it may feel wonderful, but it can also be devastating and debilitating. Your own experience with Tal, for example."

"One of many," Harry agreed. "But that doesn't mean that you should hide from it. Believe me, the benefits far outweigh the disadvantages."

"I believe you," Seven said, recalling how happy she was when B'Elanna was with her.

"What is it, Seven?" Harry asked, noticing the slight smile that came to her lips.

"What?"

"Have you... ever... been in love?" Harry asked, unsure that he wanted the answer.

"I..." Seven looked down as she trailed off, giving Harry his answer.

"You're still in love," Harry laid back on the bed. He brought his hands to his face and rubbed, as if trying to push away his bad luck in love. Seven sat quietly, her hands in her lap, looking at nothing. Harry set his hands on his stomach and stared at the ceiling, cursing the day he decided to join Starfleet.

"Do you wish to end our relationship?" Seven asked quietly. Harry opened his mouth to say yes.

"No." Harry wondered what the hell he was doing. Seven turned her beautiful blue eyes on him, turning her head to the side slightly in curiosity and he sat up, meeting her lips with his. He felt her breath catch. She kissed him back, pressing him down to the bed. He pushed her away a little. "Just promise me something."

"What?' she asked, only slightly suspicious.

"That you'll never lie to me." Seven brushed his hair away from his forehead, enjoying the soft texture of the short style. She looked into his dark eyes, hurt and pleading. She pressed her lips to his again.

"I promise." He ran his fingers through her long, silken hair and just had one more request.

"Promise me something else."

"Yes?"

"Don't call out their name."

To be continued…