Hey pple! I'm back after my A-levels! I just ended today, so don't sue me for not updating! By the way, I just have to mention that Kuroro is rather OC because if he wasn't, it wouldn't be fun for me anymore. Those who mind it, I'm sorry, even though the truth is I really do like the Kuroro in Hunter X Hunter. It's all meant to be satirical, mocking… blah… whatever. Just read and enjoy!

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The world swirled and danced in shades of blue and green as she tumbled through the air. Closing her eyes, she groaned miserably, feeling her guts rise to the challenge (and to her mouth). She had to be dead, was convinced she was dead. Opening her eyes, she stared into a pale, tattooed face that was inches from her nose. It smirked, giggled, and called her cute. Groaning, she closed her eyes again. Ok, she was definitely dead, and this was hell, and the devil had appeared with Hisoka's face.

"Machi?"

"If you have to come, don't use Hisoka! Why must you torment me like this! I'm dead already!"

"Machi, stop struggling. I'm losing grip."

"You've already lost your grip! Why? Tell me why? What have I done? Is it too late to repent? If it's not, I'm totally, utterly sorry that I once stole Shizuku's make-up and used it to powder Shalnark's face!"

"Machi, open your eyes."

He was being too serious, she decided. She had never heard Hisoka sound so serious in her entire life. Of course, technically, this was the devil, not Hisoka… never Hisoka. Gingerly, she opened her eyes and stared as she took in the most awkward situation she had ever been in, including the time when Nobunaga, all drunk and high on alcohol, had tried to propose to Dancho who had dragged her in by hiding behind her, causing Nobunaga to challenge her to a duel for the 'lady's' hand in marriage.

They were dangling in mid-air – or rather, Hisoka was dangling in mid-air while holding on to her. The only thing that separated them from an inevitable fall to death was the thread of pink nen now stuck to the cliff. It originated, she realized a little guiltily, from two broken fingers that belonged to said devil.

"Oh… well, what do you know," she muttered, "we're not dead yet. Woo-hoo. God, I wish I was dead…. Whatever. Can you pull us up?"

He pulled a puppy face. It almost broke her heart, almost, but not quite (adults who pull puppy faces generally do not make hearts break, but scientists have shown that they may be one of the main factors contributing to the sudden upsurge in the number of lunatics). "That's not the least of our problems," he pouted, "I'm Changing Type, like you, so when my nen gets too far from me, it… weakens."

Machi clutched to his shirt nervously as she stared up. The combined weight of both of them was dragging the nen downwards, stretching it thin like chewing gum, which it technically was. "My nen wouldn't work either," she muttered, "at the length from here to the nearest foothold, it would only be as strong as cotton."

She felt his muscles tensing, bunching as he struggled to maintain hold of both the nen and her. "Now, isn't this day getting even more interesting?" he giggled crazily, the pitch a little higher than usual, "My, my. And I thought we wouldn't have any fun hunting purple lizards. Dancho definitely has good taste when it comes to selecting missions." He licked his lips, but she had the feeling he was doing it more out of nervousness than anything else. (And to think she knew him so well…)

"Well… then… what do we do? Is there anyway to lessen the weight… without any of us going off the edge, that is?"

For a moment, she swore she saw nervousness… real nervousness flicker over his face. "Actually…" he hesitated, "Yes."

"If you dare suggest I drop…"

"Of course not," he smiled at her cheerily, "Then there's no fun being in the Genei Ryodan anymore."

"Then what?" she snarled, deliberately avoiding his eyes.

"Well," he started, "well, first you've got to listen to where they all are."

All Machi could do was stare as he smiled back at her.

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"Right… right…" Feitan mumbled, trying desperately not the swallow anymore lake water, "we are out here doing what, Shalnark? Other than trying to get water drunkenness that is?"

"Oh… well, Dancho said to meet in the middle of the map…" he smiled sweetly as he clung helplessly to the one meter of rock in the middle of nowhere, "and well… here we are."

"And he is meeting us for?" Phinx demanded.

"The Words."

"The words?"

"With the capital W!" Kuroro suddenly materialized behind them, puffing and panting, and spitting water out as he clung onto the rock for dear life, "Dork!"

"Hello, Ubogin," Shizuku mumbled, sidling to a stop between him and Shalnark, "We found the Words."

"Words?" Ubogin floated thoughtfully, as lumps of dirt swam around him, the alternative being too horrible to imagine. "As in Books?"

"Shakespeare, Ubo, Shakespeare," Kuroro replied, "We found Shakespeare in the forests!"

"Hasn't he been dead for some time?" Feitan asked curiously, lifting his head backwards to avoid his mask filling with water.

"Alternative theory is that he went back to Mars," Phinx replied.

"Not Shakespeare as in Shakespeare," Kuroro snapped, "his works! His Words! Shakespeare's Words!"

"How on earth do you find Words in the middle of…"

"Don't ask, Feitan," Shizuku said seriously, "Dancho is getting angry. You can tell by the way the number of wrinkles around his eyes increased."

"Well what about it?" Phinx asked impatiently, "Why did you call us all here for Words?"

"Time for Nen theory 101," Shalnark perked up happily, "It is said that when a person puts all his heart and soul into making something, he actually pours nen into it, regardless of whether he knows nen or not. Sometimes, the older it gets, the stronger the nen gets. That's why sometimes people get lost in old libraries, and why old grannies tell you never to eat old food… and why you should never, ever anger elderly citizens."

"How elderly is elderly?" Shizuku asked (because she felt rather faded due to her minimal dialogue.)

"Elderly enough to have wrinkles, I suppose…"

"Oh! That means Ubogin is elderly! No wonder Nobunaga said never to anger him."

"Was that an insult? Did you just insult me? Did you just call me elderly? Did Nobunaga call me elderly?"

"Wait… in that case, does Dancho count as elderly?"

"I so do not!"

"Anyway," Shalnark piped up, irritating creeping into his voice, "Shakespeare's Words are old, so the chance that they have some sort of nen in them is quite probable. We are now at the Jug's Lake, which has more or less maintained its primitive state. Thus, when something with strong nen is introduced to it, things could happen."

"Especially this!" Kuroro flourished the scraps of paper.

"What? Materialized paper shredders?"

"No!" Kuroro thrust the piece of paper in Phinx's face. "Look! See! Observe!"

"Ohmigawd!" Phinx gasped, "What's it?"

"Oh for heaven's sake…" Shalnark took the scraps, rolling his eyes, "Let me see… hey! These are bite marks, Dancho!"

"Precisely!" Kuroro smiled. "Something ate the Words!"

"This could mean…" The sentence was broken off by a high-pitched shriek from a distance away. "That."

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"Left pocket."

"Lots of Aces. Diamonds, spades… hearts."

"Right pocket."

"One full stack?"

"Yeah. Eh… check my sleeves."

"Right. Whole pile of diamonds in the left and… whole pile of hearts in the right. I noticed you don't carry clubs."

"I do. Down my shirt, and in my wristbands."

"Oh… I guess I should be apologizing for this… I mean, putting my hand down your shirt…"

"Of course you don't need to (giggle). The next place to search is much more awkward – the seat of my pants."

"What the… Die Hisoka!"

"You're choking me… stop… stop… I'll search myself!"

"I've always thought you were a little weird, Hisoka, but now I know I was wrong. You are totally weird… All those were in your pants? Who keeps a pile of jokers in the seat of their pants?"

"Well, the cardboard boxes back at HQ are rather hard to sit on you know?"

"Save me the details. Where else?"

"My stockings and my heels, I suppose."

"Stockings? You know, I always thought those were tights, not stockings. Hisoka, you are the only man I know who wears heels and stockings."

"Well, I've always been in touch with my feminine side. Besides, I prefer to look down on people than be looked down on. It must have something to do with my poor, deprived childhood when…"

"Shut up, jerk… what the hell! How on earth do you stuff all this into your clothes?"

"Law of Anime. A character can pull anything out of anywhere at anytime."

"I must have missed that one out in college."

Machi finally straightened up and shifted into a more comfortable position. "That was hell, Hisoka," she stated, "next time, you take out all your cards yourself. I even saw one that was had a life of its own! It waved its tentacles at me!"

"Ah… those that I've forgotten about and left in my shoes I suppose."

"Gross!" Machi proceeded to wipe her hands on his shirt. "Disgusting jerk!" Done fuming, she looked away from him and stared resolutely at the whole island of cards floating below them. "No wonder your nen can't take our weight," she muttered, "For a moment there, I thought my diet had failed."

"Eh, Machi?"

"What?"

"That may have been the case. We've got a little problem. Do look up."

"What?" Machi turned her head up, and her blood froze (i.e. because of what she saw). The nen had been stretched till it was thinner than thread and it was still stretching. "Oh no!" she moaned, "Not like this! I don't want to go like this! Not with you by my side etc!"

Before Hisoka could comment, the nen broke and they fell down, down, down, into a sort of darkness that was incomprehensible to those who live in the light.