Disclaimer: I am not making any money of this fic, nor do I own Star Trek: Voyager, Deep Space Nine, The Next Generation or the original series, or anything else I make references to. If you saw the character on any show, then it is not mine. The same goes for ships, planets, cultures, et cetera. This story will depict a loving relationship between two women and there are no apologies to be made over this. Chapter 17 title is from "Letting the Cables Sleep" by Bush.

Genre: Action-Adventure, Drama
Codes: K/7, T/7

Feedback: Please, reviews are the food of the muse… but flames are for candles!

Home, Chapter 17
Silence is not the way...

At first, no one moved, and then Seven and Spacey stood to leave. They walked alone to the door, Anna looking back over her shoulder and Seven staring straight ahead. After the doors hissed closed, B'Elanna turned to Jessica.

"You married Luii?" Jessica smiled slightly.

"Yeah. Four years ago, just after I turned sixteen. Bendon threw a hissy fit, but didn't push the issue, since he didn't want to give up his harem."

"He has a harem?" B'Elanna asked, raising her eyebrows. "Isn't that a little... I mean, considering that he—"

"He's a sick puppy, yeah. But all the males from Morina's harem ended up either celibate or whores, depending on the boy."

"I just can't believe that you let him have one," Harry commented. Jessica looked at him and there was something in her eyes that bothered him.

"I can't demand what I won't offer," she said. Kathryn noticed that there was a sad tinge to the words, as though Jessica wished it were different.

"What about Alexander?" Harry asked. Jessica shook her head.

"I told you years ago that he was going to leave me. I wasn't wrong. When the Dominion War began he ran off to Qo'noS to be Klingon, as I knew he eventually would. We're still married and he writes to me, letting me know what's happening. I found it amusing when his father married my zhanal at first. I was glad that she was happy, right up until the day she died. Alexander and I haven't seen each other but once since. Of course, I didn't talk to hardly anyone for almost half a year after she was killed, so that didn't help our marriage any. He still writes and visits our children, but only when I'm not there."

"I'm so sorry," B'Elanna said and Jessica smiled weakly. "I know that..." Jessica sighed a little when B'Elanna trailed off.

"Yeah. Still have two zhanals, Janet and Salir, but Zia was... yeah. Alex became withdrawn afterwards, too. He was at his father's wedding to her and, like anyone who got to know her, he considered her a friend. The truth is, Luii is the only one of my husbands that still spends a considerable amount of time with me. In fact, this past fortnight is the first time we've been apart for longer than a day since we were married. Bendon is still one of my best friends, and I love Alex, but Luii is the only one who doesn't treat me like I'm dying. The fact that I am, being a moot point, he treats me the same as he did in the beginning."

"And your sisters?" Chakotay asked. Jessica looked down and a tear fell from her eye, never actually touching her cheek.

"Jennette died first. She was in a coma for less than a month. Jessamyn was the one who fought the longest. Not surprising, considering that she's been fighting everything and everyone her entire life. She saw our twentieth birthday, but died a month later at her own hand when she showed the first signs of the final stage. Luii performed the separation from her zhanal first. I wasn't there, but he told me that she was just as stubborn in her final moments as the day he met her."

"So when did you start going white?" Harry asked, shocking Kathryn a little, since the question sounded callous. But Jessica just looked amused and grateful.

"Well, I noticed my first white hair when I was nineteen, but I only had a streak until one day five months ago. I woke up totally white, except for my claws, which were only grey at the time. But enough about me, what's been up with you guys these past six years?"
…

Jessica followed B'Elanna into the ambassador's suite, after checking with Sickbay to discover that her daughter was unchanged. The shorter girl looked around at her accommodations and sighed.

"You don't like them?" B'Elanna asked, walking over to plop down on the couch. Jessica shrugged.

"They're too clean." B'Elanna laughed and stood as an idea struck her.

"You wait here," she said as she ran out the door. Jessica looked, puzzled, at the doors as they closed, amused by her friend's exuberance. B'Elanna was only gone a few minutes, then returned, carrying two picture frames under one arm and a bag under the other. Jessica, who had settled on the couch, rose to see what B'Elanna had.

"Whassat?" she slurred, peering at the pictures, which were turned away.

"These? Just some things I picked up back on Shaola. The bag is for you to use now, though." With that, she tossed the bag to Jessica, who peeked inside and began laughing. She looked around, then began pulling the clothes from the sack and tossing them about. B'Elanna grinned as the room went from being shipshape to a disaster area in a few seconds.

"Now let me see the paintings," Jess said, grinning. B'Elanna revealed the paintings to be of Jessica. One was in the heat of battle, her mien ferocious; the other she appeared as a pensive child. Jessica burst out laughing. "You actually bought these? The blue one doesn't even look like me," she added, sticking out her tongue. B'Elanna chuckled and went to hang them on the walls. Jessica lounged on the couch, watching. When B'Elanna was satisfied, she sat down next to Jessica, who put her ankles in the engineer's lap.

"Tell me why you didn't fuck Tom," B'Elanna dropped, almost casually.

"What?"

"Don't give me that. I saw how you looked at him. He was a free one-night stand and I know that he came onto you on the Dracco. But he told me that you turned him down, flat. I know that you usually only have sex with people that you're going to see regularly, that you think you might fall in love with. But I also know that you slept with Chakotay and protest all you like, you didn't really love him, you both just needed it."

"Sometimes I wonder if you're part telepath, Bel. I had a vision, alright?" Jessica rolled on her side and glared at the floor. "It was like a double image, like he was marked to be yours. I saw it in his heart that he would love you. I saw your mark upon his cheek. And when I looked at you with him, I saw... well, something happened that prevented that, but I saw you wearing his ring, carrying his child. Maybe it was just a peek into another life, but I saw you loving him."

"And you knew that I wouldn't have given him a chance if he'd slept with you." Jessica nodded and B'Elanna hugged her. "Thank you." Jessica shrugged, but smiled briefly.

"You can thank me by not being such a chicken shit about Seven."

"Excuse me?" B'Elanna asked, glaring at Jessica.

"Oh, yeah, because you're not screaming 'I love Seven' with every breath you take. Well, not literally, of course. But I can smell it, I can see it and feel it when you're near her."

"She's dating my best friend." B'Elanna spat out.

"For crap's sake, Bel, I know that you would have found any reason possible not to date Tom. Hell, you damn well nearly did. But Seven's not the same and you know it. If you hadn't fucked that up, she might already be with you."

"You're a bitch, you know that?"

"And you're a coward." B'Elanna bristled for a moment, but Jessica met her eyes and she conceded.

"All right, I love her. Are you happy?"

"Are you?" B'Elanna clutched the arm of her couch and bit back tears.

"How can I be happy when the person I love is climbing all over my best friend? I don't know how to let her know that I love her, I didn't even know until it was too late. All right, maybe I did, but I didn't really realize it! How can I make up for that? Is it worth it? Does she even love me?" B'Elanna asked, the words pouring out of her mouth almost faster than her mind could finish forming coherent thoughts. She looked at Jess for answers.

"Now, now, that would be telling. All I'm saying is that if you love her: help her. Nothing more."

"And how am I supposed to do that?" B'Elanna asked, angrily wiping away the tear that had managed to make its way down her cheek.

"Touch her."

"What?" B'Elanna looked askance at Jessica.

"Something I've noticed, is that no one touches her except the captain, but even she touches her less than she touches other members of the crew. Even Harry keeps a distance from her."

"He touches her," B'Elanna said, bitterly.

"He fucks her, B'Elanna. He even makes love to her, but that's different from just simple, platonic touch. I know that Shashans are extremely intimate to you, always in contact with another person, but humans need physical contact as well. If they don't get it, especially early in life, it can cause physical paranoia, social anxiety, autism in children and…"

"Okay, okay, I get the point. I should touch her. But how? I never touch anyone myself." B'Elanna said, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning back.

"You touch me." Jessica said simply. B'Elanna's eyes widened.

"Yeah, but you need it."

"So does Seven. She's feeling isolated and outcast, I know that you know how that feels. If you really love her, give her what even her lover can't. She's trapped in a world where the minds around her are distant and alien, not calm and ordered, joined with hers, like she's known for years and years. I know that if I went mind-blind, I'd go insane from the silence."

"You're already insane," B'Elanna joked. Jessica smiled. "Should I just brush against her, like I do with you? Touch her shoulders, what?" B'Elanna blushed. "It's embarrassing to verbalize these things," she muttered.

"You sound like Seven," Jessica said with a grin. B'Elanna smiled. "Do what feels natural, but remember to keep your romantic feelings out of it. You lost her; that's your own fault. Don't glare at me, you've said it yourself." Jessica tapped her own head gently. "Just make contact. She needs it. If you love her, don't let her be alone."

"When did you get so smart?" B'Elanna growled jokingly.

"Who's smart? I'm a telepath and Mama's a shrink, remember? I'm all kinds of cheating," Jessica answered with a wink.
…

Harry looked at Seven, who was lying on her side, not facing him. They only seemed to fulfill a physical need with their copulation, never anything emotional. Indeed, he could see how mindless it was between them sometimes. There was the passion of lust and physical attraction, but it was... empty somehow.

He just couldn't stand it, but he still didn't want to give her up.

Suddenly and completely unexpectedly, Jessica burst into his bedroom, rolled her eyes and the next thing he knew, he was naked, Seven having snatched the sheets for herself. He dove off the side of the bed and peeked over at Jessica.

"Come on, baby face, it's nothing I haven't seen before. Get your cute little ass in some clothes, we're taking a walk."

"You don't just burst into someone's quarters uninvited, Jess, sheesh." Harry said as he reached for some pants.

"Yes I do. Now hurry up, life is short." Jessica winked at Seven, who raised her ocular implant and the sheets at the same time. She couldn't help noticing that something was different about the woman now. She looked positively youthful, despite the obvious age marks of her race.

Seven expected to be enraged at having the crone burst into the room, just after her sexual act, but she wasn't. She was actually entertained as she watched Harry scramble into his clothes. Although she was a bit irritated at the words the Shashan chose and the fact that Harry was so quick to comply. She focused on that emotion—annoyance—to fortify her opinion that 'they' could not be trusted or be befriended. She was determined not to like the changeling woman.

Jessica seemed to sense this because she raised her own eyebrow back at Seven, although her expression was vaguely amused. Harry looked at Seven, as though for permission and she felt a moment of triumph against the convivial woman. Seven nodded and the two left her to her thoughts, which were mostly on Voyager's Chief Engineer.
…

"What did you want to talk about?" Harry asked Jessica as they walked up the corridor.

"You're a pig, Harry. You know that, right?" Harry sighed.

"This is about Seven."

"No, it's about the curly tail you seem to have sprouted in my absence. What the hell are you thinking?"

"What, you don't know?" Harry kept his eyes fixed on the floor as he walked, but the irritation in his voice was directed more at himself than his companion. He knew that she was waiting for him to keep talking, that the question was rhetorical. She couldn't be asking if she didn't know. "Did you ever consider being a psychologist?"

"I hate shrinks. Answer the question."

"Your adoptive mother is a counselor."

"That's not her fault. Besides, she's not one of the pricks. Now tell me why you're doing this to both of you, rather, all three of you?" Harry shook his head.

"I don't know. Maybe it's because I've got such bad judgment when it comes to women. I can't seem to do anything right. We were getting along so well, developing a friendship and it's no secret that I've had a crush on her from the moment I saw her. Am I a jerk?"

"No. If you want me to psychoanalyze you, I might have to just smack you."

"But you're so good at it," Harry said, giving her a grin. Jessica sighed.

"All right. It's Tom."

"Tom's dead."

"Exactly. You miss him and you think that you can make up for that emptiness by going against your own nature, behaving as he would. In this case, having sex with someone that you know doesn't love you, can't love you. And whom you honestly don't love, at least, not in a forever way. But may I say, that if you're going to emulate your dead best friend, get it right. Tom was a good guy at heart, just like you are. He may have slept around, but he never got involved in a relationship that was detrimental to the emotional well-being of either member."

"You only met him for about a week, how could you possibly know that?" Harry stopped and turned to Jessica, a little surprised that her words rang true in his mind. Jessica stopped and looked at Harry intensely.

"When I met your crew, you were the only member on real speaking terms with Tom. And you know how I have a thing for outcasts. I talked to him quite a bit, even got to know him enough to see that he wasn't the asshole that most of your crew saw him as at the time. I think that the manner of his death proves that, though." Jessica turned around and started walking again. Harry followed, musing over her words.

"So what should I do?"

"You already know that. You've been trying to convince your idiot half to do it for weeks now. It has to come from you to mean anything, though. I'm just telling you what you already know, but don't have the balls to admit." Harry kept walking for a while, his head down, thinking about what Jessica had told him.

"But don't you think—" Harry realized suddenly that he was alone. He looked around, and then sighed at Jessica's vanishing act. After all, it wasn't the first time he'd experienced it. "You know, that's really annoying," he growled to the air. He kept walking to his quarters, rehearsing what he should say until he was satisfied, but when he got there, Seven was gone.
…

"Is that the... Jessica you spoke of in one of our previous conversations?" B'Elanna jumped at the sudden interruption of her work.

"Um, yeah." B'Elanna stood up, rubbing the part of her head she had managed to bang when she was startled. "Why do you ask?"

"Do you know her nature?" Seven asked, almost demanding.

"How do you mean? On this ship, I'm probably the person who knows her best, although Harry spent more time with her." B'Elanna put away the hyper-spanner and searched out a sonic cutter.

"When did that occur?"

"When he was a cadet. They went to Starfleet Academy together." Seven raised her ocular implant.

"She is in Starfleet?" Confusion and doubt began riddling the ex-drone's mind. B'Elanna decided that since Seven was scared of Jessica because she didn't know her, knowledge would alleviate some of the fear that the blonde was radiating.

"Was. She resigned just before the Dominion War, saying that Starfleet was changing and she was sick and tired of conspiracies. Also, she knew that war was coming and she didn't agree with any of it, so she left, rather than be used as a pawn."

"Is she not too old to have been of much use to Starfleet?"

"Old? Jessica's only twenty years old, Seven. She's sick and that's why she looks old." B'Elanna sat down, her legs aching from remaining in a squatting position for too long. When she sat, she made sure that she was touching Seven, as Jessica had suggested. Seven was a little surprised by the contact, but found it pleasing and did nothing to impede it.

"If she is sick, isn't the captain afraid of contagion? Because of their mutable nature, disease in—"

"It's not a disease, Seven. She has what's called Vaggimort Syndrome, okay? She's going to die, and very soon. She probably won't live out the month." B'Elanna had to bite back the tears that threatened to spill as she confessed to Seven what she, herself, didn't want to believe. "It comes from conception in an infertile Shashan woman. She had five identical siblings who are all dead now and she's about to join them."

Seven noticed the change in B'Elanna's posture, pheromone production and the rush of heat to the woman's face and immediately missed the contact that B'Elanna had just severed with her shift in position. She also noted that her friend was distressed by the information that she was providing and Seven recalled everything that the Klingon had told her previously about Jessica. Some of the anxiety she had been experiencing vanished and she put her hand briefly on B'Elanna's shoulder.

"Thank you for answering my query."

B'Elanna was startled by the expression of gratitude and managed to say, "You're welcome," before Seven disappeared around the corner.

Seven walked into the Mess Hall for her midday nutritional supplement and stepped into the line of people being served by Neelix, who was grinning and offering his opinion on each of the dishes offered. Seven found them all unappealing and walked over to the replicator to order Nutritional Supplement 85.

"Hey, Borg," Crewman Gerron called. "Wanna sit with us?" Seven shook with rage and hurt for a moment, then remembered something that her parents had once told her, long ago. 'Just let them get to know you and they'll see what a wonderful person you are.' Seven looked at her plate, then walked slowly to the table, ready to run at the first cutting remark.

"Hi, Seven," Jennifer Delaney said, smiling slightly, while maintaining a confused expression due to the ex-drone's acceptance of their invitation. It was well known that Seven usually ate alone. It was not well known that rarely did anyone offer to share his or her table with her.

"What're you eating? More nutritional supplements?" Seven looked at Gerron warily and nodded. "What do they taste like?"

"They taste... pleasant." Seven selected her words carefully, trying to fit in. Ensign Brooks snickered. Seven forced herself not to blush. Perhaps this was a bad idea. "I find that Mr. Neelix does not season the food he prepares efficiently. He often 'overdoes' it."

"Yes, he does," Brooks said. "Nice to see that you're trying to be a little more normal. Maybe you'll even start fitting in."

"Perhaps," Seven said, not believing the Ensign, but not wanting to be contradictory.

"So, are you going to the hoverball match on Thursday?" Seven started to reply to Delaney, but Gerron answered the question. Seven closed her mouth, assuming that she was not being addressed.

"I think that Engineering's got a better chance than Security, with Lt. Torres on their team."

Seven decided she had something to contribute, thankfully, and offered, "B'Elanna is an excellent competitor. I have had the privilege of playing hoverball with her on several occasions. I agree that she will be an asset to her team."

"Well if the Borg's betting on Engineering, then it would probably be the team to go with," Brooks said. Seven raised her ocular implant.

"I do not gamble," she contradicted, making them all laugh, much to her indignation, which she didn't express.

"All the more reassuring," Gerron said, grinning. Seven began eating again, deciding to ignore the jokes obviously aimed at her.

"I dunno, what would a Borg know about hoverball? I doubt that there's a team in the Collective. Torres was probably just humoring her, letting her play. Maybe even let her win a game or two. Although, isn't being part machine technically cheating?" Jennifer added. Seven swallowed her food with difficulty and decided that she had had enough. She was about to stand when she saw a white shape out of the corner of her eye. Jessica sat down next to her and she almost bolted.

"Hi, Humans," Jessica greeted, a malicious glint in her eye. "Bajoran," Jessica added, nodding to Brooks, who was obviously half-Bajoran from the ridges on his nose, although he didn't wear the earring that his people traditionally sported.

"Okay," laughed Gerron, a quizzical expression on his face. "Hi, Jessica. How are you?"

"I'm good. Aren't you supposed to be on duty?" Jess asked and Gerron shook his head. "Oh, I heard that you skipped your duty shifts when the mood hit you. Hey, don't hit me for saying that," Jessica feigned hiding behind Seven's arm. Seven wondered what the young woman was up to. Gerron looked confused. "So who are the Delaney sisters sleeping with this week?"

"Hey!" Jennifer yelled. "I'm sitting right here."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know that Humans had such good hearing. Also, I thought it was okay to talk rudely about someone right in front of them. Hmm, wonder where I got that idea?" Jennifer looked at her plate and went quiet. Gerron didn't catch the not so subtle hint.

"Why do you keep calling us by our species? We have names, you know." He looked, offended, at Jessica.

"Oh, my mistake. I thought that was how you identified each other now. Affectionate or something."

"No, and I'm human, too, not just Bajoran," Brooks growled.

"Well, since you looked more Bajoran, I just supposed that you would be called one."

"I preferred to be called Mikel," Brooks responded.

"And I'm Gerron."

"What do you liked to be called?" Jessica asked Seven.

"Seven," answered the startled woman.

"Okay, so everyone has a name. And I take it no one likes being called a slut or a lazy bully anymore than I like being called an oversexed mind rapist who probably turns into a hermaphrodite and fucks herself, right?"

"Who ever said that?" Brooks asked, shocked.

"Just some people at the Academy who, I guess, thought I couldn't hear them when I was sitting two tables away." This time, Brooks looked right at Seven and hung his head.

"Yeah, but we'd never say anything like that," Gerron protested.

"God, you're an idiot, Gerron. She's talking about how we've been treating Seven," Jennifer almost yelled as she stood up and threw down the napkin she'd been playing with. She walked past Seven and said, "I'm sorry," as she went, looking horribly embarrassed.

"I know that this sounds rude, but I really didn't know that you had feelings," Brooks added as he, too, stood and left. "I'm sorry." Seven nodded to his retreating form. Gerron shook his head.

"Sorry, Seven. Jessica's right. We're asses. I'm sorry. You can hit me if you want," he added with a grin. Seven shook her head.

"I do not wish to cause you physical harm," she lied.

"You're a better person than I am, then," Gerron said, smiling as he left. Seven turned to Jessica, a mixture of gratitude and embarrassment making her unsure how to react. Jessica nodded.

"I know. You don't know whether to hit me or thank me. I'll let you think about it. Just remember, if someone's picking on you, pick on them right back. Best way to fit in. They'll either think you're a bitch or joking, but at least they won't think you're a machine." Seven blinked at Jessica, who stood and left her alone to her thoughts.

"Come in," Kathryn called, looking up from her console, where she had been studying the data they had retrieved from the Dracco. She smiled as Seven walked in and stood in front of her desk. "Hello, Seven. What is it?"

"I... need to talk, Captain. I needed someone who can discuss Jessica objectively. I thought that perhaps..." Kathryn nodded and returned to sitting, leaning back in her chair. Seven took the seat across from her.

"Are you still uncomfortable with her presence?"

"Yes, but... Actually, I am not certain anymore. I still do not trust her, yet... despite the fact that I do not greet her or interact with her and often think unkindly of her, she continually treats me well and even defended me this afternoon."

"Why would you need to be defended?" Kathryn demanded, getting angry.

"That is irrelevant. Why does she meet my hostility with kindness? I am... confused." Kathryn sighed.

"Join the club. Ever since I met Jessica, she's been infuriatingly cryptic and unerringly kind and generous. At the same time, she's deadly in battle, though she offers mercy right up until the end. Sometimes I think she's like a tame tiger. Other times, like a wild kitten. The only thing I really know is that she can be trusted to keep her word and she lies less than a Vulcan. Or at least, that was how she was when we last met." Seven nodded.

"Thank you, Captain." Seven stood and left without another word, barely hearing the captain's good-bye. She walked into the turbolift and ordered the car to her deck. She considered her feelings, not toward Jessica, but toward B'Elanna and Harry, as the lift descended.
…

"Hi," Harry called as Seven walked in. She looked at him, but didn't really see him. She walked over to sit next to him as he was requesting, but said nothing. "I think we should talk." Seven looked at him, her attention finally grabbed.

"Perhaps we should." Harry swallowed, hating what he was about to say.

"You don't love me." He meant for it to be a question, but it came out as a statement. Seven waited for him to continue. "I have no right to keep you from actively pursuing whoever it is that you love," Harry looked at his hands in his lap.

"I think I do love you, Harry," Harry looked up at Seven, startled. "But not in a romantic way. I care for you, and you have treated me well. You are right, however, that I wish I were in a relationship with... my love interest. I did not want to hurt you."

"I'm not hurt. I kinda knew all along that this wasn't going to last. But it was fun..." Seven leaned over and kissed Harry on the cheek.

"Then are we no longer a couple?"

"Yeah. You're free, Seven." Harry smiled at her and she smiled back, stood and left. Harry watched her go, then buried his face in his hands, rubbing angrily at his skin. 'You will adapt,' he thought, and then laughed bitterly at his own joke.

To be continued…