Today was just another day to add to a long week of bad ones. Three people have already said 'thank god it's Friday' to me. Why don't they understand that Friday's really only apply to them? I could get called at any time, on any day, and be put to work.
Ring! Ring! Ring! See what I mean?
"Cabot." I hear Cregan's alarmed voice on the other end and he's telling me to get down to the 1-6 right away. Olivia shot Madison? Oh my God!
"I'll be right there." I throw the receiver down, gather my things and hurricane out of the office. I love how people don't even look up anymore. I run in and out of this building like disease breaks loose once a day and I'm escaping from it. I am lucky to catch the first cab that passes and I hoped that traffic wouldn't be a problem.
Oh gees, Olivia must have killed Madison for this many people to be swarming around in here. I really hope that's not the case, but I have a feeling it is. I see Cregan first and he jumps when I touch him but gives me a relieved look before guiding me upstairs. The first thing I see is the two detectives. Olivia is sitting on the couch with her head in her hands and Elliot is leaning over her, mumbling anything to comfort her.
'Her union rep is on the way,' Cregan tells me before leaving me there to butt in.
I didn't want to interrupt Elliot so I touched his shoulder softly. He turned to me and I asked what happened down at the store. As Elliot elaborated on what went down, I couldn't help but glance at Olivia, who sat in silence. She had this surprised look on her face like this had all just happened a second ago; when really, two hours had passed. She pressed her hands into her forehead and I wanted nothing more than to hug her right then. I couldn't believe that Madison had shot Susan and then turned the gun on herself. Then along comes Olivia and tries to talk her out of it, and Madison turns the gun on her. Olivia shot the woman in her own self defense. I know that doesn't help Olivia feel justified at all though.
Cregan's calls pull Elliot from our conversation and downstairs to the office. I'm now left alone in awkward silence with Olivia. I step forward cautiously and ask if I can sit. She nods lightly.
'Olivia…' I start but I have no idea what to say. I don't have to continue, however, because she lifts her head to meet my eyes.
'I murdered a woman today.' She says that so simply, as if it were spilled coffee and she could just wipe it up and it would be forgotten. But her eyes are sad and my heart breaks for her.
'You were protecting yourself; you were doing your job.' God, I must've sounded so textbook.
'Yeah,' she says that with sarcasm as she looks away from me. I guess I'm not helping all that much, although I wish I could.
The remainder of the evening is spent taking down statements and going over details. I take notes and listen to the events from a seat at Munch's desk. Elliot is soon whisked away after a phone call from his irritated wife. He asks if Liv is going to be okay tonight and leaves her when she says she'll be fine. He's so good to her; I'm happy someone can get through to her.
People are slowly filing out and I think about how many Friday evenings are spent in the Special Victims Unit. I'm done with my work here and Olivia is almost finished as well. I told her that if she needed anything to call me. I really meant that in a 'be there for you' sort of way. When it comes down to it, I genuinely care about the people around me. I know I seem like a one woman team, but in times of crisis I like to think others could depend on me. I'm sure not many people see it that way though, which I feel is unfortunate.
She offers her thanks and says she's going to head home and that she's tired but she looks wide awake to me. Who could sleep after something like this happens? I know the way I feel after I put someone away that I really felt was innocent. I don't sleep for days after that. But I have to tell myself I did my job. Not that it helps, but everyone knows me; I pretend.
I figure I'll stop by my favorite bar because this week has sunk into me. This day has ripped away at my skin. First there was this morning, with that uncomfortable mishap in the bathroom and now all this. I order a scotch on the rocks and tell myself this will all smooth out soon. I just have to be patient; something I'm horrible at.