andalitebandit-6 – Ah, I'm not saying yes, and I'm not saying no – just because I'm evil. Muahaha. And I've only seen, like, two episodes of South Park ever o.O; I don't remember that one! And attack squirrels are totally love. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory fever xDD

Silver Beast Girl Midnight – Dun dun dunnnn/creepy theme song music Thankies, love .;

(Chapter Four – What the Hell is Going On?)

Dib managed to get through five minutes of convincing himself not to chase after Zim before he took off down the street. He was way too curious about things to just let this go. The second he reached the house, he beat on the door, trying to see through the windows. "Zim, open the door! I know you're in there!"

"You can't come iiiiinnnn!" Dib heard in a high-pitched, sing-song voice, and he knew that crazy robot was near.

"Why?" Dib asked indignantly.

"Cuz Master said so!"

"WHY did Master say so?" Dib asked impatiently, peering in through the window. GIR leapt up, his bright, blue eyes peering through the glass to meet with Dib's.

"I … don't … know!" GIR finally exploded, giggling hysterically and running around in circles. He started making weird faces in the window, and Dib just let his shoulders sag, simply walking over to the door and twisting the knob.

"Welcome home, son!" he heard as he entered, and was smacked in the head by a robo-parent. Dib simply waved them off and he glanced around the room. GIR was still making faces in the window.

"Where's Zim?" Dib asked impatiently, and GIR let out a shriek and fell from the window.

"INTRUDER!" he shouted, his eyes automatically flickering to crimson as he leapt to his feet. A second later, they were turquoise again and GIR was on Dib's head, giggling. "Yep! Still like a puppy!"

"Look!" Dib cried, prying the small, metal blob off of his head and holding it out by it's own head in front of him. "Where. Is. Zim!"

"He throwin' up!" GIR shrugged, pointing towards the bathroom.

"GIR!" Dib heard screamed from the other room.

"You can't see him. He's horny!"

"GIR!"

Zim was out of the bathroom like a flash, chasing a squealing GIR around the living room. Dib leapt back as they almost crashed into him, and had to grin a bit upon seeing Zim full-out tackling the robot. GIR thrashed around wildly in Zim's grasp, but the second he saw an opening, he simply licked down the length of Zim's arm and was released with a disgusted, "OH, GROSS!" GIR just started running in circles around the room again, cackling gleefully and chanting, "Horny!" over and over again in that annoying voice. Zim just slapped his forehead and stumbled out of the room, looking all the more pale as he exited. Dib watched GIR run around for several more seconds before he realized Zim had gone. He trotted after him.

"Er, you mind explaining to me what's going on?"

Zim started at Dib's voice and whirled around, looking outraged upon seeing the beast so close to him. "What! No! Why do you care!" Zim spat indignantly, straightening his wig and balling his hands into fists. "Jeez, I get sick once and you're breathing down my neck with your FILTHY, dirty carbon dioxide!" He slapped Dib away as the male tried to get closer to him.

"Zim, even humans don't just get randomly sick like that!" Dib argued. "I just want to know what's going on!"

"Why should I tell you? So you can record it and make a brand new alien discovery to show off to your disgusting Swollen Eyeball meat children!"

"You … you know about them?"

"Of course I know about them!" Zim retorted angrily, slamming open a door and entering. "It's part of my JOB." This had to be GIR's room – there were plates of taco crumbs and moldy cookies all over the floor, and the walls were completely plastered with random pictures and posters of monkeys, Krazy Taco logos, piggies, and even a few moose. Zim just cringed and snatched a small, steel-looking ring off the ground. "Horrible … robot…"

"Well," Dib worded slowly, watching beadily as Zim pushed past him and started back across the kitchen. "What would you say if I said I wouldn't do any of that?"

Zim scowled at him as he slipped the ring over his head and around his neck. It automatically minimized to a choker size. "I'd say you were lying and to get the hell out of my base."

"Come on, Zim, I'm being serious here! And what the hell is that thing around your neck and why is it blinking?"

"So am I! And it means it's working, you insolent fool! It helps reduce NAUSEA, and you're dodging the subject!" Zim threw his hands up in the air. "GOD, did you really – REALLY – think I was going to tell you anything, you disgusting imbecile?" he snapped, hounding Dib down and jabbing a rather pointed finger into his chest. "I wouldn't let you know what was going on if you were the last person-"

All of a sudden, Zim stopped, his nails digging hard into his abdomen as he let out a sharp gasp of pain. Dib's first reaction was to run over and help, but he stood solid, his eyes darting around nervously. Zim slowly straightened out, one of his hands still clutching his stomach as he looked up. One of his contacts had fallen out, and his wig was wildly askew. "I said, I wouldn't let-" He was cut off again as he completely doubled over, gasping for breath as an acute lightning bolt of discomfort shot up his side. He looked like he was going to be sick again as he blindly swept his wig away and the other contact slipped from his eye. Dib opened and shut his mouth, not knowing whether to run or to help him back up.

But that's when Zim just launched himself at him.

Dib was flung onto the kitchen tiles as Zim pulled hard on his collar, pressing his lips so firmly against Dib's that Dib was sure his were going to burst from the pressure. He thrashed around frantically, beating at Zim's arms to get off before he finally threw the smaller body off of him.

"Jeeesus CHRIST!" Dib cried, jumping back and wiping his mouth millions of times over, as if trying to get a nasty taste out of his mouth. "I think I'm gonna be SIC-whatthefuckwasthat!"

"I – g – no –" Zim spluttered, his hands snaking up to his head and clutching it so tightly that his skull was in danger of imploding. "Get out! Get out now!" Zim started shoving Dib so hard out the door that Dib's glasses were knocked awry in the process. Dib let out an odd squawking noise as he was shoved onto the front lawn. He leapt up and dove for the door handle, but it wouldn't even jiggle when he tried it. He rushed to the windows, but the curtains had already been drawn closed. Dib banged his fist hard against the window and just stormed off, cursing angrily under his breath as he walked.

(The Next Day)

"You actually CAME to skool?"

Zim felt himself bristle uncomfortably as Dib's shadow loomed over his shoulders like a nightmare he couldn't get rid of. He didn't answer as he prodded at the skool's macaroni (at least he thought it was macaroni) with a plastic spork. He flinched as the shadow disappeared, as did the tray. Zim just jabbed at the tabletop, ignoring the absence of the food. "Zim," Dib said in a slightly softer voice. Zim froze as he felt Dib sitting down next to him, his entire body seizing up as if he was suddenly made of ice.

"Get. A. Way. From. Me."

Dib flinched slightly at the sudden harshness of Zim's voice – he sounded like he was going to rip off his arm and beat him with it right there. Dib looked down at his feet and frowned. "Fine," he spat, shoving himself up from the bench and crossing the cafeteria back to his normal table.

"What's the matter? Lovers in a fight?"

"That's not funny, Gaz," Dib responded crossly, brutally stabbing his lunch. "You didn't see him yesterday." He shuddered. "He just JUMPED me out of nowhere!" Dib wrinkled his nose. "That's not normal. I wanna find out what's wrong."

"Why? It's not like you actually like him or anything," Gaz replied slightly crabbily as she furiously pressed buttons on her Game Slave.

"I … I know," Dib answered hesitantly. "But, he just-"

"Just drop it. You have today after skool to finish your project and that's it. Get through that and you're free. Now shut up so I can get past this stupid fucking level."

Dib glanced up at Gaz for several long seconds, eying her as he let his stiff shoulders fall slack. "Whatever," he mumbled, and started stabbing his food again. It was gonna be a long day.