Chapter 2: Sirius Black
He's up in Buckbeak's bedroom, grooming him, running the brush in long, smooth, sweeping strokes from the place where the hair starts - just behind the withers - right down the Hippogriff's back and over the hindquarters, and he's thinking, well, Beaky, it's just going to be you and me again soon, Harry will be going back to Hogwarts tomorrow ... Mad-Eye and Tonks drop in occasionally and Moony stays as often as he can – mostly when he's between jobs, the poor bugger is working undercover as a Muggle now, I wish he'd let me loan him a few Galleons – but Dung is our only regular visitor, and that's because he's nicking the silver!
He laughs, thinking, the mangy old half-blood, I know there are fewer teaspoons every time he leaves this place, as if I care ... and Dung is always good for some gossip. He's not a bad bloke even if he is a bit light-fingered, shit, he's only a petty thief, he's not a Death Eater, he hasn't killed or tortured or raped anyone, not like Snape ...
Snape! He grimaces in disgust and remembers what he'd told Harry, I just can't see Dumbledore letting Snape teach at Hogwarts if he'd ever worked for Voldemort. I was wrong about that, wasn't I? Somehow Snape has wormed his way into Dumbledore's good graces, convinced Dumbledore that he's reformed – but why won't Dumbledore tell us why he trusts the slimy sod? Oh, Snape thinks he's somebody now, he thinks he's Dumbledore's favourite, he's got Dumbledore fooled alright, but Dumbledore wasn't in the Shrieking Shack, he didn't see how Snape behaved that night, he looked completely insane. If Snape hadn't been foaming at the mouth, we would have revived him, he would have seen Wormtail in his human form after we cast the Homorphus Charm, Wormtail would have gone to Azkaban, and none of this would ever have happened. The stupid bastard, this is all his fault, if he wasn't still stewing over something that happened twenty years ago when we were all in sixth year, Voldemort would still be floating around Albania as a disembodied spirit, Moony would still be teaching at Hogwarts, and I wouldn't be cooped up in this hell-hole - and it's been six months, six whole months that I've been stuck in this place!
He remembers what Snape had said – vengeance is very sweet – and he thinks, I can't believe what a malicious, petty-minded jerk Snape is, carrying a schoolboy grudge like that for twenty years, OK it was an idiotic thing to do, I'll admit that, but I wasn't trying to get him killed - like I'd want to get Moony into that kind of trouble – I just wanted to give him a fright, teach him a lesson, teach him not to mess around with the Marauders. And Moony wasn't in on the joke, he was really upset about it, he didn't speak to me for days after he found out what had happened. I can understand Snape being a bit pissed off with me over that incident, but he took it out on Moony, he got Moony kicked out of his job at Hogwarts – and how is Moony ever going to get another decent job, now that Umbridge has got that anti-werewolf legislation passed? What an arsehole Snape is, when it's Moony who's always sticking up for him, saying that if Dumbledore trusts him that should be good enough, and being nice to him, calling him by his first name, telling everyone what a great potion maker he is ... telling everyone that there are only half a dozen wizards in Europe who are up to making the Wolfsbane Potion!
And now he feels aggrieved, what's going on with Moony – has he forgotten that he's a Marauder? Moony has even hinted a couple of times that maybe part of the reason Snape went over to Voldemort was that business in the Shrieking Shack in sixth year, and that is absolute crap because Snape was a foul little Dark wizard in training from the day that he started at Hogwarts - has Moony forgotten that bone-breaking curse he used on me in the very first week of term, I was in the Hospital Wing for two days. That was a serious curse that Snape used, half the seventh years wouldn't have even heard of it, and he only got a week's worth of detentions!
And then he thinks, it wasn't as if I got off scot free after Moony gave Snape his little scare in the Shrieking Shack - Dumbledore lectured me for hours and it would have been expulsion except that he had to keep it quiet for Moony's sake. And why wasn't Snape in trouble too – he was breaking curfew and out of bounds – and he was asking for it, anyway, always sneaking around, sticking his big nose in where it wasn't wanted. What did Moony tell me the Map said to Snape when he got his dirty paws on it? "Mr Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business." Ha! And didn't we have fun with that Map until Filch confiscated it, Snape couldn't get away from us, not that we would have bothered with him if he'd learnt his lesson and kept his head down, but he kept fighting back, he kept trying to hex us, the idiot, and he couldn't keep his mouth shut, either, he was always sniping and sneering – oh, he was asking for it, alright!
And Snape was always such a sly, nasty little Slytherin creep, always hanging around the Restricted Section in the Library, dragging a dozen Dark Arts books around with him wherever he went ... Ugly, greasy, scruffy little nobody, and what kind of a name is Snape, anyway? Snape's father must have been a foreigner, he must have been from one of those families that came over from the Continent during the Grindelwald war - like Dolohov and Karkaroff's families - from some place where pureblood snobbery is even worse than it is in England, didn't Minerva say the other day that Durmstrang still won't admit Muggle-borns?
And Snape does look a bit foreign, with that hooked nose and oily hair, and by Merlin he's always been an ugly bastard, always had an ugly look on his face, always sneering and smirking and scowling - just looking at him when he was a kid made me want to curse him! And he was such a girl if you got his wand away from him, he cried like a girl that day in third year when James punched him and broke his nose, Snape snivelled like a girl that day, that's how he got the nick-name "Snivellus".
OK, OK, maybe we pranked Snape a bit when we were at Hogwarts, especially in fifth year, that was probably the worst - we were arrogant young berks, well, not Moony so much, but hell, we were only fifteen! But we laid off him in seventh year, James was always with Lily in seventh year and it wasn't nearly as much fun without James. And James didn't want to upset Lily, she was doing extra NEWT credit work in Potions with Snape and she kept saying he wasn't that bad. That was the thing about Lily, she had to believe the best of people, even of Snape – but she was wrong about him, because he turned out to be a Death Eater. Yep, even if we were a bit out of order when we were at school, Snape can't point the finger - he's a filthy Death Eater! Mad-Eye's told me a bit about his Ministry file, there's some really nasty stuff in that file, and Mad-Eye doesn't trust him, either ... and it was Mad-Eye who arrested him. Oh, the Ministry went easy on Snape - he didn't spend a day in Azkaban, and he wasn't even publicly tried, he just had an informal hearing in front of Barty Crouch, senior. The same man who sent me to Azkaban without a trial went easy on Snape – Mad-Eye told me, he was there.
Then he thinks, I'm glad it wasn't Mad-Eye who arrested me, I'm glad it was Scrimgeour – he wasn't a member of the Order. It would have been hard being interrogated by Mad-Eye - not that he was called Mad-Eye in those days, he still had both his eyes, he lost that eye when Bellatrix and her little gang were arrested and charged with the torture of the Longbottoms - it would have been hard being interrogated by someone I knew and liked, someone I'd seen at a dozen Order meetings.
And then he remembers the photograph of the original Order members that Mad-Eye has shown him, and the names that go with the missing faces – Marlene McKinnon, Frank and Alice Longbottom, Benjy Fenwick, Edgar Bones, Caradoc Dearborn, Gideon and Fabian Prewett, Dorcas Meadowes, James and Lily Potter ... and Peter Pettigrew. He realises that Buckbeak is gently nibbling at his shoulder, he's dropped the brush on the floor ... sorry, Beaky, he mutters as he retrieves the brush and starts grooming again.
Damn, damn, damn, he thinks, Snape is right, I can't do anything useful for the Order while the Ministry has a ten thousand Galleon reward on my head, but if he says another word about it, if he hints one more time that I'm a coward, I'll let him have it, I don't care what Dumbledore says, I'll really let Snape have it. Oh, I won't kill him, but I'll knock him around a bit, remind him of who he's dealing with.
He finishes grooming the Hippogriff, ruffles his neck feathers, and promises to fetch him a little treat from the kitchen - he's put a couple of Dung's special magically improved Muggle rat traps in the pantry and something has usually blundered into one of them by this time of the day - but as he's coming down the stairs he hears the front doorbell ring, and he thinks ... Arthur! Molly said last night that she hoped that Arthur would be getting out of St Mungo's today, I'll let her answer the door and I'll wait in the kitchen, they'd probably like to have a little private time together, Molly went through a hell of a time until they found something to stop the bleeding ... I'll miss Molly, even if she does give me the evil eye whenever I pour myself a glass of firewhisky or make a joke about Snape.
He drops into a chair in the kitchen, but when Molly walks through the door she doesn't have Arthur with her, it's someone he's much less pleased to see – Snape! Why is the bastard here when there's no meeting of the Order scheduled? Snape wants to see Harry, Merlin's beard, what can be so important that it can't wait until Harry is back at Hogwarts? Molly trots off to fetch Harry, and the moment she's out the door he turns on Snape and demands to know what's going on, and lets him know, forcefully, that anything Snape has to say to Harry, he can say in the presence of his godfather.
Snape shrugs, and tosses him a letter. He rips it open, it's from Dumbledore, just a brief note advising him that Dumbledore is concerned that Voldemort may be accessing Harry's mind – it will be that damned curse scar troubling him again – but Harry is not to be told anything of this, and he will be receiving tutoring in Occlumency.
He hears the kitchen door open, hears Harry say, "Er ..." to signal his presence.
Snape looks around at Harry, orders him to sit down.
He thinks, Snape must love being a teacher, he must love being able to bully a bunch of kids ... he was such a loser when he was at school, and now he's back at Hogwarts, on the staff, handing out detentions and taking points – he must love that! Bloody hell, I've spent twelve years in Azkaban, two years on the run, and six months under house arrest, and all that time Snape has had a comfortable job at Hogwarts, he's been having a nice comfortable time playing the part of Dumbledore's pet Death Eater ... well, he's not pushing Harry around in my house.
He leans back on the rear legs of his chair and speaks to the ceiling to emphasise his contempt. "You know," he says loudly, "I think I'd prefer it if you didn't give orders here, Snape. It's my house, you see."
He's scored a hit, Snape's face flushes, turns the same ugly brick colour he remembers from their schooldays.
Harry sits down next to him, facing Snape across the table, that's sending the greasy git the right message – tangle with one Marauder, and you tangle with all of them.
Snape sneers, "I was supposed to see you alone, Potter, but Black - ."
He interrupts. "I'm his godfather," he says, louder than ever, and he's thinking, I was James and Lily's closest friend, I was James' best man at their wedding – Moony is a great bloke but he does have his furry little problem, of course they chose me to be Harry's godfather. And if Wormtail hadn't framed me, I would have been the one to bring him up, he would have gone to those damned Muggles over my dead body!
"I am here on Dumbledore's orders," says Snape, in that nasty, snide voice he uses when he's being insulting, "but by all means stay, Black, I know you like to feel ... involved."
Same old Snape, sniping and needling, and dropping Dumbledore's name into it, gloating over how Dumbledore trusts him, relies on him, needs him ...
"What's that supposed to mean?" he says, letting his chair fall back on to all four legs with a loud bang.
"Merely that I am sure that you must feel – ah – frustrated by the fact that you can do nothing useful for the Order."
Even though he's been expecting it, expecting Snape to taunt him because he's stuck in this ghastly house, even though he's expecting Snape to rub it in – Dumbledore's orders to him are to lie low, stay out of sight, to do nothing – it still hurts, and his face turns red with rage and embarrassment.
Snape is sneering with satisfaction as he turns to Harry, tells him, "The Headmaster has sent me to tell you, Potter, that it is his wish for you to study Occlumency this term."
"Study what?" asks Harry.
Snape's sneer becomes more pronounced as he explains what Occlumency is, and that's bloody unfair, Occlumency is NEWT level stuff, really advanced magic, and most adult wizards would struggle with it ... of course Harry hasn't heard of Occlumency!
Harry looks stunned, and blurts out, "Why do I have to study Occlu – thing?"
He'd like to tell Harry, he'd like to tell him everything – why is Dumbledore mollycoddling Harry like this? For Merlin's sake, look at what he's done! Dealt with Quirrell, killed a Basilisk, driven off a hundred Dementors, won the Tri-wizard Tournament, duelled with Voldemort himself ... why doesn't Dumbledore just tell Harry what's going on?
But he knows better than to say anything, Dumbledore has made it very, very clear that Harry is to know nothing of what's hidden in the Department of Mysteries, and he remembers how angry Dumbledore was when Dung left his post in Privet Drive, there had been no benign smile on his face, no twinkle in the blue eyes then.
Snape answers smoothly, "Because the Headmaster thinks it is a good idea. You will receive private lessons once a week, but you will not tell anybody what you are doing, least of all Dolores Umbridge. You understand?"
"Yes," says Harry. "Who's going to be teaching me?"
Snape raises an eyebrow and replies, "I am."
Harry looks horrified, and then Harry looks round at him for support, and he thinks – I'm here for you, kid, I'll always be here for you - and he jumps in at once. "Why can't Dumbledore teach Harry?" he asks aggressively, thinking, I know Dumbledore is a busy man – but what could be more important than this? "Why you?"
Snape says, "I suppose because it is a headmaster's privilege to delegate less enjoyable tasks. I assure you, I did not beg for the job." He gets to his feet and adds, "I will expect you at six o'clock on Monday evening, Potter. My office. If anyone asks, you are taking remedial Potions. Nobody who has seen you in my classes could deny you need them."
He's furious at the calculated nastiness of this reply, Harry hasn't said anything but he's gathered from a few remarks that the Weasley boys have made that Harry isn't Snape's favourite student, and Moony, well, Moony has been a bit evasive when he's asked how Snape treats Harry - and if this is how Snape speaks to Harry in his godfather's presence, what might he get up to when it's just the two of them, when there are no witnesses?
Snape turns to leave, but he's not going to let Snape get away with this kind of behaviour.
"Wait a moment," he says, sitting up straighter in his chair.
Snape turns back to face them, the sneer still plastered to his face. "I am in rather a hurry, Black," Snape says. "Unlike you, I do not have unlimited leisure time."
He thinks, you can't leave it alone, can you Snape? Another dig like that and I'll hang you upside down, like we did at school – and I hope you've washed your underpants lately ...
"I'll get to the point," he says, standing up. There's no point in being subtle, Snape is the kind of bully who only responds to direct threats from somebody who's bigger and stronger than he is. He notes with satisfaction that he's still taller than Snape, and Snape is already looking defensive, balling his fist in the pocket of his cloak over the handle of his wand – and he thinks, worried about getting your nose broken again, are you, Snivelly? Well, I won't lay a hand on you, I wouldn't want to get grease on it, I wouldn't want to have to wash it.
He says, "If I hear you're using these Occlumency lessons to give Harry a hard time, you'll have me to answer to."
Snape is sneering again, "How touching, but surely you've noticed that Potter is very like his father?"
"Yes, I have," he says proudly, thinking, Harry is the spitting image of James, he looks like him, he talks like him, he plays Quidditch like him, I know, I've seen him play ... but what's that got to do with it?
"Well then, you'll know he's so arrogant that criticism simply bounces off him," Snape replies sleekly.
He thinks – right! You've done it now, Snape, bringing James into this! James and I were the best in the school at whatever we did, we were the height of cool – we were everything you wanted to be, you miserable, jealous little prick! How dare you bring James into this!
He pushes his chair roughly aside, and strides around the table towards Snape, pulling out his wand. And suddenly he's really angry and it's not about Harry any more, it's about James and Lily, it's about all those faces missing from the Order photograph, it's about Voldemort and his filthy, stinking Death Eaters. And he's been spoiling for this fight for six months, he'd been too shocked and horrified by the news of Voldemort's return the night that Dumbledore forced him to shake hands with Snape to fully realise the implications of the Dark Mark on Snape's arm ... but Snape is a Death Eater, he's one of Voldemort's creatures, and he's never had to suffer for it, he's been cunning and clever enough to stay out of trouble – so far. Well, maybe his luck is about to run out ...
Snape looks calculating, those black eyes are darting from his wand-tip to his face, Snape's a Legilimens so there's no advantage in a non-verbal spell, not that this bothers him, Snape didn't put up much of a show in the Shrieking Shack, did he? He let three kids disarm him!
"I've warned you, Snivellus," he says, his face barely a foot from Snape's. "I don't care if Dumbledore thinks you've reformed, I know better - ."
"Oh, but why don't you tell him so?" Snape whispers. "Or are you afraid that he might not take very seriously the advice of a man who has been hiding inside his mother's house for six months?"
He thinks, out with it, Snape, stop hinting, come on - if you're going to call me a coward, just come out and say it! But before he hurts Snape with his wand, he'll hurt him with words, the insult that always stung him in the old days, probably it's not true - Snape somehow managed to get with a few girls in his last year at Hogwarts, must have used the Imperius Curse on them – but it doesn't matter whether or not it's true, provided that it hurts. He remembers that Harry is still in the room, so he doesn't use the word he'd like to, but Snape will know what he means ...
"Tell me, how is Lucius Malfoy these days? I expect he's delighted his lapdog's working at Hogwarts, isn't he?"
"Speaking of dogs," Snape says softly, "Did you know that Lucius Malfoy recognised you last time you risked a little jaunt outside? Clever idea, Black, getting yourself seen on a safe station platform ... gave you a cast-iron excuse not to leave your hidey-hole in future, didn't it?"
He raises his wand, he's going to take Snape apart, so comprehensively that not even St Mungo's will be able to put the bastard back together again ... but Harry is yelling, "NO!" Harry is vaulting over the table and trying to get between him and Snape, shouting, "Sirius, don't!"
"Are you calling me a coward?" he roars, trying to push Harry out of the way.
"Why, yes, I suppose I am," says Snape.
"Harry – get – out – of – it!" he snarls, pushing Harry aside with his free hand. He's going to kill Snape, Harry stopped him killing Pettigrew and look at what came of that, but he's going to kill Snape, he's going to kill at least one of Voldemort's Death Eaters before they kill him, but first he's going to crucio the filthy bastard, make him scream and twitch, give him a taste of his own medicine ...
Then the kitchen door opens and the entire Weasley family plus Hermione Granger walk in, Arthur Weasley amongst them, wearing striped pyjamas under a mackintosh, and Arthur announces brightly to the whole kitchen, "Cured! Completely cured!"
Startled, he turns to look at the Weasleys, it's as if someone has thrown a bucket of cold water over him. Sweet Merlin, what had he been about to do? Use an Unforgiveable in front of Harry? Use the Cruciatus Curse – after what happened to Harry in that graveyard?
"Merlin's beard," says Arthur, the smile sliding off his face, and he doesn't look like a mild mannered Ministry clerk any more, he looks like the kind of guy you don't want to tangle with. "What's going on here?"
Snape also seems to have come to his senses, he's lowered his wand, now he pockets it, turns on his heel and sweeps across the room.
At the door he looks back. "Six o'clock, Monday evening, Potter." And then he's gone.
He glares after Snape, his wand at his side. He's feeling dirty and ashamed, almost as if he's somehow played into Snape's hands. What the hell had he been thinking of? What would Dumbledore have done if he'd used an Unforgiveable in a kitchen scuffle with Snape? And what would Harry have thought of him? Sure, in the first war against Voldemort the Aurors were authorised to use the Unforgiveables – but only as a last resort, and Dumbledore never liked it.
"What's going on?" asks Arthur again.
"Nothing, Arthur," he says, breathing heavily as though he had run a long distance. "Just a friendly little chat between two old school friends."
He just wants to forget about the whole horrible incident as quickly as possible, he knows he's going to stew about it for hours, but he definitely doesn't want any more questions. He's got to steer the conversation back onto safe ground – and Molly is looking at him over Arthur's shoulder, looking anxious and frightened.
He makes an effort to smile at Arthur. "So ... you're cured? That's great news, really great."
Molly looks relieved, and she's quick to reply on Arthur's behalf.
"Yes, isn't it?" she says, leading Arthur into the kitchen and settling him on a chair. "Healer Smethwyck worked his magic in the end, found an antidote to whatever that snake's got in its fangs, and Arthur's learned his lesson about dabbling in Muggle medicine, haven't you dear?"