XXI. The Giant Bird of DOOM!

Boba could sense it--he was very close. Very close indeed...

He stepped over Bill's squirming form and parted the branches in front of him carefully. A large clearing was straight ahead. Ambush? Didn't matter; Boba Fett could handle anything that Kashyyyk threw at him. Even that damn Klyyynaii bird...

Boba moved lightly into the clearing, Bill stumbling in after him. His prey was close. He could almost smell it...

"Ugh! What's that awful smell?"

"The perfect victim of my hunt," Boba breathed in reverie.

"Smells like bird poop."

>SILENCE!>

"Woah! What was that?" Bill cowered towards his master. "It was like it was...in my head!"

>I said silence! But does anyone listen? No, of course not! It's just blah blah blah, I'm stupid, blah blah, eat me.>

"Show yourself!" Boba yelled, glancing around the clearing.

>Oh, fine. If you insist.> There was a rustling of trees and from the forest came a giant...

"KLYYYNAII?"

>Oh, you know one of my brothers? A cousin perhaps? Aunt?>

"But...but you're enormous!" The bird stuck its beak in the air, about five meters above the ground.

>Big-boned, thankyouverymuch.>

"And your eyes! They don't burn!"

>Yes, I was lucky enough not to inherit that devastating disease. All my relatives are half blind, you know.>

"Yes, um, of course." Boba was contemplating, in awe, the precarious situation he now found himself in, and did not notice that Bill-of-the-short-attention-span had wandered a little toward the great bird. He was studying, very intently, the area beneath the Klyyynaii's claws.

"Boba!" he shrieked, ecstatic. "Look at what he's standing on!" The bounty hunter lifted his head, very slowly, and saw the most beautiful things his eyes had ever beheld--a patch of chooclaat-covered strawpberries.

"Bill." he said, voice wavering in oppressed excitement. "I want to have your babies."

"GROSS!" But Fett did not hear the Twi'lek's protests, for he was throwing himself at the feet of the Klyyynaii and kissing the precious fruits.

>Just what do you think you are doing with MY strawpberries?> the Klyyynaii squawked, grabbing the bounty hunter with his claws.

"I apologize, your graciousnessness. But you see, if I don't have a kilogram of chooclaat-covered strawpberries by the end of the month, I'll be killed! And The Process isn't going so well."

>What do I care of your misfortunes?>

"Um...would you care if it's for money?"

>No.>

"Maintaining my legend?" The bird said nothing. "Well, what about love?"

The bird regarded him seriously. >Now, are you sure you want to do that? I hear Twi'leks don't make very good parents.>

"What? NO! Gods, no! I was kidding."

"Hey!" Bill protested, hearing that they would were talking about him. The bird and Boba told him to shut up in unison.

"Klyyynaii, my love is a beautiful woman, with eyes like grenade explosions and a voice like a homing missile...that's good, of course."

>Er, yes, of course. You seem to be very much in love, so I will help you in your quest. I shall even provide transportation-->

"My ship--"

>I WILL PROVIDE TRANSPORTATION!> it squawked. >As long as you promise to always care for and love my little relatives. So many people hate them, and I just don't know why...>

"Heh, of course!" Boba lied through his clenched teeth.

"But didn't you say that you blasted--"

"BILLDOYOUWANTTOLIVETOSEEMILLAGAIN!"

"OHGODSIDIDN'TSAYANYTHING!"

"Good. So, you'll help us?"

>Yes. Just say where we need to go.>

"Well, we might need to make a few detours..."

Only one chapter left! Sorry about the Klyyynaii speech, but for some reason fanfiction dot net allows "greater than" signs but not "less than" signs. An optimistic outlook, perhaps?