One Mixed Up Mary-Sue

Chapter 20

-

Emily hung her head over the side of the small boat, splashing cool water over her face, trying to ease her seasickness. She shuddered and tried to keep the contents of her stomach down as she was hit by another wave of nausea. Once it had passed, she wiped her face again.

"Everything will be okay," Legoals said, laying a hand gently on her back.

"God damn it!" she shouted. She grabbed his arm and pushed him away from her. "Stop freaking touching me."

He opened his mouth to protest, but Emily had had enough. "Be quiet," she said, shoving him as hard as she could out of the boat. With a grin on her face, Emily leaned back and watched as he climber back into the boat.

"That wasn't nice..." he said, pouting. Sitting immediately to Emily's right, Aragorn was pointing and laughing quite loudly.

"But it was funny," Emily said, digging through her bag. She pulled out the pink care package to give it an inspection. It actually seemed pretty sweet, there was some fruit, bread, cookies, a sweater and some extra socks.

Why don't you eat the cookies? Your grandma made them especially for you!

'No thanks. Besides, I'm sick.'

Oh, right. Well, get well soon and all.

'You know, I would be fine if I wasn't in this boat. I would be super healthy if you sent me home.'

No.

'Please?'

Not until you fall in love with Legolas.

'I hate you.'

I know. But when this is all over, you'll thank me.

Emily rolled her eyes, but as her stomach lurched, she went to staring at the floor of the boat, and hoping that her nausea would calm down soon.

-

Now that her stomach had gotten used to the boat's movements, Emily was finding herself quite bored. None of her boat-mates were very good conversationalists, and the repetitive scenery was getting pretty old pretty fast. She pulled out one of the cookies that she had received in her care package, broke a small piece off, and threw it at the back of Legolas' head. She grinned.

The boredom quickly disappeared.

This game went on in a similar manner for a little while. Emily found that she was thoroughly enjoying herself. Unfortunately, her fun was interrupted by a laugh coming from behind her.

"Holy shit!" she shouted, turning around. If she hadn't been in an enchanted boat, she was sure it would have capsized with her sudden movement. Once she'd turned around, she stared with slight puzzlement. Gimli sat there, laughing and Legoals' cookie-filled hair.

Yeah, I kind of forgot about him back when we were leaving that cave place… I just remembered now.

"Hi, Gimli," she said, managing a small wave.

Is he too gross? I can make him go away.

'No.'

"Is he alive?" Gimli asked, nodding towards Legolas, who had not even turned around when he'd appeared.

"It would appear so," Emily said, flicking another piece of cookie at Legolas. "I mean, he's breathing and everything. But on the inside, I'm sure he's dead. Here, take a cookie, it's fun." She handed him a cookie, which he accepted with a "thank you", and took a bite out of.

"That's tasty," he said.

"You can't eat it!" Emily shouted. "They're only for throwing at Legolas."

"Right," he said, breaking off a piece of cookie.

The boat shook and Emily heard a scraping noise. They had hit the riverbank. Not thinking out her next action, Emily climbed out of the boat and started running.

Where are you going?

'Away!'

Stop it! Come back!

She kept running until she felt like her lungs would burst in her chest, and she was doubled over, trying to pull in air. By that time, she had put a considerable amount of distance between herself and the others. Once she had mostly regained a normal breathing pattern, she sat down in front of a tree and leaned her head backwards, resting against the tree's trunk. She wasn't sure how long she had been sitting there when she finally looked up.

"Just let me go home," Emily said out loud. She stopped and took a slow breath. "Good lord, why the hell am I here? Look at me; I'm not the girl that you want. I'm not perfect and I can't even last a few days in this world! Just let me go home, there are a thousand better girls for this than me." She stood and after making a not-so-good guess, headed off in the direction that she thought she had come from.

After walking in a few pointless circles, she eventually heard voices arguing. Recognizing them, she walked towards the loud argument. She walked back in silence. She didn't want them to notice her or say anything. She didn't want to talk to anyone. Yes, she realized that she was acting like a three-year-old, but Emily also figured that being dragged here gave her rights to do that.

"You're back!" Legolas yelled, jumping up and hugging her once she'd come into view.

"Get the hell off of me," she said, pushing him away from her.

"Leave her alone," Aragorn said, pushing Legolas further away from her. "Emily, I'm so happy that you're okay."

"Go away," she said, sitting down on the ground.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," Emily said nonchalantly. Her expression quickly became one of annoyance. "Except that you won't leave me alone."

"You seem upset lately," Legolas said. "Is there anything you want to talk about?"

"No thank you, Dr. Phil." She replied, rolling her eyes. "You know this is getting really sad. I'm sick of having to avoid you. But you don't seem to want to take a hint."

"Don't be silly, Emily! I love you!"

Man, this is getting boring. I'm fast-forwarding to later.

'Why?'

I already told you; I'm bored.

Emily shut her eyes as a bright white light flashed.

When she opened them again, all chaos had broken loose. Uruk-hais were swarming. Legolas and Aragon had drawn swords and were ready to attack. The hobbits were running in circles, screaming. Emily backed up a few steps until she hit a tree.

"Emily!" Aragorn called out to her. "We will defend you!"

"Right," she said, but decided that she didn't trust the capabilities of those two. She grabbed a low-hanging branch of the tree and pulled herself up, and continued climbing until she was about twenty feet above the ground, a height that she considered at least somewhat safe. After taking a slow breath, she settled into her spot and prepared to watch the scrape below.

Emily, you can go down now.

'You're sure? You're not lying to me because you hate me?'

No, I need you alive so that you can fall in love, remember?

'Okay.'

With a tight grip on the branch that she was sitting on, Emily slowly lowered her feet to the branch below. Climbing down a tree was considerably trickier than climbing up a tree. She had almost reached the ground when a bird flew off a branch that she had shaken and almost went straight into her face. Swearing, Emily lost her grip and fell. Somewhere out there, Mary-Sue was watching happily; Legolas had been right there to catch her as she fell.

'You did this on purpose!'

Why yes, yes I did.

"Emily! I have saved you," Legolas declared, still holding her in his arms. "Will you now love me?"

"No," Emily snapped. "Now put me down." When he did so, Emily took a moment to dust herself off. That didn't last too long, though as she noticed a large group of Uruk-Hai running towards them. She took a few steps backwards, but tripped over something.

"What the hell?" After clumsily getting to her feet, she looked at the spot where she'd fallen. The hobbits were all sitting together, sobbing rather loudly.

"Get up," she said, dragging them to their feet. "Get going, now."

It was needless to say, they didn't get going anywhere. They all grabbed her and started crying louder.

"Gah! Get off of me!" Emily tried to push them away, but it was no use. "Okay, you and you have to go, you should be gone. And you two, uh, go find Boromir, I think he has candy."

"Candy!" Merry and Pippin both ran as quickly as they could, singing a song about liquorice and lollypops.

"Will you come with us, Emily?" Frodo asked, pouting.

"No!" Emily said. "You two need to go alone."

"Whoever kills the most gets to ask Emily on a date!" Aragorn said.

"Okay, let's go!" She said, grabbing each of them by the hand and running. She could just start to see (and hear) the Anduin when to she saw that Merry and Pippin had found Boromir. As he fought, the hobbits were sitting against a rock crying.

"Shit," Emily said as she tripped on a root and fell on her face. Frodo and Sam screamed. She started to stand up, and Frodo and Sam screamed louder. Then she saw the feet beside her.

With total confidence in being a Mary-Sue, she grabbed her sword and swung aimlessly. Thanks to Mary-Sue magic, she hit the Uruk-Hai before it got the chance to kill her in a most painful manner. Sadly, she'd forgotten about the sword's little tendency to start attacking things on its own.

"Holy crap," she said as it dragged her around the small clearing, taking out Uruk-Hai. She just clung to the thing for dear life. Boromir quickly looked over at her, but then turned back to the ever-increasing number of Uruk-Hai

After a moment Emily felt like she was going to throw up. The sword was covered with black blood, and she sported a good amount of it on herself. She turned, the sword swinging itself again, and she stopped dead in her tracks, dropping the sword.

"Shit," she said under her breath. Boromir had just been hit by an arrow. Yes, canonically, he was supposed to die, but it's a bit different when it's going on just a few feet away from where you're standing. She looked around frantically for where the archer was. Panicking, she grabbed the sword, and it automatically started swinging itself again.

Another arrow flew and this time she could see where it was coming from. She saw it. Acting on the little survival instinct that she had, she put away her sword and she grabbed her bow and notched an arrow.

But she was too slow, too clumsy. She felt the cold arrowhead burry itself deep into her side. Stunned by the pain, she fell to her knees and then tipped over forward, hitting her head hard on a rock.