Harry tossed and turned painfully in his sleep. His thoughts and dreams on the one person who was able to cause him more harm than the Dursleys ever could.
A little boy was sleeping peacefully in his bed; there was no sound but the footsteps on the stairs coming down to his room. Suddenly there was a large explosion and the door to the young boys room burst open causing the young child to shout out in surprise. After a moment of waiting while the boy's eyes adjusted to the darkness, he paled. His eyes were resting on the hooded figure standing in the shadows of the doorway. In the darkness the boy could only see one thing of this man, his face. It was Voldermort.
"MOTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The boy screamed, in hopes that his mother would come save him. Voldermort just laughed his high cold laugh that sent shivers down Harry's spin even in his sleep.
"Stupid boy, your parents are already dead" Voldermort smirked at him, "as you will be in a moment." Colin burst into tears, gripping his sheets so hard his knuckles were turning white. "Please no sir, please don't kill me".
Although unconscious, Harry still gasped audibly when he saw the face of the boy in his dream, heard the desperate note his voice had taken. Why Colin?
"Alright, I will make a deal with you, if you want to live, you will answer one question for me. Tell me, where Dumbledore is keeping Harry Potter this summer?"
"I, I don't know" Colin stammered.
"Stupid boy!" A jet of green light shot out of Voldermort's wand and Colin slumped unceremoniously onto his bed.
Harry woke up a moment later when he started to cough. He sat up quickly and tried to remove the fluid from his lungs. He looked down at his hands; they were covered in blood, in his blood. His eyes widened in shock. How, where, what, blood? His mind was racing trying to figure what had happened. He felt slowly around his face for a moment till his fingers pressed softly on his scar, he let out a sharp yelp of pain, and surely enough, when he pulled his fingers back from his forehead they were drenched in blood.
Harry sighed as he got up. It was barely 3:50 am, and yet he was up and running, and due to the dream that he had just had, he doubted whether he would be able to go back to sleep. Harry grabbed one of his old shirts, the ones that had so many holes that he couldn't wear it without it falling off, and tied it tightly around his scar. He was about to go and mull over his dream (he knew it was a vision, but he didn't want to admit it) when the door to the closet suddenly burst open.
"Damn boy! What do you think you are doing screaming like that? Trying to wake the whole neighborhood?" Harry was thrown out of the closet and to he ground with a single swat at his back. Vernon kicked him savagely in the ribs. Harry winced in pain but did not cry out, he never did anymore, it seemed that the knowledge that Harry was in pain would fuel Vernon on, causing Harry a much harsher degree of damage than if he remained silent.
The beating lasted for only a few minutes this time. Harry was happy that Vernon was so tired, not only did he not beat Harry as hard, but his insults weren't quite as hurtful and creative as usual, just the normal, "Your parents died because of you!" "You are a worthless freak of a human being!" "I'll teach you for being such a disgrace." The last of which was usually the conclusive one, followed normally by a very sharp kick to the head and Vernon departing.
Harry dragged himself back over to his bed (a shirt that was larger than the rest), noticing briefly that his glasses, that were already broken, had one lens that had completely shattered. He picked up all the pieces if glass and held them in his palm for a moment, catching his breath. Harry let one tear slide along his cheek, knowing that it would be the last one to ever do so again. Harry Potter would cry no more, it was hard to cry without feelings.
He heard a
slight movement outside of his door, and his palms tightened in fear. He sat perfectly still for a moment, not
daring to breath. He slowly relaxed;
still ready to take action if the need arise.
It was then that he noticed the blood dripping from his hand.
"Holy shit!" He murmured. There was so much blood dripping from his hand that he doubted he would continue to live it kept flowing. 'That might not be such a bad idea" he though cynically to himself. But really, after he had been responsible for so many deaths – Cedric, his parents, Colin and his parents – was it really worth it to keep on living? He would just cause more deaths. Plus, he really was a great burden on the Dursleys. They didn't ask for him, nobody did. He was a curse that ruined everyone's lives. Maybe it would be better if he just finished himself off.
He slowly opened his hand and was amused to see three of the broken pieces from his glasses embedded into his hand. He smiled slightly as a thought came to his head. He reached down and pulled out the largest piece, ignoring the two other, slightly smaller shards and turned his hand over, exposing his white, unmarred wrist.
He dragged the ragged edge slightly over his wrist, enjoying the slight splitting sensation as a thin line of blood appeared, straight as ruler. He began to drag it in a swirling motion creating flowing patterns of thin red lines. He had continued on in this fashion for nearly five minutes when he stopped to look at his "artwork." Both the patterns and the pain had a strangely calming effect on him, and before he knew what was happening, he was drifting off into a not-so-dreamless sleep.
***
"Pickled gumdrops" Severus muttered into the gargoyle wishing, not for the first time, that the headmaster could be a little less strange. The statue moved aside allowing him entry and he took the moving, circular stairs two at a time, not an easy task I assure you, but today Severus was too happy to do anything less. Do you know how long he had been waiting for something like this to happen? Very long, that's how long. The door to the Headmaster's office opened of its own accord and Severus bolted inside, using his wand to close the door after him.
"Hello Severus!" Dumbledore smiled warmly and looked behind Snape clearly expecting Harry to walk in after him. A look of surprise and confusion crossed Albus's face when he saw nothing but the closed door behind Snape, and if anything could have improved Severus's mood, it was this. It was not every day that a normal wizard like him surprised the headmaster, and he was going to make the most of it.
"Something wrong Albus?" Albus looked to him, then door, then back again. He did this quite a few times before he answered with a simple, palpable question.
"Where's Harry?" Snape smiled slightly and he felt it contort his face into a strange position that seemed (and looked) very unnatural, he stopped quickly.
"Oh yes! The boy, I had completely forgotten!" 'Not' Snape added to himself, "Potter has decided not to return to Hogwarts." He said matter-of-factly. Severus would have paid money to see the look that was on Dumbledore's face, and that fact that he had caused it was almost too much to bear. It was a look a sheer astonishment, with a hint of depression and despair mixed in. Albus sighed.
"Do you have any idea what caused him to make this sudden decision Severus?" 'Oh well that's no fun' Severus sighed to himself, 'he can't even humor me by staying surprised, oh well, it was fun while it lasted.'
"Actually sir, I have no idea. He sounded pretty desperate though, so I was kind enough to let him stay." Albus stared off into space for a few moments, contemplating the workings of the young child's mind. He returned his attention back to Severus.
"I had really hoped that this would not happen." Dumbledore's shoulders sagged, giving the usually vivacious man a very old and tired appearance. "I fear that the reason he does not want to return is because of the third task and Cedric's death." Severus paled visibly (a/n - yes I know that is hard for Severus to pale further, but still . . .) he hadn't even thought about that. He had of course, being on the staff, known what had happened when Potter was transported into the graveyard, but he had completely forgotten about the Potter element in the resurrection of Voldermort. If Dumbledore knew what Severus was thinking about he tastefully ignored it and continued. "I think it would be best if we give Harry some time to recover. Maybe after a couple of months he will feel more like returning." Severus nodded. "We will of course" Albus added, "Keep the protection up around Privet Drive, number four in particular." Severus nodded again. "We wouldn't want him to get taken by Voldermort now would we?"
Severus smiled politely at the headmasters attempt to lighten the mood, but he, in general, did not feel much better. In fact, he kind of felt like killing something, a young Gryffindor something, but then again, Potter usually had that effect on him. "Yes, I think it would be better if we just let him alone for a bit, he wouldn't enjoy it if we kept popping in every once and a while, yes, no contact for a bit, that should be just the trick." The headmaster was talking more to himself now than to Severus, but in a few moments he looked up, muttered, "Thank you Severus" and went back to the document, the blank document he had been reading before Severus had arrived. Snape shook his head as walked out of the Headmaster's office. This was going to be a very promising couple of months.