Chapter Six – Alone

It was late; past midnight as she sat discreetly on the couch waiting. She had been sitting in the dark for almost the entire night ever since the bar had closed for the day. The doubt was eating at her, and he hadn't returned her call yet. Not only was that bad, but he wasn't home at this hour which made things worse. She was almost fully convinced that he left her; it was just like the time when he had Geostigma and had gone without even a single explanation. But then, that time he had said goodbye. Maybe the kids was the only reason that forced him to bid farewell, for back then he felt as if he owed them that little goodbye before departing. Now that the children were no longer living with them, was Cloud leaving with no goodbye?

As Tifa sat quietly on the couch with her legs stretched before her and a pillow pulled closely to her chest, she was suffering alone again. The bar was closed, it was dark. She was afraid to turn on the lights for fear of seeing those happy photos on the wall of the children, Cloud and her. All smiling, so happy, so whole. Her brain could think of nothing but the doubt eating inside her. Unable to think practically, she realized the pessimism had finally got to her, preventing her from thinking straight. Things constantly occurred this way when it related to Cloud. She had been let down once, and had forever anticipated to be let down again.

Pulling the soft, smooth pillow closer, it appeared to be no comfort for her. Her mind was reeling with negative thoughts. It would be better if he left. Then I won't have to be disappointed and hurt anymore. It's always been this way, I'm never enough. Maybe, now that he's gone I can finally become reliant on myself instead of depending on him for everything. It's not like we were a family to begin with. Tifa painfully thought. His words of agreeing to leave came rushing into her brain, and it fully convinced her that he was never coming back.

But he didn't even say goodbye…

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The clock stroke one in the morning, Tifa had prepared to accept the fact that Cloud wasn't returning. Listening to the clock tick loudly, Tifa made a mental note to herself that she should stop waiting for him. She already had lost all hopes in him, but part of her heart was tugging at the thought that she was just jumping to conclusions. Conclusions or not, there was sufficient evidence for her to believe that Cloud was never coming back. He hadn't made a delivery, never called back like he usually did. As she balanced these judgments, the door suddenly flung open as his familiar footsteps could be heard on the wooden floorboards. Tifa turned, waiting for him and she couldn't hide the relief that came rushing over her. Half throwing the pillow onto the couch, she went to stand before him.

His eyes scanned across her, "It's late." Was all he said to her.

She had been expecting an explanation from him, but as she observed him making his way past her and upstairs she felt angered. She had been worried sick, and had been doubting him. The least he could do was provide an explanation. A short one, or a long one, or maybe even use one single word to enlighten her mood was good enough for her. But he didn't. All he said was 'It's late' and was now walking off, dismissing her.

"Why did you come back?" Tifa couldn't resist. She was angry.

At her words, he paused at the beginning of the staircase. His back presented before her, he was mute. Silence filled the air, and Cloud didn't open his mouth to reply. She simply stood motionless.

"Why did you return Cloud? Why are you continuing to give me false hope?" She whispered, barely audible. "You didn't answer my calls, or even bothered to return one. You hadn't made a single delivery today which encouraged me to believe that you left me. Now that everything is set, why did you return? I already prepared myself for your departure," He remained silent. His peace gave her more confidence to speak. It gave her more to reveal to him. "If the only thing holding you back is the promise you made, I don't need you to keep your word. It was long ago, and I'll be fine alone. You make your own decisions, and sometimes I wonder where I stand in your life. You walked out on me when you had Geostigma and you didn't even bother to tell me you've been infected. You had no intentions of fighting it," She stopped. She made no sense at all, but her emotions and the irritation she was experiencing made no sense to her. Tears came forth.

"You've been selfish Cloud. I can't do everything on my own; can't you see you're the only support I have to keep me going?" Tifa leaned forward a little to him in fury with her hands held tightly. "It's not like that for you is it? I never meant anything to you." She finished with a whisper. Stepping a tiny pace back, she took in a breath and continued, for words seemed to be populating her mouth. "Leave to pursue your own dreams; I don't need you protecting me. In the end I don't need to be protected from people or fiends, I just need to be isolated from you." She stated bluntly as she made her way to the door.

She twisted back only to find his backside still facing her. Even at a time like this when she was spilling her heart out for him he couldn't so much as look at her. The door stood ajar, "You hurt me," she sniffed and to her disgust more tears flowed as she exited, closing the door behind her. She commenced walking away, leaving him in his own presence.

Her words sank deep into him. He couldn't speak, he knew she was hurt and angry because of his silence but he knew that if he had said anything, words would have failed him. Knowing no words would escape his mouth he began to despise himself for his lack of words, and lack of expression at urgent times like this. Whether he forced himself to make a move or not, he was sure that either way he would have lost her. If he stopped her, he wouldn't be able to communicate his feelings towards her. Besides wouldn't it be better to let her go hating him?

Cloud felt his guard collapsing before his very eyes. She was always the one to remain so strong even during battles, and between life and death situations. Throughout everything, Tifa had always been the last one standing. He never knew he would ever see her breakdown. He hated seeing her cry. And he wished so much he could wipe away those tears that were now spilling down her pretty face. Breathing in, he ascended the stairs to his room. He carefully packed away the photo of Tifa, Marlene, Denzel and him into his pocket as if the photo was a jewel, so precious when held. It was time he went to do something.

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Tifa sauntered down the empty, dark streets of Midgar. Tears blurred her vision, as she kept on walking unable to turn back. Her pride had been damaged, her heart broken. She loved him; he was everything to her, but her love was never enough to make him love her back. The night was cold, the occasional breeze sending goosebumps all over her body. She had left in such a hurry that she hadn't taken a jacket with her. But what did a jacket matter when you were angry and crying?

She was wished so hard that he would come after her, but he let her down again. Now as she trudged down the road, the only place on her mind at the moment was the area in which she had spent those last days with Denzel and Marlene. Using the back of her hand to wipe away the tears, she started running. Running for that beautiful area where it never failed to make her happy because she had blissful memories there. And the one and only thing she needed right now, was a smile on her face. Little did she know, the one who had caused the tears, was the only one who could cause the laughter in an instant.

A/N: A new chapter to start the new year off. May this be a successful, happy, and safe new year for everyone and let's just call this year a new begginning too : D

Thanks to anime-diva for the help, now anonymous reviewers can review! So after reading, EVERYBODY can review. Pretty please review! Many thanks! Oh, and this chapter doesn't explain what happened to Cloud, so I guess you readers might have to wait a bit more! I promise you won't have to wait too long... Cheers!