Disclaimer: Just to let you all know. I neither own the characters nor the copy right on them. I'm just obsessed about them and think about them way too much

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Chapter 8 The Road Last Taken

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There are some things that, once done, can never be undone. There are some paths that, once we start down them, we can never turn back from.

That was the first thought that popped into Karla's head. For the first time in her life Karla was beginning to understand what those statements meant. Before, when she had thought of those things, she had thought of actions. When you break something you can't magically un-break it. When you hit someone you can't turn back the clock and un-hit them. Never had she thought in terms of omissions. She did now.

Since people were getting up, Karla assumed that Aragorn must have said where they were going, but some how it just didn't register in her brain. Nothing seemed to register in her brain. Gandalf was dead, fallen into fire and shadow. He was gone, and it was her fault. That was the only thought she seemed able to carry.

"Come, we must hurry. We dare not linger any longer."

Aragorn's voice calling out to all in the Company jarred Karla from her reverie. It was true, they didn't have time to sit and mope. Instead, they must flee at once before the orcs came, or what other evil might live in Moria.

Just thinking of that name gave Karla the shivers. Moria. More like death embodied, a living graveyard, a living tomb; a monument to the valiant death of Gandalf the Grey. So much meaning for so little a word.

But she didn't have time to dwell on such thoughts. Already Karla could see the others moving, heading to wherever Strider was leading. Although how he handled his grief so well was a mystery to her. She knew she had to be strong, she just didn't know how.

"Are you alright, little one?" The hand that touched her shoulder almost made her jump. She hadn't heard Boromir come up beside her, so wrapped up had she been in her own thoughts.

"Sure. I'm fine."

"Then come. Aragorn is right. We must hurry. Soon these hills will be teeming with orcs, and we need to be well away before they are."

"But where will we go?"

"I do not know, little one, but I am sure that Aragorn had discussed this with Gandalf." At least Boromir hoped he had. For him, this whole journey seemed like an ill-fated disaster and this last incident just seemed to reinforce that thought. He still felt it would be so much better to take the ring to Gondor and from there, attack their enemy. What better way to defeat an enemy that to turn his strength against him? But alas, it was a shame that no one could see the wisdom of that.

Watching Pippin get up, Boromir was amazed at the resilience of the hobbits. He could see by how the hobbits moved that they were all exhausted, and even reeling in their grief each got up and started moving, following Aragorn as though he, and he alone were their beacon the only guiding light in the darkness. Shaking his head, Boromir tried to clear his thoughts. This was neither the time nor the place for such way-ward ideas.

If Karla had been able to read Boromir's thoughts she would have been surprised. To her, his penetrating stare was proof that even he knew of her guilt. If he was aware of her failing, then she was sure that everyone was. How could they not? Didn't all but Legolas and Gimli know Pippin better than Boromir?

But at least for the moment she knew she had something to do, something she could do. She had to run.

Run she needed to do and so run she did. It seemed like forever that Aragorn had them running, and at a pace that she didn't think was hobbitly possible. Didn't he realise that such short legs weren't meant to cover such long distances. Didn't any of them realise that? Then again, after failing so miserably in Moria, it didn't seem like her place to point out such shortcomings to anyone, let alone the leader of the Company. If the others could keep moving, she would too. Even if it was the last thing she did, she would keep up, which was a pretty fair statement since it felt like it really would be the last thing she did.

But looking back Legolas was amazed to see how far back the hobbits had fallen. It hardly seemed possible that they could have outdistanced the hobbits so easily, while even Gimli was able to keep up. "Aragorn, we must slow down."

"Legolas, we haven't the time. We are so close to Lothlorien and there is no doubt that Sauron's minions are on our trail even as we speak."

"That is true, but the hobbits aren't able to keep up. Already they fall farther and farther behind."

Looking back Aragorn mouthed an expletive of disgust for not having noticed how far back the hobbits had fallen, especially Frodo, who's safety should have been first on his mind. "Legolas, hold up here. Boromir, come with me."

Turning back Aragorn, noticing Sam and Frodo's injuries had Boromir carry Sam, while he carried Frodo as they continued on their way searching for a safe place to camp. In his grief over Gandalf's death and his need to get the Company to safety, Aragorn had almost forgotten about the injury Frodo had received from the Orc Chieftain as well as Sam's injuries in his valiant efforts to defend Frodo, using what little skills he had. Thankfully, it wasn't long before Aragorn found a suitable campsite at which to inspect the hobbts' injuries.

Finding a safe campsite, Boromir went off in search of game for dinner while Merry, Karla and Gimli set up camp, making a fire and boiling water that Karla was sure Aragorn would need to tend to the injured Sam and Frodo. Didn't doctors always ask for boiling water when tending the sick? If nothing else, at least it was something Karla felt that she could do right.

But watching Aragorn out of the corner of her eyes, Karla couldn't help but feel the guilt of the injuries that he tended weighing heavily upon her shoulders. Would they have been injured if she had mentioned to everyone the dangers of going into Moria? Would they have believed her if she had?

As she tended the campfire and made preparations for dinner, as Sam wouldn't be able to cook, Karla couldn't help but wallow in her own misery, contemplating her own culpability in the whole affair. But unbeknownst to Karla, while she had been watching the others, the others had been watching her. It would seem a silent Pippin was a noticeable Pippin.

Legolas, the first to be concerned, moved closer to Aragorn to speak to him, so as not to concern the others in case his observations were in error. But noticing how silent the young hobbit was, he didn't think so.

"Aragorn, have you noticed anything unusual about Pippin?" Legolas asked, speaking in Elvish so as not to concern the others.

"I was beginning to wonder myself," Aragorn replied back in Elvish. "I don't remember ever not hearing Pippin for so long before. Even on the road from Amon Sul to Rivendell, after Frodo had been injured, I still remember Pippin's voice breaking the monotony of the journey." Not only did it break the monotony of the journey, but to Aragorn it seemed that the chatty little hobbit lightened everyone's spirit as well.

Looking back at the hobbit, both the man and the elf were concerned at the far-off look in the hobbit's eyes. In his stillness it looked as though all sound, all motion had been removed from Pippin's vicinity.

"I've never seen him like this before, you know."

Although trained to be aware of their surroundings, neither Legolas nor Aragorn heard Merry's approach, so caught up were they in their silent observations of Pippin. In actual fact, it took all their training not to jump when he spoke. But keeping a calm façade, they both turned to Merry, looking as though neither was in the least concerned about their young charge.

"I'd speak to him, but I don't know what to say."

"Try not to worry Merry. He's had a bit of a shock, that's all. He'll be his old self in no time." Looking at Merry, Aragorn only hoped he wasn't misleading him.

"Maybe if you spoke to him. He's kinda started to look up to you." Merry couldn't help but hope that Aragorn could fix this problem, whatever it was. For the first time in his life, Merry felt completely out of his element in dealing with his cousin. In the past things had been simpler. Pippin had been, well, Pippin. But this new Pippin, Merry just didn't know how to deal with him.

Getting up, Aragorn went over to sit next to Pippin, noticing for the first time the utter stillness in that tiny body. Somehow Pippin had always just seemed to exude energy, as though he were in a constant state of perpetual motion.

"It's funny, but I don't even remember the first time I met Gandalf…" Aragorn began, hoping that by talking he could help the young hobbit through the trauma. Sitting down next to Pippin, Aragorn tried to act as though nothing was the matter, all the while hoping Pippin would come out of whatever shell he had climbed into.

Turning to look at him Karla knew he was up to something. How could he not be? Pippin might never have picked up on it, but she did and the only thing she knew to do was play along. "Did you know him a very long time?"

"You could say that. He was always popping in and out of my life as far back as I can remember."

"I guess you have a lot of good memories of Gandalf."

"Some good, some not so good."

Surprised at such a candid response, Karla could only stare at Aragorn, wondering how he could say something like that. Didn't people always talk about the good things about people when they died? Wasn't it wrong to speak ill of the dead?

"I see I have surprised you Pippin. Gandalf and I have had some wonderful adventures and I will miss him greatly. But other times I would have sworn that it felt like he was manipulating my life."

"So, what did you do about that?"

"I spoke to Lord Elrond about it. He assured me that if Gandalf was involved in my life, manipulating it or not, then he was there for a reason, and a good one at that."

"Do you believe he was put there for a reason then?" Almost afraid to breathe, Karla couldn't help but ask the question that so mirrored the one in her soul. Had she been sent to Middle Earth for a reason too?

Looking at Pippin, almost as if understanding the unasked question, Aragorn paused before proceeding, needing to think carefully about how to answer. "I think everything that happens happens for a reason. We both affect others and are affected by others. We just might not understand it or see it at the time."

Seeing the understanding in his eyes, Karla suddenly felt free to proceed. It was as though some unspoken force had given her the green light to tell Aragorn all about the mess she has found herself in. "I just don't understand why I'm here." The question just poured out of Karla before she had the presence of mind to think about it.

Of all the things that Pippin could have said, that was the one thing that Aragorn was not prepared for. From the start young Pippin had seemed so sure of his place within the Fellowship, so sure of his right to be there. To be confronted with such a question had Aragorn taking a mental step or two back. "You're here because Lord Elrond picked you to be part of this Fellowship. You are an important part of this Company and that is not something to be taken lightly."

"I don't understand. Elrond could have picked anyone. There were a lot of people wanting to go."

"That is very true. But he picked you. And this Fellowship would not be what it is if it were not for you."

"No doubt. It would have been a lot better, I'm sure. I shouldn't even be here."

Not knowing where Pippin was going with that, Aragorn was at a loss on how to continue. Yet continue he must, if he were going to be of any help to the hobbit. "Pippin, have you ever considered that maybe there was more to our Fellowship than the 9 of us?"

"More? What more could there be?"

"There could be nine people working together to form one unit."

"What's the difference?"

"Together we are a team."

"A team with one weak link."

Smiling for the first time, Aragorn took a deep breath; he finally understood the despair emanating from the poor hobbit. "Actually, we're a team with nine weak links. And that is our greatest strength."

Looking at Aragorn as though he had completely lost his mind, not to mention all semblance of common sense, Karla didn't know how to respond to such an insane remark. What strength could there possibly be in weakness? Wasn't that an oxymoron or something?

"Uh, let me get this straight. The fact that we have so many weak links is our greatest strength."

"That is correct."

"Well then, do our strengths become our greatest weakness?"

"Actually, they do."

Thinking that Aragorn was trying to pull one over on her, Karla began to feel angry.

"Right, and I'm suppose to believe this because…?"

"If someone were to ask you to list three strengths and three weaknesses of Legolas and Gimli, what would you say?"

"Well…" Karla began, not wanting to sound judgemental of her friends. Top know her friends had faults was one thing, to actively list them off was another.

"Ok then," Aragorn cut in, seeing where Pippin's hesitation was coming from, "would you say that the strengths and the weakness for Legolas and Gimli were the same?"

"Well, of course not. Legolas is amazing with the bow and Gimli's axe is like an extension of his arm, his very being."

"Very true. And I'd be surprised if Gimli even knew how to hold a bow, let alone shoot an arrow."

At Aragorn's words, Karla's jaw all but hit the ground. To say it so bluntly, and about their friends too, took her completely by surprise. She didn't know how to respond to that.

"But, Legolas' skill with the bow off sets Gimli's lack of skill, and to honest, I wouldn't trust Legolas with an axe even if I were ten feet away. But don't tell him I said that." With a conspiratorial wink, Aragorn waited, hoping Pippin would understand. But after a brief pause, Aragorn continued.

"The whole, our Fellowship, is more than simply the sum of its parts, its members. It is a whole made greater because of its parts and you are a part of this fellowship, an important part.

"But…" Karla began, but before she could get very far, Aragorn cut her off.

"Let me put it this way. Of everyone in the Fellowship, who would you say has the best eyesight?"

"Well, that's pretty easy. I think Legolas has demonstrated many times how superior his eyesight is."

Aragorn couldn't help but smile over the way that Pippin phrased that answer. "OK then, who would you say has the worst eyesight?"

Karla had to think about that one. Mentally making a list to see who she thought had the worst eyesight, she finally came up with the fact that it seemed, at least to her, that Sam had the worst eyesight. Voicing her answer, she wondered if Aragorn would agree with that, or if maybe Pippin had worse eyesight than she did.

"True enough. Sam does seem to be a bit weak in the eyes, when compared to the rest of the hobbits. But let me ask you another question."

"OK, what is it?"

"On our way to Caradhras, when you and Merry were practicing sword fighting, who first noticed the crebain?"

"I'm not sure. I don't think I paid that much attention." But thinking about it, Karla wasn't sure if she didn't remember or not. Somewhere in the back of her mind she seemed to remember Sam talking to Strider about some moving clouds that he saw. "Wasn't it Sam? I seem to remember him pointing out some moving clouds to you. Or am I wrong?"

Trying not to laugh at Pippin's round-a-bout way of answering the question, Aragorn had to agree that Sam was, indeed, the one who first noticed the crebain.

"But what does that prove?"

"You, yourself, already said how Sam had the weakest eyesight in the Fellowship, but he was still able to see the crebain before anyone else did."

"So?"

"So, without him the crebain would most likely have lead Sauron's army right to us before we could have gotten away. By looking for danger Sam bought us the time to hide. Sam didn't stop trying to look for danger, even though he has the weakest eyes among us."

"OK, so what you're saying is that our weakness is only really a weakness if we let it be."

"What I am saying is that we all have weaknesses, I more than most. The important thing is to not let those weaknesses stop us from being who we are and doing what we need to do." Looking at Pippin, trying to instil some confidence into the young hobbit, Aragorn wasn't sure how much of the conversation Pippin really understood. "Just remember this one thing: You are an important member of this Fellowship. Without you we are less than we ever could be with you. Never forget that."

Feeling as though the rug had been pulled out from under her, Karla was silent once again.

But this time, she was silent for an entirely different reason.

"But come Pippin. I don't think I've ever seen a hobbit go as long without food as you have recently."

And although she didn't understand why she was there, Karla was beginning to wonder if her being in Middle Earth was more than just bad luck.

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I just want to thank everyone for their patience with this story, and rest assured, I will finish it . I do apologise for the long interval between chapters.

And an especially big THANKYOU to everyone who as sent me a review. I have appreciated every last one of them.