Chapter 14
Author: Hey! It is I, your lordess and master, Aeris/Author! Mwahahahhaha, okay I'll shut up. Well, okay, maybe I won't shut up. Thanks for all the reviews. And the 1000 words stuff, thank you all a lot. It saved Sephy-poo, here.
Sephiroth: (walks in with all his long beautiful locks) Don't call me that.
Kuja: I thought you lost all your hair!!!!!
Kain: Yeah! And you looked like Dante's twin or something.
Dante: I'm the better looking one.
Ashley: (who just popped up) How did you regrow you hair?!
Sephiroth: When you cut my hair, you forgot one important thing, mate.
Ashley: What?
Sephiroth: I'm Captain Jack Sparrow! Wait! No. No, I'm Sephiroth! Yeah............ I need to stop watching that movie.
Author: (now in Lulu Goth wear) Yes, Sephiroth, you need help. But don't we all? Sephiroth got his hair back because I am the author and my will is all. Well, and also that he has Jenova cells in him and somehow it allows him to grow his hair back in just a few weeks.
Sephiroth: (kneeling before Aeris/Author in her Lulu costume again) My gods that dress you good on you!
Author: (embarrassed) Er, thanks?
Sephiroth: But it would look even better on my bedroom floor, baby!
(A display of flowers and hearts appears while elevator music plays in the background. "Please stand by.........." Is written in the background.)
Vincent: Due to the intense violence, we apologize. (Looks at Sephiroth's bleeding body)
Author: (covered in blood. Not hers, but Sephiroth's) Sorry 'bout that.
Ashley: oh, my! (Devil horns sprout from her head) HOW NIFTY!
Akira Kijo: Hey! There's where my devil horns went! Grrr!
Author: (Hugs Akira) HI! We should start that stupid chapter now.
Legolas: Hey, aren't you a little messy?
Link: (faints at the sight of all the blood)
Kain: Aeris/author? (Licks his lips at the sight of her, bloody and in the Lulu outfit) I could lick you clean.
(Again, a display of flowers and hearts appears while elevator music plays in the background. "Please stand by.........." Is written in the background.)
Everyone that hasn't been beaten bloody: (stares at Aeris/Author)
Author: (Even bloodier) I'm getting hungry. My dad used puppies to pick up chicks at parks, that's how he met my mom. Okay, no more delays! START! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Silky smooth Chapter 14!
While I wear my Kos-Mos outfit, the pigeons fly to Santa Clause (FLUFF! BE WARNED!). I think accents are sexy, especially British ones. Aeris was walking slowly towards the battle arena in Olympus. The Olympus stadium. Her green eyes scanned the dusty stadium for any signs of the enemy. She went into a serious battle stance when she saw a ripple in the air above her, letting out a single black feather to float down to the ground before her. Black boots followed the feather's example and gently touched the ground, revealing the deadly foe of Aeris.
"Sephiroth!" Aeris growled, holding up her staff for battle.
"Aeris!" He whispered evilly in return, gripping his Masamune tightly in his right hand. His single black wing spread outward quickly, commencing the battle as he rushed full speed towards her and she to him.
Their weapons clashed together fiercely and 'twas a bloody battle. Sweat and blood streamed down both their faces and they came to together, face-to- face, with their weapons locked together. They glared and pushed against the other's weapon, trying to get the other to yield. Aeris finally broke the connection and leapt swiftly backwards before Sephiroth could strike her in the air. Clothes torn, bloody and covered in the arena's dust, Aeris spat blood out to the side. Sephiroth stood up and smirked, chuckling at her. Aeris peeled her eyes at him suspiciously. He dropped his head back and laughed fully in a malicious way. His black wing and his body shook with laughter as she looked at him dumbfounded and confused.
"Quit laughing and fight, damn it!" Aeris clenched her fist at him as he continued to laugh. He laughed even harder at her.
Without any warning, he shot forward and had her pinned against the Coliseum's wall with her weapon knocked out of hand before she could even blink. He grinned wickedly at her petite figure and began to strangle her throat. Aeris gasped for air but to no avail. (Evil sadistic Sephy! I just love him that way!)
"no......... let go........." Aeris' voice rasped under his bloody gloved hands. She was getting weaker and began to see spots. His eyes pierced hers in great determination. She shut her eyes, grating her teeth as she used the last ounce of strength to try and remove his grip from her. However, she failed and felt her lungs burn from lack of oxygen. A single tear rolled down her cheek and Sephiroth saw this.
His sadistic smirk softened to a calm smile. Slowly, he let go and watched her gasp in air as she almost fell to her knees. He caught her in his arms and steadied her while she coughed madly for several minutes before snapping her face up at him with a look of sheer confusion.
"Wha –"She began to say, yet was cut off when Sephiroth hastily brought his face to hers and kissed her deeply. The whole time, Aeris' mind was screaming: 'WHAT THE F(^$& IS GOING ON?!?!?!' Yet she did nothing about it, in fact, she was sorta enjoying it. (Mmmmmmm, minty! I'm listening to '1000 words' right now, which makes me very sentimental, so back off!)
Everything faded into white and finally Aeris could see again. She was wearing a white apron and stirring a bowl of cake mixture. She looked around confused beyond all reason. She surveyed her surroundings to find that she was in her own house, yet she was not alone. Aeris could hear a deep voice and several children giggling in the other room. Still holding the bowl, Aeris exited the kitchen to investigate what was going on. Once she turned the corner, she almost dropped the cake mixture due to what she saw before her. Sephiroth was sitting on the sofa, smiling down at three children that sat at his feet. He was wearing a normal black long-sleeved shirt and black slacks as the children laughed. Two of the kids, twin girls, had silver hair like Sephiroth. The third child, who was a boy, had the same color of hair as Aeris did. Sephiroth went on talking when the kids stopped laughing.
"......... And that, kids, was how I met your mother." Sephiroth told them, before noticing Aeris standing in the doorway with her jaw dropped. He got up to approach her. "Sweetheart! How's the cake?"
Aeris flung cake mixture into the air, which landed on Sephiroth's head, and shrieked at the realization of what was going on. She kept screaming and sat up quickly, stopping after a few seconds to breathe in air. She blinked and looked around. She was back in her room of the haunted hotel. She was still shaking.
"WHAT THE HELL!??!?! What kind of freakin' dream was that?!" Aeris demanded of herself. She got out of her bed and noticed that she was still wearing her pink dress. Before she could do anything, the door flew open and Sephiroth came running in with the other guys right behind him.
"Aeris! Are you alright?!" Sephiroth asked. Aeris looked at him and screamed before jumping back unto her bed and under her covers. He was quite taken back from her reaction. "What?"
"MOLESTATION!!!!!!" Aeris shrieked from under the covers.
"What?!" Sephiroth asked as he immediately turned towards Kain. He glared evilly at Kain, cracking his knuckles in a threatening manner.
"WHAT?!?! I didn't do anything!!!" Kain said innocently, holding up his hands to try and prove himself.
"......... Right." Sephiroth said sarcastically. "And I'm a pink Chocobo, adorned in cute little frilly bows and–"
"Okay! Enough of this!" Aeris said, flinging the covers off. "Nothing is wrong, I just had a really insane dream. That's all. I think that we should get ready and leave for Midgar."
"Um, okay." They replied, leaving for their rooms. Sephiroth, however, stayed behind and watched Aeris as she pulled out her suitcase, unaware of his presence.
"Is everything okay, Aeris?" Sephiroth asked quietly, startling her. He stood calmly, watching her spin around rapidly.
"N-no, I mean, yes! Everything's okay! I thought I told you to go pack." Aeris replied nervously.
"Why are you so jumpy?" Sephiroth asked, grinning contentedly as he stepped closer to her.
"I-I'm just tired, that's all." Aeris said, stepping backwards into the bed as he closed the distance between them.
"Why are you nervous, Aeris?" Sephiroth asked smoothly. She didn't reply when he stood right in front of her. "Aeris, I must ask you, how do you feel about me?"
"I, um, I –"Aeris was now shaking, remembering what had happened in her dream. Sephiroth bent over and she could feel his breath on her neck.
"Oh, Aeris......... I just wanted you to know that......... That I love—"Sephiroth began. However, he was cut off when a wild pack of moogles came crashing through the bedroom window to their right. The moogles trampled over Sephiroth right in front of a stunned and confused Aeris in a desperate attempt to escape from Link that hotly pursued them. Link tripped over Sephiroth's stampeded body, while the moogles fled out the door. (HA! And you thought ya'll was ganna get somethin'! No, not yet.)
"NO! Aw, crap monkeys! They got away!" Link cried as he got up and brushed himself off. "I was ganna try and fly with them strapped to my back!"
"I'M GANNA MAKE YOU FLY!!! TO YOUR DEATH!!! YOU RUINED THE MOMENT!!!!! YOU ARE SO GOING TO BE DEAD BEFORE YOUR BODY HITS THE GROUND THOUGH, YOU DO KNOW THAT, DON'T YOU?!!!!" Sephiroth roared when he got off the floor. He began to chase the elf-like virgin as the elf-like virgin ran for his life. Sephiroth chased Link out of Aeris' room and she was left alone again. Pork loins.
"The moment?" Aeris muttered in bewilderment. Metaphorically, love is trying to beat her in the head with a shovel until she understood; yet she is STILL oblivious. Poor Aeris, as dense as they come. She forced herself to stop trembling and went back to packing. "I'm so confused right now."
An hour later......... with the soy sauce I now lovingly refer to as the mantra of DOOM!
"Is everyone ready to leave?" Aeris asked the group of men/vampires/elves/monkey-tailed sorcerers/genetically half-aliens/half demons. They all nodded. Aeris noticed that someone was missing. "Where's Link?"
"Hiding from his impending death." Sephiroth muttered too low for anyone to hear.
"Hi, Aeris." Link ran up behind Aeris, trying to hide from Sephiroth's line of sight. Though, not doing a really good job at it, Sephiroth kept giving him the evil eye. I'm burning you with my mind. Grrrrr! Okay, now I'm getting a headache.
"Okay! Let's get back to the Highwind then!" Aeris jumped up and down in excitement, laughing like a little schoolgirl. Thus they marched out of the Haunted Hotel and to the Gold Saucer lift, boarding it and watching the view as they came back down to ground level. They then made their way through North Corel, saying hi and goodbye to Barret and Marlene, who was trying to keep Barret from pummeling some worker for breaking glass that was supposed to be used for a window. They left Coral and walked all the way back to the Highwind.
"Um......... Is this thing flyable? I mean, did we damage it at all?!"
"If you did *%#&ing brake something, which you had better *%#&ing not have, I think I would have *%#&ing fixed what needed *%#&ing fixin' when I was still drunk. So get the hell on!" Cid said in one of his nicer tones.
Everyone boarded in a mild rush in fear of getting a Venus Gospel stabbed into their ass. Skittles, taste the leprechaun! When everyone was ready and all was well, Cid started up the Highwind and they were off in the air. A minute after they were in flight, Cid was busy going over the navigations as Vincent comes into the control room to join him. Cid noticed him when he went to stand in his usual spot in the room. Cid paid him no mind and went back to steering the Highwind. A minute later, Link came running blindly into the room due to being chased by Sephiroth for earlier reasons. Cid was about to scream at them for '($^#ing around' before Link collided into him and they were both knocked out from a brutal head concussion. Sephiroth quickly grabbed the little Keabler-wannabe and dragged him out of the room so that he may administer a severe beating on the little virgin. Vincent stood silently, watching the whole ordeal with no change of emotion at all. He looked around cautiously before walking over the unconscious Cid and over to the steering wheel thingy. He grinned slightly before beginning to steer the airship.
'Wheeeeeeeeee!!!' Vincent squealed inside his mind giddily. He turned the wheel back and forth, going right and left over and over. After several more minutes, the Highwind began to jolt (Mmmmmmm, Jolt! Full of caffeine!) and swerve to where Vincent grew uncomfortable. The Highwind was also beginning to loose power as it flew above a 'mysterious' waterfall. However, Vinny had read the panel and pushed the 'x-button', landing the Highwind on a small inlet of grass near the waterfall. Cid finally began to regain consciousness, screaming off his head at Vincent when he realized what happened. However, he was glad Vincent had landed it properly and went to see what went wrong after Vinny told him what happened. Everyone came into the control room to see what was the matter.
"Somethin' *&$#ing happened to the engine. I'm ganna need to *(%$#ing fix the s#it." Cid told them as he went for tools. "It's ganna take a while so *(&$ off! Damn thing!"
"Why do you think the engine died, Cid?" Aeris asked.
"How the hell should I know?!" he replied. Vincent turned to her solemnly.
"Well, it was almost as if an unseen force disturbed it and stopped the engine, like in the Bermuda Triangle." Vincent said.
"This planet doesn't have a Bermuda Triangle, Vincent." Aeris told him.
"Well, I'm going outside. I'm tired of being cooped up in this airship." Kuja said, the other guys that aren't from Aeris' world agreed and all went out. Aeris, Sephiroth, and Vincent all shrugged and went to join them as Cid got to work on the engine.
"OH &%$#! I didn't tell them about this damn place!" Cid muttered as he paused in his work when everyone was gone. He went back to it, thinking as he went. 'I wonder if Vincent will, or if he's just ganna go (%$%ing around in that cave me and Cloud went in the last time we were here?'
Outside......... Mentos, the fresh maker!
"OH! Such beautiful flowers!" Aeris cried in wonder as she ran to a side of a cliff where a verity of flowers grew near the grassy meadow. A large crater-like lake spanned outward from the waterfall to the right of the meadow, eventually leading out of the crater through a ravine in the mountains. Aeris quickly kneeled down, humming as she got to work picking and assorting flowers. The guys watched her for a few seconds before turning back to talk to one another. Vincent looked around slowly and decided to go off towards the 'mysterious' waterfall, only Sephiroth noticed his leave. Ten minutes past and Aeris was bundling together bouquets of flowers to take back to the Highwind with her, not noticing a sinister force looming from behind where she knelt. Twas Sephiroth, holding his Masamune in a ready position as he sneaked up to the young unaware woman. He quietly raised his blade and with one quick motion, used it for his evil purpose.
Aeris sat, wide-eyed with her dress lifted up by Sephiroth's blade and the guys all giggled and took pictures of her pink undies. It wasn't long before Sephiroth was running for dear life while being hotly pursued by Aeris and her sharp edged Princess Guard in one hand and a giant version of a Piko Hammer in the other. She chased him through the field, towards the 'mysterious' waterfall. The other guys were all laughing their asses off as they watched the scene.
Meanwhile, in the 'mysterious' cave, behind the 'mysterious' waterfall............
Vincent strode slowly across the smooth and crystal-like floor of the strange and 'mysterious' cave that lay behind the waterfall. He made his way to the throne-like crystal that was embedded at the end of the cave, running his cold fingers over the equally cold stone. It still glowed slightly from the last time he was here. He could almost smell the scent of the woman he once loved so dearly.
"Lucrecia........." Vincent murmured in remorse for not being able to save her. He closed his eyes and tried to remember the woman's face he cared for.
"Vincent? Is that you?" A female voice sounded softly behind the melancholy man. Vincent turned around to the face the voice, his eyes widening at whom he saw.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Link: Dum, Dum, Dummmmmmmm!!! Stay tuned for the next—
Author: HEY! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!!!
Link: (scared beyond all reason) um......... I'm just standing here and doing the cheesy announcer voice?
Sephiroth: (whispering to you people out there. Yes, you.) Please excuse her: it's that time of the month for her.
Dante: When Trish and Lucia are at that time of the month, they are worse than Mundus and all his hordes of demons. Female demons are scary! Aeris/Author is just as bad, if not worse. It's like watching the apocalypse, but without the horsemen and the pink flying bunnies.
Legolas: Oh gods.........
Kain: TAKE COVER!!!
Kuja: Um, Aeris/Author, honey? Let's simmer down—
Author: WHEN THE HELL DID I SAY YOU COULD TALK TO ME?!!!!!!
Vincent: ...............
Sephiroth: (now scared as well) Aeris/Author, please try and calm down.
Author: (Evilness) SHUT UP AND GET ME SOMETHING TO EAT!!!!!!! (Ashley, Elisha and Akira Kijo walk in. Immediately switches to cute and happy) Hiya guys!
Ashley, Elisha and Akira Kijo: Hey! What's up?!
Vincent: The storm has gone.........
Sephiroth: No kidding.
Author: NAKED WUFFEIS FALLING FROM THE SKY!
Akira Kijo: YEAH!
Kain: Er, yeahhhhhhhhhhhh......... wtf?
Author: (turns to the audience) Sorry for the delay on updating. I've been busy with all sorts of things. I'm in my school's play, I've got lots of homework, there's a mongoose infestation in my computer, my sister's the embodiment of Satan, I could go on and on, yet I won't. I also had a nasty writer's block demon possessing my mind until a stabbed it out with the sharp edge of an electric toothbrush. The doctor says the wounds might heal in a few months so I'm happy again. Hey, I make this crap up and write it as I go, peoples, so at times I don't know what's ganna happen next. It usually comes to me as dreams. Seriously. What?!!!?! You don't believe me?!?!?! YOU WANNA TAKE THIS OUTSIDE?!?!?!? I KNOW WHERE YOU SLEEP!!!!!!
Sephiroth: Kinky.
Ashley: (devil horns appear while she pulls on Sephiroth's hair) So it's NOT a wig!
Sephiroth: LEGGO!
Legolas: What?!!
Sephiroth: No! I mean LET GO!
Ashley: (sees Kuja and runs to vex him) KUJI!!!
Kuja: OH LORD!!! (Runs away while being followed by Ashley)
Elisha: (hugs Vincent) Wheeee!
Author: Yo, Akira! Thanks for letting me borrow Vampire Hunter D; Bloodlust. I LOVE THAT MOVIEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
Akira Kijo: Sure (smiles so cutely)
Author: Chalk Spot
Akira Kijo: You are soooo dead! Grrr!
Author: Mwahahahah! Well, I'm ganna go sleep, it's almost two in the morning and the Jolt has worn off. Goobye.
Author: Hey! It is I, your lordess and master, Aeris/Author! Mwahahahhaha, okay I'll shut up. Well, okay, maybe I won't shut up. Thanks for all the reviews. And the 1000 words stuff, thank you all a lot. It saved Sephy-poo, here.
Sephiroth: (walks in with all his long beautiful locks) Don't call me that.
Kuja: I thought you lost all your hair!!!!!
Kain: Yeah! And you looked like Dante's twin or something.
Dante: I'm the better looking one.
Ashley: (who just popped up) How did you regrow you hair?!
Sephiroth: When you cut my hair, you forgot one important thing, mate.
Ashley: What?
Sephiroth: I'm Captain Jack Sparrow! Wait! No. No, I'm Sephiroth! Yeah............ I need to stop watching that movie.
Author: (now in Lulu Goth wear) Yes, Sephiroth, you need help. But don't we all? Sephiroth got his hair back because I am the author and my will is all. Well, and also that he has Jenova cells in him and somehow it allows him to grow his hair back in just a few weeks.
Sephiroth: (kneeling before Aeris/Author in her Lulu costume again) My gods that dress you good on you!
Author: (embarrassed) Er, thanks?
Sephiroth: But it would look even better on my bedroom floor, baby!
(A display of flowers and hearts appears while elevator music plays in the background. "Please stand by.........." Is written in the background.)
Vincent: Due to the intense violence, we apologize. (Looks at Sephiroth's bleeding body)
Author: (covered in blood. Not hers, but Sephiroth's) Sorry 'bout that.
Ashley: oh, my! (Devil horns sprout from her head) HOW NIFTY!
Akira Kijo: Hey! There's where my devil horns went! Grrr!
Author: (Hugs Akira) HI! We should start that stupid chapter now.
Legolas: Hey, aren't you a little messy?
Link: (faints at the sight of all the blood)
Kain: Aeris/author? (Licks his lips at the sight of her, bloody and in the Lulu outfit) I could lick you clean.
(Again, a display of flowers and hearts appears while elevator music plays in the background. "Please stand by.........." Is written in the background.)
Everyone that hasn't been beaten bloody: (stares at Aeris/Author)
Author: (Even bloodier) I'm getting hungry. My dad used puppies to pick up chicks at parks, that's how he met my mom. Okay, no more delays! START! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Silky smooth Chapter 14!
While I wear my Kos-Mos outfit, the pigeons fly to Santa Clause (FLUFF! BE WARNED!). I think accents are sexy, especially British ones. Aeris was walking slowly towards the battle arena in Olympus. The Olympus stadium. Her green eyes scanned the dusty stadium for any signs of the enemy. She went into a serious battle stance when she saw a ripple in the air above her, letting out a single black feather to float down to the ground before her. Black boots followed the feather's example and gently touched the ground, revealing the deadly foe of Aeris.
"Sephiroth!" Aeris growled, holding up her staff for battle.
"Aeris!" He whispered evilly in return, gripping his Masamune tightly in his right hand. His single black wing spread outward quickly, commencing the battle as he rushed full speed towards her and she to him.
Their weapons clashed together fiercely and 'twas a bloody battle. Sweat and blood streamed down both their faces and they came to together, face-to- face, with their weapons locked together. They glared and pushed against the other's weapon, trying to get the other to yield. Aeris finally broke the connection and leapt swiftly backwards before Sephiroth could strike her in the air. Clothes torn, bloody and covered in the arena's dust, Aeris spat blood out to the side. Sephiroth stood up and smirked, chuckling at her. Aeris peeled her eyes at him suspiciously. He dropped his head back and laughed fully in a malicious way. His black wing and his body shook with laughter as she looked at him dumbfounded and confused.
"Quit laughing and fight, damn it!" Aeris clenched her fist at him as he continued to laugh. He laughed even harder at her.
Without any warning, he shot forward and had her pinned against the Coliseum's wall with her weapon knocked out of hand before she could even blink. He grinned wickedly at her petite figure and began to strangle her throat. Aeris gasped for air but to no avail. (Evil sadistic Sephy! I just love him that way!)
"no......... let go........." Aeris' voice rasped under his bloody gloved hands. She was getting weaker and began to see spots. His eyes pierced hers in great determination. She shut her eyes, grating her teeth as she used the last ounce of strength to try and remove his grip from her. However, she failed and felt her lungs burn from lack of oxygen. A single tear rolled down her cheek and Sephiroth saw this.
His sadistic smirk softened to a calm smile. Slowly, he let go and watched her gasp in air as she almost fell to her knees. He caught her in his arms and steadied her while she coughed madly for several minutes before snapping her face up at him with a look of sheer confusion.
"Wha –"She began to say, yet was cut off when Sephiroth hastily brought his face to hers and kissed her deeply. The whole time, Aeris' mind was screaming: 'WHAT THE F(^$& IS GOING ON?!?!?!' Yet she did nothing about it, in fact, she was sorta enjoying it. (Mmmmmmm, minty! I'm listening to '1000 words' right now, which makes me very sentimental, so back off!)
Everything faded into white and finally Aeris could see again. She was wearing a white apron and stirring a bowl of cake mixture. She looked around confused beyond all reason. She surveyed her surroundings to find that she was in her own house, yet she was not alone. Aeris could hear a deep voice and several children giggling in the other room. Still holding the bowl, Aeris exited the kitchen to investigate what was going on. Once she turned the corner, she almost dropped the cake mixture due to what she saw before her. Sephiroth was sitting on the sofa, smiling down at three children that sat at his feet. He was wearing a normal black long-sleeved shirt and black slacks as the children laughed. Two of the kids, twin girls, had silver hair like Sephiroth. The third child, who was a boy, had the same color of hair as Aeris did. Sephiroth went on talking when the kids stopped laughing.
"......... And that, kids, was how I met your mother." Sephiroth told them, before noticing Aeris standing in the doorway with her jaw dropped. He got up to approach her. "Sweetheart! How's the cake?"
Aeris flung cake mixture into the air, which landed on Sephiroth's head, and shrieked at the realization of what was going on. She kept screaming and sat up quickly, stopping after a few seconds to breathe in air. She blinked and looked around. She was back in her room of the haunted hotel. She was still shaking.
"WHAT THE HELL!??!?! What kind of freakin' dream was that?!" Aeris demanded of herself. She got out of her bed and noticed that she was still wearing her pink dress. Before she could do anything, the door flew open and Sephiroth came running in with the other guys right behind him.
"Aeris! Are you alright?!" Sephiroth asked. Aeris looked at him and screamed before jumping back unto her bed and under her covers. He was quite taken back from her reaction. "What?"
"MOLESTATION!!!!!!" Aeris shrieked from under the covers.
"What?!" Sephiroth asked as he immediately turned towards Kain. He glared evilly at Kain, cracking his knuckles in a threatening manner.
"WHAT?!?! I didn't do anything!!!" Kain said innocently, holding up his hands to try and prove himself.
"......... Right." Sephiroth said sarcastically. "And I'm a pink Chocobo, adorned in cute little frilly bows and–"
"Okay! Enough of this!" Aeris said, flinging the covers off. "Nothing is wrong, I just had a really insane dream. That's all. I think that we should get ready and leave for Midgar."
"Um, okay." They replied, leaving for their rooms. Sephiroth, however, stayed behind and watched Aeris as she pulled out her suitcase, unaware of his presence.
"Is everything okay, Aeris?" Sephiroth asked quietly, startling her. He stood calmly, watching her spin around rapidly.
"N-no, I mean, yes! Everything's okay! I thought I told you to go pack." Aeris replied nervously.
"Why are you so jumpy?" Sephiroth asked, grinning contentedly as he stepped closer to her.
"I-I'm just tired, that's all." Aeris said, stepping backwards into the bed as he closed the distance between them.
"Why are you nervous, Aeris?" Sephiroth asked smoothly. She didn't reply when he stood right in front of her. "Aeris, I must ask you, how do you feel about me?"
"I, um, I –"Aeris was now shaking, remembering what had happened in her dream. Sephiroth bent over and she could feel his breath on her neck.
"Oh, Aeris......... I just wanted you to know that......... That I love—"Sephiroth began. However, he was cut off when a wild pack of moogles came crashing through the bedroom window to their right. The moogles trampled over Sephiroth right in front of a stunned and confused Aeris in a desperate attempt to escape from Link that hotly pursued them. Link tripped over Sephiroth's stampeded body, while the moogles fled out the door. (HA! And you thought ya'll was ganna get somethin'! No, not yet.)
"NO! Aw, crap monkeys! They got away!" Link cried as he got up and brushed himself off. "I was ganna try and fly with them strapped to my back!"
"I'M GANNA MAKE YOU FLY!!! TO YOUR DEATH!!! YOU RUINED THE MOMENT!!!!! YOU ARE SO GOING TO BE DEAD BEFORE YOUR BODY HITS THE GROUND THOUGH, YOU DO KNOW THAT, DON'T YOU?!!!!" Sephiroth roared when he got off the floor. He began to chase the elf-like virgin as the elf-like virgin ran for his life. Sephiroth chased Link out of Aeris' room and she was left alone again. Pork loins.
"The moment?" Aeris muttered in bewilderment. Metaphorically, love is trying to beat her in the head with a shovel until she understood; yet she is STILL oblivious. Poor Aeris, as dense as they come. She forced herself to stop trembling and went back to packing. "I'm so confused right now."
An hour later......... with the soy sauce I now lovingly refer to as the mantra of DOOM!
"Is everyone ready to leave?" Aeris asked the group of men/vampires/elves/monkey-tailed sorcerers/genetically half-aliens/half demons. They all nodded. Aeris noticed that someone was missing. "Where's Link?"
"Hiding from his impending death." Sephiroth muttered too low for anyone to hear.
"Hi, Aeris." Link ran up behind Aeris, trying to hide from Sephiroth's line of sight. Though, not doing a really good job at it, Sephiroth kept giving him the evil eye. I'm burning you with my mind. Grrrrr! Okay, now I'm getting a headache.
"Okay! Let's get back to the Highwind then!" Aeris jumped up and down in excitement, laughing like a little schoolgirl. Thus they marched out of the Haunted Hotel and to the Gold Saucer lift, boarding it and watching the view as they came back down to ground level. They then made their way through North Corel, saying hi and goodbye to Barret and Marlene, who was trying to keep Barret from pummeling some worker for breaking glass that was supposed to be used for a window. They left Coral and walked all the way back to the Highwind.
"Um......... Is this thing flyable? I mean, did we damage it at all?!"
"If you did *%#&ing brake something, which you had better *%#&ing not have, I think I would have *%#&ing fixed what needed *%#&ing fixin' when I was still drunk. So get the hell on!" Cid said in one of his nicer tones.
Everyone boarded in a mild rush in fear of getting a Venus Gospel stabbed into their ass. Skittles, taste the leprechaun! When everyone was ready and all was well, Cid started up the Highwind and they were off in the air. A minute after they were in flight, Cid was busy going over the navigations as Vincent comes into the control room to join him. Cid noticed him when he went to stand in his usual spot in the room. Cid paid him no mind and went back to steering the Highwind. A minute later, Link came running blindly into the room due to being chased by Sephiroth for earlier reasons. Cid was about to scream at them for '($^#ing around' before Link collided into him and they were both knocked out from a brutal head concussion. Sephiroth quickly grabbed the little Keabler-wannabe and dragged him out of the room so that he may administer a severe beating on the little virgin. Vincent stood silently, watching the whole ordeal with no change of emotion at all. He looked around cautiously before walking over the unconscious Cid and over to the steering wheel thingy. He grinned slightly before beginning to steer the airship.
'Wheeeeeeeeee!!!' Vincent squealed inside his mind giddily. He turned the wheel back and forth, going right and left over and over. After several more minutes, the Highwind began to jolt (Mmmmmmm, Jolt! Full of caffeine!) and swerve to where Vincent grew uncomfortable. The Highwind was also beginning to loose power as it flew above a 'mysterious' waterfall. However, Vinny had read the panel and pushed the 'x-button', landing the Highwind on a small inlet of grass near the waterfall. Cid finally began to regain consciousness, screaming off his head at Vincent when he realized what happened. However, he was glad Vincent had landed it properly and went to see what went wrong after Vinny told him what happened. Everyone came into the control room to see what was the matter.
"Somethin' *&$#ing happened to the engine. I'm ganna need to *(%$#ing fix the s#it." Cid told them as he went for tools. "It's ganna take a while so *(&$ off! Damn thing!"
"Why do you think the engine died, Cid?" Aeris asked.
"How the hell should I know?!" he replied. Vincent turned to her solemnly.
"Well, it was almost as if an unseen force disturbed it and stopped the engine, like in the Bermuda Triangle." Vincent said.
"This planet doesn't have a Bermuda Triangle, Vincent." Aeris told him.
"Well, I'm going outside. I'm tired of being cooped up in this airship." Kuja said, the other guys that aren't from Aeris' world agreed and all went out. Aeris, Sephiroth, and Vincent all shrugged and went to join them as Cid got to work on the engine.
"OH &%$#! I didn't tell them about this damn place!" Cid muttered as he paused in his work when everyone was gone. He went back to it, thinking as he went. 'I wonder if Vincent will, or if he's just ganna go (%$%ing around in that cave me and Cloud went in the last time we were here?'
Outside......... Mentos, the fresh maker!
"OH! Such beautiful flowers!" Aeris cried in wonder as she ran to a side of a cliff where a verity of flowers grew near the grassy meadow. A large crater-like lake spanned outward from the waterfall to the right of the meadow, eventually leading out of the crater through a ravine in the mountains. Aeris quickly kneeled down, humming as she got to work picking and assorting flowers. The guys watched her for a few seconds before turning back to talk to one another. Vincent looked around slowly and decided to go off towards the 'mysterious' waterfall, only Sephiroth noticed his leave. Ten minutes past and Aeris was bundling together bouquets of flowers to take back to the Highwind with her, not noticing a sinister force looming from behind where she knelt. Twas Sephiroth, holding his Masamune in a ready position as he sneaked up to the young unaware woman. He quietly raised his blade and with one quick motion, used it for his evil purpose.
Aeris sat, wide-eyed with her dress lifted up by Sephiroth's blade and the guys all giggled and took pictures of her pink undies. It wasn't long before Sephiroth was running for dear life while being hotly pursued by Aeris and her sharp edged Princess Guard in one hand and a giant version of a Piko Hammer in the other. She chased him through the field, towards the 'mysterious' waterfall. The other guys were all laughing their asses off as they watched the scene.
Meanwhile, in the 'mysterious' cave, behind the 'mysterious' waterfall............
Vincent strode slowly across the smooth and crystal-like floor of the strange and 'mysterious' cave that lay behind the waterfall. He made his way to the throne-like crystal that was embedded at the end of the cave, running his cold fingers over the equally cold stone. It still glowed slightly from the last time he was here. He could almost smell the scent of the woman he once loved so dearly.
"Lucrecia........." Vincent murmured in remorse for not being able to save her. He closed his eyes and tried to remember the woman's face he cared for.
"Vincent? Is that you?" A female voice sounded softly behind the melancholy man. Vincent turned around to the face the voice, his eyes widening at whom he saw.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Link: Dum, Dum, Dummmmmmmm!!! Stay tuned for the next—
Author: HEY! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!!!
Link: (scared beyond all reason) um......... I'm just standing here and doing the cheesy announcer voice?
Sephiroth: (whispering to you people out there. Yes, you.) Please excuse her: it's that time of the month for her.
Dante: When Trish and Lucia are at that time of the month, they are worse than Mundus and all his hordes of demons. Female demons are scary! Aeris/Author is just as bad, if not worse. It's like watching the apocalypse, but without the horsemen and the pink flying bunnies.
Legolas: Oh gods.........
Kain: TAKE COVER!!!
Kuja: Um, Aeris/Author, honey? Let's simmer down—
Author: WHEN THE HELL DID I SAY YOU COULD TALK TO ME?!!!!!!
Vincent: ...............
Sephiroth: (now scared as well) Aeris/Author, please try and calm down.
Author: (Evilness) SHUT UP AND GET ME SOMETHING TO EAT!!!!!!! (Ashley, Elisha and Akira Kijo walk in. Immediately switches to cute and happy) Hiya guys!
Ashley, Elisha and Akira Kijo: Hey! What's up?!
Vincent: The storm has gone.........
Sephiroth: No kidding.
Author: NAKED WUFFEIS FALLING FROM THE SKY!
Akira Kijo: YEAH!
Kain: Er, yeahhhhhhhhhhhh......... wtf?
Author: (turns to the audience) Sorry for the delay on updating. I've been busy with all sorts of things. I'm in my school's play, I've got lots of homework, there's a mongoose infestation in my computer, my sister's the embodiment of Satan, I could go on and on, yet I won't. I also had a nasty writer's block demon possessing my mind until a stabbed it out with the sharp edge of an electric toothbrush. The doctor says the wounds might heal in a few months so I'm happy again. Hey, I make this crap up and write it as I go, peoples, so at times I don't know what's ganna happen next. It usually comes to me as dreams. Seriously. What?!!!?! You don't believe me?!?!?! YOU WANNA TAKE THIS OUTSIDE?!?!?!? I KNOW WHERE YOU SLEEP!!!!!!
Sephiroth: Kinky.
Ashley: (devil horns appear while she pulls on Sephiroth's hair) So it's NOT a wig!
Sephiroth: LEGGO!
Legolas: What?!!
Sephiroth: No! I mean LET GO!
Ashley: (sees Kuja and runs to vex him) KUJI!!!
Kuja: OH LORD!!! (Runs away while being followed by Ashley)
Elisha: (hugs Vincent) Wheeee!
Author: Yo, Akira! Thanks for letting me borrow Vampire Hunter D; Bloodlust. I LOVE THAT MOVIEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
Akira Kijo: Sure (smiles so cutely)
Author: Chalk Spot
Akira Kijo: You are soooo dead! Grrr!
Author: Mwahahahah! Well, I'm ganna go sleep, it's almost two in the morning and the Jolt has worn off. Goobye.