~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~
Chapter Fifteen
Author: (rocks a mechanical baby) I updated a bit in the Final Fantasy Shrine section of my website but don't get too giddy, I'm still working on it. In other news this week, my friend is making me baby-sit one of those mechanical babies that you get in those Family life classes in school. IT KEEPS CRYING!!!!!! I'm never ganna finish this chapter in time with only one hand! I have to keep rocking it or it will CRY!!!!! ITS GANNA DRIVE ME INSANE!!!!!!! Pms: the beginning of this chapter, like everything else, contains a butt-load of spoilers.
Legolas: Uh, don't you mean 'ps'? Not 'pms'?
Kain: (grabs the mechanical baby and shakes it crazily. It screams as if it was being killed) What the hell?
Author: (tries to grab it back) DON'T!!! Don't let its head fall back! Oh, man, she's ganna kill me!
Dante: (lights the baby's feet on fire, it wails even more.) Wow! They scream when you burn them! Just like real life!
Kuja: (cringes away from Dante) You burn babies?!?!
Dante: (tries not to look suspicious) Well......... no, I mean, I just don't like kids......... heheh.
Author: You hole! How can you not love children?!
Kain: (licks lips) Oh, I love children......... I just couldn't eat a whole one.
Sephiroth: (walks in) Hey, whad I miss?
Kuja: Well, Dante burns babies and Kain eats them.
Dante: The leprechaun told me to burn things!
Kain: Mmmmm, Kentucky Fried Children.........
Sephiroth: (stares at both of them for a moment, then looks at Aeris/author with a smile when he sees the mechanical baby) Heyyy! So you're practicing? Eh? Eh? (Nudges her suggestively) Who's ganna be the daddy?
Author: (grabs baby, beats them all over the head with it, then rocks it to sleep.) SHUDDUP!
Link, Vincent, Kuja, and Legolas: (rubs the bumps on their head) But we didn't do anything!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I~~~~~~~~~eat~~~~~~~~~~~~babies~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Author: (hits Kain) QUIT SCREWING WITH THE TEXT!~~~~~~~~~
Chapter Fifteen pickles.
"......... Is that you, Vincent?" A soft voice asked, "You've come back to see me again?"
"Lucrecia!" Vincent gasped at the glowing figure of a beautiful woman in a white lab coat, glasses and with long brown hair up in a ponytail. At first he was unable to say anything until he mustard (blah! I mean mustered.) enough courage to step forward to her. "I thought your soul has been lain to rest!"
"I thought so as well. However, I have been unable to keep myself from mourning my son's death......... Oh, Vincent, why did my son have to die?" Lucrecia asked as her translucent eyes shed tears of sadness. Vincent reached to wipe away the ghostly tears with his good hand. She shunned him, turning to face away from him as she went on. "Oh, my poor, poor baby. Oh, Sephiroth........."
"Lucrecia, darling........." Vincent hesitated, yet ventured on when he figured it was all right to tell her. "Your son......... Sephiroth, he's, um......... He's not dea—"
Before Vincent could finish, a clamoring battle rushed into the crystal cave where the two stood. Aeris had chased Sephiroth into the cave, still waving her Piko hammer and Princess Guard after him threateningly. He was halfway laughing at her and screaming for help, until both Aeris and Sephiroth noticed the mysterious glowing ghost lady next to vampire boy. Vincent and Lucrecia were staring wide-eyed at them as well.
"Who's the pretty ghost-like lady, Vincent?" Sephiroth grinned mischievously at the other man, lifting his eyebrow suspiciously.
"......... Er." Vincent stepped away from Lucrecia a bit.
"......... Silver hair?" Lucrecia mumbled to herself in an unsure realization.
"Uh, sorry to intrude." Aeris bowed to them apologetically, Japanese style, before turning to Sephiroth and yanking on his long locks as she went for the cave entrance, dragging him with her. "Let us continue this outside, Sephiroth."
Vincent gave a flat, 'oh crap' kind of chuckle, backing away from the now staring woman next to him a little more. At first Lucrecia stared wide eyed and slack jawed at the man being drug from the cave before she could regain her wits in order to stop them. Finally, she let out a scream mixed with pure joy and shock. Aeris, Sephiroth, and Vincent all looked at her, stunned and uncertain of what would happen next.
"OH, MY BABY!!!!!!!" the transparent woman flew over to the ex-general, arms outstretched to hug him. However, since she was only a spirit, she basically went right through him at the speed she was going. Sephiroth was stunned and confused by the woman and her words. "Oh, My Little Baby Boy!!!"
"Oh, Gawds! It's another alien she-being claiming to be my mother!!!" Sephiroth screamed, jumping behind Aeris as she came back to embrace her him. When he said this, Lucrecia stopped and looked at her grown son. He continued his raving. "KEEP IT AWAY!!!"
Lucrecia looked over at Vincent with rage in her eyes. She flew over to beat the crap out of him but couldn't, for she was a ghost. "You said he died!!! YOU LIED! This is all because you were jealous of his father!"
"......... Sephiroth, she IS your mother!" Vincent told him while he crouched in the fetal position to avoid the wrath of his formal love. She had quite the temper.
"Oh, wow! Sephy, you have a mom." Aeris said in awe, moving away from them.
"..............." Sephiroth was now too overwhelmed with shock and just stood staring at her. Lucrecia staggered towards him with a longing look.
"Sephiroth, my baby boy........." Lucrecia began crying again as she tentatively reached out for his face, touching it gently. "......... I'm so, so sorry. I'm sorry I died, I wish could have been there to watch you grow."
"You, you really are my mother?" Sephiroth asked, and she nodded in reply.
"Yes, I'm so sorry." Lucrecia said, tears now streaming down her ghostly face. "Oh, my son! I died when I gave life to you! I had you because I loved you, but I wasn't there for you! I'm sorry, Sephiroth!"
"Mother. Mother? Mother!" Sephiroth and Lucrecia embraced one another as if they would never separate again. They hugged and hugged until Sephiroth finally pulled back. "There's so much I don't know. But I have one important question to ask."
"Yes?" Lucrecia's eyes lit up eagerly.
"When is my actual birthday?" Sephiroth asked. Vincent and Aeris almost in the room fell over, while Lucrecia smiled up at her son. He continued on. "I know I was born some time in August......... but what's the day?"
"The 14th. You'll be 31 next year?" She said, he nodded. "I take it he has mistreated you, hasn't he?"
"Uh, who?"
"Your father. Hojo." She replied. Sephiroth's eyes widened from being traumatized and appalled at what he heard. Hojo, his father! Blasphemy!
"I don't believe it! I refuse to! That sick son of a bitch, my father?! EW!" Sephiroth said, bashing his head into the cavern wall while gagging.
"Well, actually........." Lucrecia looked over at the solemn man that once cared for her more anything and thought a bit. At last she spoke again. "Actually, I'm not exactly sure who your father is."
"What?!" Sephiroth exclaimed. 'My mom's a whore? OH GAWD! Just great.'
Lucrecia explained to Sephiroth how they discovered Jenova long ago and how she and a group of scientists, including Hojo and Aeris' father: Professor Gast, giddily worked on the Jenova project to find out what it actually was. They thought Jenova was a Cetra, in which Aeris quickly explained that she wasn't and actually was what killed off the Cetra centuries before. Lucrecia went on, telling how she married Hojo, also saying how horrible of a mistake it was. Yet he convinced her that it would work out and even to have a baby with him, which thinking it was purely for love that she agreed, but he actually wanted the baby for scientific purposes. Pausing from her account, Lucrecia turned over to Vincent and admitted that she was having an affair with him, he being a Turk at the time and working with keeping the whole project a secret, and that she was unsure whose baby because Hojo was beginning to worry her with his obsession with his work. Vincent turned red with embarrassment when she went on about how Vincent comforted when she and Hojo got in fights and Sephiroth was growing more and more easy with it all. Lucrecia had to stop and apologize to Vincent for being so naïve and believing Hojo would change and grow more involved in the relationship once Sephiroth was born. She had chosen Hojo over Vincent and neglected his love for her. Further more, Lucrecia agreed to allow Hojo experiment on her unborn child, trying to get their relationship to work, also having her own scientific curiosity about the whole project. Thus, the injections of Jenova cells into the womb began. Lucrecia began to grow sickly while nearing the end of her pregnancy, deciding to name her soon-to-be-born boy Sephiroth after the ultrasound results. Seconds after the birth, which she went into detail, she called out for her son with her last and dying breaths only to be denied and left to die while her son is taken off to the lab for more experimenting. It was then that she broke out into a sobbing fit, apologizing even more as she cried into her hands.
".................." Sephiroth didn't speak, he only looked down at his mother that cried before him.
"What did they put you through?" She asked quietly after regaining control of her emotions. Sephiroth summed up his life within five minutes. He stopped and turned to look at Aeris, who was now crying too.
"Oh, Sephiroth! Sniff! I never knew!" Aeris blew her nose into the handkerchief Vincent handed her before approaching him with open arms. "You poor thing! You need a hug."
"Um, Aeris? I don't think this is a good time for –"Sephiroth started, rubbing the back of his neck as she came up to him. She looked up into his eyes with tear stained cheeks and red eyes that illuminated her green orbs that floated within them, holding up her arms expectantly.
"Come. Come on. Huggles." Aeris' voice faulting, trying to crack a warm smile through her tears. Sephiroth looked at her still captivated, finally glancing over to his mother and Vincent for a quick second. They were watching with great interest. Lucrecia scrutinized the event with a soft gaze. Sephiroth looked back at Aeris, slowly excepting her offer. Aeris hugged him tightly as he stroked her hair softly.
"Awwwwwwww." Vincent was now dabbing his own eyes with his handkerchief. Sephiroth gave him a death glance that stopped any more oncoming comments from the peanut gallery. Lucrecia walked up to Sephiroth when they finally parted, waving for Vincent to join the group. When Vincent came over from his little corner shyly, Lucrecia turned her attention back to the grasping pair.
"Sephiroth, since I cannot be with you once you leave this cave, try an think of Vincent as your father. Since I'm not sure if he actually is, I am quite sure it's perfectly okay." Lucrecia chortled. Vincent's face lightened considerably.
"......... I......... have a son. I......... Have a son!" Vincent mumbled with joy, eyes tearing and anime-like. He turned to Sephiroth with his glassy red eyes for several seconds before springing past Aeris and towards him, locking him in a bear hug. "OH MY SON!!!!!! We can do all those father-son things together! I can teach you how to play baseball and football and we can go fishing and –"
"Um, Vinny, honey? Let's save that for later, okay?" Lucrecia patted him on the back, queuing him to loosen up a little on Sephiroth, who was turning purple due to the lack of air from under Vincent's claw. Aeris let out another sob of happiness, walking away from them to give the guys some space. Lucrecia followed quietly while Vincent went back to hugging the speechless Sephiroth. She peered at the girl in curiosity. "Hello? Are you close with Sephiroth?"
"Well, remember how he said he killed a girl while she was praying and under the influence of Jenova? Well, I was that girl. My name is Aeris. But we're all over that now! We're just friends." Aeris smiled prettily. She wiped away the tears and looked at the ghostly woman who nodded in understandment. "Vincent really is Sephiroth's dad?"
"Well, this is just between you and I, but there is only a fourteen point eight percent chance of that actually being true. Yet it is better for them to think of each other as father and son. Please keep that a secret." Aeris blinked at the woman scientist for how anal she was with her calculations but nodded anyways in agreement. Lucrecia turned to the two men with a solemn smile. "Now that I am at ease with my mind, I must leave this plane of existence an move on. Vincent, may you be the father Sephiroth never had. Be a counselor for him when he is in need."
"Um, mom, I'm a big boy now—"Sephiroth began.
"A big boy that almost caused this planet to cease to exist!" Lucrecia reprimanded as she grabbed his ear and tugged.
"Ow, Ow, Ow, Ow, Ow," Sephiroth muttered.
"Now. I permit you to marry this young lady, son. She seems like a nice and caring young woman. Treat her with respect and kindness." Lucrecia said placing Aeris and Sephiroth's hands together. They both stared at her in disbelief, faces crimson with embarrassment. "I need someone to take care of my little baby."
"uh, mom?!?!?!" Sephiroth started.
"Excuse me?!?!?" Aeris went over the ghostly woman, trying very hard to keep her cool. "But I am not ganna change his diapers for the rest of my life!"
"I didn't say you had to, sweetie. I just need someone to whip him into shape every now and then." Lucrecia gave her best little smile. However, the woman began to fade, waving to them all. "I'm sorry I can't stay any longer. I love you, Sephy-poo! Mind your father for me! Aeris, sweetie, take care of him for me too! Please take care of them both, Vinny, and keep him in line! PEACE AND LOVE! Sayonara!"
Everyone just stared when the woman vanished with a flash of light. Sephiroth poked at the air at where his mother once stood. Aeris was still wide eyed at what the woman said. Vincent smiled, turning to Sephiroth.
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Sephiroth........." Vincent's smile got even more evil. "My son."
"Uh oh." Sephiroth muttered. He tried to tip toe out of the cave. Yet, Vincent caught a hold of his collar. "crap."
"Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, now that I'm a father, I get fatherly privileges. Don't I?" Vincent purred. "Well, what should punish I you for?"
"Be merciful!" Sephiroth cringed.
"I should punish you for............... TRYING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!" Vincent announced, pulling a confused Sephiroth over his knee and paddling his bottom with his claw. Aeris who had been walking around, stopped and stared at them wide-eyed. She began to laugh hysterically after a few moments.
"Um, Vincent?" Sephiroth began to ask while being more than disturbed when Vincent ceased the spankings. Vincent glared at him and pulled him down again, spanking him some more. "Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow."
"You shall address me as one of the following! Dad, daddy, father, sir, or um, yeah, father." Vincent disciplined him, letting him go when he was finished again. Aeris couldn't stop from laughing.
"Whatever." Sephiroth shrugged it off, quite embarrassed now. (sounds like a certain FF8 character)
"How humiliating." Aeris said, watching from behind, trying not to laugh too hard.
"Can we go now?" Sephiroth whined.
"NO WHINING!" Vincent popped him in the mouth.
"Urge to kill......... rising." Sephiroth grumbled under his breath as they headed out of the cave.
They made their way back to the Highwind that was still parked in the field. Then they had a picnic. With pringles. I like pringles. Okay, no, they didn't have a picnic. That was the mongoose King and the Goughnour, who now live happy as gumdrop tears. Anywho. Aeris, Sephiroth, and a now fatherly Vincent made their way up to the group of men/elves/sorcerers/half- demons. Aeris gave them all a warm smile.
"Is the Highwind fixed?" She asked cheerfully.
"Yeah, I'd like to get the hell out of here." Sephiroth said. Before he knew it, he was on Vincent's knee, being spanked. "OW, OW, OW, OW!!!!!"
"NO SON OF MINE IS GOING TO BE CUSSING!!" Vincent roared, letting go of him when he was finished. At first, everyone stared at them in disbelief. Then, all at once, everyone callapsed to the ground, rolling insanely with laughter. Save for Aeris, who already had her share of laughs in the cave. She only chuckled now.
"DAD! I'M NOT A CHILD!!!! YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THE SPANKING PROCEDURE EVERY TIME I DO SOMETHING WRONG!!!!!! IT JUST ISN'T RIGHT!!!! I'M A GROWN MAN DAMMIT!!!!! IT'S ALMOST GAY TO BE DOING THAT!!!!" Sephiroth yelled at him, throwing his arms up into the air. He turned to see the expression on his face after a few moments. His red cape collar, bandanna and his mass of black hair mostly obscured Vincent's face like always. Yet he could see his eyes. Vincent's eyes sparkled with laughter.
"I know, but it's just so much fun being a dad. I never thought it would be this thrilling." Vincent said casually, before he walked off to the Highwind's entrance. Cid was still recovering from all the laughter when he stood up.
"The (%$*ing Highwind, hahahahaha! Is fixed! Don't *#@*$& it up!" Cid said. He then broke out into laughter again and ran after Vincent to ask about the whole 'fatherly' thing.
"Um, well, then......... Let's get back on the ship!" Aeris said.
"Yay!" Everyone then climbed into the Highwind, waiting for an explanation for the whole father thing as well. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Author: Ha! I finally completed that chapter.
Dante: TOOK YOU F*$#*&^ING LONG ENOUGH!
Kain: YEAH, AND WE WEREN'T EVEN IN IT MUCH!!!
Link: YEAH, WTF IS UP W/ THAT?!?!
Kain: (turns to Link) Shut up, pansy
Link: .........
Kuja: Are we not loved?!?!
Author: Speaking of love............... Sigh.
Ashley: (walks in) What sup?
Sephiroth: Aeris/author?
Vincent: She looks to be in a state of hypnosis
Legolas: She looks to be.........
All: What? Be What?!!?
Legolas: In love!
Vincent: Love is a cruel mistress.........
Kain: Love?!?! What the hell?!?!
Link: Oh, like those fairy tales and stuff.
Sephiroth: evilllllllll.........
Kuja: Awwwwwwwwww, this is so happy!
Ashley: (looks at Kuja) Hellooooo. (kidnaps him and transforms him into a coconut)
Kuja: !!!!!! (rolls away)
Ashley: WHEEEEEEEE!!! (chases the coconut with moogles)
Sephiroth: So she loves someone?
Legolas: seems to be so.
Vincent: Love is like racing across the frozen tundra on a snowmobile, which flips over, trapping you underneath. Then, at night, the ice-weasels come.
All: (briefly stare at Vincent).........
Dante: Well whoever the guy is, he can't be any hotter than me
Kain: No, I'm hotter
Sephiroth: what the hell are you talking about, I have hordes of fan club chicks that would love to get in MY pants!
Legolas: Fools! I am the most beautifullest of all! So, like, um, HA!
Vincent: Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature machine gun.
All: (staring again.).........
Kain: man, you have issues.
Legolas: I don't have a miniature machine gun.
Ashley: (chases rolling coconut Kuja while the moogles follow in the background) Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Author: ......... Sigh!
Link: Who's the guy?!
Sephiroth: TELL US! (Whispers) so I can get him out of my way. MWHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!
Kain: Is he another Vampire?
Vincent: Love is like a—
All: SHUTTUP!!!
Vincent:............
Legolas: or another elf? He couldn't possibly be more beautiful than me.
Dante: or another demon? Or half-demon? Or semi-demon? Or possessed by a demon? Or –
Kain: (knocks Dante out with his soul reaver) You shut up too!
Link: is he a sorcerer like Kuja? (everyone shudders. Kuja coconut rolls on by)
Author: He's just a............
All: A WHAT?!?!?!
Author: A...............A Senior at my high school. @.@ Sigh.......
All: (fall to the floor)
Sephiroth: well, this chapter sucked. Stay tuned next time, if there is a next time. Aeris/author won't stop thinking about that 'human'! (goes over and slaps Aeris/author several times. She still stares out into the abyss, sighing) See! I wonder what she'd do if I got naked?
Author: NAKED?! WHERE?!?!
Vincent: Love is a –
Kain: (knocks him out as well) we demand 15 more reviews or I kill something. Well, I'm ganna do that anyway, whether you review or not. (Goes out and kills more hobos)
Chapter Fifteen
Author: (rocks a mechanical baby) I updated a bit in the Final Fantasy Shrine section of my website but don't get too giddy, I'm still working on it. In other news this week, my friend is making me baby-sit one of those mechanical babies that you get in those Family life classes in school. IT KEEPS CRYING!!!!!! I'm never ganna finish this chapter in time with only one hand! I have to keep rocking it or it will CRY!!!!! ITS GANNA DRIVE ME INSANE!!!!!!! Pms: the beginning of this chapter, like everything else, contains a butt-load of spoilers.
Legolas: Uh, don't you mean 'ps'? Not 'pms'?
Kain: (grabs the mechanical baby and shakes it crazily. It screams as if it was being killed) What the hell?
Author: (tries to grab it back) DON'T!!! Don't let its head fall back! Oh, man, she's ganna kill me!
Dante: (lights the baby's feet on fire, it wails even more.) Wow! They scream when you burn them! Just like real life!
Kuja: (cringes away from Dante) You burn babies?!?!
Dante: (tries not to look suspicious) Well......... no, I mean, I just don't like kids......... heheh.
Author: You hole! How can you not love children?!
Kain: (licks lips) Oh, I love children......... I just couldn't eat a whole one.
Sephiroth: (walks in) Hey, whad I miss?
Kuja: Well, Dante burns babies and Kain eats them.
Dante: The leprechaun told me to burn things!
Kain: Mmmmm, Kentucky Fried Children.........
Sephiroth: (stares at both of them for a moment, then looks at Aeris/author with a smile when he sees the mechanical baby) Heyyy! So you're practicing? Eh? Eh? (Nudges her suggestively) Who's ganna be the daddy?
Author: (grabs baby, beats them all over the head with it, then rocks it to sleep.) SHUDDUP!
Link, Vincent, Kuja, and Legolas: (rubs the bumps on their head) But we didn't do anything!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I~~~~~~~~~eat~~~~~~~~~~~~babies~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Author: (hits Kain) QUIT SCREWING WITH THE TEXT!~~~~~~~~~
Chapter Fifteen pickles.
"......... Is that you, Vincent?" A soft voice asked, "You've come back to see me again?"
"Lucrecia!" Vincent gasped at the glowing figure of a beautiful woman in a white lab coat, glasses and with long brown hair up in a ponytail. At first he was unable to say anything until he mustard (blah! I mean mustered.) enough courage to step forward to her. "I thought your soul has been lain to rest!"
"I thought so as well. However, I have been unable to keep myself from mourning my son's death......... Oh, Vincent, why did my son have to die?" Lucrecia asked as her translucent eyes shed tears of sadness. Vincent reached to wipe away the ghostly tears with his good hand. She shunned him, turning to face away from him as she went on. "Oh, my poor, poor baby. Oh, Sephiroth........."
"Lucrecia, darling........." Vincent hesitated, yet ventured on when he figured it was all right to tell her. "Your son......... Sephiroth, he's, um......... He's not dea—"
Before Vincent could finish, a clamoring battle rushed into the crystal cave where the two stood. Aeris had chased Sephiroth into the cave, still waving her Piko hammer and Princess Guard after him threateningly. He was halfway laughing at her and screaming for help, until both Aeris and Sephiroth noticed the mysterious glowing ghost lady next to vampire boy. Vincent and Lucrecia were staring wide-eyed at them as well.
"Who's the pretty ghost-like lady, Vincent?" Sephiroth grinned mischievously at the other man, lifting his eyebrow suspiciously.
"......... Er." Vincent stepped away from Lucrecia a bit.
"......... Silver hair?" Lucrecia mumbled to herself in an unsure realization.
"Uh, sorry to intrude." Aeris bowed to them apologetically, Japanese style, before turning to Sephiroth and yanking on his long locks as she went for the cave entrance, dragging him with her. "Let us continue this outside, Sephiroth."
Vincent gave a flat, 'oh crap' kind of chuckle, backing away from the now staring woman next to him a little more. At first Lucrecia stared wide eyed and slack jawed at the man being drug from the cave before she could regain her wits in order to stop them. Finally, she let out a scream mixed with pure joy and shock. Aeris, Sephiroth, and Vincent all looked at her, stunned and uncertain of what would happen next.
"OH, MY BABY!!!!!!!" the transparent woman flew over to the ex-general, arms outstretched to hug him. However, since she was only a spirit, she basically went right through him at the speed she was going. Sephiroth was stunned and confused by the woman and her words. "Oh, My Little Baby Boy!!!"
"Oh, Gawds! It's another alien she-being claiming to be my mother!!!" Sephiroth screamed, jumping behind Aeris as she came back to embrace her him. When he said this, Lucrecia stopped and looked at her grown son. He continued his raving. "KEEP IT AWAY!!!"
Lucrecia looked over at Vincent with rage in her eyes. She flew over to beat the crap out of him but couldn't, for she was a ghost. "You said he died!!! YOU LIED! This is all because you were jealous of his father!"
"......... Sephiroth, she IS your mother!" Vincent told him while he crouched in the fetal position to avoid the wrath of his formal love. She had quite the temper.
"Oh, wow! Sephy, you have a mom." Aeris said in awe, moving away from them.
"..............." Sephiroth was now too overwhelmed with shock and just stood staring at her. Lucrecia staggered towards him with a longing look.
"Sephiroth, my baby boy........." Lucrecia began crying again as she tentatively reached out for his face, touching it gently. "......... I'm so, so sorry. I'm sorry I died, I wish could have been there to watch you grow."
"You, you really are my mother?" Sephiroth asked, and she nodded in reply.
"Yes, I'm so sorry." Lucrecia said, tears now streaming down her ghostly face. "Oh, my son! I died when I gave life to you! I had you because I loved you, but I wasn't there for you! I'm sorry, Sephiroth!"
"Mother. Mother? Mother!" Sephiroth and Lucrecia embraced one another as if they would never separate again. They hugged and hugged until Sephiroth finally pulled back. "There's so much I don't know. But I have one important question to ask."
"Yes?" Lucrecia's eyes lit up eagerly.
"When is my actual birthday?" Sephiroth asked. Vincent and Aeris almost in the room fell over, while Lucrecia smiled up at her son. He continued on. "I know I was born some time in August......... but what's the day?"
"The 14th. You'll be 31 next year?" She said, he nodded. "I take it he has mistreated you, hasn't he?"
"Uh, who?"
"Your father. Hojo." She replied. Sephiroth's eyes widened from being traumatized and appalled at what he heard. Hojo, his father! Blasphemy!
"I don't believe it! I refuse to! That sick son of a bitch, my father?! EW!" Sephiroth said, bashing his head into the cavern wall while gagging.
"Well, actually........." Lucrecia looked over at the solemn man that once cared for her more anything and thought a bit. At last she spoke again. "Actually, I'm not exactly sure who your father is."
"What?!" Sephiroth exclaimed. 'My mom's a whore? OH GAWD! Just great.'
Lucrecia explained to Sephiroth how they discovered Jenova long ago and how she and a group of scientists, including Hojo and Aeris' father: Professor Gast, giddily worked on the Jenova project to find out what it actually was. They thought Jenova was a Cetra, in which Aeris quickly explained that she wasn't and actually was what killed off the Cetra centuries before. Lucrecia went on, telling how she married Hojo, also saying how horrible of a mistake it was. Yet he convinced her that it would work out and even to have a baby with him, which thinking it was purely for love that she agreed, but he actually wanted the baby for scientific purposes. Pausing from her account, Lucrecia turned over to Vincent and admitted that she was having an affair with him, he being a Turk at the time and working with keeping the whole project a secret, and that she was unsure whose baby because Hojo was beginning to worry her with his obsession with his work. Vincent turned red with embarrassment when she went on about how Vincent comforted when she and Hojo got in fights and Sephiroth was growing more and more easy with it all. Lucrecia had to stop and apologize to Vincent for being so naïve and believing Hojo would change and grow more involved in the relationship once Sephiroth was born. She had chosen Hojo over Vincent and neglected his love for her. Further more, Lucrecia agreed to allow Hojo experiment on her unborn child, trying to get their relationship to work, also having her own scientific curiosity about the whole project. Thus, the injections of Jenova cells into the womb began. Lucrecia began to grow sickly while nearing the end of her pregnancy, deciding to name her soon-to-be-born boy Sephiroth after the ultrasound results. Seconds after the birth, which she went into detail, she called out for her son with her last and dying breaths only to be denied and left to die while her son is taken off to the lab for more experimenting. It was then that she broke out into a sobbing fit, apologizing even more as she cried into her hands.
".................." Sephiroth didn't speak, he only looked down at his mother that cried before him.
"What did they put you through?" She asked quietly after regaining control of her emotions. Sephiroth summed up his life within five minutes. He stopped and turned to look at Aeris, who was now crying too.
"Oh, Sephiroth! Sniff! I never knew!" Aeris blew her nose into the handkerchief Vincent handed her before approaching him with open arms. "You poor thing! You need a hug."
"Um, Aeris? I don't think this is a good time for –"Sephiroth started, rubbing the back of his neck as she came up to him. She looked up into his eyes with tear stained cheeks and red eyes that illuminated her green orbs that floated within them, holding up her arms expectantly.
"Come. Come on. Huggles." Aeris' voice faulting, trying to crack a warm smile through her tears. Sephiroth looked at her still captivated, finally glancing over to his mother and Vincent for a quick second. They were watching with great interest. Lucrecia scrutinized the event with a soft gaze. Sephiroth looked back at Aeris, slowly excepting her offer. Aeris hugged him tightly as he stroked her hair softly.
"Awwwwwwww." Vincent was now dabbing his own eyes with his handkerchief. Sephiroth gave him a death glance that stopped any more oncoming comments from the peanut gallery. Lucrecia walked up to Sephiroth when they finally parted, waving for Vincent to join the group. When Vincent came over from his little corner shyly, Lucrecia turned her attention back to the grasping pair.
"Sephiroth, since I cannot be with you once you leave this cave, try an think of Vincent as your father. Since I'm not sure if he actually is, I am quite sure it's perfectly okay." Lucrecia chortled. Vincent's face lightened considerably.
"......... I......... have a son. I......... Have a son!" Vincent mumbled with joy, eyes tearing and anime-like. He turned to Sephiroth with his glassy red eyes for several seconds before springing past Aeris and towards him, locking him in a bear hug. "OH MY SON!!!!!! We can do all those father-son things together! I can teach you how to play baseball and football and we can go fishing and –"
"Um, Vinny, honey? Let's save that for later, okay?" Lucrecia patted him on the back, queuing him to loosen up a little on Sephiroth, who was turning purple due to the lack of air from under Vincent's claw. Aeris let out another sob of happiness, walking away from them to give the guys some space. Lucrecia followed quietly while Vincent went back to hugging the speechless Sephiroth. She peered at the girl in curiosity. "Hello? Are you close with Sephiroth?"
"Well, remember how he said he killed a girl while she was praying and under the influence of Jenova? Well, I was that girl. My name is Aeris. But we're all over that now! We're just friends." Aeris smiled prettily. She wiped away the tears and looked at the ghostly woman who nodded in understandment. "Vincent really is Sephiroth's dad?"
"Well, this is just between you and I, but there is only a fourteen point eight percent chance of that actually being true. Yet it is better for them to think of each other as father and son. Please keep that a secret." Aeris blinked at the woman scientist for how anal she was with her calculations but nodded anyways in agreement. Lucrecia turned to the two men with a solemn smile. "Now that I am at ease with my mind, I must leave this plane of existence an move on. Vincent, may you be the father Sephiroth never had. Be a counselor for him when he is in need."
"Um, mom, I'm a big boy now—"Sephiroth began.
"A big boy that almost caused this planet to cease to exist!" Lucrecia reprimanded as she grabbed his ear and tugged.
"Ow, Ow, Ow, Ow, Ow," Sephiroth muttered.
"Now. I permit you to marry this young lady, son. She seems like a nice and caring young woman. Treat her with respect and kindness." Lucrecia said placing Aeris and Sephiroth's hands together. They both stared at her in disbelief, faces crimson with embarrassment. "I need someone to take care of my little baby."
"uh, mom?!?!?!" Sephiroth started.
"Excuse me?!?!?" Aeris went over the ghostly woman, trying very hard to keep her cool. "But I am not ganna change his diapers for the rest of my life!"
"I didn't say you had to, sweetie. I just need someone to whip him into shape every now and then." Lucrecia gave her best little smile. However, the woman began to fade, waving to them all. "I'm sorry I can't stay any longer. I love you, Sephy-poo! Mind your father for me! Aeris, sweetie, take care of him for me too! Please take care of them both, Vinny, and keep him in line! PEACE AND LOVE! Sayonara!"
Everyone just stared when the woman vanished with a flash of light. Sephiroth poked at the air at where his mother once stood. Aeris was still wide eyed at what the woman said. Vincent smiled, turning to Sephiroth.
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Sephiroth........." Vincent's smile got even more evil. "My son."
"Uh oh." Sephiroth muttered. He tried to tip toe out of the cave. Yet, Vincent caught a hold of his collar. "crap."
"Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, now that I'm a father, I get fatherly privileges. Don't I?" Vincent purred. "Well, what should punish I you for?"
"Be merciful!" Sephiroth cringed.
"I should punish you for............... TRYING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!" Vincent announced, pulling a confused Sephiroth over his knee and paddling his bottom with his claw. Aeris who had been walking around, stopped and stared at them wide-eyed. She began to laugh hysterically after a few moments.
"Um, Vincent?" Sephiroth began to ask while being more than disturbed when Vincent ceased the spankings. Vincent glared at him and pulled him down again, spanking him some more. "Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow."
"You shall address me as one of the following! Dad, daddy, father, sir, or um, yeah, father." Vincent disciplined him, letting him go when he was finished again. Aeris couldn't stop from laughing.
"Whatever." Sephiroth shrugged it off, quite embarrassed now. (sounds like a certain FF8 character)
"How humiliating." Aeris said, watching from behind, trying not to laugh too hard.
"Can we go now?" Sephiroth whined.
"NO WHINING!" Vincent popped him in the mouth.
"Urge to kill......... rising." Sephiroth grumbled under his breath as they headed out of the cave.
They made their way back to the Highwind that was still parked in the field. Then they had a picnic. With pringles. I like pringles. Okay, no, they didn't have a picnic. That was the mongoose King and the Goughnour, who now live happy as gumdrop tears. Anywho. Aeris, Sephiroth, and a now fatherly Vincent made their way up to the group of men/elves/sorcerers/half- demons. Aeris gave them all a warm smile.
"Is the Highwind fixed?" She asked cheerfully.
"Yeah, I'd like to get the hell out of here." Sephiroth said. Before he knew it, he was on Vincent's knee, being spanked. "OW, OW, OW, OW!!!!!"
"NO SON OF MINE IS GOING TO BE CUSSING!!" Vincent roared, letting go of him when he was finished. At first, everyone stared at them in disbelief. Then, all at once, everyone callapsed to the ground, rolling insanely with laughter. Save for Aeris, who already had her share of laughs in the cave. She only chuckled now.
"DAD! I'M NOT A CHILD!!!! YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THE SPANKING PROCEDURE EVERY TIME I DO SOMETHING WRONG!!!!!! IT JUST ISN'T RIGHT!!!! I'M A GROWN MAN DAMMIT!!!!! IT'S ALMOST GAY TO BE DOING THAT!!!!" Sephiroth yelled at him, throwing his arms up into the air. He turned to see the expression on his face after a few moments. His red cape collar, bandanna and his mass of black hair mostly obscured Vincent's face like always. Yet he could see his eyes. Vincent's eyes sparkled with laughter.
"I know, but it's just so much fun being a dad. I never thought it would be this thrilling." Vincent said casually, before he walked off to the Highwind's entrance. Cid was still recovering from all the laughter when he stood up.
"The (%$*ing Highwind, hahahahaha! Is fixed! Don't *#@*$& it up!" Cid said. He then broke out into laughter again and ran after Vincent to ask about the whole 'fatherly' thing.
"Um, well, then......... Let's get back on the ship!" Aeris said.
"Yay!" Everyone then climbed into the Highwind, waiting for an explanation for the whole father thing as well. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Author: Ha! I finally completed that chapter.
Dante: TOOK YOU F*$#*&^ING LONG ENOUGH!
Kain: YEAH, AND WE WEREN'T EVEN IN IT MUCH!!!
Link: YEAH, WTF IS UP W/ THAT?!?!
Kain: (turns to Link) Shut up, pansy
Link: .........
Kuja: Are we not loved?!?!
Author: Speaking of love............... Sigh.
Ashley: (walks in) What sup?
Sephiroth: Aeris/author?
Vincent: She looks to be in a state of hypnosis
Legolas: She looks to be.........
All: What? Be What?!!?
Legolas: In love!
Vincent: Love is a cruel mistress.........
Kain: Love?!?! What the hell?!?!
Link: Oh, like those fairy tales and stuff.
Sephiroth: evilllllllll.........
Kuja: Awwwwwwwwww, this is so happy!
Ashley: (looks at Kuja) Hellooooo. (kidnaps him and transforms him into a coconut)
Kuja: !!!!!! (rolls away)
Ashley: WHEEEEEEEE!!! (chases the coconut with moogles)
Sephiroth: So she loves someone?
Legolas: seems to be so.
Vincent: Love is like racing across the frozen tundra on a snowmobile, which flips over, trapping you underneath. Then, at night, the ice-weasels come.
All: (briefly stare at Vincent).........
Dante: Well whoever the guy is, he can't be any hotter than me
Kain: No, I'm hotter
Sephiroth: what the hell are you talking about, I have hordes of fan club chicks that would love to get in MY pants!
Legolas: Fools! I am the most beautifullest of all! So, like, um, HA!
Vincent: Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature machine gun.
All: (staring again.).........
Kain: man, you have issues.
Legolas: I don't have a miniature machine gun.
Ashley: (chases rolling coconut Kuja while the moogles follow in the background) Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Author: ......... Sigh!
Link: Who's the guy?!
Sephiroth: TELL US! (Whispers) so I can get him out of my way. MWHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!
Kain: Is he another Vampire?
Vincent: Love is like a—
All: SHUTTUP!!!
Vincent:............
Legolas: or another elf? He couldn't possibly be more beautiful than me.
Dante: or another demon? Or half-demon? Or semi-demon? Or possessed by a demon? Or –
Kain: (knocks Dante out with his soul reaver) You shut up too!
Link: is he a sorcerer like Kuja? (everyone shudders. Kuja coconut rolls on by)
Author: He's just a............
All: A WHAT?!?!?!
Author: A...............A Senior at my high school. @.@ Sigh.......
All: (fall to the floor)
Sephiroth: well, this chapter sucked. Stay tuned next time, if there is a next time. Aeris/author won't stop thinking about that 'human'! (goes over and slaps Aeris/author several times. She still stares out into the abyss, sighing) See! I wonder what she'd do if I got naked?
Author: NAKED?! WHERE?!?!
Vincent: Love is a –
Kain: (knocks him out as well) we demand 15 more reviews or I kill something. Well, I'm ganna do that anyway, whether you review or not. (Goes out and kills more hobos)