8 – Katana

"I thought we could go out for dinner, just the two of us."

It's amazing how words sound when you've waited so long to hear them. I wanted to relish them, enjoy them, live in the moment but I couldn't.

It's not that I wasn't happy. Over the past five years, things have changed. Well, Lee was always going to be Lee, the little brother I never had. We laugh and go out together occasionally but it's never been going to go beyond that.

But Neji… Neji was different. Ever since my father died and he helped pulled me out of my rut, he's been changing. In the beginning it was just bits of conversation here and there, little facts I never knew about him that he finally decided to talk about.

He loves birds. One year, Lee and I chipped in to get him a pet parakeet in a cage. He seemed to think it was a nice enough gift but the next day, he let the bird fly free. I apologized for getting him a gift he didn't like. He responded with saying it should go wherever it wanted. I think it's still in the trees outside his window because every so often I hear a bird singing there. And that chirp always makes him smile.

He takes time each day to mediate. I tried it once with him but I just ended up falling asleep in the temple. He had to carry me back home because I wouldn't wake up. I told him I was just in that deep a trance but he just shook his head and told me I was a horrible liar.

He misses his father sometimes. I visit my dad's grave regularly just to say hi but Neji doesn't have one to go to. I told him that he can just relay message to his father through mine. He said he didn't believe me but he still joined me occasionally. He started bringing rice cakes which my dad was never really fond of. I asked Hinata about it and she said that she remembers Hizaishi always eating them.

There were other things too. Last year, we took Lee out to celebrate his birthday. There was a strict no alcohol rule, for obvious reasons. Some guy sent over a drink for me while we were there and when I didn't drink it, he took it as an insult. I mean it's not the first time I heard a string of insults thrown in my direction so I didn't really care.

Neji and Lee took a bit more offense to it. Lee started to lecture the guy on why it wasn't a nice thing to say while Neji just broke the guy's nose. No warning or anything. Just a punch and the guy was knocked out, sprawled on the floor. His friends just dragged him out there and Neji sat back down like nothing happened.

Of course since that day, not a single guy in a Konoha bar dared hit on me but at the same time, I didn't mind it at all. Because by then, I was starting to realize that I didn't see Neji like I saw Lee, just as a friend and a comrade. He was becoming something more.

But if you expected tomes of love poetry and a lot of general sappiness from me, you are way off. Face it, this was Hyuuga Neji. He didn't operate under the normal set of laws that guide most boys. He still believed in fate and I wasn't going to be bold enough to assume that it included me.

So I waited because I was good at that. Hey, try hanging out with Lee on a daily basis and you learn patience pretty quickly. I figured I wasn't going anywhere so there was no real rush. I could just wait for Neji to make up his mind.

At least that's what I told myself. But after two years, I started to think that maybe I was right about not being part of the grand scheme of his destiny. I talked to Lee about it because there was no one else I could trust. I was getting closer to the other kunoichi from the year before me but at same time, secrets never stayed secrets for long in that clique.

I brought him to a nice, secluded teashop to talk to him. We talked about a few things at first, how training was going, how Sakura was still not interested in him, the same old, same old really. And then, somewhere in between dango orders, I blurted it out because I couldn't take holding it in anymore.

"I think I'm in love with Neji."

His response was something along the lines of the following.

"Wait… you… Neji…"

After I broke his brain, I figured Lee might not have been the right person to talk too. But he managed to pull himself together enough to offer one piece of stellar advice.

"It's just… well… Neji is… kind of… dense."

Of all the ways to describe the prodigy of our class, Lee's had never occurred to me. There had been incidents though. Like Ino's story of how he blatantly ignored her during the first Chuunin exam. Hinata said he had never brought a girl home or showed remote interest in anyone her father had introduced to him.

Maybe Lee was right. Maybe Neji was just a bit… dense. So maybe it would take some maneuvering on my part. Which is when I decide to do the stupidest thing I've ever done in my life… I asked the other girls for help.

They mean well, I know that. But after a week suffering under their 'ideas' of how to attract a man… well, we'll just say I'd rather face every member of Akatsuki at once then attempt to live through that again.

First were the attempts to make Neji jealous. Apparently this involved going out with other guys to see if he would notice. Unfortunately since the incident in the bar, the pickings were slim… meaning we only had a few teammates to choose from.

I should have bailed right then. The moment names like Naruto and Kiba and the word date get brought together, anyone in their right mind would have run for Suna. But they promised it would be group dates first so I managed to convince myself that there wasn't any real harm in it.

It was actually kind of fun. I spent most of the time arm wrestling Kiba and beating him at it, which he didn't take too well to. Naruto just joked around the entire time and I couldn't help but join in. The boy is such an endless supply of energy that I realized right away I wasn't his type. He obviously needed someone quieter to counter his hyper personality.

After that little display, the girls decided that dating was not an option until I learned how to act a bit more like a lady. I thought I was just fine in that department, having been trained in female subjects at the academy.

Hinata tried to show me how to pour tea. Sakura spent some time on clothes and how to be cute. And then Ino spent a good few hours explaining the ins and outs of proper hair and skin care. She went through color coordination and make up techniques until I couldn't take anymore. At least Sakura and Hinata looked lost after a while as well.

All in all, it was a colossal failure. I thanked them for their time and just went home because a week of their attempts had left me completely drained. I spent the night alone in my house wondering exactly what I was supposed to do next.

Somehow, I ended up translating those thoughts in a letter to my mother. I didn't think she would really read all twelve pages of it or send any real response. It was mostly teenage girl angst, the stuff usually regulated to beaten up notebooks that were buried in the backs of closest for no one else to see. I told her about Neji, how he wanted to be ANBU like me, how he was a prodigy and so good at everything. I related all the things I had tried, mentioning everything from Lee's initial reactions to the girls' valiant efforts to change me. Then I sealed it and sent it away to her.

I went back to my normal routine for a few weeks, trying to ignore the way Ino chased after me with hair clips that matched my clothes. I trained, I went on missions with my teammates and everything seemed fine. I had almost forgotten about things when the package arrived.

It was an elaborate box hand delivered to me at my door step. It came with a long letter written by my mother who had apparently read every word I had written. Her reply wasn't as long as mine but I think it contained a more meaningful message them my jumbled mess of emotions had.

She told me a bit about how she and my father met. It was funny to read it from her perspective. How he stumbled through introductions and took several months to get the courage to ask her out. She described the first few dates, making sure to point out all the humorous things he had done.

And then she went into how it had ended. Her sadness was easy to see as she wrote of the weeks of arguments they had. How she wanted to bring him into her world while he continued to believe he could never be good enough for her family.

"In the end," she wrote, "it was that belief that was the final blow. Your father could not see us as equals in my world and I could not live outside it.

"The secret I learned in looking back at that is not to be just man and woman, rich and poor. It is to be equals, partners in everything."

And it made sense. No matter how much I tried to change things, I was never going to be anything other then me. And if that wasn't enough then… then that was my fate.

But the letter wasn't the only thing she sent me. Inside the box was a beautiful crafted katana with a small note attached to it.

"I hear ANBU rely on this as a primary weapon. It would be best to start training with it."

I smiled. Yeah… training.

The next ANBU exam was six months away. I got together with Lee and Neji and told them that should be our next goal. We had the mission experience and we just needed a few more rounds of training to get up to par for it.

Lee took to the idea immediately, of course. His youthful energy burst through as a spattering of training regimes we would have to do. Neji was a bit more reserved but after a few seconds of silence, he nodded in agreement. Maybe he didn't think we could do it. Maybe he was afraid we would hold him back. So I was determined to prove him wrong.

We each had our strengths but, no matter what we said, there were also weaknesses and it was important to balance them out. Lee had no skill in genjutsu or ninjutsu but Neji and I could cover that for him. Neji's skills were primarily defensive and close range combat so Lee and I would have to draw the enemies into his trap. And I could never hope to match Lee's strength or Neji's chakra but from when it came to weapons, I was deadly.

We used our missions to train our tactics. Lee was the first wave, baiting opponents and drawing them to Neji. There the two of them could fight hand to hand while I fired distance weapons. After a few months of this, I was good enough with the katana to stand and fight by their sides.

Our mission record was flawless. There was discussion on the council and a few weeks before the ANBU exam, we all received an invitation to take it. Gai-sensei suggested we train away from Konoha, just the three of us. So we packed up our gear and set out to a secluded campsite a few days away.

The training was intense, I won't lie. There were days I could barely make it to my tent before collapsing. But it was fun too. We were no longer three genin thrown together, we were really a team. We cooked and ate together. We laughed and told stories over the campfire. Well… Lee and I laughed but Neji did smile a few times.

I realized then that I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world. Sure, I might have wanted something different with Neji but now I could be satisfied to have him just as a teammate and friend.

Saying we annihilated the ANBU exam would be an understatement. Even in separate testing, our individual skills were so sharpened from team training that the tests were cake. As a team, we set records, we blew by everyone and at the end, they admitted us not just as individuals but as a team with Neji as our captain.

Neji grumbled about being stuck with Lee again but I could see his smile under Lee's all encompassing hug of triumph. Gai-sensei took us out for dinner and some of the ANBU joined us, sharing their stories about our new jobs. It was a bit intimidating, especially when they talked about getting the tattoo but I put on a strong front.

Until I saw the needles. Hey, I like to throw them, I don't particularly like getting poked with them repeatedly. I stalled for as long as I could but there were other appointments that were coming soon. I tried to get out of it, even made it to the door but the next appointment ran into me.

"Where are you going?" Neji asked, looking down at my bare arm.

"Um," I stuttered, "for… a coffee break?"

He didn't buy it. I never could pass a lie by him. After the tattoo artist came out and explained, he took my hand and sat me down in the chair. I expected a lecture. I didn't expect him to pull up a chair next to me and sit there the entire time while I cringed and came close to breaking his hand.

Compared to getting the tattoo, the missions were much easier. They didn't start us out on S-rank missions right away of course. But the ones we got were supposed to be reasonably tough. We were just good at what we did.

This latest mission was probably the first problem we ever had. It was supposed to be a simple assassination. Lee was going to take out the body guards while Neji kept the door secure and I dealt with our main target.

Unfortunately someone had failed to tell us that the target's bodyguards were a couple of ANBU Mist-nin. It wasn't a real match since we outnumbered and outclassed them but the fight did manage to take out part of the building we were in. That brought the local authority and more attention then we needed.

Lee gave us his weights and took off to draw the police away. It gave us the chance to jump into the sewers and make our way out of town undetected. It was pretty nasty stuff but as a ninja, you need to learn to adapt to this situation. For example, I wrapped the katana higher up on my back to avoid the muck.

Neji decided to adapt by asking me out.

It took a few minutes for those words, those damned words I've waited to come out of his mouth, sink in. And then I let him have.

"HYUUGA NEJI I waited FIVE YEARS for you to ask me that, FIVE years of waiting and wondering, asking for advice, getting tortured by other girls and you pick now, NOW when I waist deep in SEWAGE, completely spent from a fight, covered in blood, dirt and who knows what else to ask me? YOU ARE THE DENSEST HUMAN BEING IN EXISTENCE!"

He just looked at me and smiled. "So I take it that's a yes."