THROUGH THE YEARS
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Warning: Talk of rape, torture and death in this chapter.
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Chapter 14 Tragedy Strikes
April 1988 Florida
Sam was sitting in the base commissary having lunch with a civilian consultant and actually enjoying herself. For the first time in over a year, she was realizing that there was life after Jack O'Neill.
After Jack left for Italy, Sam remained depressed and withdrawn from her friends. Instead of doing as Jack expected her to, and rejoining her friends at parties and night clubs, Sam put all her time into school. She took extra classes, volunteered for extra duties, signed up for different projects. Anything she could think of to get Jack out of her mind.
In all reality, it didn't work very well. A day didn't go by that she didn't think of him. But, with all the extra classes she took on, she completed her course requirements early and was able to graduate from the Academy in January instead of April.
Her dad and her brother came to her graduation. Although they barely talked to each other, Sam was still happy to see them both there. After graduation, Sam went home with her dad to Virginia for two weeks before heading off to the same flight school Jack had attended.
The first couple months were hard for her. Everywhere she went on base reminded her of the short time she was there with Jack. And, when March rolled around and she still heard nothing from Jack, her mind began to overload on a regular basis with worry.
By the time April started, the warm, Florida weather and the bright blue skies, perfect for flying, made Sam's spirits lift significantly. For the first time in over a year, Sam was willing to date again. Not that she was giving up on Jack, but the thought of a social life was becoming more appealing.
She started slowly reemerging on the dating scene. No more than one date a week. Usually just one of the men from her flight classes. Although, she did have dinner once with a major who was stationed at the base.
So, when Dr. Jeff Gilbert, a civilian consultant, asked her to join him for lunch in the commissary, Sam really didn't think much of it. She was even content when the doctor pulled out his wallet to pay for her meal.
They were done eating and just sitting at the table, deep in conversation about anything and everything. She was enjoying herself and had already noticed how attractive the young doctor really was when a sergeant approached their table.
"I'm sorry, ma'am, but the general is requesting you report to his office at once. There was an important phone call for you. I believe it's your father."
Sam's eyes widened in disbelief. Why would her father call the general to get to her? Looking over at the doctor, she said, "I'm sorry, I've got to go."
"Is everything ok?" Jeff asked.
"I don't know. I guess I'll find out," Sam told him, tossing him an apologetic look and then following the sergeant out of the commissary.
Sam wondered again why her father would call the general. She first started to worry that something might have happened to Mark, but then a worse prospect invaded her mind. Sam knew her father was keeping a close eye on the covert missions working out of Italy in hopes of relaying any news of Jack to Sam. If something happened to Jack her dad would definitely call her.
Sam slowed her pace. Dread filling her body that something happened to Jack. Oh God, what would she do? He promised to come back to her. He swore it wasn't his time to die. It can't be him! It wasn't. There was no way. Living her life knowing he would one day be back in it was one thing. Living her life knowing he was gone forever was completely out of the question.
Sam entered the general's office. Her mind still haunting her with possible scenarios of what might have happened to Jack. She saw the general's lips moving. She knew he was talking to her, but what he was saying, she didn't have a clue. Her heart was beating so loudly, all she could hear was the thud, thud, thud in her ears.
Seeing him hold the phone out to her, Sam took it and pressed it to her ear, hoping she would be able to make out what her dad had to say through the rushing of her blood. "Hello," she croaked into the receiver. Her face had turned as white as a sheet and her hands were shaking so bad, she was sure her ear was going to be bruised where the phone kept hitting it.
"Sammie, I've got some bad news, sweetheart," her dad's tender voice came over the line.
Sam tried to swallow the enormous lump in her throat, but it seemed to be taking up permanent residence and wouldn't budge.
"Dad," was all she was able to get out.
"Sam, I just received word from the O'Neill's…."
'No..No..No..No..No..No..' Sam's mind was whirling.
"…I don't know how to tell you this, sweetie, but Sean was killed."
"What?" Sam barely managed to croak out. Her mind was spinning. Sean was the last person she expected her dad to be calling about.
"Rebels invaded the village they were in and killed all of the men. I'm so sorry, sweetie."
"Liz?"
"She's alive. They left the women and children. I imagine she's pretty traumatized though. Sammie, I talked to the general, he's allowing you a week's leave. I've already arranged a flight for you to Wright-Patterson. My flight should arrive just before yours so I'll be waiting for you when you land…..Honey, Elizabeth is going to need you. Not only did she lose her brother, they also killed her fiance."
"Oh God!" Sam cried and covered her mouth, tears immediately forming in her eyes. Thoughts of what Liz must be going through, swirling in her mind. "Dad, what about Jack?"
"The O'Neill's were able to get a hold of him last night. Whether or not he'll be able to make it back in time for the funeral is another matter," Jacob told his daughter, sadly.
"At least he knows," Sam whispered into the phone. "I'll go and pack now, dad, see you soon."
"Bye, sweetie, I love you," Jacob told his daughter, he knew how hard this must be on her.
"You, too, Dad. Bye," She told him before hanging up.
After confirming with the general, Sam rushed to her quarters and packed for a week away and then headed off to her awaiting plane. Thoughts of Sean and the misery the O'Neill's were in right now, running through her head.
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Ohio
Sam stepped off the plane to not only her dad, but another Air Force officer. Standing next to her father on the air field was no one other than Jack O'Neill. As soon as Sam saw him, her eyes filled with tears again. Not because of how badly she missed him. Not because of how relieved she was that he was still alive. But, because she knew how much he must be grieving over his brother, and knowing that he was suffering was enough to break her heart.
Their eyes connected and Sam could read all the misery written in them. Without even acknowledging her father, Sam sprung into Jack's arms. "Oh, God, Jack. I'm so sorry! I can't believe this happened," she cried into his shoulder.
He just held her, tears running down his face. He had been so wound up after finding out about Sean. He moved heaven and earth to make it back to Ohio. He knew he had to be here for his family. He had been so busy, so surprised over the sudden tragic news, he hadn't had the time to cry. But, with Sam wrapped in his arms, his wall had collapsed and he could no longer keep it in.
He cried with her. Letting out all the emotions that had been running through his body in the past 20 hours. His little brother was dead. His sister, physically and emotionally scarred. Jack wasn't told much about what happened, but he was told more than Sam. His parents had informed him that not only did they beat Liz and probably rape her, but they forced her to watch Sean and her fiance be tied up and beaten with metal rods. And, as if that wasn't enough, made her watch as they slit their throats.
He was sickened and disgusted by the news. Anger filled his body and all he wanted to do was hunt down the men responsible and do to them what they did to Sean. But, as soon as he saw Sam again, the anger subsided and the love he felt for her came back on full-force. The only thing he could do was hold her and cry.
Jacob, who had left to arrange a vehicle when Sam embraced Jack, soon returned and finally forced the two apart. The ride to the O'Neill home was somber. This was not a happy reunion. There were no declarations of love this time. They were only together because of a tragedy. They were both aware this was no time for kisses and cuddling. They would seek comfort in each other, but only to relieve the pain, not for passion.
Hugs and tears were shared again once the trio arrived at the O'Neill home. The house was full of friends and relatives, some of whom Sam had never met before. Jack engaged in conversation with many of the people, always aware of where Sam was at in the house. He was determined to keep her close by, for his own sake as well as hers.
When time came for the O'Neill's to head to the airport to pick up Liz and Sean's body, Jacob had volunteered to stay at the house to welcome anyone else who might stop in while they were gone. "Dad, do you want me to stay with you?" Sam asked her father, once she heard him volunteer.
Mrs. O'Neill answered before Jacob had a chance. "Samantha, dear, we were really expecting you to come with us to the airport. You are Elizabeth's best friend. She is going to need your support."
Sam looked at her dad who just nodded his head for her to go with the O'Neill's. "Ok, then," she said, before grabbing her jacket and following Mrs. O'Neill out of the room.
The trip to the airport was even worse than the trip to the O'Neill's. No one said anything, and Sam was sure the grief could actually be felt in the air. As sad as everything had been so far for Sam, when they approached the airport entrance and she saw the hearse parked outside the door, fully aware it was for Sean's body, Sam didn't think she would be able to keep her emotions in check much longer. The lump in her throat, that hadn't left since she heard her dad was on the phone for her, seemed to be growing at an alarming rate.
Their plane arrived only moments after they arrived at the airport. Sam stood back a little as Liz came in to view and her family swarmed her. As much as Sam felt like a member of this family, she knew she really wasn't, and she didn't want to intrude too soon.
When Liz saw Sam, she walked to her and enveloped her in a hug. "I'm so glad you're here, Sam," she cried into her shoulder.
Sam just held her friend, wishing she could take away some of her grief.
The group soon parted in two different directions. The O'Neill men headed off to the funeral home where Sean's body was being taken to get everything organized for the wake and service. The women headed back to the house to get Liz settled in.
As soon as they got home, Liz went up to her old bedroom and laid down on her bed. Just being back home and feeling safe again, a total relief for the young woman. An hour later, Sam knocked on her door with a glass of water. "Can I come in?" Sam asked, tentatively.
Liz sat up a little in bed. "Yeah, sure."
Sam walked in and handed her friend the glass of water. Liz took a few sips and then set it on her night stand. "You ok?" Sam asked.
Liz just looked at Sam, not really knowing how to answer her. "I don't know," she finally said in a low voice. "I'm better now that I'm home….But, what happened, it was so horrible, I don't know if I'll ever get over it, Sam."
Sam sat down next to her friend. "I know, it's going to take time, Liz. What you went through, no one should ever have to go through."
"Sam, don't take this the wrong way or anything, but will you lay down with me. I just…I need someone close. Just until I fall asleep."
Sam nodded her head and crawled under the blankets and laid down in the bed, facing her distraught friend.
After a few minutes of silence, Liz finally broke it by confessing what happened. "They raped me, Sam. They beat me, gave me black eyes, broke my arm," she lifted her arm up, that was indeed in a cast, as if Sam hadn't already seen it. "They made Paul and Sean and all the other men watch as they raped me. Right there on the dirty ground. Not even a cloth to put under me. I can still feel the grime and dirt on my skin, Sam." Liz was crying as she told Sam the horrible details. "You know what's the worst, though? As much as I tried to block everything out, the thing I can't get out of my head was their smell. They smelled so bad. I'm talking the worst possible B.O. ever. I can't get the smell out of my head. It makes me so nauseous."
Sam wrapped her arm around her as she cried, slowly rubbing her back with her hand.
"On the plane home, there was a man, he smelled a little bad. Nothing like the men who did it, but just the little bit was too much for me. I started shaking, totally freaking out. I had to get the stewardess to switch my seat."
"Oh, Lizzie, I'm so sorry," Sam cried. Everything her friend had been through was breaking Sam's heart.
"I have to go to London. Paul's family is there. I have to pay my respects after Sean's funeral. I don't want to go alone, Sam. Can you go with me?"
Sam looked at Liz. Knowing that now was the time she needed her the most. "Of course I'll come with you," she whispered to a much relieved Liz.
Before long, Liz had fallen asleep and Sam crawled out of the bed, making sure she didn't disturb her friend. Sam walked downstairs. Mr. O'Neill was the only one still awake. "Hey, Sam, your dad headed out to a motel. He left your bag by the door. Jack already headed downstairs," he said to her as she walked off the last step.
"Oh, okay," Sam replied, for some reason a little surprised that Mr. O'Neill just assumed she would be sleeping with Jack. Sam walked over and picked up her bag. "Good night, Mr. O'Neill," Sam said as she opened the door to the basement.
"Good night, Samantha. Oh, and Samantha."
Sam turned around. "Yes?"
"Thank you for coming. Your presence here means a lot to all of us," he told her, a sincere look in his eyes.
Sam smiled a small smile. "I wouldn't be anywhere else in the world," she told him. He nodded his head at her, and she turned and headed down the stairs, closing the door behind her.
Jack was laying on the bed, covered with the blankets. His eyes were closed, but Sam was well aware he wasn't asleep. Even after being apart for a little over a year, she was still very well aware of his awake states and his asleep states. He couldn't fool her.
Sam slid her jeans off and then unclasped her bra, pulling it off without having to remove her shirt. Just leaving on her shirt and underwear, Sam pulled back the covers and crawled into the bed. As soon as she laid down, Jack's arm came up and wrapped around her, pulling her body into his. "Liz okay?" he asked, his lips pressed against her ear.
"She will be. Being home where she feels safe is helping," Sam said in a low voice.
"You're helping," Jack told her.
"I want to, I just don't know how," Sam confessed.
"Sam, you already are helping her."
Sam turned so she was facing Jack and set her hand on his side. "I am?"
Jack smiled slightly. "Yes, you are," he told her and then leaned in and kissed her. "I love you," he said once he pulled away.
"I love you, too," Sam said, looking up into his deep, dark eyes. "When do you have to go back to Italy?"
"I don't. I have three days funeral leave and then I have to report back to Peterson."
"Really? Why didn't you tell me earlier?"
Jack lightly shrugged. "I don't know, I wanted to tell you in private. They're promoting me in an awards ceremony as soon as I return."
"Wow, major," Sam said in surprise.
"Yeah. They did say promotions come quickly in black ops."
Sam snuggled a little closer to Jack so she could feel his breath on her face.
"Come back with me, Sam."
"What?"
"Your dad told me the general gave you the whole week off. Come back to Colorado Springs with me after the funeral. I really want you to be there during the ceremony."
"Oh, Jack! I can't," Sam told him.
A defeated look crossed Jack's face. "Oh," he whispered.
"I want to. God, I would love to come back with you, Jack. But, I already promised Liz I would go with her to London so she can pay her respects to Paul's family."
"Oh," he replied, this time with hope in his eyes. "Good, I'm glad you're going with her. She's going to need you."
"Yeah, I know. She uh, she told me what happened." Sam felt Jack's body tense immediately, and she regretted mentioning the ordeal. "Jack, you know this isn't your fault in anyway."
Jack looked at her, surprised that she could still read him so well. But, then a dark look crept across his face. "Ever heard of karma, Sam?"
"You've got to be kidding me, Jack? What happened to Sean had absolutely nothing to do with you or your career. You can't think like that Jack. It's not your fault. The men who did it, they are responsible. They are the only ones responsible."
"Do you think those men are monsters?" Jack asked her, showing no emotion as he awaited her answer.
"Yes, Jack. What they did, to Liz, to Sean and the rest of them. I think they're monsters."
Jack looked at her, utter hatred crossing his face, for whom, Sam didn't know. "That's what I do, Sam. My job is to kill. The government gives me a target and I take him out. I'm no better than the men who killed Sean. I've killed someone's brother, father, son, cousin, husband. I killed. Not out of passion or hatred or grief, but because it's my job. I'm no better than those rebels, Sam. I'm a monster."
"Have you ever killed a man by tying him to a pole and beating him with a metal rod until he's on the brink of death?"
"No."
"Have you ever made a sister watch as you beat and killed her brother?"
"No."
"Have you ever beaten and raped a woman?"
"God, no!"
"You're nothing like those men, Jack. You don't enjoy killing. You do it because you're ordered to by a government that feels there's no other option. The fact that you hate what you do proves you're nothing like them. Don't ever think you are, Jack," Sam told him in a stern voice.
Jack just stared at her for several moments, allowing her words to seep in his head. After what seemed like forever, he pulled Sam closer and cried, once again, on her shoulder. Eventually, the two both fell asleep, both their bodies entwined as one.
The next two days involved more crying and sadness. The day after the funeral, Sam and Lizzie were taken to the airport by the whole entourage of O'Neill's. Jacob had returned to Virginia after the funeral, the day before.
Sam hugged Jack a short distance away from the other O'Neill's for some privacy. "Congratulation, Major," she told him, wrapped in his arms.
"I'm not a major, yet."
"You will be soon. I wish I could be there."
"Me, too. I'll miss you."
"Me, too," Sam replied. "I love you."
"I love you, too, Sam. I'll call you once I'm all settled. I'm not giving up on us."
Sam smiled. "I've never given up on us."
After a passionate kiss good-bye, Sam and Liz boarded their flight.
The Gunther family met them at the airport in London. They were a wonderful family and Sam felt sorry that Liz would never actually become a member of it. They stayed for three days before having to return home. The girls separated in Ohio. Liz heading back to her parents', Sam catching a flight back to Florida.
Sam had only been home for a few hours when there was a knock on her door. Completely exhausted from the past week, Sam grumbled aloud before getting up off her bed and walking to her door. She opened the door to the civilian consultant she had been having lunch with when this mess began.
"Uh, J-Jeff," she said, trying to remember the guy's name.
"Hi, I heard you were getting back today. I was hoping we could maybe make dinner arrangements. We had such a nice time at lunch before you were called away."
"Yes, we did have a good time. I'm sorry, though, I'm afraid I won't be able to do dinner."
The man looked at her very confused. "I don't understand, we seemed to hit it off very well."
"Yes, I had a nice time, but I'm not interested in any sort of relationship right now, sorry," she told him.
"I see."
"I hate to be rude, but I just got in and I'd like to rest," Sam told him, closing the door a little.
"Oh, okay, well, I guess it was nice having lunch with you, Samantha."
"You, too. Good-bye." And with that, Sam shut the door and headed back to bed. No man, unless Major Jack O'Neill showed up, was going to interrupt her much-needed rest.
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a/n: Sorry, I know this chapter was sad.