Through the Years
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
a/n: I don't know how I ended up so lucky to have the best reviewers ever, but you people definitely are. It has been my pleasure writing this story for all of you. If not for the great encouragement and support, I doubt I ever would have gotten this far, so thank you, all of you, very much!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 27: Welcome Back
Washington DC
Sam was depressed. The last three days had gone by in a daze. Although her body was going through all the motions of a normal day, her mind and heart were elsewhere. He left. Even after she told him about Grace, he left. His turmoil over losing Charlie was too strong. She felt like, once again, she overestimated how much Jack really loved her.
Sam was sitting in her lab, alone, pretending like she was working. She had been sitting in the same postion for at least an hour, but her concept of time was impaired do to her mental state. She barely registered the ringing of her phone and was surprised that the person on the other end didn't already give up and hang up by the time she answered.
"Captain Carter," she said into the phone.
"Sam! Thank God, I didn't think you were going to answer," Katherine's voice came across the line. "They're back. They just returned. Even Colonel O'Neill."
Sam let the breath out she was unconsciously holding. "Thank God," she breathed over the line.
"They had to report right to the briefing room. I'm on my way there now, but I wanted to call and let you know first."
"Thank you, Katherine."
"Anytime, Samantha. I'll call you back later and fill you in."
Sam hung up the phone and leaned back in her chair. He was back! Thank God! He was back!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Colorado Springs
Jack had just turned in his mission report when he saw Dr. Langford walk by. "Doctor," he called out to get her attention.
"Colonel," she replied and turned to walk with Jack.
"I was hoping to get a few minutes alone with you," he told her.
"Okay," Katherine replied.
Jack looked around, noting there was no one else in the corridor. He saw a door to his right and setting his hand on Katherine's back, nudged her towards the room.
The room wasn't much bigger than a supply closet. It was completely bare of anything, even security cameras, so Jack thought it was perfect.
Pulling something out of his pocket, he held his hand out to Katherine. "Daniel wanted you to have this."
Katherine eyed the gold Ra pendant in Jack's hand and then looked back up at Jack, confusion and curiosity swimming in her eyes.
"He's not dead," came his reply.
Katherine continued to stare at him, wide-eyed.
"He decided to stay with the people of Abydos. He met a woman, you know that whole love at first sight crap," Jack finished with a twinkle in his eyes.
"So then, you didn't detonate the weapon?"
"Oh yeah, I detonated it alright. It was just aboard Ra's ship at the time. Daniel and the people of Abydos are all alive and well."
"Thank you, colonel, for telling me," Katherine told him after taking in the new information.
"No problem, as long as you don't tell anyone else. I know West, if he finds out, he will send through another bomb."
Katherine nodded her head in understanding. Then, changing the subject, added, "You are due in DC to debrief the president and joint chiefs on Monday?"
"Yup, those are my orders," Jack answered, having no idea where she was going with this.
"Sam and Grace are in DC. She was reassigned there a few weeks ago."
"Really?" Jack asked, his voice dropping drastically. "I didn't know, I really didn't get to talk too much with her before."
"I know," Katherine replied.
"Katherine," Jack started, but then stopped as if he was rethinking what he was about to say.
Katherine cocked her head and patiently waited for Jack to go on.
"Sam, she uh, she's married?"
"No, why would you think that?" Katherine immediately responded.
"She's not?" he asked, his eyes flooding with relief.
"No, she's not," and then with a mischievous twinkle in her eye, concluded, "apparently, she's still very much in love with Grace's dad."
Jack's breath caught in his throat with Katherine's response. "You know I'm Grace's dad, don't you?"
Katherine smiled. "Samantha filled me in after you went through the gate."
Jack nodded his head, still trying to regain control of his emotions. "She was engaged, though?"
Katherine took a deep breath before answering Jack's question. It was apparent that he still loved Sam as much as she still loved him and Katherine really didn't want to blow this for them. "A couple years ago, before our project was approved. The engagement only lasted about a month."
"A month?" Jack cut in.
"Yes. I doubt she ever really loved him, not that much, anyways. She only agreed to marry him because she wanted Grace to have a father-figure. When she told him she was going to tell you about Grace, he went ballistic, so she called off the engagement. The next day, our project was approved and we moved out here. I don't think she's seen or heard from him since."
Jack nodded his head again. "Thank you, Katherine. It was a pleasure meeting you."
"You, too, colonel," Katherine replied just before Jack opened the door and left the room.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Washington DC
Sam was a nervous wreck! She took an extra long time getting ready that morning, knowing that Jack would be at the Pentagon. She couldn't do much with her clothes, she had to wear her dress blues, but she did try to tease her hair and apply her makeup flawlessly.
She entered the Pentagon, her whole body shaking in nervousness and excitement. The debriefing wasn't until 0900 and it was only a little before 0800, so Sam decided to start working on some of the readouts from the malp transmission. The information the malp had transmitted was astounding. With so much information, Sam was sure she would have months of research to go through.
Just like always, once Sam got into her work, she completely forgot about everything else around her and was only roused back to the world by a light knock on the door.
"Captain Carter, the debriefing starts in five minutes, aren't you going?" Major Paul Davis asked from the door.
Sam looked up from her work. "Oh! Yeah! Thanks for getting me. I probably would have missed the whole thing," she replied, slightly flustered. She grabbed her file and followed Davis out of her office.
The briefing room was packed with officers when Sam and Davis arrived. Since the debriefing was due to start any minute, Sam and Davis were motioned to have a seat.
The briefing room was one of the larger ones at the Pentagon. It had a table at the front of the room, followed by five rows of chairs. Sam took her seat and looked around at the sea of blue in front of her. Considering all she had done to get the project up and running and all the work she put in to creating the dialing program, Sam was a bit perturbed over the fact that she was motioned to sit in the last row of chairs. Yeah, maybe she was only a captain and the room was full of majors, colonels, and generals, but, jeez, without her, they never would have gotten as far as they did with the Stargate!
Sam scoped out the room, trying to see if she could locate Jack between the other officers who were still standing. Sam's eyes settled on General West, standing towards the front of the room. She was still a little surprised that she hadn't been written up yet after her little trip back to Cheyenne Mountain. No matter what, she would never regret taking Grace and trying to stop Jack, but at the same time, she really didn't want a mark on her, so far, spotless service record, either.
Before Sam could think any further about West, she saw a man step away from in front of him and walk to the other side of the table. Jack! 'Figures West would block his whole body!' Sam mentally commented, keeping her eyes on Jack.
Jack stood on the other side of the table and looked out over the room. His eyes connected with Sam's for a brief second, but he pulled them away before anyone could recognize the look in his eyes. He coughed lightly to get everyone's attention and then started giving his detailed briefing of his experience through the Stargate.
When the debriefing was concluded, the officers began chatting and mingling, once again. Sam stood up, trying to get to Jack, who was already being bombarded with questions from several of the officers. She was stopped by Major Johnson on her way about the malp findings. She told him what she had learned so far in as few of words as possible and started towards Jack, yet again.
She was so close! Only a few feet away. He saw her coming, his eyes had wandered towards her while General Burkhart was rambling on about something or other. Only a few feet away and she was, once again, stopped. This time by General Hammond.
"Captain Carter, could you come with me? I need to discuss something with you," General Hammond announced, walking up to Sam and gesturing for her to leave the room.
Damn it!
Sam looked up at General Hammond and out of the corner of her eye, noticed General West watching her. 'Shit! Here it comes,' she thought while mentally kicking herself in the butt. "Yes, sir," Sam said aloud, the sound of defeat in her voice. Turning to follow Hammond out of the room, she glanced over to Jack and caught his eye. She half-smiled in an apologetic gesture before turning back and walking out of the room.
She followed General Hammond back to his office, the whole time mad that she wasn't able to talk to Jack and worried about what kind of punishment she was going to receive for her insubordination to a superior officer. Not just a superior officer, a general! Man, she was in deep!
"Please, have a seat, captain," the general said after walking in his office.
Sam walked over and sat in one of the chairs in front of his desk.
"I'm sorry about pulling you away, but I just received word…."
'Ah, great, here it comes,' Sam thought to herself.
"…that I am being sent to oversee the Stargate Project."
'What?' Sam didn't say the word out loud, but the look on her face said it for her.
General Hammond looked at Sam with a mischievous look in his eye. "After receiving information that West chose O'Neill because of his mental state, the Pentagon feels it would be in their best interest to transfer West off the project. They asked me to take it over until my retirement date."
"That's wonderful, sir," Sam finally replied, smiling.
"I know that you just moved back to DC, but I want you back on the project. You did amazing things for the short amount of time you were there. I'm hoping with the new information, we can figure out if this thing can go elsewhere, or only to Abydos…."
"I would love to transfer back to the project, sir," Sam interrupted in excitement.
Hammond smiled at Sam. "Good. Is next Monday too soon to report or…"
"It's perfect. I'll be there." Sam smiled.
"Great. If you have any questions, you know how to reach me. You're dismissed."
"Thank you, sir," Sam replied and stood up to leave. She left the general's office thrilled about being transferred back, but then, remembering Jack in the briefing room, she picked up her pace and hurried back to the room.
As soon as she walked into the room, her heart dropped. Only three officers were still in the room and none of them were Jack. Heartbroken, Sam lugged herself back to her office.
She unlocked her door and flipped the lightswitch on. "Hey, that's bright," came the most wonderful voice she had ever heard.
Her heart was back in place. "How'd you get into my office?"
"Sam, come on, I'm black ops. Do you really have to ask?" he teased, still leaning against her desk.
Sam bit her bottom lip and took a step closer. "I'm glad you're here."
"Are you?" he asked, cocking his head to the side.
"Of course, Jack. Why wouldn't I be?"
"I don't know. You didn't seem to need me in your life for the last seven years."
"I needed you, you were just married to someone else," Sam quickly retorted, wondering how this was going sour so fast.
Jack stared at her, his face expressionless. Finally, just when Sam was sure she was going to die of suspense, he spoke again. "Do you have any idea what it's like to see a little girl and, never having seen her before and having no idea who she is, yet for some reason, feeling drawn to her?………That first day….I saw her and she was such a cute little girl. Charlie told me she was his friend, Grace. She was crying because you couldn't make it on the field trip……..I just….I wanted to take her in my arms and make everything bad in her life go away." Jack stopped and looked at Sam, tears filling his own eyes. "I fell in love with her that day. She reminded me so much of you…her smile, the way she chatted on about everything, her mannerisms……….. She, she told all the same stories about the constellations that you used to tell me. Maybe I should have figured it out, I don't know, maybe a part of me did."
Sam stood there, tears in her own eyes.
"Even before knowing she was my daughter, before knowing she was your daughter, I loved her, Sam. I loved her and I didn't know why. Do you have any idea how that feels to love a child you barely know?"
Sam shook her head, the tears finally escaping her eyes.
He stared at her again for countless minutes before continuing. "In Iraq, she would have been what? A year and a half, almost two?"
Sam nodded her head. "Twenty-one months."
"Why didn't you tell me then? Why, Sam? I could have at least had the last four years with her."
"I tried! I tried, but you were kissing me and I thought we would have time afterwards.."
"Well, you thought wrong didn't you?" His voice raising. "You could have left me a note. You could have called me when the war ended. Hell, Sam! You should have told me as soon as you found out you were pregnant! Sara was a bitch, but at least she told me she was pregnant with my child!"
"What? Tell you I was pregnant? And what difference would that have made, Jack? You and Sara were already married! What would you have done, moved me and Grace in with Sara and Charlie? Maybe we could have split you during the week? Would you have liked that? I got pregnant! I dealt with it! I raised our daughter. I took care of her. I supported her. I gave up the astronaut program for her and I will never regret it. Never! While you were living your perfect little suburban, happy family life, I was living my own happy life with Grace."
"HAPPY? You think I was HAPPY? Do you have any idea what my life has been like? I gave up everything for Charlie! I gave up my own happiness for him. I gave up you, Sam! Do you really think I was happy? Yeah, I loved Charlie with every fiber of my being, he was my world, but Charlie was the only happiness in my life!"
Sam lowered her head. "You were married, Jack. You had a family, I wasn't going to take that from you," she whispered.
Jack walked over and lifted Sam's chin. "Let me tell you about my happy family life. Sara threatened to abort Charlie if I didn't marry her. After we were married, I couldn't touch her without feeling like I was betraying you. Of course, that was a short-term problem considering the last time I had sex with Sara she was eight months pregnant with Charlie. After Charlie was born, she went into post-partum depression and wouldn't have anything to do with either of us. Then, I went off on a stupid rescue mission that I thought you were on and became a POW for four months. When I got back, Sara announced she was sleeping with other men because she thought I was dead. When I tried to find you, she threatened to take Charlie and disappear if I left her for you. Finding you in Iraq was like a dream come true. When I came back, I found Sara in bed with a druggie, I packed Charlie up and we moved out. Sara had her rich, doctor friends at the hospital help her hire an expensive attorney. She threatened to use you, claiming I was having an affair with you. If it wasn't for that, I would have found you then, Sam. But, I couldn't afford to lose Charlie to her."
Sam was speechless.
Jack let go of her chin and walked to the other side of the room. "Sara was a bitch since the day I met her. I would expect her to do whatever she could to hurt me. But, you, Sam? Even though I was married, she is my daughter, Sam. How could you keep her from me?"
"I…I didn't want to, I didn't know what else to do," Sam cried.
"No, Sam. You could have thought of something else. You chose not to. Isn't that what you told me? I could have found another way. That I didn't even try! Do you know those words have kept me up for years? The sound of your broken voice as you told me you were sorry that I had to wreck both our lives. An enormous part of me died the day you drove away, Sam. It killed me inside."
Before Sam could respond, Jack rushed to the door and left her office. Wiping away the tears, she ran, red-faced, out of her office, trying to stop him. "Jack!" she yelled, but he continued to hurry down the corridor, not even turning around.
"Jack!" she yelled again before noticing all the personnel staring at her. Realizing she probably looked a mess, she turned back into her office and shut the door. Jack was gone! He came and said what he needed to say and left. She slowly lowered her body to the floor and cried into her knees, her back still pressed against her office door.
She wasn't sure how long she stayed in that postion, crying her eyes out. Her panty hose were drenched from her tears. Her eyes were red and swollen and her nose could have been mistaken for a leaky faucet.
When her last tear was wiped away, she stood up and tried to compose herself. Reaching for a couple tissues, she wiped her face and blew her nose. Finally, about half an hour later, Sam felt she was presentable enough to leave her office. It was late, the sun had already set and Sam started to worry slightly about Grace. This wasn't the first time that Sam was late picking up Grace, but she always worried whenever she was.
Grace was playing with the only kid remaining in the day care when Sam arrived. "Mommy, you're late," she chastised, walking over to her mom when she saw her there.
"I know, sweetie, I'm sorry. I had a hard day at work."
"That's okay, Mom. I was playing with Thomas. Bye Thomas," Grace called back to the boy who was across the room.
Grace could tell her mom was in a sad mood, so she chose to remain quiet for the ride home. They sat in silence the whole way back to the apartment. Sam helped Grace out of the car, and they walked up the two flights of stairs to their new apartment.
Just as they reached their floor, they turned to head down the hall to their apartment when Sam stopped dead in her tracks.
There, sitting against their apartment door, was Jack! When he saw them, he stood up, his hands finding their way into his pocket.
Sam was frozen in her spot. Why was he here? Did he want to yell at her some more? Did he want to apologize? Did he just come to see Grace? Sam was frozen in her spot.
"You're here?" Sam gasped.
Jack cleared his throat, his eyes conveying a deep pain. "There is no where else in the universe I want to be than here with you and Grace."
Sam was surprised that her face was already soaked in tears. She was still confused. Did this mean he was forgiving her? Was he here for good? She just looked at him, tears rolling down her cheeks and a look of hope on her face.
Jack took a step closer. "I'm sorry. I was mad at myself for my mistakes in life and I took it out on you. I love you so much, Sam. I always have. Please, forgive me. For this, for everything. I don't deserve you, but I can't live without you."
Sam let out a sob, she just couldn't stop crying. "Jack, I love you," she cried, her hands covering everything on her face but her eyes.
Jack took the two more steps to Sam and wrapped her in his arms. "Oh, Sam. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry," he cried.
"Me, too," she cried back.
He pulled off her shoulder and gently pushed her wet hair off her face. Leaning in, he captured her lips and kissed her with all the passion that had been missing in his life for the last seven years.
He loved Charlie, and he would always treasure the years he had with his son. But, he was finally back where he belonged, in Sam's arms.
Grace, who had stood a little back from her mom during the whole exchange, slowly approached her parents. "Mommy?" she whispered, unsure of exactly what was going on.
Jack, reluctantly, pulled away from Sam's lips. Stroking her cheek, he looked in her eyes for a moment before turning to his daughter. "Hey, Gracie," he said in a soft voice.
"Hi," Grace replied in her sweet, angelic voice.
He leaned down enough to scoop her up in his arms. Standing back up, he wrapped his other arm back around Sam. "My two best girls," Jack said, kissing Grace on her cheek.
Sam kissed Grace's other cheek and then looked back at Jack. "Come on, let's go inside," she said and nudged them towards the door. They entered the small apartment as a family.
A family that would never be broken again.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So, I know this chapter had a lot of angst and I promised a happy, fluff-filled last chapter, so I wrote an epilogue. A completely fluff-filled, happy-go-lucky epilogue. Enjoy!