Once again, a year or two has passed in the story so here are the new ages:

Tommy, Phil, Lil, Kimi-29
Dil-28
Chuckie-30
Angelica, Susie-31
Mikey-about 1
Frederick-about 2 or 3

Chapter 27

"I love summer." Tommy smiled. He, Chuckie, Phil, and Dil were on the roof of the apartment building in lawn chairs with sunglasses on.

"Me too." Chuckie sighed. "Guys' day off."

"You know the girls are plotting something, right?" Dil asked.

"Duh." Phil rolled his eyes. "The only reason they let us do nothing today is because they're either planning a birthday, a divorce," he looked at Tommy, "an engagment, or just to get away from us."

"Divorce?" Tommy asked nervously. "I'm the only married one. You don't think they're planning a divorce, do you?"

"Nah." Chuckie said. "Since those girls have to hang out with us everyday, I'd say they need a break from us."

"How could they not want to hang with us?" Tommy asked. "And Lil. She's my wife. How could my own wife not wanna hang out with me? Me?"

"Don't worry T." Phil calmed his friend. "It'll be fine. You could use a break from her too."

"It's actually pretty obvious that they're just trying to get away from us." Chuckie said. "Kimi insisted on taking Frederick to a baby sitter and Lil did the same."

"So guy's night out?" Phil asked raising up.

"Um," Dil looked at his watch. "It's noon."

"So guy's day out?" Phil asked again.

"Yes!" Tommy shouted. "Let's make the most of this!"

"Another margarita, Lillian?" Kimi asked.

"Of course." Lil smiled as Kimi poured more margarita in her glass. Lil, Kimi, Susie, and Angelica were at Angelica's apartment. "The guys will never think of finding us here."

"Yeah." Angelica nodded. "No one ever comes to my apartment."

"So, what do you girls wanna do?" Susie asked.

"I made a schedule." Lil smiled looking at a piece of paper. "First, we drink til noon."

"Check." Angelica smiled taking the last drink of her glass.

"Then we improvise." Lil smiled throwing the list over her shoulder.

"Sounds pretty good." Susie nodded.

Tommy, Phil, Chuckie, and Dil were now in Doug's Diner with beers in their hands.

"And she says," Tommy mocked, "Clean that up!"

They all burst out laughing and guests in the diner got aggrevated with them and left until no one was in the diner except them.

"You jerks!" Doug came up to them. "You ran out the whole place. I knew serving you beers was a bad idea."

"No it wasn't." Dil shook his head. "Hey, you guys wanna go to a strip joint?"

"Nah, too hard gettin' there." Phil sighed. "So let's order one!"

"Okay!" Chuckie yelled.

"Crap." Tommy shook his head. "I'm married."

"So..." Phil said. "Pretend you're not!"

"Okay!" Tommy smiled.

"Back to...uh, who's apartment?" Phil asked.

"Tommy's?" Dil suggested. "It's the biggest."

"Okay!" Tommy yelled. "Let's go!"

"Crap." Phil put the phone down in Tommy's apartment. He went and sat down next to Chuckie and Dil on the couch. Tommy was at the kitchen table. "They won't give us one."

"Why?" Tommy asked.

"Said it has to be a special occation." Phil rolled his eyes.

"Alright, call back and say it's a bachelor party." Chuckie grinned. "We'll say it's Tommy's."

"Why mine?" Tommy asked.

"Since you're already married, it won't be such a bad lie." Chuckie shrugged.

Phil nodded and picked up the phone and redialed. "Hello? I'd like to order a stripper. Yes. The occation? Bachelor party. My buddy. Please, make it a hot one. Why you ask? Well, you should see his fiancee'."

Tommy turned and glared at Phil. "Hey."

"Nope, it's my sister. Yes, I'm calling my sister ugly. Twin sister. Well, no, if I'm calling her ugly I'm not particularly calling my self ugly. What? No! Just send a friggin' stripper!" Phil then hung up and sighed. "Idiot."

"Dude," Dil smiled. "Calling Lil ugly is kind of calling yourself ugly."

"Yeah." Tommy chuckled.

"Shut up." Phil glared at Tommy. "You married her. Anyway, we'd better call some more people to make it actually look like a bachelor party."

"No." Tommy shook his head. "Guys' night out. Us four. We'll just say that we have no friends."

"I think a bachelorette party would be great." Susie shrugged as they all walked into Doug's Diner.

"Is there even a such thing?" Lil asked.

"Yeah." Angelica nodded.

"Why didn't I get one?" Lil asked pitifully.

"We didn't feel like it." Angelica replied.

"Well," Kimi said, "Where do you wanna have it?"

"How about my apartment?" Lil suggested.

"That sounds good." Kimi nodded.

When Doug heard this, his head raised up. "Um, Lillian."

"Yeah?" she turned to him.

"I don't think your apartment is the best place. Heh heh." Doug said.

"Why?" Lil asked a little suspicious.

"Um," Doug said, "That's where the guys are."

"We'll run'em out." Lil smiled. "It is my apartment."

"Isn't it techinically Tommy's?" Angelica asked.

"No." Lil shook her head. "Tommy's never actually had is own place. He's either lived with Chuckie or Phil or me. It's my apartment."

All four boys jumped up when they heard a knock at the door.

"She's here." Phil whispered. "What do we do?"

Tommy, Chuckie, and Dil just stared at him. Tommy then spoke up, "Answer it, maybe?"

"No way, man." Phil shook his head. "It's your house."

"Fine." Tommy walked over to the door and opened it.

"Someone order a stripper?" a girl dressed as a maid in lingerie, walked in. She slammed the door and examined the boys. "Okay, I'm Jasmine."

"Hello Jasmine." they all four smiled.

"Which one of you boys is Tommy?" Jasmine asked.

"M-Me." Tommy grinned.

"Alrighty then." Jasmine pushed Tommy back on the couch and climbed into his lap and began giving him a lap dance.

"Holy freakin' shit." Phil smiled sitting the chair across from the couch watching the lap dance.

"I don't know if I should be doing this." Tommy grunted.

"Shut your mouth." Jasmine ordered slapping Tommy.

"Do it again." Dil smiled.

"What?" Tommy turned to his brother but Jasmine slapped him again. "That's starting to hurt."

Phil, Chuckie, Tommy, and Dil all turned their heads when they heard the door handle rattling. "Oh crap." Dil groaned.

"It's locked." they heard Lil say on the other side.

"Well, unlock it." they heard Angelica said.

"Crap!" Tommy threw Jasmine off standing up.

"Ouch!" Jasmine shouted.

"Hide her!" Tommy yelled to the others. Dil and Chuckie drug Jasmine to Kimi's room and closed and locked it just as the girls walked in.

"Tommy?" Lil asked. "What are you guys doing here?"

"Um..." Tommy groaned. "Nothing."

"Where's Chuckie and Dil?" Kimi asked.

"No where." Phil shrugged. "I mean...uh...they went home."

"Why?" Susie asked.

"Uhhh." Tommy shrugged. "I don't know."

In Kimi's bedroom, Dil and Chuckie had their ears to the door trying to listen but Jasmine kept rubbing her hands all over Chuckie.

"Stop." Chuckie whispered to her.

"No." she whispered back.

"Okay." he shrugged.

"I wish they'd hurry up and leave." Dil said.

Back to the others...

"Um, guys." Lil said. "Could you, I don't know, leave?"

"No." they both shook their heads casually.

"Please." Angelica smiled.

"No." they said again.

"Come on." Kimi nudged Phil then Tommy. "Leave. Just go. Leave."

"No." they once again said.

"Dammit, Tommy!" Lil shouted. "This is my house!"

"Uh." Tommy moaned nervously.

"Now get out! We have important girl business to do!" Lil yelled.

"Um," Tommy groaned. "What are you all doing?"

"Uhh." Lil looked at him nervously. "Classified."

"No, no." Tommy grinned. "You can tell me."

"No she can't." Angelica shook her head.

"Oh, no, you're not getting me like this again." Tommy smiled. "This is my house too, so tell me what you plan on doing with it."

"Well," Lil said. "What are you doing with it?"

"Um," Tommy said, "Drinking beer, watching football, crap like that."

"You can watch football at Phil's." Lil said.

"I didn't pay my cable bill." Phil shrugged. "No TV."

"How about Dil's?" Susie asked.

"No ESPN." Tommy sighed. "That poor boy."

"So, what are you guys doing with it?" Phil asked.

"Um," Angelica pondered. "Comparing breast size."

All the girls turned and glared at her but Tommy and Phil grinned. "Can't we stay?" Phil asked.

"No." Lil turned to her brother. "I don't want you seeing my breasts."

"Eww." Phil shook his head. "Not you. Them." Phil pointed to Angelica, Kimi, and Susie who glared at him. "Sorry."

"Plus, Tommy's my cousin." Angelica sighed. "That'd just be wrong."

"No way, Lil." Tommy glared at her. "For tonight, it's our's."

"It's one o'clock." Angelica looked at her watch.

"Fine." Tommy rolled his eyes. "For today, it's our's."

"Just you and Phil?" Kimi asked.

"No." Tommy shook his head. "Chuckie and Dil just went to their place to get some popcorn."

"We have popcorn." Lil glared.

"Well, I didn't know." Tommy rolled his eyes.

"Fine." Lil sighed as the four girls walked out.

Dil, Chuckie, and Jasmine then walked out.

"Where were we?" Tommy asked sitting back on the couch.

"I knew it!" Lil yelled as the girls ran back in. "No wait. I didn't know that." she said looking at the stripper.

"Tommy?" Kimi asked. "What is that?"

"A stripper." Dil smiled.

"Hey Angelica." Jasmine gave a small wave to Angelica.

"Hey." Angelica waved back.

"You know her?" Lil asked Angelica who just nodded. "Tommy, why is there a stripper in my home?"

"Well," Jasmine said, "It is a bachelor party."

"What?" Lil shouted. "Tommy and I have been married for...uh..."

"About five years." Kimi sighed.

"Exactly!" Lil yelled. "About five years. We have a child."

Jasmine turned to all four boys and glared at them. "What?"

"Uh..." Phil stuttered. "Tommy? We had no idea!"

Tommy turned and glared at Phil then said to Jasmine, "Maybe you should just go."

Jasmine rolled her eyes and left.

"Maybe we should go to." Chuckie said.

"Maybe you should." Tommy sighed.

Chuckie, Dil, and Phil all walked out the door. "Us too." Susie grinned nervously and walked out followed by Kimi and Angelica.

Once everyone was gone, Tommy said, "Well, Lil, you're taking this alot better than I expected."

"No, no." she shook her head. "I just didn't want to make a scene in front of everyone." Lil grinned punching Tommy in the stomach. "Do you know what I thought when I saw that stripper at first? I figured you was cheating on me!"

"Sorry." Tommy groaned over the pain in his gut.

"You bastard." Lil said punching him again in the stomach and pushing him back on the couch. She stood over him glaring at him. "Can't you go a week without pissing me off?"

"Uh...no?"

"Tommy," Lil shook her head. "You've done alot of bad things since we've been together, but throwing a fake bachelor party just to get a stripper? That's low, Tommy, very low."

"Uh...sorry?"

"Oh, oh, oh, no." Lil smiled mischeivously. "Sorry won't do it this time. What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Uh...nothing?"

"No, no." Lil shook her head. "There is something wrong with you. Tommy, you just sometimes act so crazy! What made you think you'd get away with this?"

"Uh...I don't know."

"Was this your idea?" Lil asked leaning in looking him in the eyes.

"Uh...Phil's. And Dil's. Dil wanted to go to a strip joint but Phil wanted to order one. Naturally, we all gave into peer pressure and let Phil talk us into it."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Figures." Lil rolled her eyes sitting down in Tommy's lap with one leg on each side.

"W-Whatcha doin'?" Tommy asked nervously.

"Nothing." Lil smiled wrapping her legs around him.

"Holy crap." Tommy nervously smiled. "Now whatcha doin'?"

"Still nothing." Lil grinned. "But, now, I'm gonna show you the consequences of doing something, that betrays me, behind my back."

"Heh heh." Tommy nervously grinned again. "Is it gonna hurt?"

"Let's see." Lil smiled leaning kissing him deeply.

"I'm bored." Phil groaned. Him, Dil, Chuckie, Angelica, Susie, and Kimi were all in Phil's apartment.

"Me too." Kimi said. "Let's go get some pizza or something."

"Nah." Phil shook his head. "I ain't in the mood for pizza."

"I'm in the mood for a stripper." Dil sighed.

"Hey!" Phil smiled. "Let's spy on T and Lil."

"No way." Angelica shook her head.

"Remember what happened the last time we spied on them?" Kimi asked.

"Oh yeah." Phil said shivering. "That was just wrong."

"I left my purse in there." Susie sighed. "I layed it down when I figured we were throwing the bachelorette party."

"I knew it!" Phil shouted jumping up.

"Oops." Susie grinned nervously at Angelica and Kimi who were glaring at her.

"A bachelorette party?" Dil asked.

"Oh, Lil is so busted." Chuckie chuckled evilly.

"Geeze, Chuck." Dil said. "Have you had alot of sugar today? You've been real energetic lately."

"I've been drunk most of the day." Chuckie nodded.

"I'm gonna tell Lil that we know!" Phil yelled running out.

"No wait!" all three girls yelled following him.

As Phil was about to open the door, he stopped and put his ear to it.

"Phil!" all three girls ran up to him.

"Shh!" Phil turned to them then went back to the door as Chuckie and Dil came over to them.

They all put their ears to the door and heard, "Oh! Oh! Yes!"

"Holy crap." Phil smiled. "They're doing it."

"Seriously?" Dil asked listening closer. "Oh my God, they are!"

"Guys, we can't listen to that." Susie sighed.

"Sure we can." Kimi nodded.

"Yeah." Angelica nodded in agreement.

"Okay." Susie shrugged listening through the door.

"God, they've been in there four friggin' hours." Kimi looked at her watch. Phil was the only one still listening. The others were just sitting in the middle of the hall waiting for Phil to get finished.

"You done yet, Phil?" Angelica asked.

"Nope." Phil said taking a bite of a candy bar. "They're still going at it."

"Come on Phil." Chuckie rubbed his forehead. "Let's go to Doug's or something."

"No way." Phil smiled shaking his head. "They're still going at it."

"Phil." Kimi sighed. "They went at it. They've been going at it. And they're going to keep going at it."

"I know." Phil smiled. "Oh, I know."

"Phil, you are sick." Angelica glared at him.

"Gets me from here to there." Phil shrugged. "Hey. They stopped. No wait. Okay, there they go." he smiled as he nodded.

"Phil," Kimi walked over to him. "This is sick. Let's go."

"No way." Phil shook his head.

Kimi rolled her eyes and her and Angelica grabbed him and drug him back to Phil's apartment. They all went in and shut the door.

"Hey!" Phil yelled as Kimi and Angelica threw him on the couch. "It was just getting good."

"It's been good through the whole thing." Dil sighed. "I'm going home."

"Me too." Chuckie said following Dil out.

"Later." Angelica said as her and Susie left as well.

Kimi sighed sitting down next to Phil on the couch. "So, what do ya wanna do?"

"Well, I-"

"Except that." Kimi rolled her eyes.

"Okay." Phil sighed. "I don't know then."

"Well, I can't go home." Kimi smiled. "So, mind if I sleep here tonight?"

"It's only five o'clock." Phil said.

"Oh yeah." Kimi chuckled. "Well, do you want to play a game or go to Doug's or...something?"

"I don't know." Phil shrugged. "Want to call a stripper and..." Phil noticed Kimi glaring at him. "Uh, nevermind."

"Okay, Phil." Kimi smiled at him. "I'm about to do this because I care."

"Pass the popcorn." Phil said. Kimi smiled giving him a bucket of popcorn as they both sat at the door listening to Tommy and Lil.

"Phillip, we are sick, sick people." Kimi chuckled.

"I know." Phil shrugged eating a hand full of popcorn. "But you know something I don't understand?"

"What's that?"

"Everytime those two get mad at eachother or fight, they make up. With sex, usually. But, why couldn't you and I ever make up?"

Kimi looked him in the eyes and just smiled. "I don't know, Phil. I just don't know."

Phil smiled back then gasped. "Wait. They've stopped."

"How can you tell?" Kimi asked.

"Because they're talking." Phil said trying to listen harder. "Uh oh. I think they know we're here."

Phil and Kimi quickly jumped up and ran into Phil's apartment and closed the door just as Lil opened the door, dressed in silky, sexuallingerie, and looked around. She shrugged and went back inside, locking the door.