Roy's Evil Plan to Get Back at Ed (Part 1)

Fullmetal-Alchemist10: Ok, this is a two part thing, so don't get mad at the cliffhanger, I'll update tomorrow, don't worry! I don't want any flames on the cliffhanger

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist... (cries)

Roy was sitting outside of Ed's apartment, waiting for him to fall asleep. It was 2 AM and Ed was still awake. Roy then heard Al mumbling, "Nii-san, go to bed. You can read more later."

"Okay, let me just finish reading this page. "There was a few minutes silence, then a bed creaking. Roy then heard footsteps toward the bathroom and heard Ed brushing his teeth. Then he heard footsteps walking back to the main room, and creaking of a bed again. Then he saw that the lights were shut off.

"Well, I think I should wait for about two hours so I know he's defiantly sound asleep," Roy thought to himself.

After about an hour, Roy heard Ed snoring lightly. "I hope no one walks past here, they're going to think I'm some gay pervert waiting to rape Ed." As soon as Roy thought that, Havoc walked past, half-asleep.

"Colonel, what are you doing sitting outside of Ed's room?" Havoc yawned.

"I'm waiting to get my revenge," Roy mumbled.

"Okay, you go do that. I'll just go back to my room." Havoc walked away not suspecting anything due to the fact he was half-asleep.

Roy sat there for another half hour when all of a sudden he thought to himself, "I don't want to be too mean to Ed, I'll leave him a crutch so he can still go to work. Although, I'm not sure whether that's being nice or being mean… oh, well"

Roy runs back to his apartment to find a crutch. "Hmmm… I wonder where I got this…" Roy shrugged and ran back to sit outside of Ed's room. Ed was now snoring loudly.

"Okay, I think it's a good time to get him." Roy quietly enters Ed's room, "He looks so cute when he's sleeping… wait, that was really perverted, who cares? Ok, Roy, focus, you have to get Ed's automail arm and leg without him noticing…"

Roy slowly pulls up Ed's right sleeve to reveal an automail arm. Al stirs behind Roy, scaring the crap out of him. "I wish Al wasn't so noisy when he moved… Okay, just need to press this button and turn it slightly… There we go!"

Roy had gotten Ed's arm off. Ed winced in pain, but immediately went back to normal. "Wow, he must be really asleep… now onto the leg."

The leg proved to harder to take off since Ed started kicking Roy. Roy stifled a yelp of extreme pain when Ed had kicked him in a sensitive area. Strangely, Ed was grinning while Roy was suffering, but still sound asleep.

Roy stayed in a fetal position on the floor for five minutes until he recovered. "Okay, back to that leg." Roy then just quickly grabbed Ed's left leg and pulled it off before he could be kicked again.

Roy then quietly ran out of the room before anything else happened.

He then remembered that he forgot to leave the crutch there, and ran back into the room. Roy then place the crutch on the chairs. Then, Roy thought of writing a ransom note. He grabbed a pencil and paper from Ed's desk, and wrote a note, disguising his handwriting. Roy then left the note on the crutch, then left.

"I'm tired… I'm never going to be able to wake up for work later, but it was worth it." Roy then hid the limbs in the abyss of his closet, then went to bed.

Morning in Ed's Apartment

"WHERE IS MY ARM AND LEG?"

"Nii-san, not so loud, you're going to wake up the neighbors and the rest of the town," Al said sleepily.

"AL, I CURRENTLY DON'T CARE ABOUT THE NEIGHBORS! I WANT MY ARM AND LEG BACK! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GO ANYWHERE?" Ed was enraged.

"Look, there's a crutch over there and a note." Al pointed at the chair.

Ed hops over to the hair to read the note. It said:

I have taken your arm and leg in revenge. If you wish to have your limbs back, I suggest you come to work in your boxers.

"Wow, that's quite a demand, nii-san," Al said after reading the note over Ed's shoulder.

"Well, I narrowed the suspect down to two people, Roy and Envy," Ed said after a little thinking.

"Did someone say my name?" Envy popped into the room through the window. "Hey, Hagane No Chibi, where's your arm and leg?"

Ed then spazed at being called 'Fullmetal Pipsqueak' then fell over since he had only one leg to spaz on.

Envy laughed. "Well, whoever did this to you, I have to meet them. They must be really mad at you." Envy then jumped out the window onto a tree limb.

"Well, at least now I know who took my arm and leg. I just wonder how I'll get there."

"The thief left you with a crutch so that you aren't completely immobilized. Also, remember you have to go to work in your boxers to get your limbs back." Al started snickering.

"Just wonderful." Ed stripped down to his boxers, then left.

To be continued... Bum Bum Bum!

Fullmetal-Alchemist10: I hope you liked the chapter, but the next chapter will probably be better...

To the insane reviewers!

crazyanimefreak15: I don't know what makes me think that you're insane...

Me: (pokes Ed) Hagane No Chibi-san!

Ed: NANI! (What!)

Me: (Runs)

Shadow Kitsune Kirby: I'm so happy I made you laugh out loud! Your review made me happy until I started watching depressing anime music videos!