15. Interrogation

Sorry it's been a while since my last update! My roommate's boyfriend was here all weekend and I couldn't really find alone time to write! Thank you all SO much for your reviews! I hope you enjoy!

Jack and I did it twice before midnight, and once more after midnight. After that last round, Jack and I just laid in bed and talked.

"Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm curious…" I began saying, as I turned onto my side, facing him, "I promise I won't get upset or anything, but, I was wondering…just how many women have you been with?" Jack chuckled a light laugh before answering.

"I had a feeling you might ask that," he said finally, a smile forming on his lips as he lit up his cigarette.

"Oh really?" I asked, laughing, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes. Well, I'm not gonna lie to you—I've been with a lot of women,"

"Romantically or sexually?"

"Sexually. I've had sex with a lot of girls, Ange, but I want you to know it's never meant anything. Every time I've had sex in the past, it's always just bee for the physical pleasure and whatnot,"

"Yeah, I get you. But let me guess, with me it's different, right?" I asked, chuckling a bit, trying to make my sarcasm to seem less harsh.

"Yeah, Ange, it actually is. And I know that sounds incredibly cheesy and fake and probably like every other guy out there. I'm gonna tell you right now though, I've never had sex before and had it mean something. It's never been special and it's always just been for pleasure—for sex,"

"I can't believe you've never had sex and had it mean something," I said, somewhat skeptical and yet astonished.

"Well, okay, here's the thing, the only time it ever meant anything to me was the first time I had sex with a girl. You know the shit that I went through with my uncle, so I wasn't a virgin for a long time, and knowing that, you probably understand why it hits home so much when Bobby always teases me about being gay, cus for a long time, I would wonder: 'well, what if I am gay? I'm not attracted to men, but I've only had sex with men,' and when I finally did have sex with a woman for the first time, it was not only important to me because I finally had sex with a girl for pleasure and actually experience sex as a good thing rather than a negative thing, but it also made me overcome that stigma that was placed on me at a very young age of possibly being gay. It made me realize that I really wasn't gay. So, yeah, the first time I had sex with a girl was special because of that—but every other time afterwards, it was just for fun. Fucking for pleasure and that's it. Morning would come and there would be no talking. Just get dressed and leave. There was never any special connection—nothing. Sex has always been purely physical with me—except with you, Ange. With you, it's something I've never experienced before. It scares me, because I don't know if how I feel right now, and how I felt right before we did it earlier, and how I felt during it, is normal. If feeling scared and nervous is how I'm supposed to feel. And it scares me cus I'm absolutely crazy about you—but at the same time, after having sex with you, us just talking and sharing this moment means so much to me—probably more than having the actual sex…because sex with you is different—it's something I want to share with you rather than get from you,"

By this time, I had tears in my eyes, "Jack, I had no idea," I choked out. He too, had tears in his eyes. He just smiled and wiped his eyes.

"You had no idea I was crazy about you?" he laughed as he wrapped his arms around me.

"No, I had a little bit of an idea," I laughed back, "I just had no idea about you felt about us having sex,"

"Well it's the truth. You're special to me, and therefore sex is something special to me. All of this is so new to me,"

"It's all new to me too, Jackie," I said.

"You've been in relationships before—and you've shared sex with other guys before me though,"

"Yes, but who's to say I felt the same way about them that I do for you?" I asked.

"I dunno. I just can't believe that you don't mind about my having sex with lot's of other girls,"

"Well believe it. I don't care what you did in the past—as long as you don't have any STD's or AIDs or something. But even if you did, we'd work with it. You're worth it," He smiled and kissed me.

"You don't have to worry about that shit. I may have had sex with a lotta girls, and I might have done drugs, but I was safe about it!"

"Okay, good," I laughed.

"Did you see me? I was all over those condoms before we had sex!" he laughed.

"Excuse me? I provided those condoms!" I exclaimed, still laughing.

"Well, I came prepared," he said as he reached off the bed into his pants and pulled out a string of about 10 condoms from his pocket. "See?" I just laughed at him.

"So Ange, how about you? When was your first time? He asked, finally settling back with me on the bed.

"Well, it's kind of embarrassing and I don't know if I told you otherwise before, but I lost my virginity my sophomore year of college to my boyfriend, Matt, at the time. However, my freshman year of college, my ex-boyfriend from high school at the time, Chris, and I attempted having sex over winter break. We failed miserably—he could barely get it in! So, I was an attempted sex-but-failed virgin for the rest of my freshman year until well into my sophomore year. Then, when Matt and I broke up the end of my sophomore year, Chris and I got back together during the summer before my junior year. He and I tried sex again and we succeeded. So he was pretty much the last guy I had sex with before you tonight,"

"Wow—you haven't had sex since the summer before your junior year!"

"No! Chris and I had sex a lot that year—and during the summer before senior year. We broke up like a month before going back to school—so like the last time I had sex was like…six or seven months ago, which I guess is a while ago, but it could have been worse,"

"No wonder why your friends wanted to you to get laid so badly," Jack laughed.

"Ha! Yeah really…wait, you knew about that!" I asked, shocked.

"Yeah I knew! I was only standing on the balcony! Your friends talk really loud," he laughed.

"I am SO sorry, Jack!" I exclaimed, feeling horrible about the sex bet back at school.

"No! Don't be! I thought it was funny, especially since I knew we weren't gonna have sex that night and you tried so hard,"

"What! Jack! You let me try to get you to have sex and knew all along we weren't going to!" Jack laughed even harder.

"Yeah! You know why now though—I wanted to tell you I loved you first," he said, trying to calm down a bit.

"But you could have told me earlier that night before I tried getting you into bed! Then we could have had sex that night!" I exclaimed. He just looked at me in bewilderment.

"Damn," he said, then started laughing again. I just shook my head and laughed with him.

"We're too crazy, Jack,"

"I know it. But that's why I love you,"