Roy's Birthday

Fullmetal-Alchemist10: This is when Ed goes to Roy's apartment, again. This isn't what I originally wrote because what I originally wrote was too cruel towards Ed at the end. The ending should entertain you (I hope). Also, there are random notes from me twice in the story. They are italicized and in paranthesis!

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist, if I did, no one would mistake Envy for a girl!

"Fullmetal, come to my apartment at seven o'clock tonight, okay? Remember your dress, too." Ed and Roy were in Roy's office discussing what they'll be doing at Roy's apartment tonight.

Ed crossed his arms. "Okay, as long as no one's going to be there."

"Of course no one's going to be there. Envy might randomly come, like always, but he doesn't count. Walk to my apartment in your dress, don't come and then change into it." Roy had a slightly evil plan going on in his head.

"Fine, I'll go to your apartment with the dress on. I'll just wear my jacket over it… I don't care if Envy comes because he always comes over whenever I do."

"Well, do we have everything arranged?"

"Not quite. You forgot about food." Ed was thinking about food, like always.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you, I already got the food taken care of. So you come over at seven tonight in your dress," Roy said.

"That sounds right. See ya later!" Ed walked out the door.

"He doesn't suspect a thing…" Roy thought.

Ten minutes until Ed comes over

"Okay, everyone, you all have to be quiet. Ed thinks there's no one here. All of you hide in the closet or bathroom. Don't worry I cleaned the closet," Roy announced to everyone in the room. Most of the people were from the military, but Al and Winry came, too.

"When will Ed be coming?" Riza asked Roy.

"Any minute now…" Roy smiles evilly.

There was a knock at the door. "Is everyone hidden?" Roy whispered.

There was no answer, which meant "Yes".

"Good," Roy whispered. Then he yelled to the door, "Come in!"

"Hey, Roy. It sounded like you were talking to someone. Is there someone here!" Ed hides behind a chair.

"No, it's okay. I was talking to Envy, but he just left. Want any food?" Roy hands Ed a bowl of chips.

"Chips weren't invented yet. Where did you get them?" Ed said while eating chips.

"I dunno, they just suddenly appeared." Roy then yelled, "NOW!"

Everyone burse into the room, and saw Ed in a dress. "$#! YOU SAID NO ONE WOULD BE HERE!" Ed tried to run for the door, but it was padlocked shut. He then tried to jump out the window, but then he realized he was on the third floor.

While Ed was frantically looking for an escape, Roy said, "Oh, did I say that? I meant everyone was going to be here for my party! It is my birthday, you know. I wanted some entertainment."

"WELL THAT'S JUST WONDERFUL! TOO BAD I DIDN'T GET YOU A PRESENT!" Ed said sarcastically.

"This is enough of a present, thank you. I think everyone else is enjoying it also." Roy pointed towards the people behind him laughing. Al was the only one who wasn't really laughing because he felt bad for his brother.

"You know, Roy, this isn't really nice," Al told Roy. Al was a little concerned about how long Ed could last before he would start to try and kill people.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. He might transmute something dangerous, won't he?"

Al nods. "Should I bring him back to my room? I could carry him inside me so no one else can see him."

"Yeah, you can do that, but first let's humiliate him a little more. Let's put him inside you, tell him you're going back to your room, but actually bring him outside. I bet Ed's yelling has attracted some attention to the building as it is." Roy was being positively evil.

"I think that's mean, but it is your birthday, so I'll do it." Al walks over to Ed. "Quick, hop inside me (Fullmetal: That sounded so wrong…) and I'll take you back to our room." Al opened up the chest plate to his armor.

"Good, at least someone's nice to me…" Ed hops into Al. (Fullmetal: That still sounded wrong…)

Al started walking downstairs to go outside and Ed said, "It feels like we're going downstairs. We aren't going to our room, are we?"

"We're going to our room, don't worry, and don't talk too much. People keep on thinking I'm talking to myself."

Al then got outside, quickly dumped Ed out, and ran inside. Ed was wondering were he was, and then he quickly realized he was outside.

An old lady passed by, saw Ed, screamed, and fainted. Now everyone looked at Ed since the old lady screamed. They all laughed.

Ed ran to the door and pounded on it yelling, "AL! LET ME IN! THIS ISN'T FUNNY!"

After a few minutes of Ed pounding on the door, there were screams. Al looked out to see that Ed transmuted his arm into the hand blade and was slicing the air in front of him. "Does anyone want to make fun of me anymore! I'll be glad to take some of your limbs off!" Everyone started running away except for one person. They looked oddly like the person on the train that was bold enough to call Ed short.

"The shrimp is in a dress!" the bold person yelled.

Ed then ran, full throttle at the person and jumped on top of them. "DON'T CALL ME A SHRIMP!" Ed started punching the person until Al ran out and restrained him.

"Okay, nii-san that's enough. I don't want anyone to go to the hospital because of you."

Ed snapped out of his angry state and said, "I'm hungry, can we get something to eat?"

"Sure, as soon as we get back to Roy's apartment. You might want to change back into your normal clothes, though." Al started walking with Ed back into the building, and went back up to their room so Ed could change.

After Ed had changed, they went back to Roy's party. Ed still was very angry at Roy and transmuted Roy's metal bed into a metal bat. "Batter up!" Ed swung the bat right in between Roy's legs as hard as he could.

"Call… ambulance…" Roy said before he passed out on the ground.

Ed was pretty satisfied and then called an ambulance because he knew that he hit Roy really hard. Roy was unconscious the whole way into and on the ambulance to the hospital. He eventually woke up a few hours later.

Fullmetal-Alchemist10: Don't worry Roy lovers! Roy isn't permanently damaged! I'm not mean like that! I don't want flames! The next chapter will have Ed visiting Roy at the hospital!

To the Reviewers!

Angel-of-Music1331: It's ok that you didn't review for the last chapter! I'm sorry for the unfunniness of the last two chapters!

AncientSilverYouko: I'm glad you like my story! It's not that hard to be random! I also looked up what wasabi was to see if you were correct. I found out that wasabi is a condement, but it's made from a root of the herb Eutrema wasabi. That was really what I was refering to. There are contests where they eat the root, not the condement. Also, now I have like three armies that will beafter me if I don't update...scary...