For notes, warnings and disclaimers see chapter 1

Chapter 6: Play It Again, Sam
(Janet's POV)

Okay, so this evening is not exactly going as I had hoped it would, what else is new? The way I see it the problem --or at least part of the problem-- is that this whole situation has been allowed to fester for far too long and that means that the wound may have to be reopened. That is never a pleasant thing but at the same time it is something that, as a doctor, I'm well aware is sometimes necessary and the fact that what we are dealing with here is not a physical wound is basically irrelevant.

"So maybe I'm not entirely okay with any of this but I never said I was," says Sam, glaring at me.

"And, as I've told you time and time again, no one expects you to be," I remind her.

"Really? Then if you don't expect me to be fine, why do you keep throwing the fact that I'm not okay with any of this back at me time and time again?" she shoots back.

"Because you seem to be determined to deny it," I point out.

"But I'm not denying it, I'm just refusing to over-dramatize it, there's a difference. Yes, it happened and it wasn't fun but it's over, I can't change it and I have to go on living, what else do you want me to do?"

"I don't know," I admit, realizing that she does have a point. The thing is that --regardless of whether or not she has a point-- there is a lot more to this than that. Over the years I've learned to trust my instincts and right now those instincts are telling me that Sam is not being completely honest with me. That's the problem... or maybe the problem is that I was expecting her to be completely honest with me in the first place.

"Well, neither do I," she growls.

"I'm sorry, it's just that I'm worried about you," I say, realizing that prolonging this confrontation is not likely to get me anywhere and that pushing Sam away and getting her on the defensive is not going to help matters under the circumstances.

"I know," she says, letting out a resigned sigh. "I know you are worried, I know everybody is worried but I'm fine --or at least as close to 'fine' as I can be-- just more than a little tired of people trying to 'help me'. That is precisely the reason why I didn't say anything back in the beginning."

"Is it?" I ask, knowing that that is not the whole truth.

"Well, maybe it wasn't the only reason," she reluctantly admits, "but yes, it was one of them. Good intentions can be deadly, you know?"

"Yes, well, good intentions come hand in hand with friends who care about you so I'm afraid you are just going to have to put up with us for the time being. Now, I admit that maybe I've been pushing a little too hard here but..."

"You think?" she interrupts, glaring at me.

"But if you weren't being so stubborn I wouldn't have to do quite so much pushing," I go on, almost as if she hadn't interrupted.

"So you push and I push back and then you push even harder?"

"Yes, I think that pretty much covers it," I confirm.

"Well, you can stop pushing," she growls.

"Just as soon as you stop pushing back," I challenge, even though I'm not really angry.

"In other words we are stuck?" she says with a hint of a smile and I feel myself relax, at least a little.

"Or so it seems," I add, hoping to put this whole confrontation behind us.

I may have managed to confirm some of my suspicions tonight but at the same time I know that, in doing so, I may well have pushed things a little too far. The truth is that I never expected this evening to turn into a confrontation --though I probably should have-- and right now the time has come for me to back down.

I know that even though right now my every instinct is telling me to do something, to fix this whole mess somehow, it's not going to be anywhere near that simple. Sorting out this mess is going to take time and I'm going to have to be patient... and I freely admit that being patient is not something I'm particularly good at.

The thing is that I know that --due to some rather unique circumstances-- I am in a rather awkward position here, one that is far from ideal, one that requires me to play two separate roles that are not necessarily compatible.

Due to the highly classified nature of the SGC I have no choice but to try to balance the roles of friend and doctor here and --to make matters worse-- the fact remains that this whole thing is as far as you can get from my so-called area of expertise. That leaves me with little choice but to try to improvise and walk an impossibly fine line.

The thing is that I know that under normal circumstances being a doctor has to come before being a friend. That is something I've come to accept and that is usually my first response in those instances in which I have to be one or the other... the problem is that that approach is not the best one under these highly abnormal circumstances. The simple fact is that right now Sam needs a friend a lot more than she needs a doctor. That is something I keep having to remind myself of.

There are only four people she's told what really happened in Simarka and of those four, two are not exactly people I can imagine her feeling comfortable talking to: General Hammond and Colonel O'Neill. That leaves me and Daniel to deal with the fallout... and --as close as he may be to Sam-- Daniel is still a guy and that pretty much guarantees that there are some things she won't talk to him about. That basically leaves me and that means that being there for her has to be my top priority.

Sure, I still have to keep an eye out for anything that could possibly resemble a warning sign and I still intend to look for anything I can do to help her --both as a friend and as a doctor-- but for the time being the best thing the doctor in me can do is take a back seat to the friend. In other words, maybe the time has come for us to go back to trying to do what we had originally set out to do here: watch a movie, relax and forget about the SGC and everything that goes with it --including Simarka-- for a couple of hours.

It's time for me to forget all about being a doctor and for Sam to forget all about being an Air Force Major, though I do know better than to hope she will ever allow herself to forget all about being an astrophysicist. The time has come for us to allow ourselves to be silly for a couple of hours and forget about everything else... too bad we don't have anything decent to watch.

THE END (for now)

Author's notes: Hi guys, okay, thanks for reading (and reviewing). I know this chapter doesnít really feel much like an ending, sorry about that but as I said at the end of 'Propagationí'I decided to write a series of short sequels rather than a long one. These are 'snapshot' fics and the story woní' really feel resolved until the last one is posted. Again, sorry about that,

Alec