Locked away inside my mind...my thoughts I often kept to myself. Memories I wanted forgotten.

So many-

many words

Left unsaid.

My mother. My kind mother. I loved her so much. I could hardly remember her though. Only that when she smiled at me, she loved how I reminded her of my father.

-chuckle-My father. I never knew him, but I see his face everytime I look at my reflection. I know I'm handsome but a part of me resents looking like the man who left me and my mother to die. When I think about it...I hate him. When I see him. I'll kill him myself.

My friends: Renkotsu, Jakotsu, Suikotsu, Mukotsu, Ginkotsu and Kyokotsu.

Renkotsu: Smart but always secretive. I look up to Renkotsu like an older brother even though they call me big-brother. That's weird, huh? Sometimes, I dunno where I'd be without him, although I t always seems he's hiding something from me.

Jakotsu: My best friend. He's been my partner in crime since we were kids. Sure he's weird, but loyal to me. I know I take him for granted and I'm sorry my friend.

Suikotsu: Kind but don't let his looks fool you. Still, even in his evil-state he stays a good friend to me and always back me up. I know I don't talk to him as often as I should but I'm really grateful to him.

Mukotsu: Weird little guy but stays strong til the very end. If I can count on anyone, it's Mukotsu.

Ginkotsu: Saved my ass more times than I can count. I definetly owe him my life. Without him, I wouldn't be here.

Kyokotsu: Always hungry. Which Is weird. That's probably why he's so tall. He's egotistic but fun to be around. There's never a dull moment with him.

And finally...

Kimiko. Always Kimiko. Beautiful yet deadly.Childish but sweet. like a female me.

It's been 2 1/2 months since I last saw her. Iwant to go see her, but I'm nervous.She hates me.

I want to talk to her...I want to know that she's okay but I can't.

She probably has a new Boyfriend.

"boyfriend...boyfriend..."god..now I hate that word. Was I even really her boyfriend? I never asked her but I just assumed...

Now I'm rambling.-sigh-Still...I wish to see her.

Lately...I can't stop dreaming about her.

Each time it's the same. Whenever I try to touch her...I wake up. Until last night.

Kimiko stood at the crossroads,unsure of which path to take. She gazed out into the world; where the twilight met the azure sea. She stared into the distance like it held her future.

I crept towards, seemingly floating ona cushion of air. I called her name. Reluctantly, she titled her head slightly to face me.

I swam in her extrodinarily deep eyes. They wereSensuous ,yet held a certain naivette-that I found so attractive. They were even more alluring up close.

She was so...raw, so mysterious. Then I began to felt like I did when we first met her. (My mouth dried, my chest tightened. My body feeling heated, wondering how fast I could have her body screaming for me) Now it's different.

It's hard waking up and remembering she's not right next to me.

Now we were close. Only 3 feet seperated us. I stepped behind and held her body close to mine in a tight embrace. Her back arched my chest as I kissed the side of her neck.

Until now, I was unable to touch her. There was so much I wanted to say to her. 'I'm sorry for letting you down','I'm sorry for the death of our un-born child.',' I'm sorry...for all the pain I put you through.'

"Kimiko.." I exhaled, " I wanted to hold you for so long. It's been almost 3 months since I saw you last."

Kimi twisted around in my arms." Bankotsu..." She pressed her breast to my chest and stared up at me with sad eyes, " Onegai...stop."

"No. Let me stay with you. Just for now."

"But don't you see?" Tears misted in her eyes, " This isn't real. It's only a dream, an illusion."

"I don't care." I tried to kiss her. She placed her hand to my lips.

"Was our love like this? nothing but a fleeting illusion?"

"NO! How can you say that! I loved you more than-"

"More than what? How can you love me when you've never been loved."

"I have been loved. by you. And I loved you."

She cried." If you loved me...why did you leave me? You always break that promise to me. You all did. You guys promised to never leave me and you did!"

"No! Kimi, it's not like that."

"My father said that we were forbidden. For...otherwordly reasons.Still, we came across on another. Fate that tried to seperate us but it was you who did it. "

I couldn't say anything. It was like my body was frozen. Kimi unwrapped my arms from around her and stood at the fork in the road-the crossroads.

I couldn't control my body. I headed down the left path and she headed down the right. We faced each other on last time.

"I'm thinking of you. Always. We pray for a release from this pain.That's why we took seperate paths."

I could only stare helplessly at her.

"Who knows," She giggled, "Maybe a new journey won't be so bad. Maybe it's already begun. We both shared one mind. One body and one soul. The same soul. The same destiny. "

"Then why do we seek seperate paths?" A gentle wind swept down the road. Tossing my hair in the wind as well as kimi's.

"The roads of life run together. Who knows what we'll find when the paths meet."

"But I don't understand!" The wind picked up as Kimiko started running towards the distance.

"You will.I'll come with new winds. Wait for me! I love you!"

Her voice echoed into nothingness as she faded away...my dream came crashing down.

I opened my eyes and I was back in the real world. I had fallen asleep sitting cross-legged on a huge boulder. That dream. I yawned.

"Did you have a nice nap?"

"Jaki?"

Jakotsu grinned at me," It's kinda chilly out. We should get going. Winter will be here soon."

I stretched my arms. That's right. It's autumn." Where does the time go?"

"Beats me. I'm ready for the snow."

"I bet you are." We both laughed as I slided down the side of the rock. Jakotsu handed my Banryu to me.

"How the hell can you carry this? It weighs a ton and you make it look so easy!"

"It's a secret. For now, let's head back. You know how Renkotsu is when we walk off alone without saying anything."

"He's such a tight-ass."

I blurted out laughing. I couldn't help it, Jaki was funny sometimes. Pretty soon we both were laughing.

I'm thinking of you. Always my love.

I whirled around. A gentle wind passed me by."Kimiko?" I said to myself. I could've sworn I heard her voice just now.

"Aniki?" Jaki tapped my shoulder," You hungry? I'm in the mood for Ramen."

I grinned, " You always want Ramen."

"Ramen is good. They have chicken, beef, shrimp, miso.." As we walked, Jaki counted off the different flavor of ramen on his fingers. Not that it wasn't interesting but...I had other things on my mind.

-words-

Onegai-please