looks around guiltily Okay, I'm a horrible, horrible person. I haven't updated for three months. But fear not! All is well and crazy-free in the land of me, so there will be regular updates from now on, I promise! Also, I changed my pen name because I was getting slightly sick of my old one – it was a tad unoriginal. Okay, so now that's all out of the way, on with the next chapter!
Disclaimer: Must I continue to painfully remind myself that these characters are not mine? I do? Well, okay. They're not. There, I said it.
Notes: The lyrics contained in this chapter are from the excellent song "Storm" by Lifehouse.
Chapter 12 – Chaos
7:30am
Luka walked through the ambulance bay to the ER entrance, trudging gamely amongst the puddles left from the previous night's rain. He lifted his coffee cup to his lips and immediately wished he hadn't. The liquid had grown cold and bitter during his slow walk to County, leaving him with no choice but to toss it despondently in the direction of a nearby bin. He barely registered that it missed by inches.
"I think you're losing your touch," a familiar voice called, forcing his head up.
Abby sat on the steps before him, cigarette in one hand. She looked exhausted, her coat rumpled and hair tousled. She smiled wanly at him as he approached.
"Double shift?" Luka asked, taking in her dishevelled appearance.
"Don't I know it," she affirmed, stifling a yawn. "I told Susan that if I didn't sit down for just a few minutes, I might fall over. We had a big MVA come in at around 3 o'clock this morning. That was a blast." She flicked ash from the end of her cigarette and brought it to her lips. "Neela and Ray are about ready to crash, too."
Luka tried to smile, but his heart wasn't really in it.
Abby noticed. "Is everything okay?" she asked, eyeing him closely.
"Mmm-hmm." Luka tried to avoid her gaze. She knows me too well. "Just tired. Rough night, you know?" He tried to sound light-hearted. "I guess I'll see you later?"
Abby nodded, not looking convinced. Turning on his heel, he walked up the steps and through the doors before she could quiz him further.
Luka strode through triage, sweeping his gaze over those already waiting. Fantastic, he thought. Looks like half of Chicago decided they were too sick for work today.
Heading in the direction of the lounge, he was momentarily distracted by a loud British voice as he walked past admit. Looking up, he saw Neela and Ray rifling through charts, deep in conversation.
"I don't mind you guys practising," Neela was saying, sounding supremely frustrated. "It's just when you're still going at two o'clock in the bloody morning…! Oh, good morning, Doctor Kovac," she said, flushing slightly when she saw him pass.
Ray rolled his eyes at Luka as if to say, "can you believe this?" Luka managed to muster a small grin and a shake of his head before leaving them to it.
Continuing down the hall and into the lounge, Luka breathed a sigh of relief. Well, today is going to be just great, he thought sarcastically as he pulled open his locker. He shed his jacket and shoved it inside, replacing it with his white lab coat. Hanging his stethoscope loosely around his neck, he closed the locker door with more force than was probably necessary and left the room.
When he returned to admit, he noticed that Neela and Ray had left. Susan was now standing in their place, chatting wearily to Jerry. A stack of charts was balanced precariously in her hands.
"Luka!" she exclaimed when she saw him approach. "Is everything okay? I tried calling your place last night, but there was no answer. What happened? Did you guys find Alex?"
"No," Luka told her, gripping the edge of the bench.
Susan visbly paled. "My God, why are even here? Isn't there something you can do?"
"Not really," he replied hollowly. "The police basically said that all we can do is wait. Sam isn't on today, so she's at… she's at home by the phone." Luka did not want to go into the details of their… hell, he didn't even know. Fight? Breakup? Trial separation? God, it's like a horrible episode of Dr. Phil. "Honestly, I just need something to keep my mind off it." His thoughts turned to Carter, remembering how he had thrown himself into his work in an effort to forget the loss of his and Kem's baby.
Susan exhaled sharply. "I understand," she told him, placing the charts on the bench. "But are you sure you're alright?" she asked, peering closely at him.
"Never said I was alright," Luka responded flatly. "So what have we got?" He turned from her to the admit board and stared hard at it, gamely trying to ignore her concern.
It'll swallow you whole.
Susan sighed, realizing she was getting nowhere. She followed his gaze to the board. "There's a guy with shortness of breath in three," she told him carefully.
Luka nodded his assent and left.
4:00pm
How
long have I been in this storm?
So
overwhelmed by the ocean's shapeless form
Water's
getting harder to tread
With these waves crashing over my
head…
Ray approached admit, tossing a chart down. "Man," he groaned to no one in particular. "I'm wiped."
"Only half an hour to go, though, right?" Abby asked, joining him.
"That's right," Ray winked at her. "I've got a date."
"Just as long as she walks and talks, right?" Susan volleyed as she scribbled something on a chart.
"She doesn't have to talk," Ray grinned, prompting a groan from Abby.
From his position in front of the computer, Jerry hung up the phone. "Got a homeless pickup coming," he reported.
"Yay," Abby remarked dryly.
"I've got it," Luka volunteered, turning on his heel and preparing to head to the ambulance bay.
"Abby, there's a girl with an ACL injury in six. Ray, you can help Luka," Susan told them without looking up.
"But Neela – " Ray started.
"But nothing. Neela's busy trying to get a psych consult," Susan informed him, lifting her head. "Just do it." Her eyes twinkled with mischief.
Grumbling under his breath, Ray followed Luka out into the ambulance bay.
"So," said Ray, trying to make small talk as they waited. "I haven't seen Sam around. She got the day off?"
"Yeah," Luka replied, shoving his hands in his pockets. Trying to change the subject, he asked, "How's your band going? You play guitar, right?"
"Right," Ray answered, warming to the topic. "It's going good. We have another gig at The Shelter Club tomorrow night."
Luka was unfamiliar with the place, but nodded nonetheless. A siren trilled and he looked up, seeing the expected ambulance peel into the bay. He darted over to it, Ray following close behind.
When he reached the vehicle, the back doors opened. Jumping out, the EMT acknowledged them both and began to pull the gurney out. As it landed on the ground, Luka glanced down at the patient and felt everything in him freeze.
Alex's deathly pale face stared back at him, his eyes closed. There were bruises around his forehead and his breathing was impossibly shallow.
Luka tried to take a breath but couldn't. As he and Ray pushed the gurney across the bay, the EMT at their heels, he felt like he was moving in slow-motion. He couldn't think. He couldn't speak. The EMT's words sounded like they were being spoken underwater.
"10-year-old John Doe. Pulse 120, resps 50 and climbing. BP 85 over 50. BSL is 550. Mild head trauma. Suspected diabetic ketoacidosis."
They burst through the doors of the ER. He could hear Ray calling his name, but just barely.
"Luka. Luka! LUKA! Isn't this Sam's kid?"
Sam. Alex. Sam's at home. Oh, God.
Luka felt his head snap up and look at Ray, his vision clearing. The young doctor's eyes were filled with worry. Luka nodded and began to push the gurney with renewed speed. The EMT left them to it and dashed back outside.
As they passed admit, he saw Susan, who was still checking charts. "Which trauma room is open?" he snapped at her.
Susan looked up at him, then looked down at the gurney. She gasped. "Luka, isn't that…"
"Yes, goddammit. Which trauma room?"
Regaining her composure, Susan darted out from behind the desk. "Trauma two," she told him. "Jerry!" she barked over her shoulder. "Find Chuny and Haleh and tell them to get to Trauma two, now. Ray, you can handle triage with Abby, Pratt, Neela and the students. Until your shift ends, anyway." She started to run beside the gurney with Luka. "Tell Pratt we may need him later. I'm supposed to see Weaver in half an hour."
"And call Sam! Now!" Luka told him. Jerry snatched up the phone and began to dial.
Luka looked down at Alex as they raced down the hall. Please God, hang in there.
I won't live through this again.