Disclaimer: I don't any of these humanimals.

(I know most of you call them mobians, but I prefer humanimals. So there.)

Yeeha! I got more reviews! Go L.A. Go L.A. It's ya birthday. It's ya birthday. No seriosly. It is today!

So I'm doing the request of what pretty much all of you requested. Yippee!

Oh and...It'll get a little weird later on...

Talk Show #5

Cameras On

Announcer: "Gooooooooooood evening, Rreeaders! Welcome back to LonelyArtist's Talk Show! Today's topic: Rouge the Bat! What's her heritage? What is her future? Why is she so se--" "THIS IS RATED K!" "--I mean drop dead gorgeus? That and more on today's episode! And now, let's hear a hearty welcome to your host, LonelyArtist!"

((applause))

An over-confident LonelyArtist waltzes onstage. Today she wears a black cape over her normal clothes. Before sitting down, she throws off the cape, which flutters down in a heap behind her chair. She sits down and looks at the audience.

"I'm very sorry for all that, but I just got a theatrical flair. It also might have been because of the Careers class I just got done with. We took this personality test, and it said I was slightly introverted. Which means mildly shy. ME! SHY! So I've just been trying to prove it wrong. Yeah. Anyway, my usual announcements: I forgot to go to band practice today, and, if you haven't noticed, I got new glasses! Don't they look rad?"

A tomato splats on her face. "You're still as ugly as ever!"

L.A. frowns and yells, "Grab that man, and...throw him out the third story window! Oh wait. K+. Put a mattress under it!" Two flying robot...things...flew out of nowhere, swooping down, grabbing a member of the audience, and flying off with him. A scream is heard. "Okay. That was the wrong person, it wasn't even a man, but...I think it got the point across. Anyway! Please welcome our guest of honor, Rouge the Bat!"

((applause))

Rouge flies on stage with a flourish and lands elegantly on the armchair. "Thank you! Thank you!" she cries to the audience. "Stick around after the show and I will personally steal your valuables!" The crowd cheers louder. Rouge tosses her head in a seductive kind of way, making a few men in the audience drop.

L.A. waits til the crowd calms down. "I see you've got quite a fan base, Rouge."

"Well who couldn't, if they had my personality?"

"I'm sure it's not your personality..." L.A. murmers.

"What did you say?" Rouge asks innocently. "I didn't hear."

"Never you mind. Anyways, I've always wondered this, but...you have no hair..."

Rouge's smile fades. "Do you know how many times I get asked that a day?"

L.A. blinks. "No. How much?"

"Never."

L.A. blinks again. If she liked anime, there would have been a sweat drop, but I think the animators have learned their lesson. "Okay. That takes care of the first question..." she says, not wanting to go into more insane ramblings. "Okay. So...next question?"

"Next question." Rouge says, cheered up a bit.

"Good. What's your heritage?"

"Well, I'm a vampire bat, as it shows from the fangs. Mostly so, actually. But I'm a bit human. My great great great great times whatever grandmother was an Aztec. That's where I get my drop dead self. Right boys?"

A few hoo-hahs, cheers, whistles, and swooning sounds are heard from the audience.

L.A. however, is intrigued. "Aztec? Wow! That must be where you get your love for jewels! I don't have any special blood in me. I've got stuff like Swedish and Irish, but that's as exotic as it gets. But Aztec? Hmm...isn't Knuckles Mayan?"

"I dunno."

"Well, Tikal is his tribe girl...and Tikal was a mayan city. Maybe...anyway, do you think maybe your ancestors could have met up with Knuckles' ancestors, and you're, like, destined to either kill eachother or fall madly in love?"

"Madly in love?" Rouge draws back. "You mean with eachother, or just, madly in love with somebody?"

L.A. thinks. "I don't know," she says in a far away voice. "You make me think," she tells Rouge. "I like to think. Give me a minute." L.A. leans back in her chair and stares at the ceiling. She starts muttering things, and a few sound like math problems. She finally leans back. "Just with any old person." She informs Rouge.

Rouge nods. "Then yes," she says. "Definately destined."

"Awesome." L.A. nods slowly.

"It is quite radical, yes," Rouge says, a bit confused.

"Okay, so what do you have planned for your future?"--rapid change of subject

Rouge scrunches up her face in thought. "Probably go on treasure hunting for another ten years or so. Then maybe I'll slow down and start a family or something. Have a few bat children. It's so hard to find male bats nowadays though..."

"Could you crossbreed?" L.A. asks, interested.

Rouge nods. "It's possible, but sometimes it gets miscaried or deformed or something."

L.A. by now is truly into this topic. "That's cool. So what do you plan on doing if you can't find a male bat?"

Rouge shrugs. "Marry somebody else, steal his stuff, run off, and adopt a kid."

L.A. is amazed. "Somebody with something you want?"

"How could I find an adoptable kid with something I want?"

L.A. shakes her head. "No. I mean a husband with something you want."

Rouge laughs. "Of course!"

"How about the master emerald."

"Now why would I marry the master emerald!"

L.A. is silent for a while.

Rouge gets it. "NO! I will never even think of getting close to that thing! Knuckles is an enemy, nothing more."

Out in the audience, the heart of a red echidna breaks. It makes the sound of a vase that nobody was around to hear. Sad, but nearly inaudible.

Rouge hears this. Her eyes widen. She goes to the front of the stage with a look of deep guilt and remorse, searching for her loved one. "No..." she says to the audience. "No, Knuckles..."

But it is too late. With a cry of anguish, Knuckles falls over and dies.

"STOP!" L.A. yells. "Whoever wrote this script, is fired!"

"Sorry, boss!" says Guess Who.

"Guess Who! What are you doing working for me? Where's Coke48kenshin?"

"You fired her remember?" yells Guess Who.

L.A. frowns. "Oh. Well, you're fired, Guess Who. Tell Hiei's-lover-16 that she's hired, and tell Coke48kenshin that she's fired again."

"Will do, boss!" Guess Who salutes.

"I hate those optimists. Anyway, rewind!"

"!dniwer,yawynA.stsimitpoesohtetahI".setulasohWssiuG"!ssob,dolliW"".naigaderifs'eshtahtnihsnek84ekoClletdna,derihs'hestaht61-revol-s'ieiHlleT.ohWsseuG,derifer'uoy,lleW.hO".snworf.A.L.ohWssueGslley"?rebmemerrehderifouY""?nihsnek84ekoCs'erehW?emrofgnikrowgnioduoyeratahW!ohWsseuG".ohWsseuGsyas"!ssob,yrroS""!derefsi,tpircssihtetorwreveohw".slley.A.L."!POTS".seiddnarevosllafselkcunK,hsiuganfoyrcahtiW.etalootsitituB"...selkcunK,oN".ecneiduaehtotsyasehs"...oN".enodevolrehrofgnihcraes,esromerdnatliugpeedfokoolahtiwegatsehtfotnorfehtotseogehS.nediwseyereH.sihtsraeheguoR.elbiduaniylraentub,daS.raehotdnuorasawydobonthatgnihsarcesavafodnuosehtsekamtI.skaerbandihcaderafotraeheht,ecneiduaehtnituO

The first reviewer who finds an error wins...um...three imaginary dollars! And maybe a feature in another one of my stories/chapters...

See those three stars up the page a ways? That's where the rewinding begins.

So Knuckles wasn't in the audience, his heart doesn't break, Rouge doesn't get guilty, and Knuckles doesn't die.

"Okay, so now we have to wing it, Rouge. Why is Knuckles just an enemy?" L.A. asked "symphathetically." That's a really hard word to spell.

Rouge shrugs. "Well. I guess rival, really. We don't despise eachother like we used to. But we have no...um...feeling...for eachother. Or at least I don't for him."

"Okay," L.A. nods. "Fair enough. Let's see...next question...CRAP! I can't think of a question! Um...Ooh! What are your favorite kinds of jewels?"

Rouge raises an eyebrow. "It took you that long to think of that? Anyway...my favorite jewel...I'd have to say sapphires...I love the blue. It reminds me..."

"Reminds you of what? The ocean? The lake? The sky? A puddle? Food dye? Knuckles' eyes? Rib--" Ribbons

Rouge shoots up. "It's not Knuckles' eyes! Why do you keep bringing him up!"

L.A. blinks. "Well, gee, I was gonna say Tails' eyes a little later...and then maybe later my eyes, too!" She grins a toothy grin.

Rouge blushes. "Oh...sorry I got so worked up..."

"S'okay."

Just then, the stage door bursts open, and there stands Knuckles.

"Aaaauugh!" L.A. screams. "Knuckles! What are you doing here? I have a show to run! Stay out! Rewind rewind rewind!"

"Sorry, boss, no can do!" Hiei's-lover-16 shouts. "We're running out of tape! If we rewind again, we may not be able to continue!"

L.A. sulks. "Hiei's-lover, you're fired. Man, I'm running out of employees here."

Hiei's-lover bursts out laughing as she walks out the door.

L.A. groans. "Why does she think I'm funny? She always thinks I'm funny!" she asks No-One in Particular.

No-One screams, "Why are you asking me? I live in Particular for gosh sake! How would I know!"

L.A. smiles sheepishly. "Sorry. Anyway, Knuckles, Rouge, carry on."

"And what makes you think I'm involved!" Rouge yells.

L.A. shrugs. "I'm psychic."

Rouge grumbles as L.A. leans back in her chair and puts her hands behind her head. "What do you want, Knucklehead?"

Knuckles smiles into the camera. "Well, I was just watching this show, and I remembered that I had lost a bet with Sonic and still had to humiliate myself on national fanfics. So I came over here to do so."

L.A. nods. "Go ahead. I could use the publicity."

Knuckles nods nervously. He walks up to Rouge and kneels before her. "Rouge the Bat! Will you marry me!"

Dead...Silence.

Then people start to react. L.A. chokes on her chewing gum. The audience does a hodgepodge New vocabulary word for your kids, moms. It means "an assortment of unlike items; a jumble." of things. Most of the women put their hands to their hearts and say, "Aww." Though some react with hoots shouts, and jealousy if they liked Knuckles like I do. The men hooted, yelled, and some cried if they liked Rouge like every male does.

Knuckles almost faints with embarrassment.

And Rouge. Rouge squeels with delight and yells, "YES!"

Knuckles gets up. "See Sonic!" He yells into the cameras. "I told you she'd say no--------wait...YES!" He spins around and faces Rouge, wide-eyed.

Rouge nods eagerly. Her fangs show because she's smiling so much. "Yes, Knuckles! YES!"

Knuckles groans and sinks down onto the floor. "Man," he whispers."What do I do now?" He gets up and says to Rouge, "Rouge, maybe you don't know, but we're still under 18..."

L.A. groans and puts her head on her desk.

Rouge is still smiling. "So? We can wait! I'll wait for you forever."

Knuckles appears to be thinking. But he shakes his head. "But college Rouge? I don't know about you, but I'm going to need and education to make a living."

Rouge frowns just a little bit. "No you won't! I'd make lots of money if I sold all the jewels that I accumulate! And you're tons more important than all the jewels in the world!"

Knuckles gags a little. He goes over to the desk and taps L.A.'s head. She looks up. The cameras zoom into their whispering. "I can't break the poor girl's heart." Knuckles whispers. "But watching this episode, I could have sworn that she hated me!"

L.A. nods. "Well, she's a much better liar than you were episode one. You love her too."

Knuckles blushes. "Yeah but...marriage? I'm still 16! I don't even have a ring!"

L.A chuckles softly. She digs around in her desk for a moment and brings out a tiny saphire ring. She hands it to Knuckles. "It's my birthstone," she whispers softly. "You can borrow it, but I expect at least a plastic one back."

Knuckles sighs in relief. "Thank you," he whispers, squeezing her hand in gratitude.

When he turns around, Rouge's eyes are blazing. Knuckles steps back, toppling over the desk and into L.A.'s lap. L.A. coughs out something inaudible because of Knuckles' tremendous weight, even if it was muscle.

Rouge stands up and yanks Knuckles off her. She slaps him in the face. "Don't think I didn't hear a word you said!" She points to her ears. "Think these ears are just for decoration! I'm blind without them!" Fact: All bats, except fruit bats, are blind. They see with inaudible sound waves bouncing off obstacles. She slaps him again. "You really didn't want to marry me! You just wanted to be in another fanfic!"

Knuckles rubs his cheek. "Didn't I say at the beginning that I was just here to humiliate myself?"

That wasn't the right thing to say. Rouge roars. "You wanted to humiliate yourself! As in...marrying me would mortify you!" Rouge punches him in the face, and Knuckles falls to the ground. But only momentarily. He jumps up and gives her a slug in the stomach. Rouge cripple over.

Knuckles, breathing a little extra because of the shock, walks over to the silently crying Rouge. He picks her up in his arm. He says to her, "Now that you've calmed down, I didn't mean it like that. I'm just really not ready. Okay?" This doesn't have the desired effect, and Rouge bites him in the neck.

"Oh no!" Knuckles cries. "I'm turning into a vampire bat! Just like a vampire! Noooo!" A minute later, Knuckles flies off into the night with his newly grown wings, followed by his master, Rouge.

L.A. sighs. She looks at her audience, which has since become nonexistant. She looks at the broken furnisher, the papers scattered in the audience's hasty retreat. She sighed once more, and walked off the stage.

Cameras Off

Yep. Told you it'd get weird. I didn't even finish the rest of the questions.

Anyway, there's one more episode left! Whoever, like I said, finds the first error in the rewind, will be a character in the finale! If they consent, of course. As for requests, I'm not taking any! I already have it planned who I'm going to do. Will it actually be Sonic for once? Or will I skip him completely and work on slightly more abstract characters, like Eggman or Metal Sonic? Only time will tell!

Oh yeah. Sorry I haven't written in a while. It was my birthday recently, and I got The Sims 2 Nightlife, which is an awesome game! I've been playing that. So yeah. Sorry.