Chapter Nine: Caring, Sharing and Bathroom Doors.

The next few days passed in a slight awkwardness yet Abby still continued to stay with Carter. She wasn't going to abandon him now, no mater how rough the going would get, she just couldn't. It was late on Thursday evening and despite rather being any where else in the world she was sat in a draughty church hall surrounded by fellow ex-alcoholics, with Carter sitting just to her left.

"Would anyone else like to share?" the main speaker, who was stood at the front of the hall asked.

Steadily Carter raised a hand, "I will."

Abby tried not to look too stunned. Carter never really like this part of the meetings but now here he was willingly getting up in front of a room full of strangers to talk about the fact he had a problem. Well that's what Abby hoped he was going to talk about.

Shuffling slightly nervously Carter coughed before beginning. "Hey. Well some of you might remember me I used to come to this meeting quite regularly but I gradually phased it out. I'm John Carter, and I'm back because I relapsed. That's it really, things got tough and I went seeking a way out and decided a bottle of owners was the right way to do it. I had been clean for about five years until then, now I'm back to square one. I thought life couldn't get any worse but I was wrong, what happened after trying to kill myself was worse than anything I've ever experienced. However I am incredibly lucky as I have great friends and colleagues who were there to pick me back up until I could stand on my own two feet. They helped me realise that no matter how bad things get drugs and alcohol just make it a damn site worse. So now I have been clean for a total of five days, and that's pretty much it."

The meeting carried on for a few minutes longer but Carter was the last one to share for the evening. Driving home together Abby couldn't contain herself.

"I thought you hated sharing?"

"Yeah but it needed to be done."

"Was that for my benefit?"

"Partly" answered Carter keeping his eyes glued to the road ahead. "Right were here." He cut out the engine and clambered out before Abby could question him any further. It had been a long day at work and an even longer night.

Persistently Abby followed him, she had to talk to him, so she wasn't going to let a little thing like him locking himself in the bathroom stand in her way. As soon as they arrived in the house Carter promptly entered the bathroom and he had been locked in there for around half an hour just trying to escape. He would rather have been in any other room but since it was the only room in

the house with a lock on the door it was the only room he could guarantee privacy, or so he though. Pacing around Abby pondered over ways to lure him out so she could talk to him; however none of them seemed to work. Not even the double chocolate and caramel cake she had lied about. Fed up of trying to work out how to tempt him out of there she slumped down, her head resting on the door frame. If the mountain won't come to Mohammed, Mohammed goes to the mountain.

"Look Carter we need to talk." Abby insisted hissing through the pine.

Carter sighed fed up already of listening to her. "No Abby we don't need to talk. It's been a hard day, you need to go and relax and leave me to relax!"

"Okay, okay. Correction, I need to talk, you need to listen and this damned door aren't gunna get it the way. Got it?" She paused for a moment allowing her to collect her thoughts. "Carter I can't deal with this right now. I agreed to help you as a friend because you mean a hell of a lot to me. I can't be any more than that, no matter how much any of us might want that. My life has been on a permanent hold for as long as I can remember. You need to keep going and to move on, you can't do that with me. This just wouldn't work Carter."

The door she was leaning on swung violently open causing Abby to go sprawling across the bathroom floor as she fell through the open doorway, since the door was no longer supporting her.

"How do you know that Abby? Tell me. How do you know it wont work?" Carter almost pleaded with her. Kneeling down to help her up, he gazed deep into her eyes searching for a sign... of anything

From her half lying position on the floor she gazed up into his eyes, the answer was quite simple, or so it seemed. "Because it's just temptation, wanting what you can't have. Just temptation."

But was it? Are temptation and love different, or is temptation just an excuse to avoid love? Or maybe, just maybe, you cannot have one without the other.