Session Six : Silent Tears

It was all a blur. The funeral. The tears. The isolation. Everything. Everything was a blur except...

Faye shook her head. She was walking, Spike by her side, Ed on the other, Ein even tagged along, back to the Bebop that was parked atop an almost nonexistent lake. It was painful walking like that. It felt like they were just abandoning him.Jet was gone and they were just walking away from him? Faye fought back the tears. She couldn't believe she still had some of those left.

"Faye? Faye?" Ed tugged on her dress. She was wearing the navy blue dress Jet had forced her to model the day of the bounty. Faye felt she owed it to him, knowing deep down inside Jet thought that dress looked nice on Faye. And it did, even as it was now, dyed black as if trying to darken the tragedy away. Faye gave Ed a sad smile, one that was received from her as well.

Turning back to the sidewalk, Faye kept her head down. It's Spike that worries me... Unwillingly, she recalled the past days since Jet's death. Spike would hardly speak, move, or do anything. He would just sit on the yellow couch staring at the table with the deck of cards in front of him. On one occasion Faye found him asleep and clutched within his right hand was the ace of spades. Wincing at the sight of that card, Faye immediately took it away from him and tore it in half. Spike never seemed to miss it.

But what he did at the funeral...

Faye bit her lower lip to prevent the cry of agony that seemed to be growing in her throat. He was so helpless. He was a child. There weren't that many people at the funeral, just some cop friends Jet knew and a familiar face from a beautiful woman who cried almost as much as Faye herself. But Spike...

She had to pry him away from the coffin that contained Jet's body. Most of the tears she shed were aimed at Spike. She never knew Spike loved him so much...his friend. She was torn at the fact that such a strong, laid back man such as Spike could collapse into such a pathetic, soggy state. No, it wasn't pathetic. It was human. Faye had wanted to get past his mask of confidence, and she did. She finally saw a side of Spike she so longed for but...she didn't want to see it like this.

"I'm going in for a drink in here," mumbled Spike. His words were almost unheard and uttered in a low toned mush but Faye heard them well. He was inside the pub before she could protest. Turning towards Ed and Ein she instructed, "Ed, go back to the Bebop, okay? We'll be there in a little while."

Ed didn't move. She hesitated before talking. "Is it alright for Ed to walk around town? Ein wants to see the sights and Ed wants to too."

Faye sighed. Guess it's okay. Might actually get her mind off this. She's too young for shit like this. A cracked smile crossed her lips. "Just be careful Ed."

Spike was already seated on an isolated, wooden table when Faye entered, an empty glass in front of him. She quickly strided over to him and sat next to him.

"Spike? Spike, please," she spoke.

"Go away, Faye," he mumbled in the same undecipherable tone that only Faye seemed to understand.

"No," she firmly stated. "You need to go away. Get away from here. It's not healthy."

"Since when do you worry about my health. In fact, since when is alcohol considered unhealthy by you?"

This was the longest conversation they've had in days.

Faye sighed and turned away the waiter that came for her order. "Well I'm staying here until you're ready to go home."

"Fine by me," Spike spoke in a louder, fuller tone than before.

And stay she did in their silent isolation. What intrigued Faye the most was that despite all the drinks Spike had, he seemed to keep a straight face and, although positive he was intoxicated, showed no sighs of that either. He finally stood, tall and straight as a board. Faye stood with him and after paying their tab, walked out the door to the Bebop.

Darkness had eclipsed across the sky, inking out most of the world. Faye's thoughts wandered towards Ed, hoping she was safe and back at the Bebop but knowing that girl, she may not come till the next day. Or the day after that for all she knew.

Faye's thoughts were answered when she found the Bebop dark and alone. That meant they had to spend the night there. No problem they all needed that. And besides, if they needed to Jet's grave was nearby.

Spike's loud plop on the yellow couch brought Faye back to reality. She placed her hands on her hips and glared at him. "You're not sleeping there again tonight. Go to your own room. You're a mess, Spike!"

"Why the hell should you care?"

It seemed as if something inside Faye was cut and let loose. "Because I'm worried about you!" she blurted out. "I care! Spike, please! You have to pull yourself together! I hate seeing you like this!"

Spike threw his head back towards the couch. "Fuck off."

Faye literally gasped as his words. Tears stung her eyes. No, no more of that...please. "Well, I'm sorry for caring about you, Spike Spiegel. You're just a selfish bastard! You fuckin' moron." She crossed her arms around her chest.

"I don't give a damn. It's my fault he died anyway..."

Faye didn't seem to catch his last few words, collapsing into his. The crushing weight that he didn't care about her was beyond suffocation. "I just wish you would at least...consider me sometimes. I mean..." she trailed off. "Here I am worried about you, caring about you and you don't even give me the time of day. Or night for that matter."

Spike's vision was still towards the ceiling, eyes following the lazy cycle of the fan. He heard Faye's frustrated cry. She was really starting to irritate him.

"Spike! Please! Would you at least just look at me!"

Go away, Faye. I don't think I can control myself any longer. I don't want you to get hurt...

She sat next to him. He still wouldn't budge.

"Spike?" she continued to try.

"Go away, Faye..." Spike mumbled. Before you get hurt.

Faye gave up. "Fine then! But don't come crying to me when you want to get fed! Just remember Jet's not here to give us any free rides anymore!"

She shouldn't have said that. In fact, she knew before it came out of her mouth but she still blurted it out and mentally kicked herself for doing so. How could she say something like that? Even though it wasn't much of an insult towards anyone's behalf, it was a dirty punch towards Spike considering the state of being he was currently agonizing in.

His head snapped up and he faced her. All his sorrow gone, hatred was woven in his features. Even his eyes seemed to burn. He violently grabbed her wrist. "What did you say?"

Faye's eyes widened. "I...I didn't mean...I'm sorry!"

Spike grabbed her other wrist with strength that surprised her. He painfully twisted it behind her back. No...Faye...You didn't get away...I can't stop myself...

Pushing her back towards the sofa, Spike managed to hold her arms over her head, holding both her wrists in an iron grip within his left hand. He stared at her with a twisted face that scared her beyond any comprehension.

"Spike..." she coughed. "It hurts...please stop...!"

His grip tighten. "You said you wanted attention from me, didn't you? Well, I'm giving it to you now, aren't I? Or do you want more?"

"Spike..."

"More?"

"Nuh...No..."

Hatred of some sort coursed through Spike. "More, huh?" He began to violently pull of the buttons from her dress, exposing her chest and bra. His strength frightened her. She was unable to move from his weight under her and the grip he held on her wrists. He ran a finger down the outline of her neck and into her bra. "Is this enough attention, Faye!"

Hot tears ran down her face as she tried in vain to get away.

"Answer me, Faye!"

She couldn't.

I'm so sorry Faye...!

dum, dum, duuuuuummmmmm! Oh crap! I can't believe I just did that to poor Faye! But don't worry! I am a Spike/Faye fan, so we'll get through this...somehow...heh! Well, as always THANK YOU! for everything, especially those of you that have kept up with my story. OH, almost forgot... next chapter is gonna have lemon action. Well actually it's more toned down...like lime... well actually, it's not gonna be all that bad so might as well call it lemonade...heh. Well if you have any problems with that, just tell me, okay?

Well, thanks again, later!