HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!! I told you I wouldn't post until January. I'd been really messed up with that cold; I was barely been able to work. I barely even made it to the New Year's Eve party! But I recovered in time, and now I'm back to writing.
To answer Jane and Adam's question, Jane and Adam (J) became a couple in my fic at exactly the same time they became a couple in the TV series. Keep in mind that I began writing this starting off last season's "Jump" episode, but since it's a very long fic and I don't want you or me to get bored of it, I decided I would constantly be adapting the chapters of my fic to the series as new episodes come along (you can tell that from several parts of my story, like the inclusion of the late Judith Montgomery at the end of last chapter, or the mention of Iris and the White Stripes concert, or Helen being the art teacher, and so on). Also take into consideration that this is supposed to be Joan's senior year, when in the series she's actually a junior. The problem, as you posed it, is that I had already started this fic as if, originally, Joan and Adam weren't together as a couple (yet), but since in the series they eventually became a couple, and I am adapting this fic to the series, magically (or miraculously) wham!! they are a couple.
Whew! That was a long explanation.
However, I cannot leave this like it is, because that would be just a very easy way to weasel myself out of this imminent plot-hole. So now I have to thank you for pointing this out. I have thought up a (hopefully) good way to fix it, so as to make my story plausible, and still keep this fic par with the happenings of the series. Read on and you'll see. Thank you, Jane and Adam! Hope you like this chapter, I wrote it especially for you.
Disclaimer: I wish I owned Joan Of Arcadia, but I don't. However, I own pretty much everything else in this fic.
Chapter soundtrack: "All my life" by Foo Fighters, "Bitch" by Meredith Brooks, "Girl with a pearl" by Truman, "Dark side of the moon" by Pink Floyd, "Kids in America" by Kim Wilde, "Hard day's night" by The Beatles.
------------------------
The Beginning of the End
-by UltraViolet41 a.k.a La Gioconda
Chapter Twelve – Middle of nowhere (or "See you in the dark side of the moon")
------------------------
Joan was lucky enough to find an empty parking spot right in front of a drugstore, two blocks away from The Edge Arena. She was glad to get out of the car and stretch her legs, after two hours of driving non-stop. The surrounding area was bustling with people walking or standing around, big reflectors shooting and swaying beams of light up into the evening sky and music blaring from large speakers stationed at diverse spots right outside the perimeter of the venue.
The Edge Arena was the biggest venue in Blakefield, with its five-story tall concrete walls and capacity for holding around 25,000 persons. Because of the inside structure, the arena was mostly for music concerts; from the outside, it looked quite like a school gym blown up three times its size.
Joan checked her watch; it was five to eight, which meant the doors had yet to be opened. There was a line of concert-goers that stretched from the very entrance of the arena building, turned the corner, crossed the street and continued to the next block, where it again turned the corner and went nearly all the way around. And people kept arriving. Joan wondered if the venue would be able to hold this whole crowd; it looked like the 25,000 limit had been maxed out.
She quickly got her wallet and cell from her purse and stuffed them in her pockets; then she hid her purse under the driver's seat and locked the doors. She had to find Luke and the others before the line could start moving. She crossed the street and ran toward the venue entrance, to the very beginning of the line; it was only logical that she should begin searching from the front and move toward the back. Just as she reached the front and started looking for her friends, the large men dressed in black who were guarding the entrance began signalling each other, and then the doors opened, and there was an excited whooping surging through the crowd of fans stationed at the very front. The line began to advance very slowly as, one by one, the thrilled fans surrendered their tickets to the black-clad men and allowed themselves to be briefly frisked for weapons or hazardous objects, before disappearing through the open doors into the building. The air right outside the arena was suddenly abuzz with excitement and electricity all over again.
Joan dodged scalpers and ignored impertinent calls and hoots as she moved alongside the expectant people, occasionally calling out her friends' names when she thought she saw someone who looked like one of them. She was already halfway through the crowd lined at the other side of the street, and getting increasingly frantic, when finally she caught sight of two very familiar figures standing with their backs to her. There was a girl with chin-length blond hair and a black leather jacket standing next to a girl with long dark blond hair and a burgundy parka. Joan sprinted toward them, and let out a relieved sigh when she realized she was right.
Grace and Jordan both turned at once and comically widened their eyes at the sight of Joan.
"I can't believe I found you! I thought I'd go crazy!" Joan exclaimed. Jordan was the first to snap out of her shocked state.
"Joan! You're here! How? When?" she blurted in an attempt to sound coherent.
"I drove my mom's car. I got here about ten minutes ago, and I've been looking for you guys all over the place," Joan explained.
Grace frowned in confusion. "I think she actually means is, what are you doing here? What made you come down here?"
"I came to take the geek back home. Where is he?" Joan peeked around the burly guy ahead of them. Crouching on the floor or leaning against the dank brick wall of the old-fashioned apartment building turned decaying-commercial-establishment complex, was the rest of the gang. Troy, Erika, Carolina, Remy, Adam, Friedman and Luke were animatedly chatting amongst themselves, buzzing as much as everyone else at five miles radius.
The first one to notice her was Adam. He did a double-take, his face clouding over with confusion and (what could perhaps be interpreted as) guilt. "J-Jane," he stammered. "You're… here. You're—"
Joan ignored him bluntly, immediately cutting him off. The others turned to look at her, mildly shocked at her presence. Luke, who was sharing something apparently hilarious with Carolina, stopped mid-sentence as soon as he saw his sister out of the corner of his eye. He looked her up and down, as if making sure he wasn't having a hallucination. "Oh no…" he muttered, suddenly mortified. Joan was nodding slowly, enjoying Luke's mortification.
"Hey, guys. Hope you have fun at the concert. But Luke's going home. Remember: he's got no permission to be here," Joan announced. Troy, Erika, Carolina and Friedman watched the scene with certain amusement, while Adam, Grace, Remy and Jordan observed with caution. The line was moving, and they all stepped forward until it stopped again. Luke gave Joan a wary look.
"Did you come here with mom and dad?"
Joan gave a phony grin. "Luke, if I had told them, although they probably know by now, dad would be the one standing here, holding you at gunpoint," she joked. Luke narrowed his eyes spitefully. Joan sighed. "Come on, little brother. It's past eight already and it's a long ride home. We should get going," Joan said to Luke, grabbing the sleeve of his jacket, tugging slightly so that he would follow. He needed just to tug slightly the other way to get his sleeve out of her grip.
"How about 'no'?" he responded defiantly. Behind Joan, Grace slapped her forehead and shook her head. Joan cocked an eyebrow.
"'No'?" she repeated in a low voice. "How about 'you don't get a say, you just do what I tell you, because I didn't drag myself all the way to another town to witness you trying to be all bad boy'? You're not supposed to be here, remember? As much as I would've enjoyed it in another, less severe occasion, I don't actually want mom and dad to unleash their Armageddon upon you if you turn up at home at four in the morning after sneaking out."
Troy sniggered quietly behind his hand, and Erika elbowed him in the stomach. Luke chuckled lowly, shaking his head in disbelief. "Look, I'm not even going to try to figure out why you came here after all. It's not like anyone made you," he said, trying to keep his cool.
"I beg to differ," Joan mumbled under her breath.
"Whatever. I didn't come all the way here to ditch the concert and be dragged back home by my sister."
Joan stood menacingly, hands in hips, steely gaze drilling her brother in place. "And I didn't steal mom's car and drive some 300 miles for two hours to a strange town to find my brother so that he could tell me that he's not coming with me. You are coming with me. I already drove here all alone because someone who had claimed he wouldn't come to the concert actually came to the concert after all," she gave a very pointed glare in Adam's direction, before glaring back at Luke, "so I had no one with me on the drive over here. I was pissed and scared and tired. I want to go home now, but I'm not going anywhere without the person I came all the way her to get: you. So stop the lame James Dean wannabe act and come with me now."
The others recoiled slightly. Joan seemed to be shooting sparks out of her eyes.
For a moment, they didn't move. Luke had adopted a very steely glare as well, and was now holding a sort of staring contest with Joan, as if to see who could burn a hole through the other's head first. Then the real arguing began. The two siblings were practically biting each other's head off, calling each other names and taunting each other with old grudges and spiteful stories. None of them had even seen Luke or Joan so feisty at each other, and they watched entranced, mostly wary of Joan, who looked like she might actually start punching the lights out of her brother. The line began to move forward again, more rapidly this time, and for a moment the group didn't move, not knowing what to do while Luke and Joan continued to glare at each other; but the people behind them promptly began hollering and pushing, so they had no choice but to move. Oblivious to the constant lurching of people, the pair continued the heated row, their voices getting louder as they neared the arena, because the music from the giant speakers was getting louder as they got closer.
"Hey, we're next!" Caro suddenly yelled. Joan and Luke looked up to find they were only three other people ahead of them in the line, and it was their turn to go through the security frisk. Caro, Troy, Erika, Friedman, Remy and Jordan handed their tickets to one of the black-clad men and stepped through to the spot where the security guards did their metal-detecting and pocket-poking thing before letting anyone through the big doors. They lingered outside the door and turned to look at the other four, who stood undecidedly, tickets in hands. The people behind them started getting restless.
"Move it, twerps!" someone yelled. Others started hooting and whistling.
Adam looked at Joan, and she gave him a blank stare. Unfazed, he stepped toward the guy collecting the tickets and walked toward the security guards. Grace followed, giving Joan an apologetic look.
"Luke…" Joan muttered, a pleading tone on her voice. Luke gave Joan another defiant look as he imitated Adam and Grace and stepped through the entrance. As soon as he was frisked, he grabbed Friedman by the jacket and dragged him through the arena doors and disappeared inside.
"What's it going to be, Joan?" Caro asked. "Did you come all the way here to miss the chance of seeing the Foo Fighters live?"
Joan hesitated. She fingered the ticket in her hand. The noise coming from inside the arena was a resounding mesh of excited screaming and blaring speakers; the thumping of a bass drum accompanied by a singing voice and deafening guitar riffs signaled that one of the opening acts was already on stage. Joan looked at her friends, all waiting for her near the door, some wearing eager looks and some expectant frowns. She really didn't know what to do.
"Kid, I'm gonna have to ask you to step aside. You're stalling the line," the burly ticket guy said to her. The fans behind her kept hooting and whooping at her, and one person even began nudging her forward.
With a heavy sigh, she finally made up her mind. Shoving her ticket in the guy's face, she crossed the chain-link fence entrance and approached one of the security guards. Troy, Erika and Caro cheered, while the others just watched her. The security guard felt down the sides of her body quickly, and stood up.
"Enjoy the show, Joan," he said. Joan had barely registered that, when Jordan and Caro each grabbed one of her arms and led her inside the arena. Looking over her shoulder, she got one last glimpse of God, standing there staring after her, before she was sucked into the concert environment.
------------------------
Joan did not enjoy the show. The Foo Fighters put on an amazing concert, of course, but Joan could not enjoy herself, even though she found herself singing along to every song. Everything made her uncomfortable, constantly reminding her that she really was not supposed to be there. There was a moment when she was separated from the gang, and she was left with only Adam beside her, which didn't make her feel any better. She really didn't want to have anything to do with him.
The concert was over a little later than she had predicted. At 1:20 a.m., the band left the stage, and everybody began trampling each other on the way out of the arena. It was an odyssey to get out, and since the group had managed to split, it took a while until everyone was reunited outside of the venue. They were all sweaty, disheveled and hoarse, but everyone had a thrilled smile plastered on their faces. Everyone except Joan.
The others had to force Luke to go with Joan. Either Luke was very angry with her or very scared; Joan had to practically drag him to the car. They stopped at the nearest gas station to fill up the tank, and Joan went into the store to pick up a few things. She came back with two cans of Coke (both for herself), a bottle of water and a bag of ruffles, all for her; it was sugar and caffeine to keep herself going for the next two hours back home.
Luke slept for most of the ride home, trying to block out that very annoying high-pitched beep in the inside of his skull (the one people get when being exposed to very loud music for an extensive period of time), and the sounds of Joan singing along to the radio awfully loud (and awfully unworried by such things as a key and a rhythm); apparently she was doing it to keep herself awake. When Luke couldn't stand how Joan was totally destroying Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon", he gave a very audible groan and begged her to stop the car.
"Why? Do you need to vandalize something in the middle of nowhere?"
Luke glared at her for the umpteenth time that day. She grinned. "I'm just asking."
"I need to take a leak."
Joan gave a very heavy sigh of impatience. "Fine," she said. She reluctantly turned off the radio and pulled over to the shoulder of the highway. She put the car in "park" and killed the engine. They both got out of the car. "I wanted to stretch my legs anyway. You see, they're very tired from standing for so long during that concert we weren't supposed to go to," she added, her tone aggressively cynical. Luke had half-disappeared behind a tree not too far off, doing his "business".
"It's not my fault you were in the concert. You didn't have to come. And even if you came, you didn't have to stay," he said, still from behind the tree.
"Hey, shh, don't talk to me while you're doing that. It's gross," Joan exclaimed. "There are Sani-Wipes in the glove compartment, by the way. Use them."
Luke came back finally, immediately reaching for the wipes inside the car. A single car sped down the road and flew past them in a second. Everything became quiet again. In the silence, Joan continued humming "Dark side of the moon" while walking over the white line painted on the road.
"I really don't get it, Joan. I was the screw-up tonight," Luke continued, staring at her puzzled. "I thought you would seize the opportunity to redeem yourself, and to taunt me forever. After all, it's always been me the goody-goody, and you the demented Evil Knievel who runs off with a gunned-up psycho prom date."
"Ok, that was a one time thing. And why do you always bring that up?"
"This was your chance to be the good one. Why didn't you take it?"
"What are you talking about? I'm still the good one," Joan argued. "I went all the way to Blakefield to get you back. I even stuck around for the concert just to make sure I was going to drive you back home."
"Oh yeah, like mom and dad are actually going to see it that way."
"Yeah, well, mom and dad don't always have to be right," Joan muttered, mostly to herself.
"What?"
"I said they don't need to see it that way. You'll back me up anyway."
Luke snorted. "Why would I do that?"
"Because I just might have saved your ass tonight."
"What? From what?"
"From anything, actually. A rock concert is no place for a geek like you."
"Oh yes, I am so willing to stand up for you when you refer to me like that," Luke said sarcastically.
"I didn't say that. Kevin did," Joan replied quickly, smiling inwardly at the wittiness of Kevin's remark.
"You're exaggerating. I don't need you to take care of me," Luke retorted.
"Everybody needs to be taken care of by someone," Joan replied. She took a deep breath and leaned against the car. "Look, I know you've never had someone to protect you like I've always had Kevin do for me."
"Oh, please don't tell me you were trying to be the big sister taking care of me!" Luke shouted. "You wanna know what I think? I think you just felt left behind, and this whole lame argument of yours is your supposed excuse for having winded up at the concert."
Joan groaned; she had been right after all. "That is not it at all," she said in a low voice, trying to keep calm. "I was worried about you, ok? That's why I went. I didn't want to go to the concert. Not anymore, because I would've just felt guilty. I didn't go because I felt left behind. I went because of you."
"I think I'm old enough to be able to take care of myself," Luke replied. Joan snorted. Her conversation with news anchorman / God replayed itself in her mind.
"Excuse me, but age does not equal maturity. Just because you can sneak out and run off to a concert in another city does not make you mature at all!" Joan said. She was yelling now, despite being hoarse, her voice echoing in the emptiness of the lonely whereabouts. She gave him a concerned look. "You're not a kid anymore, Luke. Think about the consequences of your actions. Grow up!"
Luke didn't answer. Apparently he had nothing to say. He just stared at her, realizing she was right and how much the truth hurt. Joan gave him an uncharacteristic pat on the shoulder.
"It's not all about fun and games, little brother," Joan continued saying, her voice softer. "You have to be more responsible. You're not impulsive, that's not you at all. And just because the others were going doesn't mean you're gonna die if you don't go as well."
He was still looking down at his hands, his head slightly twisting from left to right. "I can't believe these words are coming from your mouth," he said in a very low voice, not in an unkindly tone. Joan chuckled.
"Well, perhaps I'm maturing. It comes with it," she responded. And she knew she was right. It wasn't God who had told her about it; she had realized this all on her own. Luke straightened up and looked at her, a pained expression on his face.
"It's just…" he began. "I always play by the rules, and I thought… giving myself a little freedom wouldn't hurt."
Joan had to chuckle again. "You make it sound like our house is a prison," she said. "There is freedom and then there's insurrection. Insurrection hurts, because you risk losing our parents' trust."
He sighed heavily. Joan felt there was something else she needed to say. "Look. Nobody likes to have the truth rubbed in the face. I know I don't. But it comes with it, with growing up, becoming mature. Dealing with your mistakes. It's not going to be the end of you."
Luke gave her a faint smile. She realized then, at that precise instant, that she had made, after all, the right choice. Not just for Luke, but for her as well. Maybe her relationship with Luke had never been and probably would never be solid. It's not like they would be just like Kevin and Joan. But Luke now knew he could count on his sister, and that was enough for the moment. They shared moments, awkward but special moments, the most significant being the stunt kite she got him for his birthday which his parents had forgotten. Those moments were rare, which is what made them special. They weren't many, but they were enough.
"Let's just go home and get this over with," Luke said at last, half-heartedly but denoting conviction. Joan patted him again before getting in the car.
"That's the spirit."
They were going to need a lot of spirit to deal with what was waiting for them at home.
------------------------
"If only I had no heart at all, I would have you both arrested."
It was 3:45 in the morning, and the Girardi household was uncharacteristically active. Will was practically throwing smoke out of his ears as he paced between the coffee table and the couch, gesturing spastically in rage, his slippers making a shuffling sound on the carpet. Helen just stood quietly on the other side of the table.
Joan and Luke had their gazes glued down on their hands. They were sitting side to side on the couch in the living room, Will and Helen standing over them in their robes and pyjamas; from the look of the disheveled couch cushions, it seemed they had fallen asleep while waiting for their kids. But when Joan and Luke had walked through the door, their parents had been standing right there, by the door, very alert, Will looking particularly drill sergeant-ish. It seemed anger fueled them with lots of energy.
Luke didn't know how he managed to get out of the car. His shoes seemed to have been filled with lead (which wasn't so strange, considering he had spent four of the past six hours standing and jumping around, which is why not only did his shoes feel like they were filled with lead, but also his legs felt like spaghetti), and as he climbed the stairs onto the porch and approached the front door, they just kept getting heavier and heavier. It didn't help him at all that he looked like shit (and probably smelled similarly, too).
He was glad to get home at last, because it meant he would get to sleep in his bed, and because he wouldn't have to listen to Joan sing anymore; she had become increasingly more dissonant after the caffeine and sugar kicked in and she was no longer running on natural stamina. On the other hand, the Joan had woken him up because they were already pulling into the driveway, and Luke caught sight of the squares of light coming from the living room and kitchen windows, it finally hit him, the magnitude of what he had done, and what was going to happen now. At that precise moment he was wishing he could be anywhere but here.
"You kids obviously have no idea what it's like, but I just want you to picture it for a moment," Helen was saying now, in an eerily soft voice. She took her chance when Will stopped for air. "The agony, the stress, the unbearable desperation of waiting, powerless, expecting, hoping, praying that your children are alright, that time will race until the moment they get back, because the hours just stretch endlessly. And you wish you could roam the world all over in a second and find them and bring them back. But you know you can't. It's a horrible, horrible feeling; the fear, the restlessness, not knowing what to do or what will happen. Are you picturing it? Does it seem like something you would like to actually live out?"
It would have been no different if Helen had been screaming her words at them, because Joan had the awful wrenching feeling in her gut. She felt terrible. Just a few weeks ago Helen had been telling her how proud she was of how Joan had matured. Now Helen was probably regretting that statement, and she was most likely thinking she was the most irresponsible, selfish girl. And nothing that Joan said in her defense would help her.
"Mom, dad, if I may say something," Luke interrupted, his voice revealing a slight quiver that demonstrated how shaken he was; after all, this was the first time he was getting so severely reprimanded.
Luke bit his lip and took a deep breath. "It's all my fault. I'm the one who snuck out to go to the concert. Joan wasn't going to go. She didn't want to disobey you. She actually went because of me. She was worried that I could get in trouble, so she came after me just to make sure I was okay, and to bring me home. But I didn't want to leave, which is why she stayed with me. And then she brought me home," he blurted out, his words tripping over because of how fast he spat them out.
Silence followed his statement. After a few seconds, Will made a strange sound with his throat, like a drowned snort. "Well, that's an interesting way of not disobeying us. So she left the house without a word, took her mother's car without permission, and drove out of the city to a concert we had forbidden her to go to?"
Joan opened her mouth to state that she hadn't left without a word, because Kevin had known, but she caught herself just in time, remembering she had told him he could pretend not to know, so she snapped her mouth closed again. Will caught her changing her mind about saying something.
"You should've told us. We are the ones supposed to handle these situations. If you had let us know, I would've been the one to follow Luke to the concert and forced him into the car at gunpoint, if necessary," he said to her in a hard-edged.
Joan and Luke exchanged a look. I told you, Joan's expression said clearly.
"You're both grounded until further notice. And as if all of this weren't enough excuse for that, I will justify myself further tomorrow morning. But right now I'm too tired and upset, and I need to sleep," Will added, his impetus going steadily down.
"I just—" Luke interjected again. Will and Helen fixed their gazes on him, expectant. Luke tried not to recoil. "Look, I know nothing that I say will make you feel any less angry or change your minds. I'm not trying to free myself from any punishment. But I do want you to know that I'm really sorry for what I did, and I promise I'll never do it again. It's not worth it. I wouldn't want to lose your trust."
Joan hoped he was being honest, and he wasn't just regurgitating what she had said to him. He inhaled before continuing.
"And I'm really serious about Joan. She tried to talk me out of going to the concert, but I didn't listen. When we were in Blakefield, she really wanted to drag me back to the car and take me home. She showed me how stupid and selfish I had been to have done this."
Will and Helen were too tired to try to hide their incredulous faces. Joan continued to sit there, quiet. She realized then she hadn't actually said a single word since she had stepped through the doorway. She was worried that if she said something she would screw things up much worse for her or Luke, and she was curious about how her parents would react to Luke's words. She was shocked herself, at the fact he was defending her. He seemed to be honest after all.
Helen sighed slowly, and Will sniffed. "I don't want to hear anymore," he said, not totally unkindly. He wasn't so angry anymore, just sleep-deprived. "We'll talk in the morning. But I suppose you're both well aware that what you did was awful, inconsiderate and irresponsible. There's no other way to look at it. You'll just have to deal with the consequences now."
Consequences, yeah, Luke thought, bobbing his head in resignation. Joan knew exactly what he was thinking.
The four of them went upstairs, exchanging no more words until they got to the second floor.
"You're both going to school tomorrow—well, today," Will corrected himself. "No matter what, you're going to school." And he disappeared inside his bedroom. Helen was about to follow him, but she turned to Joan, her eyes icy but sorrowful.
"Before I go to bed angry, I just want to know one thing: what were you thinking?" she asked. Joan felt the wrench in her gut again.
"I was just trying to do the right thing," she replied in a very low voice. That's all she could say.
Helen shook her head and half-chuckled, as if she thought it was actually a funny thing to say. "What makes you think that was the right thing to do?"
"Sometimes the right thing to do is not that evident."
Helen made that exhaling noise again, but she didn't smile. She just gave Joan a pained look before walking into her bedroom and closing the door. Joan sighed, slumping her shoulders in disappointment. She turned around. Luke was still standing there, gently leaning against the banister, his gaze fixed on his shoes in a thoughtful pose, as if he were weighing what had taken place downstairs. He looked at her when he felt her staring. They never spoke. They just suddenly grinned at each other. Nothing else needed to be said.
Joan stuffed her hands in her pockets. "Get some sleep. You look like shit," she finally said, still grinning. Luke nodded and went to his bedroom. Joan stared after him for a second before going into her own room and closing the door behind her.
------------------------
Neither icy cold showers nor a large caffeine dose was enough to get Joan out of her energy slump. She was sleepless, restless and hopeless, which were not very good conditions to suffer on a school day. Luke apparently fell asleep under the shower, which is why it took so long for him to come out. He was cranky in spite of his zombie-like state.
Her parents were probably not as tired as her or Luke, but they were silent and slow as they got ready for work. They never said anything to either one of them, but judging by the way they looked warily at their children, Joan had an inkling the subject would be picked up again in the evening, when her parents were wide awake and wanting to vent their daily frustrations with someone.
The only one apparently feeling great that morning was Kevin, who went from one side to the other with great energy, fetching things for breakfast and getting ready for his day. He made a couple of smart-assed remarks about no morning people, but shut up after he realized none of them was in the mood, fearing he might earn himself some sort of injury from one of them.
Joan sleep-walked down the sidewalk as she approached the bus stop, Luke not far behind. There was only one other person waiting for the bus, a boy about her own age, with shaggy dark brown hair, bright green eyes and a black jacket, who glanced at her and smiled when she stood beside him. She smiled back, her cheeks flushing slightly, and she tried to put her best face and posture. It wasn't easy when her brother seemed to have fallen asleep standing up, his glasses slipping slowly to the tip of his nose. She made a face at the sight of him. Whatever Grace was thinking… she thought.
The bus got to the stop shortly, and when the doors opened, Luke automatically made his way inside and sat in the nearest seat next to the window, so he could rest his head and catch some more sleep. The guy smiled at Joan again and made the gesture with his hand to let her through first, making Joan's cheek flush even more. She tried not to trip clumsily on the first step (as it sometimes happened to her when she was sleepy), and went to the middle of the bus just because, since the bus was half-empty at the moment. To her surprise, the boy followed her and sat right next to her. Joan didn't know if she should be feeling butterflies in her stomach or rather be a little afraid.
When the driver pulled out of the stop, she turned to the boy as if to speak to him, but she didn't know what to say. At this instant, she was too tired to think about anything, but she wondered if asking him for his name would be a good start for now. Before she could say anything, however, he faced her and gave her an impish grin.
"No introductions required, Joan. We've known each other long enough, wouldn't you say?"
It took Joan a couple of seconds to react, due to her low energy levels. She would've smacked Him if it weren't because this was God and because He was rather cute.
"I'm really not in the mental or body state to deal with you right now. I need to sleep. And if you're going to reprimand me for what I did last night, a choice that, I might add, was based on what we had discussed previously, then you can save your breath, because I won't listen to you. I'll be doing plenty of that tonight when my parents sentence me and Luke."
God stopped smiling charmingly and looked to the front. "Why did you go to Blakefield, Joan?"
Joan frowned at him. "Because you told me to. You said I had to protect Luke."
"Yes, but I didn't say 'Joan, steal your mom's car, go to Blakefield and bring your brother back'."
She looked blankly at Him. "I didn't steal her car! I was just borrowing it!" she said angrily. God breathed deeply.
"That was the choice you made. You had the option of telling your parents and letting them deal with Luke, or going after him like you eventually did. Do you think you made the right choice?"
Again, Joan was unable to respond. She didn't know what had led her to jump into her mom's car and drive to Blakefield. A feeling, she had called it, that something might happen to Luke. How could she possibly protect Luke any more than her parents can? Maybe she should've told them, let Luke deal with them, and keep herself out of trouble. It was just an opportunity like this one, just like Luke had said, to be the good one and gloat over her brother screwing up. Why hadn't she taken it?
"Look, this was his first major screw up. He doesn't even know what getting in trouble is. He wouldn't have made it through alone. My parents would've killed him," she said very quickly, trying to justify herself.
"But why get yourself in trouble?"
"Because!" she exclaimed a bit too loud, startling a few people around them. She lowered her voice. "Because he's a bit of an idiot. If mom and dad had gone after him and punished him, he would probably defy them again and again, just to spite them and to play the rebel role. I just wanted to make him see how stupid he was being."
"You were protecting him," God said.
Joan shrugged. "I suppose. I just wish he would grow up."
God nodded. "When you grow up, you gain more freedom. It's that little adventurous spirit inside everyone that is usually referred to as independence. Being independent, or free, comes with responsibilities. In most cases, you are responsible of making the right choice for yourself, and dealing with the consequences. Luke's not the only one who learned that last night. You already knew it; you just needed to be reminded of it."
Joan sighed tiredly. "Well, I'm in deep shit with my parents."
"And so you grow to learn from your mistakes," God explained.
Joan smiled half-heartedly. "'What doesn't kill me makes me stronger'?"
God chuckled. "Something like that, yes."
Leaning forward slightly, Joan looked at Luke, sleeping some four files ahead, his head swinging limply back and forth against the glass with the motion of the bus. She looked at God again. "Was it worth it?"
"If you think you made the right choice after all, you'll see for yourself," God answered, smiling wittily again. He looked to the front as well, just as the bus was pulling into the stop near Arcadia High. "This is your stop," He said. Joan suddenly very tired all over again merely at the thought of the next half-day stuck at school.
"Is there a chance you would consider helping me out? After all, I did the right thing, I save my brother from an unknown evil and taught him a lesson. Don't you think I deserve a break?"
"What are you talking about? It's a great day to be awake. There's so much to experience. There are things you need to work out. You never stop learning," God said animatedly. Joan glared at Him. She pushed Him out of the way, yanked Luke after her and got off the bus before He could say anything else that might annoy her. Luke blinked several times, apparently lost, Joan still dragging him as they started toward the school. The bus drove away, and Joan glanced at the window where God was sitting. He waved at her and smiled before He was out of sight. Joan momentarily wondered what He had meant by "things she needed to work out", but she forgot about it as she continued to pull Luke along.
------------------------
Once again, I'm so sorry about the delay. Once I recovered from the cold I had, I was trying to recover from writer's block and the constant headaches and lack of energy I undergo after quitting coffee (I can't believe it's only the second day! I might die!). When you suffer from bi-polar disorder, you're not supposed to take any sort of stimulants like caffeine or too much sugar. After much nagging from my family, friends, psychologists, etc, I've decided to indulge them just to get them off my back. It's been a nightmare (have you tried to picture an Italian without his/her daily espresso?)
In other notes, God as we just met him was based on my boyfriend Seth. He's been expecting his big debut since, I think, the first three chapters, and I've kept him waiting long enough (wasn't he cute?). He will make other appearances in the future, of course.
Mike: And I'm still waiting for MY own debut.
Alexz: Chill, Chemist, I'm building up to your big debut. It's perhaps the biggest one, so it needs a lot of 'building up to'. You'll see.
Mike: rubs hands together mischievously
Thanks to Azure057 for keeping me grounded. I'm sorry I spoiled the series for you. I'm not doing so good myself. The last episode I saw was the one about the recorded statements and Luke's birthday.
To Jane and Adam: I'm terribly sorry, but you'll have to wait until next chapter to see how I fixed the plot-hole. This chapter ran too long and I didn't want to make it even longer. Please be patient. I'll try to hurry, I promise.
More coming soon! Thanks for reading! Good night!
In the darkNess