Disclaimer: None of the people, places, or things surrounding Hogwarts the Wizarding world are my creation; they belong to the wonderful Ms. Jo Rowling.
Author's Note: I would like to apologize once again for the extreme delay in getting this new chapter up. I listed the reasons why in the last author's note, so I won't bore you all with the details again. I'm very sorry, but if there's one thing I've learned in this past month, it's that you can't predict life, and no matter, it will always throw you curveballs. It's up to you to deal with them, then try to get past them and be happy. Learning that lesson was my inspiration for this (happy!) chapter.
I would like to credit some of the quotes in this chapter to a wonderful novel I just read for my AP Literature class. Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston is a beautiful story of a young woman struggling to find true love and independence in a world where women are looked down on in society. I highly recommend it.
"No moment is eternity, but it has its right to weep." --Their Eyes Were Watching God
RonMione4eva: We will be hearing an "I love you" in the VERY near future! (Hint, hint.) Thank you so much for sticking with me during the brief hiatus. I loved reading your story in the meantime, and I hope that this extremely fluffy chapter does you proud. Also, thank you BUNCHES for your good thoughts about the situtation with my Ron...boys are so unbelievably frustrating, and trust me, I felt so much like my Hermione in my story during these past few weeks! Thank you very, very much!
TheSingingBlob: Thank you very much for your compliments! One of the reasons I write Hermione the way I do (I feel I understand her so well!) is because I'm a lot like her. Always working to get the best grades, and have a panic attack if I don't do as well as I'd hoped. I also feel that every girl has a bit of "Hermione" in them!
letsseesomeid: I think we were all screaming at Hermione just then! I swear, sometimes that girl is just way too stubborn for her own good, eh? But all will be right with the world...I promise!
harrypotterfan2011: The reason I haven't had Hermione say "I love you" is simply she was very scared, and worried about what might happen if she and Ron confessed their love for each other when they could very well die before, during or after the war. But don't worry; she will come to her senses.
Christine (suckr4romance) I agree with your analysis of Hermione's emotions--she is very much feeling all of those right now, but mostly she's terrified of all the "what if's" that could happen. I must confess that I was crying while writing parts of this chapter. Imagining these two characters, whom I've grown to love--Hermione as my fictional alter-ego, and Ron as that one guy every girl wishes for--finally getting things right. I hope you enjoy this chapter, and thank you for your encouraging words about my reviews! I can't believe it either.
Blonde-Titch: I'm so sorry that I've put you near an explosion! LoL. Seriously, though, I'm feeling the same way. I really think that even though we all thought it was Ron who was too stubborn to admit he loved Hermione, she's the brainy one who's mind never shuts off...therefore, there is more room for horrible scenarios to enter her head. Thank you for your comment about how I write the conversations between the two of them! I've always loved writing dialogue, and hope to one day write a movie screenplay. Oh, and about the length? Well, I'd like to say I'm just going with the flow, but I really think at this point, there is only going to be one more chapter. It'll be an epilogue of sorts...and you'll finally figure out why the title of the story is "Nothing Like It." Cheers!
Phillyactress: I'm dreading the end of this story, too! Sob...I've been writing it since August, and it feels like the end of an era now that it's almost over. For me as well, fanfiction is my guilty pleasure, something I don't share with my friends (many of them wouldn't really understand). Thank you once again for sticking with me and this story for so long! I appreciate it SO MUCH!
goblin monkey: Thank you for understanding my reasoning for not having Hermione say "I love you" back to Ron right away. I think I stayed true to her character as well, and I'm glad that you recognize that. (Though of course, I'm as frustrated with the idea of not taking a leap of faith like that, as the next person...but I had to stick with what Hermione would do.)
Bev Granger711: Thank you for your advice about the problems I've been having lately. Hearing all the encouraging thoughts really added to my drive to finish this chapter. I did have a lengthy talk with my Ron, and while things will never be the same, they are getting better and I'm not as upset as I was before. Thank you for understanding, and I hope you like this chapter!
Thank you again to everyone else who has faithfully reviewed...and everyone who sent me words of encouragment during my hard time. I love you all! Sugarquill
Oh, and I wasn't sure how to refer to this chapter, seeing as technically it is the 14th, even though the last one (14) was an Author's Note. I'm going to call it Chapter 14, so please bear with me, and don't get too confused!
Chapter 14: A Little More Love
Nothing was harder than knowing you had to hold the tears in, when all you really wanted to do was let them come out, let the whole world see your pain, and know that even for just a bit, things aren't all right.
Ron sat stiffly in his chair as the funeral for Albus Dumbledore came to an end, and attendees began wandering around the grassy field, some crying, others sharing memories of the beloved headmaster. A muscle in his jaw twitched as he clenched his teeth hard, to keep the tears from pouring out of his eyes. He'd already cried too much the past few days. He refused to embarrass himself further by doing so again.
A quite sniffle from beside him drew him out of his thoughts. He turned and saw Hermione sobbing into her arm, her head turned to side, as if she couldn't bear him seeing her cry. His heart lurched at the sight of her in pain. He knew that today would be hard for her...but damn it! Didn't she know how much she'd hurt him? Ron would give anything not to see Hermione upset ever again, but there was only so much a man could take from the woman he loved, before he broke completely.
"Her--Hermione?" he asked tenatively, reaching out a hand to touch her shoulder. The movement seemed to startle her as she jumped and looked up at him in shock.
"Oh...sorry," she said, then hiccuped. As her face pinked, Ron couldn't help the crooked smile that came over his face. Some things never changed. Hermione would forever get a raging case of the hiccups after every bout of crying. He'd told her time and again that if she would just quit being a hosepipe, she wouldn't have the problem.
"Everything's changed, hasn't it?" Her voice came through absently, and he realized he'd been staring at her with a blank look on his face.
"Yes...but you know, it'll be over soon," he said, then blanched. "That came out wrong...I just meant..."
"No, no, I think I understand. No moment is eternity, of course, but even it has its right to weep," Hermione said absently. "We--we deserve this time." But even then, her chin began to wobble and the tears started streaming down in waves.
"Er, sorry, Hermione. I--I just...never mind. Are you all right?" He paused as her eyes widened in disbelief. "Oh, bloody hell, of course you're not all right. This is a ruddy funeral, for Merlin's sake!"
Ron's voice had been escalating, and was now drawing the attention of the crowd around them. Hermione's face reddened even more, and tears were once again pooling in her eyes. Ron groaned, and waved a hand in their general direction.
"It's a bloody funeral!" he roared. "We're entitled to be a bit upset!" That did it. The people turned their heads, leaving Ron and Hermione relatively alone.
Ron blushed, and coughed into his hand. "Sorry," he muttered. "I just..." He trailed off on a sigh. What had happened to them?
Hermione managed a brittle smile. "It's all right, Ron. It was a nice thing you did. I don't particularly want the entire crowd watching me cry." She wiped her nose lightly. "I'm not the most goregous thing sometimes."
"You're bloody beautiful, Hermione," Ron said without thinking.
Hermione's jaw dropped, but he noticed the quick smile his words had brought. The two stared at each other for a few moments, and just like that, Ron felt the uneasiness slowly slipping away. Perhaps Hermione refused to tell him her true feelings, but at least he knew that she wasn't immune to him.
As Hermione took in Ron's face, she felt the tears build up once more. How could she have been so stupid? She wanted to kick herself in the head for ruining things. She KNEW how hard talking about feelings was for Ron, and yet, once again, she'd just thrown them away like they were nothing.
And now she had the added guilt that she would even dare to think about something like this during a funeral, of all places! Remembering the reason why they were there, she sniffled once more, then let the tears fall.
Ron's face contorted, and before she knew it, he had pulled her roughly into his arms. The fact that they were quite alone, as Harry had disappeared a few moments earlier, Ginny following silently, absently registered in her mind, as she inhaled Ron's signature scent. Hermione buried her face in his shoulder, clutching her arms around his back, never wanting to let go. No matter how many times they'd fought throughout the years, and no matter how often she'd wondered how much easier her life would be if Ron Weasely wasn't part of it (sometimes), he had always been able to make her feel safe and secure. If Death Eaters attacked Hogwarts right that very moment, she somehow knerw that he would do anything to protect her.
The guilt seeped in even more, and her crying turned into full-fledged sobs. "Oh, Ron," she stumbled, "I--I'm...I'm so...sor--sorry!"
Ron pulled back a bit, to look down into her face. "About what?"
"Everything," she wailed. "I'm so...so stupid!"
Somewhere in the back of her mind, Hermione was fairly certain that discussing their personal matters at a funeral was quite possibly the worst timing ever, but her mind--and heart--seemed to have a mind of its own.
"Um..." Ron looked around their surroundings carefully, as if judging whether this was a trick or not. "You're not stupid?" he said in a question.
"But I am! You...you are so unbelievably wonderful, and always there, albeit you don't always use your ears and brain together, but that's quite all right, I suppose, and--"
"Er, Hermione?" he interrupted. "Point?"
She refrained--just barely--from rolling her eyes at him. "I'm sorry, Ron. I'm sorry that Dumb..." She stopped when her voice stopped up, but then continued bravely. "...Sorry that Dumbledore is...no longer here. I'm sorry that I haven't been there for you this whole year. An--and I'm sorry that I haven't..."
Ron's brow drew into a line. "You haven't what?"
Herrmione took a deep breath. She kept her arms around him, but pulled back enough to look him in the eye. "I am so sorry that I haven't told you my feelings. I've always been after you and Harry about that, and then here I've been, doing the exact same thing...and it's just terrible, you see, because I can't very well go about--"
Ron heaved an exasperated sigh. Though this was most definitely one of the things he loved most about Hermione, sometimes her frequent speaking tangents got right annoying.
"Hermione..." he said in a tone that warned her she was getting off topic again. Her cheeks burned.
"Sorry, sorry," she whispered. "Okay, what I mean is: I--I...I love you, Ron."
There. She'd gone from saying nothing of importance, to blurting it right out, in blunt words. She ducked her head back under Ron's, her face in his neck, so as to avoid seeing his rection.
Judging from the way his body tensed beneath her, he seemed surprise. She was just about to take back what she'd said when she heard his voice rumble next to her ear.
"Hermione...did--did you just...I mean..." He sighed. "Did you mean it?" he finally asked, astounded that he'd managed to say that without stumbling too much.
"Yes, I did," she responded clearly, pulling back to look at him once again. "Ron, nothing hurts me more than knowing how much courage it took for you to tell me you loved me...twice. And for me to not say anything back, well, I'm surprised you're still speaking to me."
"I can hardly not speak to the girl I love," he scoffed, once more surprised at his boldness.
Hermione smiled, her eyes filling with tears yet again. She threw herself at him, and he gripped her tightly. The weight of the emotions of the past few days hit her once again full force. Everything from the battle, to Ron's breakdown in the hospital wing, to hearing the news about Dumbledore...even to this. She was astonished by the freeing feeling she got from finally telling Ron that she loved him.
"Dumbledore was right, you know," she said, voicing her thoughts. "When there's even just a little bit more love in the world, I feel like we can do anything." She gestured up toward the sky, bright, calm and sunny, even on such a sad day.
Ron cocked a half-smile. "I reckon you're right, Hermione."
The two stayed like that for a few more moments. And then suddenly, yet again, she felt the sorrow creep up, slowly but surely.
"Hermione, what's wrong?" Ron said in confusion.
Hermione wiped at her face, feeling like a blubbering idiot. "Oh, it's just that...Dumbledore would be so happy. But--but he can't see this! He won't know...because we won't ever seee him again to--to tell him!" she wailed unhappily.
This time, Ron didn't even try to say something to console her. He just made a hoarse sound at the back of his throat as he grabbed her, and pulled her to him.
"But we love each other, right? I'd say that's all we need...and Dumbledore probably knew that ages before we did," he said quietly into her hair. "Ginny's made noises about all the teachers knowing...she reckons they had some sort of a poll going around."
When he got a small giggle out of her, he heaved a huge sigh of relief. "She said nearly the same thing to me, many a time," Hermione admitted. "We're a right case, aren't we, Ron?"
"You've got that right."
Though the tears still poured from her eyes, now they were becoming tears of happiness and relief, mixed in with the sadness. She would always miss Dumbledore, but she knew that this funeral was supposed to be a celebration of his life...and his life had always been dedicated to love. Hermione vowed never again to hold back her feelings, like she'd done with Ron for so many years.
"I love you so much, Ron," she whispered fiercely, grabbing onto his chin, and bringing him to look at her.
In that moment, Ron could have sworn he felt his heart stop up in his throat. He had to swallow twice before he felt he could actually speak. And even then, the most sounds he emitted were small squeaks. "I--I, er..." He paused, gathering courage...someday, he was sure, he'd be able to say this without stuttering and turning crimson red.
"I love you, too, Hermione." And though he momentarily thought better of it, he couldn't resist leaning down and pressing a kiss quickly to her lips. Though it was short, Ron put all of the pent up emotions from the past six years into that kiss, hoping to convey in that second, every little thing he loved about her.
They pulled away, and Hermione felt like she'd just been punched. She could feel her gaze cloud up, as Ron's form materialized slowly in front of her. "Wow," she murmured, placing a hand on her mouth.
Ron's face split into a wide grin. He couldn't help it. A compliment like that from Hermione meant more than she could even imagine.
He pulled her back to him, and let her cry. This time, he didn't even attempt to ask why she was bawling. He chalked it up to her being sad about Dumbledore; he doubted it was because she was upset about the two of them. Oh, how ruddy fantastic it is to think that, he thought to himself. Never thought I'd the day.
Ron held Hermione, stroking her hair, as he looked around the funeral attendees, really letting it seep in. Suddenly, as he noticed all the other men crying, he realized that holding everything in wasn't good. Slowly, he felt the tears start slipping down his nose. Hermione sensed the change, and seemed to push herself closer to him, until there was no space between them. She pressed her face into his robes.
Across the grass, Ron could distantly make out Harry turning his back on Ginny. He felt a pang when he noticed his little sister's resigned, but still a bit broken, face. Harry's expression was equally dim.
Ron sighed. Hermione was right. Things had changed...and were going to keep changing. But somehow, he reckoned that things would be all right in the end.
Hermione broke away, as if sensing that now Harry needed them. She turned to go, then went back, grabbing Ron's hand in her own. "We just have to believe," she said, in response to his silent observation. "And have a little more love."
A/N: Okay, it ends abruptly. I'm very sorry, but I was nearly melted completely to my chair after writing all that mushiness. Honest to god, it was nearly driving me insane. I hoped you all liked it. Hermione's philosophical quote does indeed come from Their Eyes Were Watching God, which I'm totally in love with right now. We got an "I love you" out of her! I hope you all are happy...I know I am! Thank you once again for sticking with me during this hard time...I appreciate your happy words of encouragement more than you will ever know!
I'm pleased to say that things between "my Ron" and me are slowly getting better. It will take time, but I think we can fix what got broken. Thank you for your support!