Heaven Sent

Here in My Room

-----

This party is old and uninviting
Participants all in black and white
You enter in full-blown Technicolor
Nothing is the same after tonight

If the world would fall apart
In a fiction worthy wind
I wouldn't change a thing
Now that you're here

Yeah, love is a verb here in my room
Here in my room, here in my room

You enter and close the door behind you
Now show me the world as seen from the stars
If only the lights would dim a little
I'm weary of eyes upon my scars

Pink tractor beam into your incision
Head spinning as free as dervish's' whirl
I came here expecting next to nothing
So thank you for being that kind of girl
That kind of girl

Here in My Room- Incubus

-----

Lydia was seething. That possibly was the worst outing she had ever had the displeasure of attending. That stupid elf patronizing her and then Remus acting like it was nothing! Who did they think they were?

Her arms crossed, and her jaw clenched, the Ravenclaw stomped up the steps, her destination the library. Lydia had decided she had seen the worst of the night. It could only get better, if only marginally. She would get the misfortunes of the evening off her mind through some translating, she was sure. She reached the top of the steps, and proceeded walking down the dim corridor.

As her prints resounded time after time, she heard an airy giggle somewhere near- a very familiar giggle…

"Oh, no! Emmaline! I could never!" The words came out in a high pitched squeak. Elle-Lydia was certain now, and as she rounded the corner, the sight came as proof. Up ahead there was a group of three giggling girls- well, she couldn't really say that. Morrie was never one to giggle.

"You weren't so discrete with Black," Lydia heard Morrie's prominent voice but could not see her lips move from so far away. She sounded somehow displeased, speaking in her usual blunt and arrogant tone.

"But Sirius is quite the catch."

Lydia was tempted to growl, but she was reminded vaguely of Severus. Emmaline… and there she was, just up ahead, flipping her moonless locks. She was standing between Morrie and Elle, her nose high up like the queen she thought herself to be. Lydia wasn't sure who she hated more at that moment, that absurd excuse for a person in front of her or that stupid house elf. Her hands, crossed with her arms, dug into the flesh below her shoulders.

As the company of girls came closer, she was sure she caught Elle looking at her before turning back quickly to Emmaline, making a comment she did not hear. Emmaline seemed too absorbed in the new witty rebuttal she was saying to notice Lydia, but Morrie… Morrie was staring at her with a hawk's gleam.

Maybe this was her chance to apologize. She was certain Elle and Morrie would be glad to hear it. They would take her back, wouldn't they? It had only been a stupid fight- barely a fight at all… yes, she would apologize, and this was the only time she would really corner them. They wouldn't be able to avoid her.

When Lydia was just a few feet in front of them, she swallowed, and stuck out her chin, "Hello."

There was no answer.

The three girls just continued walking, not looking back. Lydia's jaw unhinged and she turned around, watching them, "Wait! Elle! Morrie!" she called desperately, realizing that they had ignored her. She took a few steps in their direction, hoping to grab their attention, but she stopped. Morrie was looking back over her shoulder. She frowned and shook her head, then turning back to the other girls.

Lydia stopped breathing for a moment, her eyes tracing the group until they had turned the corner, her ears perched until their voices could no longer be heard. Her chin pointed straight to the ground, and she clasped her eyes shut. Her arms still crossed, but no longer in that sort of rebellious way, but almost as if she was cold and striving to stay warm.

They had ignored her- completely ignored her. She wasn't even acknowledged by them, those who she had called her best friends.

But she couldn't get upset about it. She wouldn't. She took a deep breath and shook her head. She needed to clear her thoughts, and at this moment, she doubted the library would suit her needs. Lydia wanted badly to return to her dorm, to succumb to the sleep that was wanted and needed, but she knew they would be there. She sighed. The library was the best place to go, and she had promised Severus she would work anyway, even if she had already attempted to break it.

Dropping her arms, she started walking again.

-----

Only minutes later, Lydia found herself entering the far empty library. What time was it?

Madam Pince was craning over her desk, stamping a good number of books. She looked up when she heard the squeak of the door, "Lydia," she said briskly, "I would think you of all people would be familiar with the hour at which this library closes."

Lydia looked to the clock above the older woman's head. It read eight eleven. Lydia sighed, "I'm sorry, Madam Pince. I didn't realize it was that late."

She turned around wearily, making to leave when Madam Pince's voice stopped her, "That little project you've got with Severus, then?"

Lydia switched back, "Yes."

The librarian looked her over with a keen eye, "You've had a rough day, haven't you?"

"I suppose…" Lydia murmured. She smiled sympathetically.

"If I left you here to work, could I trust you to lock up?"

Lydia was surprised by this, but she nodded carefully. The librarian took a ring of dangling keys from her robes, and came to Lydia, placing them in her hand, "Take care, then…" She put her hand on the girl's shoulder, "I hope everything works out."

And with that she was gone, snapping the door shut. She left behind a very stunned Lydia though, standing in the lonely library, now dark except for the few torches that lighted the walls. Delicately, she placed the keys in her own jean pocket, and heading to the back of the library.

She breezed by the towering shelves, trying to push down the scratch growing in her throat. She was relieved to reach the table and practically feel into the seat, dropping the graying messenger bag at her side. Swallowing, she tucked her hair behind her ears, and bent down to take out her work, stacking it on the table. Slowly, she opened the book and immediately placed the dictionary at her side. Her eyes, blinking furiously, turned to the writing.

She tried to follow the words jumping off the page, but she found herself more and more distracted with each passing second. Her nails began to wear down as she picked at them furiously. She kept swallowing, hoping her neck wasn't getting splotchy.

She was trying so hard, so hard not to break down, and it was all in vain as she felt to hot droplets fall on her lanky arm. She wiped them away harshly, but it only brought more streaming down her face. Bringing her hands to her face, the sobs she had tried to swallow choked out, and her head fell into her palms, her elbows shaking where they stood on the table.

She didn't know how long she stayed there, caught in something of a trance as the sobs and tears poured out of her- trying to make up for so many times she had pushed them away. But she soon snapped out of it as she heard footsteps, heading most likely in her direction.

She used the sleeve of her blouse, cleaning away the water, but her face still shined fresh. She shut her eyes, hoping to slow if not stop any more from coming. When she opened them, she did all she could not to let them fall, and there was almost a pain behind her lids, begging her to let go.

"Lydia?"

She recognized that voice. It's deep, strong tone ringing through the darkness around her. Looking up, the first thing she could see were his obsidian orbs, gleaming cold in the torchlight. He stepped forward coming into the illumination, his head tilted almost curiously.

She said nothing, meeting his gaze, but not before silent tears dripped softly from her lashes once more.

"You're crying," he said bluntly. He was surprised to find her this way.

Lydia frowned, "I know."

Slowly, like approaching a wild animal, he came to sit in the seat beside Lydia, always watching her with his sharp eyes.

"Why are you here?" she asked.

"Madam Pince said you needed help."

"She was wrong."

Severus watched her intently a moment, before shaking his head softly, "I don't think she was."

Lydia clamped her eyes shut again, cringing at his comment, "You don't know what you're talking about."

"Maybe you would inform me."

Lydia choked down another sob at this, but it amounted in an embarrassing hiccup, "You wouldn't understand."

Severus nodded, "You're right. I wouldn't." He stood up to leave, but without thinking Lydia's hand reached up to catch his. She would never fully understand what had driven her to do it. She could only explain it as a mere reaction or maybe she wanted him to stay. No one ever really wants to be alone in that sort of state, do they?

He stopped, staring at her for a moment.

"I'm sorry," she murmured, pulling her hand away from his. She was surprised to find he would not let go; only squeezing her hand. Quietly, he slid back into the chair. He didn't say anything, but watched her with a calculating intentness. They sat their like that for a while, their hands still together.

Lydia broke the compromising silence with a deep breath, her tears finally had slowed, "I feel so- so… I don't really know how I feel," she began, "It seemed like everything was going fine this year. Not perfect… never perfect, but fine enough… But then…"

"Then you began to spend time with me," Severus finished for her.

Lydia sighed, "Yes, I suppose that's one of the reasons. Elle and Morrie were never fond of you."

"Is that what all this is about? Your friends?"

She hated to admit it, "Yes… and Remus too, and Emmaline, and … really everyone I guess."

"Remus? What's wrong with Lupin?" he questioned. Lydia gave out a bit of a groan.

"I don't know… I guess… I was so sure I liked him, and them tonight… he wasn't really that bad or anything… just sort of an underhanded bastard I guess."

"Underhanded bastard is an understatement."

Lydia smiled a bit at this, "And you're biased."

"True… What did he do?"

"Took me to the kitchens," she said, scratching her itchy, but now dry eyes. Severus looked grimly appalled.

"The kitchens?"

"Where I had the privilege to meet the most obnoxious house-elf on this side of the Channel, only to find that our location was a recent go to with his ex- girlfriend- Emmaline." She frowned profusely at the last bit.

"Vance, right?"

"Yeah," Lydia said miserably, "Not only is she is ex-girlfriend. Oh, no, she's also decided to take my spot between Morrie and Elle. I've been officially replaced."

Severus thought for a moment, "I know I don't have very much experience in the area, but is that a thing real friends would do?"

"Replace me, you mean?" Severus nodded, as Lydia pondered the idea, "No, I don't think it is," she said finally.

The two fell into silence, both looking anywhere but each other. Lydia had no idea what time it was, but she felt it must be getting late. Looking down at the table, she saw that Severus's hand was still in hers. She smiled sadly. His hand, so thin and cold, still seemed to give her the warmth she needed in the musty library.

She cleared her throat, grabbing Snape's attention, "Do you have the time?" she asked.

He nodded, and reached into his robes, taking out a silver pocket watch. He flipped it open and narrow his eyes at the face before answering, "It's nearing nine thirty- past curfew."

"We should probably get going then," Lydia said, standing up and finally losing hold of his hand. He nodded, and took her lead, standing up. Slowly, and almost mournfully she gathered her things, stuffing the books and stray papers into her messenger bag as he watched with grim eyes. Slinging the bag over her shoulder, she came to stand by him and they proceeded to walk through the rows of shelves. As they went through the door, Lydia stopped.

"Will you wait a minute? I told Madam Pince I would lock up."

"Of course," Severus said, also stopping and moving to stand next to her as she held the door shut and turned the key. After she was sure the door was locked, they began to walk again.

"Do you think she'll be able to open the door tomorrow morning," Lydia asked.

"I'm sure she gave you an extra set."

"Probably."

As they reached the main staircases, their usual splitting fork if they were traveling together, Severus spoke up, "Do you want me to walk you up to your Tower?"

Lydia thought about it for a moment. It was after curfew and it would be better if she did get caught, to be caught with Severus. And to be honest, she really didn't feel like being alone right now. But then there was always the fact he would have to make his way to the dungeons alone from one of the highest points in the castle. She would feel horrible if he got caught.

"No, it's alright. I'll manage."

"Alright," he said, sounding a bit relieved. She supposed he just asked to be polite, if Snape could be polite.

"I guess I'll see you tomorrow then?"

"Of course… Good night."

"Night," Lydia murmured, watching him walk down the corridor, unpleasantly similar to a previous experience in the same corridor earlier that night, "Wait, Severus!"

He turned around, looking puzzled.

"Thank you."

He simply nodded, and turned back around, continuing on his way. Lydia watched him go, before making her own leave to start the hike p to Ravenclaw Tower.

-----

As Severus rounded the corner, he stopped, knowing he was out of sight. Defeated and irritated, he leaned against the stone wall beside him and sighed, "Salazar, what have I dragged her into?"

-----

A/N- I just want to let you all know, I just failed a Math test because instead of studying for my independent chapter, I was writing this chapter! It's alright though. It's worth it. I hoped you liked this chapter. It was a bit hard to write and I would totally appreciate feedback.

Now, I'd like to thank all my reviewers who were extra fabulous this last chapter!

An Anti-Sheep Cheese Muffin- I know… that elf is an idiot. I actually had to play the part of the annoying waitress in a play…ugh…

Jade- Thank you! I'm so glad you thin Lydia is a good character. I'm constantly paranoid that she is a Mary Sue, but that's probably due to my utter lack of confidence. Thanks!

LiLy MaLfOy13- Thanks so much for reviewing! I'm glad you like it!

risi- Yeah, Remus has a bit to work out… but that's for later. Lydia did show some pretty nice self control. Not only would I have smashed the spaghetti all over the elf, I would have hexed it too.

skytten334- Oh, man, this is possibly the coolest review ever! I love long reviews, but this was extraordinary! Way to make my day and totally motivate me to actually write on schedule. I'm happy that you like Lydia, because she is so hard to develop and also glad you like Morrie and Elle. Elle was actually inspired by one of my own friends, and originally Morrie was just something out of my head, but she decided to turn into me- to blunt and arrogant for her own good…woops… Man, I was so worried about canon characters not being in character, so that just took a lot of pressure off…

Lady Claudia, I'm afraid, is an author I haven't read before. I actually don't read a lot of Snape stories, mainly because they are either Hermione/Snape (cringe) or Snape/Mary Sue. You know, the typical new DADA teacher is a match met for Snape! Thing. I unfortunately am a too passionate Draco/Ginny shipper…

About the time period, I felt the same way after reading book five. I wanted so badly to see a Marauder period fic, but I couldn't seem to find one that fit my tastes. So I decided to write this one. I hope it lives up to people's expectations.

Oh, man book six is gonna be epic! I'm going into the city to buy it at midnight!

Don't worry; I'm usually pretty good about updating. I do at least twice a week, but a lot of the time three. I won't stop, not when going strong with this story… Storms is still sort of on hold because of this though…eh…

I'm glad you picked up all the little clues I've been throwing around. I was afraid they were too subtle. And the four stages thing is amazing. I totally think it is right. You have to tell me what Buffy book it is because one of my best friends is a huge Buffy fan, and she probably has it.

About Fluff- Fluff isn't necessarily a fan fiction term, but is used a lot, I know, in my American everyday life. It means sicken romantic in a totally cliché way, to put it simply.

And finally about betas- I did have one at one point, and she was great for correcting stuff, but she tried to impose on the story far too much, and I like to post chapters right when I get them done, not wait around for someone to send me back the next chapter. So I gave up on them. And thank you for pointing out those errors, because I never would have caught them. I've been meaning to clean up grammatically, but I lazy, what can I say?

Oh man, I am so not reading any of this author's note over. It's too fricken late…

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I BEG YOU OF MERCY, GIVE ME SOME LONG OPINIONATED RAMBLY REVIEWS!!!

I'm just horrible…