Apple: Heyo! I'm so glad lotsa people reviewed! I feel so loved n.n

Picup: Hehe, it's finally here, we find out who Tex is.

Nightmare3/Nightmare: Hehe n.n thanks. You'll have to wait a while for O'malley though. And yeah, I REALLY chickened out on the "Fcktard" thing….I wanted to do it though.

K-Gforever: Yep, Pegasi have bad manners. Hehe, nope Sain didn't die. Erk did instead.

Zeff: Okay, here's how it goes, RvB is just two teams, the red team and the blue team fighting each other. All the characters are important. Here's a list:

Erk: Private Church (Blue)
Wil: Private Tucker (Blue)
Sain: Private Grif (Red)

Kent: Private Simmons (Red)
Wallace: Sarge (Red)

Lopez: Red team's mechanized droid guy

And a few freelancers here and there

But everybody technically is "a main character."

Onionbreath002: Yes, I remember how you hate Erk so much. And I'm stealing him as a muse! MUAHAHAHA!

Erk: ...Christ, now I'm YOUR muse?

Apple: Yes, I stole you from CharChar.

Erk: ...I will not be responsible if he kills you for that.

Apple: Nah, he won't kill me. He loves me.

Erk: Right...he has your picture on a dartboard.

Apple: -cry-

Erk: Okay, let's start this before it gets weird. And she doesn't own FE nor RvB and she doesn't own me either. I'm a figment of Onionbreath002 who personally hates me as well. Man, why am I so hated?

Apple: But I love you Erky! -hug-

Erk: ACK! STOP! JUST BEGIN WITH THE FIC ALREADY! Your A/N just like...blasted in length

Post-Erk

Lucius watched as his teammates ran up the ramp to the top of red base.

"What happened?" He asked.

"Big...pegasus...trampling...WOO!" Sain panted.

"Damn man, we only ran like 100 feet. You're really out of shape." Kent noted.

"Fuck…you…" Sain panted in response.

"Where's your horse?" Lucius interrupted as he noticed the two ran back without the Arabian Purebred.

"General Roland here had a great strategy to leave it behind." Kent explained.

"Hey, it would've worked if that Pegasus hadn't shown up." Sain argued.

"YOU LOST THE HORSE!" Lucius exclaimed. "Oh man, Raven is gonna be pissed at you."

"….isn't he ALWAYS pissed?" Sain asked.

"true…." Kent said. "But now he's gonna be even MORE pissed at you."

"Ahh crap….I thought that wasn't possible." Sain said.

"Where is the horse anyways?" Lucius asked.

As soon as he said that, a loud kick followed by a painful whinnying rang out in the field. Moments later, the horse flew over the base and landed painfully in front of Sain.

"What the hell?" Sain mused.

Then as a rude wake up call, a pair of hoofs smashed loudly against one wall of the base, creating a huge racket and shaking the ground.

"SON OF A BITCH!" Sain yelled.

"OH CRAP!" Lucius yelled. "What the hell is that thing!"

"THAT'S THE PEGASUS!" Sain yelled back panting.

"Hey...uhh...Sain, you wanna hold the flag for a bit?" Lucius asked nerviously.

"NO! Keep that away from me!" Sain said backing away.

Meanwhile, Huey, with the pink haired girl in tow, made repeated strikes at the red fortress, successfully making a huge racket with each pass. Wil looked from the side, wondering why the Pegasus was so intent on killing the red team's horse.

"Why do you keep going for the horse!" He yelled to the girl.

"BECAUSE HE'S LOCKED ON!" She screamed back holding on for her dear life as the Pegasus smashed into the wall again.

"Well, UNLOCK IT!" Will shouted.

"LAST TIME I UNLOCKED IT, I KILLED ERKY!"

"Ohh…." Wil said thoughtfully. "Keep trying to kill the horse."

Back at the red base, Lucius was hiding with the flag. He turned towards his companions on the other side.

"I hate to point this out guys…." He said. "But I think we're screwed."

"Yeah…I have to agree with the lackey on this one…." Kent said.

As soon as he said that, their saving grace came in form of their voice transmitting devices, AKA cheap warp staves.

"Blood Gulch outpost number one, come in blood gulch outpost number one. Come in. Do you read me? This is Wallace." A voice cracked out.

"St. Elimine!" Sain said joyously. "Wallace, is that you?"

"Roger that private." Wallace replied. "I am currently on inbound on Pegasi transport to your location from command."

"SIR!" Kent called out. "This is Kent!"

"Hello Kent." Wallace said with more emotion. "I hope everything's been alright since I've been gone."

"Actually sir..." Sain said. "Things are kinda hectic right now. The new lackey arrived, and somehow he managed to infiltrate the blue base. And now we have their flag, the horse is hurt, one of the guys is dead, and there's this huge ass Pegasus here about to squash us all."

"……………………………………………am I talking to the right base?" Wallace asked after a long silence.

"Wallace, WE ARE GOING TO DIE HERE!" Sain said clearly for him.

"Well then hold tight boys…." Wallace said. "I think I got a solution to your tank problem."

With that said, Wallace dropped from the sky with a giant ballista. He began to crank the bolt.

Wil noticed the ballista and its nasty bolt.

"Uh oh…Hey Serra…" Wil said, addressing the girl by her name for the first time while backing away. "You might want to get off the Pegasus….like RIGHT now."

"AHH!" Serra yelled as she frantically tried to dismount. Unfortunately, her robes got caught in the saddle and she worked to free them. Wallace cranked the bolt into position and began to take aim. Serra freed herself then and continued to dismount, but unfortunately, she got her foot stuck in the stirrups. Cursing she worked to free them. Wallace cranked the bolt into position and gave the signal, with a loud whoosh, the bolt launched from the huge ballista. Just then Serra freed herself and ran away as fast as she could from Huey. Just as she left, the huge bolt struck Huey in the leg and the Pegasus gave a loud cry before falling limp, badly injured.

"Man….that was close…." She gasped.

"Look at your Pegasus though…." Wil said.

"Will I dream? Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaisys….Daaaaaaaaaaaaisys…." Huey gasped before falling into unconsciousness.

"NOOOOO! HUEY!" Serra cried out.

"What? NO HUEY! Wait….Huey? Who's Huey?" Wil asked.

"He was the nice person in the tank. He was my friend." Serra sobbed.

"Dude!" Wil said. "I knew you could pick up people in the Pegasus.

Wil and Serra got back to base and Serra set off to clean Wil's armor. Meanwhile, Wil got on his cheap warp stave and contacted blue command.

"Hello blue command, come in blue command, this is Blood Gulch outpost alpha. Do you read me?"

Okay, that is the last of it." Serra said wiping off the last of the black smudges off Wil's armor.

"Did you get all the black stuff off?" Wil asked

Then he was interrupted by a voice from his stave. "This is blue command. Come in Blood Gulch outpost alpha."

"Hello! Command! We need help!"

"Roger that." The blue command dispatch, a red haired man named Eliwood said. "What is your request?"

"I don't know what the technical military term is for it, but we're pretty fucked up down here. We need men!" Wil said informally.

"Dude…." Eliwood said awkwardly. "How long have you guys been down there?"

"Nonononono! Not like that!" Wil corrected immediately. "We need more men to help us."

"Roger that." Eliwood said sighing in relief. "Did you get the Pegasus we sent?"

"Yeah….." Wil explained slowly. "That got shot down by a huge ballista."

"Wow…sucks to be you."

"Yeah, we know."

"Okay, here's what I can do." Eliwood explained. "The nearest blue forces can be there in sixteen days, or I can-"

"Sixteen days!" Wil interjected. "That's almost two weeks!"

"OR…." Eliwood said strongly. "I can hire a nearby freelancer and get him there within a few hours."

"I like the, in an hour one." Serra said.

"Yeah, me too." Wil agreed. "Roger that command, we prefer the quicker solution."

"Ten-four Blood Gulch. We will contact freelancer Farina and get 'em there post haste. Command out."

"Whoever he is, make sure he can fix the tank."

"What's a freelancer?" Serra asked.

"Freelancers aren't red or blue. They're just guns for hire to whoever has the most money." Wil explained.

"Like a mercenary!" Serra said.

"Right, or like your mom, when the taxes are due." Wil poked.

"……OH! That's funny." Serra said, picking up the humor.

"Really? You didn't think that was too obvious?"

"No no, not at all, that was good."

Just then, an errie voice spoke out from behind the two…

"Willllllll…. SERRRRAAAAAAAAAA!" The voice said while a ghostly image of Erk materialized.

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!" Wil screamed when he saw the ghost.

"I am the ghost of Erk…." Erk's ghost said. "And I've come back with a WARRRRRRRRRRRRNING!"

"You're not Erk." Serra said laughing. "Erk has blue armor and purple hair. You're all white!"

"Lackey, SHUT UP!" Erk said in his normal irritated voice. "I'm a freaking ghost! Have you ever seen a purple haired blue ghost!"

"Yeah…that's definitely him." Wil mumbled.

"Now I have to start over…." Erk grumbled then he cleared his throat and once again in his eerie voice, "Willlllllll! SERRAAAAAAAAAA! I've come back with a WARRRRRRRNING!"

"Is it really necessary to do the voice?" Wil asked.

"Yeah, it's getting kinda annoying." Serra said.

"All right, fine." Erk grumbled. "Okay, here's the deal. I've come back from the dead to give you a warning about Farina."

"What's the warning?" Serra asked, oblivious to Erk's obvious irritation.

"Shut up for one second and I'll tell you!" Erk snapped.

"Oh…sorry." Serra apologized.

"Seriously man, I'm coming back from the great beyond here, do you think this is easy? It's not! It's not like I can you know... pop in and out whenever I feel like it. It takes a lot of concentration!" Erk explained.

"Sorry..." Serra echoed.

"I mean it's bad enough you've killed me to begin with, but now that I've come back I can't even get a word out in edgewise man." Erk continued. "Okay…. Here's the deal."

"Is this the warning?" Serra interrupted again.

"Okay that's it; I swear to St. Elmine Serra, your ass is haunted." Erk said. "When we're done here, I'm going to haunt you."

"Yeah…you're even starting to bug me." Wil added.

"All right, Wil." Erk said turning his attention away from the annoying girl. "You remember that I told you I was stationed in Ilia before they transferred me to Blood Gulch, right?"

"No." Wil said.

"Ilia?" Serra said quizzically. "Isn't that the island covered in eternal snow?"

"Yes….."

"Cool! What was that like!" Serra asked enthusiastically.

"Umm….it was cold." Erk said.

"What? That's it?" Serra said disappointed. "Just cold?"

"What do you want from me? A poem?" Erk snapped. "It's an island where it NEVER stops snowing. It's really... you just let him talk?" Wil said, getting irritated as well.

"Okay..." Erk continued. "One day when I was there, everything was just like normal. I remember, I was out on patrol with my partner Dorcas. That Dorcas was a real nice kid. Everybody liked him."

"Do you think I was a good kid Erk?" Wil asked

"Wil, don't get jealous man, just listen to the story okay?" Erk said. "Like I said, guys were hanging around, waitin' for some action, bitchin' about the cold. Anyways, Dorcas was telling me all about this girlfriend he had back home."

Flashback---

"Yep, as soon as I get back, I'm gonna get down on one knee, and ask her to marry me." Dorcas said

And that's when Farina showed up.

A magically cloaked figure looks over the blue base assessing its targets.

Private Guy was the first to go. He was half way across the base when he suddenly started yelling bloody murder.

"BLOODY MURDER! BLOODY MURDER!" Guy yelled, firing bolts from his killer bow into the ground.

The whole thing was over before it even started.

The hooded figure ran about the field, strangling everyone in sight with his bowstring.

Poor Dorcas was the last to go. Farina walked right up to him, pulled his skull right out of his head and beat him to death with it.

End Flashback---

"Wait a second!" Wil interjected. "How do you beat someone to death with their own skull? That doesn't seem physically possible."

"That's exactly what Dorcas was saying!" Erk said surprised.

Flashback---

The person, now uncloaked, had a skull in his hand and was smashing it into Dorcas as blood flew from his body.

"THIS DOESN'T SEEM PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE!" Dorcas uttered before falling dead to the ground.

End Flashback---

"Bottom line is, these freelancers are bad news, and Farina, is one of the worst." Erk finished.

"If he's such a badass, why didn't he kill you?"

"To tell you the truth, I don't know why I wasn't dead." Erk said. "Could've killed me at any time. But maybe it's because Farina and I have run into one another once before."

"Where?" Wil asked.

"You uh….you remember that girl I told you about back home?" Erk asked. "Well, let's just say that Farina's the real reason why we're not married. Guys, I'm fading fast and I don't know when I'll be able to come back. Just listen to my warning. Don't let Farina get involved here."

"Okay." Wil assured him.

"I mean it Wil." Erk said. "No fighting, no scouting, nothing. You'll regret it."

With that, the ghost of Erk faded into nothingness.

"SO, Farina and Erk were after the same girl!" Wil said, jumping to conclusions.

"I told you his girlfriend was a slut." Serra said smiling a bit.

Behind them, a black clad figure with fringes of blue hair under the helmet stood looking at the two gossiping. The figure held an iron bow pointed right at the two and did not indicate any amusement from the gossip.

Apple: I'm finished! Finally. This was a fun chapter to write, albeit awkward at moments. Yeah, Serra and Wil have no clue that Farina's an obvious girl name. But eh, it's those two, what didja expect? Anyways, hope you keep reading and reviewing n.n

Erk: PS, Apple's a worse muse-torturer than Charlie is.

Apple: -hides torture devices behind her back, pouts and looks innocent-

Erk: …..Charlie...save me!

Apple: n.n hehe, remember to review guys! -closes door and hideous screaming is heard-