MMMM FOOD:

I was in my dorm alone, reading my book, when I heard my roommates enter.

"You know what? I want to make my hair blonde, does anyone wanna help me?" Amy asked randomly.

"Uhh… Amy, your hair is already blonde." Kate pointed out.

"Yeah, I no, but I want it to be blonder, I don't like the brown streaky things in It." answered Amy rolling her eyes.

"I like the brownyness." said Lily.

"It makes you look smarter than you really are" I said, joining the conversation.

Amy grabbed a pillow and chucked it at my head. It missed.

…

"Must… eat… chocolate" I said "…Hey! Anyone wanna go o the kitchens with me?"

I had found the kitchens in the 1st year when I had gotten lost on my way to herbology. I thought the pear was cute, so I randomly tickled it. Lucky, eh?

"Me! Oh I wanna go!" said Lily as she wiggling her arm around in the air.

"Anyone else?" they were all ignoring me… again. So Lily and I left the dorm and headed towards the kitchen.

"Those house elves are so cute, I can't wait to see Bobo again!" said Lily excitedly.

"Mmmmm, food" I drooled. Then I grabbed Lily's sleeve and wiped the drool off my chin.

"Ewwww, gross! You sick monkey! Is that all you ever think about?

I was still drooling. Rolling her eyes, Lily tickled the pear, and we entered.

"Miss Lily Evens! Miss Jemma Collins!" squeaked a house elf. I think it was Bobo's sister, Meme.

"Meme, how are you?" asked Lilly

God I hated Lily when she's nice to people… creatures… yeah. It was just wrong. WRONG I TELL YOU!

"Meme is very good! Can I be offering you anything to eat?" asked the retarded house elf.

"Actually yea," I said enthusiastically. "How about a hot chocolate; four marshmallows inside, those scone-y things you gave me last time, a couple of chocolate éclairs, a slice of chocolate cake covered in chocolate syrup, and… some chocolate."

There was a slight pause as Meme looked expectantly at Lilly, who was staring at Jemma.

"… I'll just have a hot chocky… two marshmallows thanks…"

We left the kitchens with a tray full of food and headed back to the Gryffindor tower, where we walked around a corner and right into Sirius and James.

"Ah shit!" I had swerved to avoid collision, and now I was running around in a circle, trying to stop the tray from tipping.

"Sorry, m'ladies!" said Sirius , though he made no effort to try and help me. Neither did James, for that matter.

I finally had the tray under control, so I stopped running around.

We all just stared at each other for a bit.

"So…" James said.

Then, for no apparent reason, Sirius winked weirdly.

"Ah, no! My eyes burn, promise me you'll never wink again Sirius!" I said dramatically covering my eyes with my hands, and nearly losing the tray again.

"Ha! I told you that you looked gay when you did that Padfoot!" said James smiling smugly.

"Padfoot?" I asked, noticing that Lily was pretending that she didn't notice James standing there. In front of her.

"…I …don't … know…" said James as he ran his hands through his really…messy hair.

"Well, me and Lils here are gonna go to bed. Night all!" and then we walked away, leaving those two to their gay intentions… or not…

"Hey, it's like 5 pm. isn't it a bit early to sleep yet?" James asked, scratching the back of his head.

"Probably going to have a little romp in the bedroom together… in their lingerie… "

We entered our dorms with our chocolaty food, when we saw Amy and Kate with salad on their faces.

"YAY" I screamed as I jumped onto the bed occupied by the green faced girls. "I love facials." I randomly picked up a bottle of green face mask, smothered it everywhere, and put some cucumbers on my eyes.

"Is… is that the Spice girls I hear?" asked Lily as she looked around the room for a radio of some sort.

"Yu-hu, Amy put the volume full blast." said Kate.

"Hey Amy, Kate, you might wanna put your tops on sometime soon" said Lily.

"We don't want to ruin our tops!" Amy said, adjusting her bra a little.

So Lily and I started to get changed as well. (I ate the cucumbers that were on my eyes. Hey man, waste not, want not!)

I was just about to but my shorts on when my favorite spice girls song came on.

"Oh my god, oh my god, OH MY GOOOOD! I LURVE THIS SONG!... dununununu…STOP RIGHT NOW, THANK-YOU VERY MUCH! I NEED SOMEBODY WITH A HUMAN TO-O-OUCH. HEY YOU ALWAYS ON THE RUN, GOTTA SLOW IT DOWN BABY, GOTTA HAVE SOME FU-U-U-UN" I sang in the loudest voice possible, dancing around on the bed, when BAM! The door burst open, to reveal three boys standing in the doorway. Yup, you've guessed it. The marauders (wormshit not included).

I was standing their in my bra and undies, my hands in the air, and a green face. Spice Girls was still going in the background.

"Err… hi?"

They all burst out into hysterical laughter.

"Can…I have…some …fun…with you…Collins?' asked Sirius through his laughter.

Ok, so now I was embarrassed. And when I get embarrassed, I get angry. "…. POTTER, BLACK, LUPIN, YOU GUYS ARE ALL GOIN TO DIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE" I screamed my head off like a banshee, only to cause more laughter between the three boys. Remus being the smart one had already bolted for his life, but James and Sirius didn't seem capable of moving anywhere.

I quickly shoved on a pair of shorts, and stuffed myself into a button up shirt. But I didn't have time to button it. oh no, James and Sirius were already escaping. And I had to get them. Now.

"Urgh! You fat, ugly, stupid morons! I hate you! I hope you all die! Perverts! HARASSERS! " I screeched angrily as I saw James's leg disappeared through the doorway into the common room.

Sirius was about to fall down because of laughing so hard, when I caught up to him and kneed him in the balls (ha ha ha ha)

Sirius the maniac, was still laughing , after I had bloody kneed him in the balls, kneed!

"stop…it…you…killing…me" said Sirius as rolled around on the floor laughing

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH" I yelled in fustrration, I grabbed his legs and pulled him towards the girls dormitories.

Ok there is hat chapter…..thanx to my sister, she made it better….THANX KAT