Curt pulled himself up the stairs and dragged through the hall. He stopped by his door and rummaged his pockets for his keys.
Why did this happen to us? The words ran through his head.
He forced the key through the slot and turned it. The door slammed shut behind him.
He sat on his bed and kicked his boots off. Then he stood up, unbuttoned his pants, and let them drop on the floor.
He sat down again, feeling uneasy, and looked over to his right, at the record player. He walked over to where it rested and checked to see which record was in it. Satisfied with what he saw, he left it in and turned the player on. Leaving the volume on the highest setting, he proceeded to the bathroom.
Timothy, I took your place, the song rolled on.
Timothy, cause it's such a waste
He turned the showerhead on. The water drowned some of the sound and some of his problems, or so he hoped.
Timothy, we found your spaceship
Timothy, it's the farthest you've ever flown
Never used your head
To find out what this whole thing meant
He stood directly under the water, letting it pound on his head.
It's not what it seems, but it is
Timothy where have you been?
Timothy where have you been?
He took the soap and rubbed it against his body, gliding it carefully over every curve. He flinched. All of a sudden, he was in pain. His whole body ached. He ignored it and clawed at his chest, fiercely raking the remains of the liquor.
Timothy, where did you go?
Timothy, the boy can throw
Timothy, we found your spaceship
Maxwell Demon. He and Brian. What was the difference? Both were difficult, sometimes impossible… More importantly, what was it about them? What was it that beguiled him so?
Timothy, did it hurt when you hit the ground?
Next, he focused his energy on his hair, tousling it vigorously in a lather.
Never used your legs
To walk 'round in this whole big mess
It's not what it seems, but it is
Timothy where have you been?
She cried in the kitchen
to let you go
Timothy where have you been?
He slithered down to sit and leaned against the tile wall. The music settled inside him as he watched the bubbles wash down his skin.
Missed your photo
Missed your birthday too
Missed your photo
It's not what it seems, but it is
Timothy where have you been?
She cried in the kitchen
to let you go
Timothy where have you been?
He grasped the tiles and pushed against them to bring himself up. His body felt so heavy, like something was weighing him down. Then, he gathered his hands, letting the water collect on his palms. He splashed it on his face.
Missed your photo
Missed your birthday too
Missed your photo
Missed your birthday too
Recognizing the song's end, Curt got out of the shower and wrapped himself in a towel. He walked on his heels towards the record player, dripping a trail behind him. The record stopped playing as soon as he lifted the needle off of it.
After drying, he dug himself something to wear out of a pile of clothes. He decided on some stretch tweed pants and a fitted maroon t-shirt. He stood before a mirror that was hanging on the wall and applied his eyeliner. Then he combed his hands through his hair.
To finish, he picked out a pair of two-inch cowboy heels from an assortment of shoes spread out on a door mat.
When he was done, he fell back on the bed, his feet staying on the floor. Water slowly trickled from his hair and soaked the sheets.
He closed his eyes and laid his arms across the bed. His most hated memory entered his mind.
It hadn't been long since their separation. He cut his hair, in sort of mourning, and dyed it back to its original color. Only seven days had passed and he was ready to return to Brian, like a heartsick puppy begging for its master.
"Why did this happen to us?" he asked. "We could've fixed it. We can still fix it." he said enthusiastically.
"I'm not gonna take you back if that's what you came here for." Brian said coldly. He was always the stronger one.
"Do you feel better?" Curt asked, almost mockingly. "You feel good about yourself!"
"I don't do things to feel good about myself." Brian answered dryly. "But wait, that's right. I'm supposed to be the selfish one. So, I'm gonna be selfish and do the selfish thing to do and leave you…cause you're pathetic. You're the pathetic one who always tries to be…understanding." He left Curt and went inside.
Curt stayed by the car like a martyr, remotely hoping that Brian would change his mind. For the first time, he was truly afraid.
Brian merely stood by his window, looking down disdainfully at the one he used to look at with so much affection. He wondered if he meant the burning words he spat out of his mouth. They gnawed at him now, eating him up bit by bit.
Curt looked at the concrete and sunk his teeth down his lip. He didn't waste any more time and slid inside the car. He buried his face in his hand, crying silently, as soon as he was sure that the car was out of Brian's sight.
But he was wrong. Brian did see him. He abandoned the window and shrank by the side, crying into a corner. His fragile frame shook with each powerful sob.
Curt woke up from his memory and blinked his eyes rapidly. He grabbed his keys and stormed out.
Why did this happen to us? It kept playing in his head.
Why did this happen? To…us? WHY? It followed him everywhere, it seemed.
Disclaimer: I don't own the song "Timothy." It belongs to Jet.
Note: I know. This is the third one from Jet. Hey, their songs work really well with the story. At least…I think they do. I mean, I hope they do.